Hi, I am a 27-year-old male living in Gurugram, in a 28-month relationship (25 months long distance - she lives in southern India). Lately, we've been fighting a lot, and she recently said she doesn't feel loved, happy, or supported. She's having a tough time at work, where her boss said she might lose her job in 6 months, and is facing family issues. She says I'm not supportive, which causes our fights. I'm trying my best to be there for her, but she thinks I'm not putting in effort, triggering fights and making me react badly. During fights, she gives me the silent treatment for 2-3 days, and everything gets blamed on me. This silent treatment is intolerable and eats me up. I know she loves me, and I love her, but it's becoming very difficult to deal with. Can you please help me as I'm at a breaking point?
Ans: Maturity, patience in abundance is required in a long distance relationship. She seems to be in an insecure place. She has been given 6 months to shape up at her job, that is a long time - if the work place is toxic, she needs to start looking out as it can take 4-5 months to find a new job. You said she is facing challenges at home too. Please ask her specifically what support she seeks from you vs telling you that you are not supportive or dont understand her - you cannot till she spells out what she wants. Once she does, see where you can support. All the best.