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Shalini

Shalini Singh  |138 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Oct 03, 2024

Shalini Singh is the founder of andwemet, an online matchmaking service for urban Indians living in India and overseas. After graduating from college as a kindergarten teacher, Singh worked at various firms specialising in marketing strategy, digital marketing and public relations before finding her niche as an entrepreneur. In 2008, she founded Galvanise PR, an independent communications and public relations. In 2019, she launched andwemet.
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Asked by Anonymous - Oct 03, 2024
Relationship

I am 23 year old. One of my ex who is married now told me about a job opportunity in his company where I applied and got selected he became my boss. He was recently married and was staying alone in Bangalore. He made alot of things easier for me, even arranged flight tickets, hotels for me from company's expenses. From first day I reached Mumbai he kept on saying me he loves me and has no intimacy with his wife it was a forced marriage and he can't live without me he came to check me at my hotel and he tried kissing me and when I resisted he said he has never touched his wife, it was his dream to loose his virginity with me only once he wants to have sex with me it was his dream I am his first love he can never be happy with that lady but this one moment will be enough to keep him happy and healthy convinced me to the level I gave up and we had sex that day. Later that day I got to know that he had clicked pictures of whatever happened. When I confronted him he said whenever he will miss me he will see this. I was like u did dis without my knowledge it's wrong without my permission. I left that company and Mumbai immediately in few days. I feel really bad, how I got into his words although I was single but I have a guilty of helping him in cheating his wife. Now he is having 2 children and a very happy mai life and I still keep blaming myself for having a thing with a married man and immense guilty for helping him cheating his wife. I have lost my mental peace. Is it all my fault??? It been 5 years since this things happened. I am happily married now and have no contact with that man but is it correct myself for it. Was it completely my fault. Have i cheated his wife or i myself got cheated by a liar?

Ans: 1. Was it your fault - 23 you are an adult, and someone who can take decisions, you decided to give in, allow him to take photographs - not about fault, but you gave consent
2. Have you got cheated by a liar - yes you did
3. Did you cheat his wife - he cheated his wife and you cheated yourself

Please make sure you BLOCK him from all social media handles, your phone number - surprised that you are still tracking him. And get out of your guilt and focus on your life.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 14, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 26, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Dear sir, I am a widow of 44 yrs reputed officer and I am also working at a reputed post. I have a daughter also. 2 yrs back I gave a matrimoni adv on a online site for remarriage. I received a call from an Sr. Scientist. I was serious about this because he was a nice educated fellow and working as scientist, his case of divorce was in process, which he told that it is going to over soon. After around two months talk over the phone I liked the person and I met him. I liked him, later I invited him at my place as well as I also visited his place we came close to each other physically. Every thing was going fine he shared so many things about his family and wife as well as I also shared. Everything was going on fine suddenly he changed his nature and started avoiding and ignoring me. He told me that I will bring you my home nicely. Now we have fought. I am telling home to meet face to face. he is threatening me and me that if you will meet me and co e toy place will ruin you. Now he is running from me and telling go away and blocked me from all social media. He has used me and left me after wasting my two years. I am at a juncture of life that after my daughter I will be alone. Now after this cheating i have got so scared that not able to belive on any one. What should I do? Should I meet him once at his place? Should I tell all story to his father? I feel depression and anxiety. What should I do pl suggest.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry to hear about the issues you are facing. You certainly did not deserve it. I suggest you hold your head high and do not contact him again. If he has blocked you and is trying to cut you out of his life, that's his loss. You are missing nothing losing a man like that. Count your blessings that you did not end up committing to him and bringing your daughter into the equation. Look at the bright side; you dodged a bullet.

There are plenty of kind and genuine men who would be lucky to partner up with you. Do not give up on love. Take your time; heal from this. I am sure it isn't easy to get back into the dating field and, on top of everything, have an experience like this. But this is just one man; everyone is not the same. You will surely find someone much better and worthy. As for what to do with him- just leave. Do not try to contact and do not take him back if he tries to come back. You deserve more.

