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29-Year-Old Man Worries if Avoiding Relationships Will Hurt His Marriage Prospects

Shalini

Shalini Singh  |164 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Sep 01, 2024

Shalini Singh is the founder of andwemet, an online matchmaking service for urban Indians living in India and overseas. After graduating from college as a kindergarten teacher, Singh worked at various firms specialising in marketing strategy, digital marketing and public relations before finding her niche as an entrepreneur. In 2008, she founded Galvanise PR, an independent communications and public relations. In 2019, she launched andwemet.
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Asked by Anonymous - Aug 31, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

I am 29 years old man. My concern is related to love. I have never really been in a relationship. I'm not sure how much success I would have had if I even would have tried. I have been complemented by women saying that they find me attractive. But didn't go beyond that and I never really pursued it beyond that. The reason being I never wanted to risk being emotionally attached to someone who wouldn't necessarily be there for me in the long term. That's why I never pursued a relationship. I'm not socially awkward or easily get anxious. I used to think that it is better if I wait for marriage as well. But given the times I'm made to feel like that is now considered a 'red flag' these days. I just wanted to know if this would hurt my marriage prospects. I do believe in women having an equal opinion in the relationship. I don't hold any opinions that could be considered misogynistic or sexist. But I just wish to know is it really a red flag and if it is what do I do to tackle the same

Ans: Are you asking if not being in a relationship will hurt your marriage prospects? Being in a relationship is a personal choice and you can be in one at any age before you marry - highly recommended to be friends with the person you decide to marry. all the best

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |605 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 02, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 01, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Hi,i am a 28 year old woman being at crossroads when it comes to relationships. I am one of the unluckiest souls in this universe.An old school romantic being following the philosophy of one man woman.My love life consists of numerous one sided loves,crushes,2 three year old failed long distance relationships and terminating one potential long term romance(this was also long distance)See,I would want to be in a loving and long term relationship resulting in marriage.I guess i have always dated to marry. But unfortunately, my search for that one true love is still not coming to an end. I don’t know where am i going wrong? Am i asking for too much? Because the moment i said yes or responded to their advances ,they would become way too busy and i become an option. Before i say yes,they would always court me. I have to initiate the conversations every single time. As i result i stopped looking for love and start working on myself. I don't mind being single forever and skip marriage.I know there's something wrong in my apporach. Just tell me where am i going wrong?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

There's nothing wrong with your approach but I want to share a piece of advice that might help you in your dating journey. Instead of approaching relationships with the sole intention of finding a life partner, consider dating for the sake of love and happiness. Not every person you meet will be your soulmate, and that's perfectly okay. Sometimes, we need to experience a few heartbreaks and failed relationships before finding the right one. I appreciate that you have started focusing on yourself, but that does not mean you have to stop looking for a companion. Both are not mutually exclusive. And it's sad but some men indeed lose their interest in a woman as soon as the "chase" is over. But the good news is, it is only some men, not all.

I say stop looking for a man to settle down with because that might lead to compromises to make the relationship work. Instead, find a man who makes you happy. Enjoy the process of dating and evaluate the individual based on genuine compatibility and shared happiness.

Best Wishes!

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |605 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jun 18, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 17, 2024Hindi
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Hey love Gurus I am 24 year old male. Well educated and decent looking. But i have never had a girlfriend not had i ever kissed a girl. I have also never bothered much on this until my 20 year of age. But now for past year or 2 it has started haunting me a bit because I am scared of what would happen when i get married. I don't have any sort of experience and this scares me. I know it's too early to think of marriage but still I feel low when this topic comes to my mind. Please guide me. I really need a good advice Is it that I am thinking too much?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

It's totally normal to feel anxious about the future and any relationship to come your way in the future. Here are some advice-

• Be kind to yourself. You are not alone in this. Not everyone moves at the same pace. Some start dating early, some start late. Some have more experience than others. But everyone has to face firsts. While it is natural to feel anxious, with the right partner and at the right timeline, things often tend to work out better than we imagine.
• Focus on building confidence. You are more than your dating experience. Pursue a hobby, socialize, work on developing new skills, work to improve your body and mind. Everything in turn will increase your confidence level.
• Educate yourself. You can read books on anxiety or if you have a clear idea of what about a relationship or what about marriage is making you conscious, you can educate yourself on that part. What is known to us, rarely makes us feel anxious. We mostly fear the unknown.
• For your future first relationship- take it slow. Communicate. What you are comfortable with, what you aren't, communicate everything.
• If your anxiety is interfering with your day-to-day activity, I recommend seeing a professional. It's still early and nipped in the bud, this anxiety will lead to nothing serious. But if you let it take root, it might be more difficult to manage.