Best Wishes!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 28, 2023

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Relationship
Hello, I am 41 year old professional. I had met my husband before marriage though social media 5 years back and thereafter maintaining distance relationship and meeting occasionally for 3 years we got married in 2021. It was a struggle for marriage as it was inter caste and inter religious marriage. Everything was smooth in relationship to the fact that I’m responsible for all financial matters as my husband has no job. He is still trying and looking for job. I didn’t mind much but would encourage him to get the job to be mentally and physically fit. Last year we went to his nephews marriage to his village. It was of 7 day programme. On second day I noticed him watching another women ( nephews mother’s sister who has 2 daughters) At that time I didn’t pay attention. After 2 days on a night function I saw my husband texting from far but he looked at that lady again. She also seemed to texting. I became suspicious. Later that night when he came to room I asked to show him his phone he was reluctant. I had to snatch his phone and I saw that he was texting the same lady and in that had asked her to meet her alone. and asking her where he can meet her. I gnashed cried and made a huge scene coz this was not what I had expected. He tried to convince that she was his girlfriend of past and suddenly after seeing her after sometime he only wanted to talk to her. I only asked her ... why alone? He had told me during dating that she had a girlfriend ( never told her identity) and that she has married and moved on. Feeling cheated I could not sleep but only cried that night and in the morning if we can return to our city. Programme had not finished but he agreed and we left. Since then that night and those days still haunt me ; thinking what didn’t I do to love him so much and in return we get cheated. I’m still with him, but mentally I still feel cheated and still am in doubt that he is in touch with her. I am not able to do my duties as part of my mind thinks he cheats me though I have confronted many times on this and he denies that he is not in touch with her Should I leave him or continue with this marriage? We still don’t have any baby.
Ans: Dear Vandana,
Clearly you are more into him than he is into you. Baby or no baby, he seems like someone who isn't going to be steady...what was the need to hide and plan a meeting and if the other lady has moved on, what is doing hanging around her?
And with no financial assurance and stability, he is only tuning his energies to external validation to 'up' his elf esteem...

Isn't it time you actually called him out for his wayward nature and his absolute reluctance to take on some responsibility in the marriage and home? The more you are quiet, the more he is going to feel that you are supporting this nonsense...call it out and NOW! And as for your state of mind, do know that you have it in you to hold your own...don't base you peace of mind on anything outside of you...

All the best!

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |405 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I got married three months ago, during courtship period my ex was in my office but then my marriage wasn't fixed properly ,when it got yeses from both the side I changed my office,but I couldn't tell this to my husband and also I lied about my virginity,he was also not virgin and after marriage I confessed all this ,now he is not forgiving me for my dishonesty and not letting me come home also he abuse me verbally ,slapped me..I also feel like cheated for not letting me know this side of him before marriage..How should I go ahead?
Ans: I'm truly sorry to hear about the difficulties you're facing in your new marriage. It's concerning to hear that you're experiencing verbal abuse and physical violence from your husband. No one deserves to be treated this way, and it's important to prioritize your safety and well-being.

First and foremost, if you are in immediate danger or feel unsafe, please reach out to local authorities or a trusted friend or family member for support. Your safety is paramount.

In terms of next steps, it's essential to seek support and assistance from professionals who can help you navigate this situation. Consider reaching out to a therapist or counselor who specializes in relationships and domestic violence. They can provide you with guidance, support, and resources to help you make informed decisions about your next steps.

Additionally, you may want to consider reaching out to organizations or hotlines that specialize in supporting individuals experiencing domestic violence. They can offer confidential support, safety planning, and resources to help you leave the abusive situation and rebuild your life.

It's also crucial to recognize that you are not responsible for your husband's abusive behavior, and you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect in your marriage. If your husband is unwilling to seek help or change his behavior, it may be necessary to consider your options for leaving the relationship to ensure your safety and well-being.

Leaving an abusive relationship can be challenging, but you don't have to face it alone. There are people and resources available to support you every step of the way. Please prioritize your safety and take steps to protect yourself from further harm. You deserve to live a life free from abuse and violence.

..Read more

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Pradeep

Pradeep Pramanik  |186 Answers  |Ask -

Career And Placement Consultant - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

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Career
I am looking for a job, I had uploaded my resume in job site. A consultant called me & introduced himself telling he know some of the openings. He had a detailed discussion about my job & my skills. He told need to register to his consultancy for scheduling interview. I registered with him & he got me a interview. Interview was done by the company through skype. I could not see the company persons. They told only they can see me. Interview went on well & regarding salary I told my expectation but they told it is not possible & they told their proposal. Finally I agreed to them. They gave me code & told to visit the company for next round. Consultant called me after first round & told recruiter is very happy with the interview. Regarding salary he told why I agreed for the proposal,he will discuss again & asked to pay charges for some of his services which he will refund the day I visit to the company & take the orders. I paid him. He told there is a increase in salary he has discussed with recruiter & again asked for the money I did only partial payment & further will not pay anything. Second round also happened through skype instead of in person. Interview went on well & salary offered was good comparing to before & there was a big jump. Recruiter told they have planned to give additional responsibilities so they have increased. Finally they gave me a date to visit company. I asked when will I get the order, he replied he will send to consultant as I was taken by them. Till now i did not get the orders, consultant is keep on postponing. Now he told visit to company date is also postponed, he will update in next week & not to worry as job is confirmed. Now not understanding what to do, am I been cheated or wait.
Ans: Dear Mr. Keshava ,

There are many unscruplous job agents who are fake and claim themselves to be a Placement consultant. In short You have been cheated . Before paying any fee for registration , you must ensure that the agency is genuine . If not don't even upload your resume . You may write to company , lodge a complaint against the agency. If the amount is very high , pl. take the help of police . .

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7097 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

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Money
I hv started sip in 2008 and still continued , now the monthly sip is 55k and total value is 1.85cr. Need to accumulate 7cr with in next 4 yrs pls guide how can i achieve. - Deepak J. Hajari
Ans: Deepak, your long-term SIP discipline is impressive. Accumulating Rs. 7 crore in 4 years is ambitious. Achieving this goal requires a strategic approach, as time is limited. Let's create an actionable plan for your success.

Current Financial Snapshot
Ongoing SIPs: Rs. 55,000 monthly.
Current Portfolio Value: Rs. 1.85 crore.
Target Corpus: Rs. 7 crore within 4 years.
Your consistent investing habits have built a solid foundation. However, to achieve your target, adjustments are needed.

Key Challenges
Short Time Frame: Four years is a limited period for aggressive wealth accumulation.
Significant Gap: A gap of Rs. 5.15 crore remains to meet the Rs. 7 crore goal.
Market Volatility: Equity investments might face short-term volatility.
Recommendations to Bridge the Gap
1. Increase Your SIP Contributions
Raise your SIP amount to Rs. 1.25 lakh per month.
This increase ensures faster wealth creation through compounding.
Prioritise high-growth funds in equity-oriented categories.
2. Invest Lump Sum Amounts
Consider deploying a lump sum if you have idle savings or low-yield investments.
Invest in aggressive equity mutual funds for higher potential returns.
Break down the lump sum into tranches for better market timing.
3. Diversify into High-Growth Mutual Funds
Focus on small-cap and mid-cap mutual funds for higher growth potential.
Maintain a balance with some large-cap exposure for stability.
Ensure the portfolio aligns with your high-return requirements.
4. Avoid Overexposure to Debt or Low-Yield Instruments
Limit debt investments during this aggressive growth phase.
Avoid instruments like FDs or debt mutual funds with lower returns.
Rely on equity for the next four years to maximise growth.
5. Rebalance Your Portfolio Regularly
Conduct a portfolio review every 6 months.
Reallocate funds based on underperforming or outperforming sectors.
Keep your portfolio aligned with market trends and your goals.
6. Capitalize on Bonus or Windfall Gains
Direct any bonuses, salary hikes, or windfall gains towards your target.
Avoid unnecessary expenses during this focused phase.
Tax Efficiency Matters
Equity Mutual Funds Taxation: Gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.
Debt Mutual Funds Taxation: Taxed as per your income slab.
Plan redemptions strategically to minimise tax liabilities.
Leverage Market Opportunities
Benefit from Market Corrections: Use corrections as opportunities to invest lump sums.
Stay Invested for Compounding: Avoid early redemptions to let compounding work fully.
Role of Regular Monitoring
Track Performance: Ensure funds are performing as per expectations.
Switch Funds if Needed: Shift from underperforming funds to high-growth options.
Final Insights
Deepak, achieving Rs. 7 crore in 4 years requires aggressive yet calculated strategies. Increase your SIPs, deploy lump sums, and focus on high-growth funds. Regular monitoring and disciplined investing are key to your success. Stay patient and consistent.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7097 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024Hindi
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Money
I am 50 yrs old. If I invest 60k per month for 10 yrs in SIPs of MF then will I be able to achieve the corpus of Rs. 2.50 Crs and if not how much shall I invest per month and in which SIP schemes
Ans: You have a clear goal to invest Rs. 60,000 per month for 10 years. The goal is to accumulate Rs. 2.5 crore through mutual fund SIPs. Let us analyse your query in detail and provide actionable insights.

Evaluating the Feasibility of Your Investment Plan
10-Year Time Frame:
Ten years is a medium-term horizon. Equity-based mutual funds offer good growth potential for this period.

Monthly SIP Contribution:
A SIP of Rs. 60,000 is significant. It shows your commitment to wealth creation.