Understand that it is okay where you are. Also, as you mentioned, you are too young to worry about it. But since you are already worrying, I am glad that you seeked help.

Best Wishes.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |605 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 07, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi, I am 32 year old male. I have contentment in all major aspects of life such as job, money, friends, family, fun etc. But everytime I try to bring a girl into my life everything just turns in to chaos. There is a lot of pressure from from family, friends and almost everyone that I know for me to get married. But I cannot accept just anyone in my life through matrimony sites or references. I am afraid that the hard work that I have put in all these years to make my life comfortable will be shaken up by marriage. I cannot choose people by their attributes but have to just develop a liking for them. Similarly I have no interest in how a girl looks, what job she does or any material aspects. I am happy with someone who choses me completely and is committed to me. Unfortunately I couldn't find anyone such and I am in the phase of saying no to marriage completely as life is good as it is. I had a girlfriend when I was 25 and she left me after 5 years of relationship because her parents did not accept which I respected. Could connect with anyone else until this year who also left me after an year because her parents will not agree as my parents are not rich enough. I cannot connect with anyone else physically or emotionally. I think it's injustice to the woman I marry if I marry her just for the sake of society. I am completely confused, could you please share your expertise on this. Thanks in advance!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

It's amazing how you are putting other people's needs over yours. That's very selfless of you. If you don't feel you are ready to commit, there is no rush; no matter what people say. I understand that societal pressure can be very tough, but as you said, being in an incompatible relationship will be tougher on both you and the woman. All I can say here is wait. You are content with your life, and that is more than most people have. Focus on that. Make it even better. If and when the time is right, you will meet someone, and things will fall into place. It might sound cliche, but trust me, this is the best thing to do. Again, I repeat, do not give in to peer pressure. No good things can come out of it.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |605 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 07, 2024
Relationship
I (27M) am well Educated & well settled in a High-paying Job. Tall, Handsome & Fit. I am a Sociable & Outgoing person, but I never had a Girlfriend because I believe in having an Arranged Marriage with a Girl from the same Community, who's Family background is known to Parents. I strongly believe in abstaining from any kind of Sexual Intimacy until I get Married, due to my Personal, Moral, Ethical, Emotional as well as Religious & Socio-cultural Values. I'd want to experience even my First Kiss, only after getting Married to my Life Partner. And obviously, I expect my Future Life Partner also to Share similar Values. I cannot settle for Marriage with a Girl who had Pre-marital Sex (or even Kissed) anyone else in a Romantic Relationship, prior to Marriage. I would Reject such a Girl, however Beautiful, Well-Educated & Well-Earning she might be (all other Qualities being Subjective). Now, my Family has started looking up suitable Brides for me, within my Community. The Problem is that most Girls of our Community, in this Generation, are Well Educated & Financially Independent, staying in Cities, away from Parents & most of them, probably had Romantic Relationship(s) & experienced Physical Intimacy, at any Base Level. I know this by closely observing & discussing with many Girls of my Community (including my Female Cousins, Female Friends & Neighbours etc). They all are ridiculing me for my Preferences & advising me to forsake my Values, as they are Outdated in this Age. Now, I am Worried that I might never get to Marry a Girl who shares my Values. My greatest Fear is not ending up Unmarried, but getting Married to a Woman who lies about her Past (I consider it as Cheating). Can you please advise me on, how can I be absolutely Sure that a Girl is an Un-Kissed Virgin? How do I bring up this topic with any Girl before Marriage & ask her, without coming off as Creepy? How can I be Sure whether the Girl is being absolutely Honest about her Past or not? What are some other ways to find out about the Past of a Girl, apart from having an open conversation with herself? Please advise me regarding this, my Heart is not letting me foresake my Values, which are my Core Principles. I am willing to compromise on some other Qualities i.e., I'd happily settle down with a Girl who's Below Average in terms of Looks, Education & even Unemployed, as long as I can be Sure that she's an Un-Kissed Virgin. How can I be absolutely Sure of that?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You don't have to forsake your values based on others' opinions of it. If it makes you happy, you should stick to it. Having said that, you cannot force the same values on others. I understand you want a partner who has a similar mindset. The only way to get what you want is an open conversation- when you speak to a match, you can open up about your outlook and clear it from your end that you want the exact same values in your partner and politely request them to reject the alliance if she has any past relationships or has been intimate with anyone in any form. Let her know that you are not judging her, but this part is very important for you. Make it about yourself, because it is. Do not let the woman feel that there is some flaw in her, or start investigating her past.

Now, coming to your other query, how to be absolutely sure that she is telling the truth about her experiences- there is no such technique. You have to trust her. Moreover, you should understand that as much as you believe your values are important, trust in your partner is equally important in having a healthy and happy relationship. While you work on finding the partner of your choice, work on having a little more faith in people.
Hope this helps.