Target Corpus Analysis:
The target of Rs. 2.5 crore depends on consistent returns. Market performance influences results.

Expected Returns:
Equity funds can give 10%-12% annualised returns in the long run. However, returns are not guaranteed.

Is Rs. 60,000 Sufficient?
Your current contribution may not be sufficient to reach Rs. 2.5 crore in 10 years.

For 10%-12% Returns:
You might accumulate Rs. 1.9–2.1 crore. There could be a shortfall of Rs. 40–60 lakh.

Solution:
Increase your SIP amount to Rs. 75,000–80,000 monthly for a better chance of achieving the goal.

Optimising Your SIP Contributions
Step-Up SIPs:
Increase your SIP amount by 5%-10% every year. This adjusts for inflation and higher earnings.

Lump Sum Boost:
If you have surplus funds, invest a lump sum. This accelerates your goal.

Diversify Investments:
Allocate across equity and hybrid funds for balanced growth and risk management.

Selecting the Right SIP Investments
Actively managed funds are suitable for your goals. Avoid index funds due to their limitations.

Equity Funds for Growth:
These funds have high growth potential over 10 years.

Diversified Portfolio:
Choose funds across large-cap, mid-cap, and multi-cap categories. This spreads risk effectively.

Hybrid Funds:
Hybrid funds provide stability by balancing equity and debt investments.

Avoiding Direct Funds
Investing through direct funds might seem cost-effective but has drawbacks.

Limited Guidance:
Direct funds lack professional advice. This could lead to suboptimal fund choices.

Benefits of Regular Plans:
A Certified Financial Planner ensures proper fund selection and portfolio review.

Managing Tax Implications
Understanding taxation helps optimise your returns.

Long-Term Gains:
LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%. Plan redemptions strategically.

Short-Term Gains:
STCG on equity is taxed at 20%. Avoid frequent withdrawals to minimise this tax.

Hybrid Funds Taxation:
Gains from hybrid funds are taxed as per your income slab.

Steps to Achieve Rs. 2.5 Crore
Increase SIP Amount:
Raise your SIP to Rs. 75,000–80,000 monthly.

Review Annually:
Monitor portfolio performance and adjust investments.

Use a Balanced Strategy:
Combine equity funds with hybrid funds to optimise risk and return.

Seek Professional Help:
Work with a Certified Financial Planner to refine your plan.

Final Insights
Your goal of Rs. 2.5 crore in 10 years is achievable with adjustments. Increase your SIP amount and maintain discipline. Diversify investments and periodically review the portfolio. A Certified Financial Planner can guide you for maximum efficiency and clarity.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7097 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 19, 2024Hindi
Money
Im a 34 year old, my father is planning on selling a property from which he would provide me with a gift of 1 Crore. At the moment , since my business has not launched, I would like to be earning interest from the Corpus amount and would also like to have a withdrawal of around 40-50K per month. Im very new to investing, and all i know is , getting half baked answers just isnt worth it. So im asking the experts, what is a realistic return that I could hope for? Provided its invested into mutual funds and debt funds. I would like to protect the corpus and make it grow while also trying to a withdrawal of 50-k per month.
Ans: Firstly, it's fantastic that you're approaching your investment decisions with a clear goal in mind. Receiving a gift of Rs 1 Crore from your father is a significant opportunity. Your desire to earn regular income while protecting and growing the principal corpus is a smart approach, especially given the current stage of your business. Let’s explore a realistic strategy for achieving your goal of monthly withdrawals while ensuring long-term growth.

Key Objectives
Preserve the Corpus: Ensuring the Rs 1 Crore grows steadily and does not erode.
Generate Monthly Income: Aiming for Rs 40,000–50,000 monthly withdrawals to meet your cash flow needs.
Balanced Risk: A mix of investments in mutual funds and debt funds to balance growth with security.
Types of Funds to Consider
To achieve your objectives, the portfolio needs to include a mix of debt and equity mutual funds. Here’s an overview of each option:

1. Debt Funds (Low-Risk)
Debt funds are ideal for stability. They typically offer steady returns with lower volatility. These funds invest in bonds, government securities, and corporate debt.

Stability: They offer relatively stable returns with low risk to the principal.
Monthly Income: Debt funds with monthly income plans (MIPs) can provide regular payouts.
Expected Returns: Historically, debt funds return 7-9% annually, depending on the type and tenure of the bonds they invest in.
2. Equity Mutual Funds (Moderate to High-Risk)
Equity funds invest in stocks and can offer higher returns, but with more volatility. Over the long term, they have the potential to outperform debt funds, though there can be short-term fluctuations.

Growth Potential: Equity funds are essential for capital appreciation.
Risk Profile: Equity mutual funds carry more risk but can provide higher long-term returns.
Expected Returns: Historically, equity funds can offer 10-15% returns per annum, depending on market conditions and fund management.
Expected Return and Withdrawal Strategy
Given your goal of withdrawing Rs 40,000–50,000 monthly (Rs 4.8–6 lakh annually), let’s assess a realistic return scenario:

1. Required Returns for Monthly Withdrawal
To generate Rs 4.8–6 lakh annually, you need to have a combination of income and growth.
Assumption: You need a mix of debt and equity funds. If you target an average return of 8-9% per annum from debt and equity, your portfolio should generate enough income.
2. Risk-Return Balance
Debt Funds: These funds will give stability and a guaranteed income, but at a lower return rate.
Equity Funds: These can help grow your corpus and offer a better chance of increasing the monthly withdrawal amount over time.
3. Potential Returns Based on Allocation
50% Debt Funds: Target return of 7-8% annually.
50% Equity Funds: Target return of 12-14% annually.
This balanced approach provides income and growth, helping you meet your withdrawal goal while maintaining long-term growth.

Portfolio Structure Suggestions
1. Debt Fund Allocation (50%)
Why Debt?: Debt funds offer lower risk and more predictable returns, making them suitable for generating a steady income.
Types of Debt Funds to Consider:
Corporate Bond Funds: These offer better returns than government bond funds, but at slightly higher risk.
Short-Term Debt Funds: These funds invest in short-term instruments and are less sensitive to interest rate changes.
Monthly Income Plans (MIPs): These funds are specifically designed to provide monthly payouts, offering an income stream.
2. Equity Fund Allocation (50%)
Why Equity?: Equity funds will provide higher returns and help your corpus grow over time. They are necessary for long-term wealth creation.
Types of Equity Funds to Consider:
Large-Cap Funds: These invest in well-established companies with a stable growth record.
Flexi-Cap Funds: These funds invest across all market caps, allowing flexibility to choose the best opportunities.
Hybrid Funds: A mix of debt and equity, hybrid funds are suitable for balancing risk and return.
Tax Considerations for Your Portfolio
Mutual fund investments are subject to taxes on the capital gains.

Equity Funds:
Long-Term Capital Gains (LTCG): If held for more than 1 year, LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.
Short-Term Capital Gains (STCG): If sold within 1 year, STCG is taxed at 15%.
Debt Funds:
LTCG: If held for more than 3 years, debt fund gains are taxed at 20% with indexation benefits.
STCG: If sold within 3 years, gains are taxed according to your income tax slab.
You should plan your withdrawals in a way that balances both income generation and tax efficiency.

Risk Management and Capital Preservation
Your focus on preserving the corpus is essential. While debt funds provide safety, equity funds add the potential for capital appreciation. To protect your capital:

Diversify Across Different Asset Classes: Ensure a mix of debt, equity, and hybrid funds.
Review Portfolio Regularly: Market conditions change, and it’s important to keep your portfolio aligned with your risk tolerance and financial goals.
Avoid Overconcentration: Don’t put all your funds into one type of asset. Spread your investments across sectors and instruments.
Steps to Implement Your Strategy
1. Choose Mutual Funds Through an MFD with CFP Credentials
Why?: Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) ensures your investments are aligned with your long-term goals and risk profile.
Avoid Direct Funds: While direct funds have lower expense ratios, you miss out on valuable advisory support. An MFD offers curated fund selection, tax advice, and regular portfolio reviews.
2. Start with a 50-50 Debt-Equity Split
Debt: Focus on short-term and MIPs for income generation.
Equity: Invest in large-cap or flexi-cap funds for long-term growth.
3. Monitor and Rebalance
Rebalance your portfolio annually based on market performance and changing needs.
Adjust debt and equity allocations depending on your withdrawal requirements and market conditions.
Final Insights
With Rs 1 Crore, you can generate enough income for your monthly withdrawals while allowing your money to grow. A balanced approach of 50% debt funds and 50% equity funds is a realistic strategy to achieve this. Your investment portfolio will ensure that you have both stability and growth, helping you meet your cash flow needs while protecting and growing your corpus.

It's crucial to engage with a Certified Financial Planner to tailor the investment strategy to your exact needs. Their expertise will help you make better decisions for both tax efficiency and long-term wealth creation.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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