Best Wishes

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |7347 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 28, 2025

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CSE core in VIT AP under category 2 against ECE in JNTU Kakinada which is preferable
Ans: Ganapathi, VIT AP’s CSE (Category 2) offers a robust curriculum with a 2024 average package of ?14.43 LPA, 93%+ placement rate, and 900+ recruiters, including leading IT and tech firms, making it highly attractive for software and data-driven careers. The program emphasizes industry exposure, internships, and skill development, preparing students for diverse roles in the tech sector. JNTU Kakinada’s ECE program has a strong regional reputation, with 70–80% placement rates, an average package of ?6–8 LPA, and top offers up to ?67 LPA for CSE and ECE, but the median package is around ?4.46 LPA, and placements are more variable. ECE at JNTU Kakinada is well-suited for those interested in electronics, VLSI, and core engineering, but software roles are less frequent, and industry trends show stronger hiring in CSE than ECE. Both colleges offer good infrastructure and faculty, but VIT AP’s CSE stands out for its placement consistency, higher average packages, and broader recruiter base.

Recommendation: Prefer VIT AP CSE (Category 2) for superior placement rates, higher average salaries, and strong industry connections, especially if your son aims for a tech/software career; choose JNTU Kakinada ECE only if he is specifically interested in electronics and core engineering roles. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |7347 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 28, 2025

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My daughter is getting CSE in BIT Jaipur and Central University Jammu and SRM Kattankulathur. Which one should be considered?
Ans: SRM Kattankulathur’s CSE program stands out for its scale, infrastructure, and placement record, with over 8,900 students placed in 2023–24, 1,300+ recruiters, and an average package of ?7.92 LPA, supported by a dedicated placement cell and strong industry partnerships. BIT Jaipur, an extension of BIT Mesra, offers a reputable CSE program with nearly 95–100% placement for CSE students and an average package between ?6–12 LPA, though students may need to travel to the main campus for some top opportunities; major recruiters include Microsoft, Amazon, Infosys, and Wipro. Central University Jammu’s CSE program has a much higher closing rank, indicating lower demand, and offers fewer placement and industry connections compared to SRM and BIT Jaipur. Both SRM and BIT Jaipur provide strong academic environments, but SRM’s placement scale, recruiter diversity, and industry exposure are unmatched among the three.

Recommendation: Prefer SRM Kattankulathur CSE for its superior placement consistency, extensive recruiter network, and strong campus resources; consider BIT Jaipur only if you value its smaller cohort and BIT Mesra legacy, while Central University Jammu is less competitive for CSE placements. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir, my son is eligible for IIT Mumbai/chennai/Delhi EEE , IIT hyd CSE and IISC mathematics&computing. Could you please advise which is a better choice?
Ans: IIT Bombay, Madras, and Delhi’s Electrical/Electronics Engineering programs are among the most prestigious in India, with placement rates of 75–90% and median packages of ?20–23.5 LPA, attracting top recruiters across core engineering, consulting, and technology sectors. IIT Hyderabad’s CSE program stands out for its 2023 placement record—average package ?27.11 LPA, 144 recruiters, and a placement rate exceeding 90%, with major tech companies and international offers. IISc Bangalore’s Mathematics & Computing four-year program is highly reputed for research and analytics, but only 4% of UG students opted for placements in 2023, with most graduates pursuing higher studies or research; the median salary for those placed was ?30 LPA. While IISc offers unmatched academic and research depth, it is less industry-focused at the undergraduate level compared to IITs. IIT Hyderabad CSE provides the strongest placement outcomes and tech-sector opportunities, while IIT Bombay/Chennai/Delhi EEE offer robust interdisciplinary training and excellent placements, especially for those interested in electronics, energy, or hardware domains. The choice depends on your son’s career goals: IIT Hyderabad CSE is optimal for software and technology careers, while IIT EEE is better for core engineering and interdisciplinary roles; IISc Mathematics & Computing is ideal for research and analytics but less so for immediate industry placement.

Recommendation: Prefer IIT Hyderabad CSE for top-tier tech placements and industry focus; choose IIT Bombay/Chennai/Delhi EEE for core engineering and interdisciplinary flexibility; select IISc Mathematics & Computing only if your son is passionate about research or analytics and plans for higher studies. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |7347 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 28, 2025Hindi
Career
My son has got 96.91 percentile in MHT CET and in JEE Mains 94.90 percentile. He is interested in CSE and IT. Please suggest In which Mumbai / Navi Mumbai / Thane engineering college he can get admission
Ans: With a 96.91 percentile in MHT CET and 94.90 percentile in JEE Mains, your son has a strong chance for CSE or IT in reputed Mumbai, Navi Mumbai, or Thane colleges, though the most elite branches at COEP, VJTI, SPIT, and DJ Sanghvi are likely out of reach, as their CSE/IT cutoffs typically close above 98–99 percentile for general category. However, excellent options within his percentile range include KJ Somaiya Institute of Technology (CSE/IT), Ramrao Adik Institute of Technology (CSE/IT), Thakur College of Engineering & Technology, Don Bosco Institute of Technology, Fr. C. Rodrigues Institute of Technology, SIES Graduate School of Technology, Xavier Institute of Engineering, and Datta Meghe College of Engineering. These institutes are AICTE-approved, have active placement cells, and maintain 80–90% placement rates in CSE/IT over the last three years, with strong industry connections and modern infrastructure. Admission will be via the MHT CET CAP rounds, so list these colleges and branches in order of preference to maximize chances.

recommendation: Target KJ Somaiya, Ramrao Adik, Thakur, Don Bosco, and Fr. C. Rodrigues for CSE/IT in Mumbai/Navi Mumbai/Thane, as they offer robust placements and are accessible at your son’s percentile; prioritize them during CAP counselling for the best outcome. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |7347 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 28, 2025Hindi
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |7347 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir can i get IISc in 2026 IAT. I have studied nothing till now .I will start the syllabus. If yes then please guide. Also please tell about tie breaking policy of IAT
Ans: Admission to the four-year BSc (Research) program at IISc Bangalore via the IISER Aptitude Test (IAT) 2026 requires candidates to have passed the Class XII examination in 2024, 2025, or 2026 with at least three science subjects, including Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics, or Biology, with a minimum of 60% aggregate for General category (55% for SC/ST/PwD). Candidates should ensure they have completed at least three subjects among Biology, Chemistry, Mathematics and Physics and upload supporting documents during application. Registration opens annually in January, closing around March on the IAT portal, with admit cards made available two weeks prior to the May exam. The IAT is a 180-minute computer-based test comprising 60 multiple-choice questions—15 each from Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics, and Biology—totaling 240 marks with +4 for correct answers and –1 for incorrect ones, and no negative for unattempted questions. In IAT 2025, the closing marks for IISc Bangalore fell near 200, thus aspirants should target 210–220 to comfortably secure a rank within the top 20 and remain competitive amidst rising applicant numbers. Preparation should encompass a structured study plan spanning 10–12 months, focusing first on NCERT textbooks for foundational concepts, followed by solving past IAT and JEE problems to develop speed and accuracy, with weekly mock tests to track progress. The IAT tie-breaking policy resolves equal scores by comparing subject performances sequentially: candidates with higher Biology scores rank higher, followed by Chemistry, then Physics, and if still tied, older candidates receive preference. Diligent adherence to this regimen, combined with a thorough understanding of the syllabus and exam pattern, will optimize one’s position in the merit list and improve chances of admission to IISc Bangalore.

Recommendation: Begin immediate preparation with a structured 12-month study plan covering Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics, and Biology. Use NCERT textbooks as core resources, supplement with past IAT/JEE Advanced questions, and undertake weekly timed mock tests. Register promptly when applications open, ensure timely document uploads, and familiarise yourself with the tie-breaking policy. Aim for a minimum score of 210–220 to secure admission to IISc Bangalore, and maintain consistent, focused effort throughout your preparation. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |7347 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Ai in surat nit for integrated 5 years or 4 years cs in iiit jabalpur which would be the perfect chouce
Ans: The 5-year Integrated B.Tech+M.Tech in Artificial Intelligence at NIT Surat (SVNIT) is a new program with a total fee of ?6.25 lakh, NIRF 2024 rank of 59, and an average package of ?9.48 LPA for AI (BTech), with overall BTech placement rates around 71% and top recruiters including Adobe, Amazon, and Deloitte. The 4-year BTech CSE at IIIT Jabalpur boasts a median package of ?16.94 LPA, average package of ?19.27–21.63 LPA, and 80–85% placement rates, with CSE students averaging ?27 LPA and top recruiters like Amazon, Microsoft, and Flipkart. IIIT Jabalpur’s CSE consistently attracts more offers, higher compensation, and a broader tech-industry focus, while SVNIT’s new AI program is yet to establish a placement track record and may offer fewer core software roles. Both institutes provide strong academic and internship opportunities, but IIIT Jabalpur’s CSE offers superior placement outcomes, established industry connections, and flexibility for core software and analytics careers.

Recommendation: Prefer IIIT Jabalpur’s 4-year CSE for its higher placement rates, stronger industry reputation, and proven career flexibility; choose NIT Surat AI only if you have a dedicated interest in artificial intelligence research and a longer academic pathway. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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