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Shalini Singh |188 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating Coach - Answered on Jun 15, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 13, 2026

I am having issues with fake faces, promises, hidden goals in relationships. i feel like a failure for not being fit in, its difficult to share that i feel cheated or dumped in every single relationship i have today. is this only i am the problem or it is what it is ??

Ans: You may not like my response - the issue is
- you are choosing wrong
- you dont love yourself enough and seek external validation.

Change both and see the difference. There is guidance service if you wish to invest in to improve your life choices - https://andwemet.com/relationship-guidance

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 08, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 11, 2026Hindi

My wife is very active socially and often gets appreciation or small awards at different events and functions. Whenever something good happens, she gets genuinely excited and always makes an effort to share that happiness with her family. She never goes empty-handed - she'll take sweets or snacks for everyone, happily explain what happened at the event, who appreciated her work, and all the small details with excitement. But what I've observed is that her family - especially her brothers and elder sister - mostly just listen quietly, eat the sweets, and move on. They don't really ask questions, show curiosity, appreciate her efforts, or even casually discuss it later. There's no excitement, no proud reaction, not even simple comments like 'well done' or 'how did it happen?' Sometimes it feels emotionally very flat from their side. I personally feel bad seeing this because my wife genuinely values family support and always includes them in her happy moments. I can't understand whether this is just their nature, jealousy, emotional reserve, or simply the way some families behave without openly expressing appreciation. How should someone deal with this kind of silent response from close family members?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Why are you jumping to her defense? Did your wife mention that she is bothered by it? Each person and their family dynamics are unique...maybe you come from a family where everyone is very expressive and her side of the family are muted about sharing.
To each his/her own; if you start looking at it through a magnifying lens, it's always going to look alarmingly insane.
Unless your wife feels bad about it, let it be and let it go...
If she does mention that she wants to do something about it, step into it and suggest that she clearly mentions to her family how she feels and what she would like as a response from them instead.
Life gets easier to sail through once we learn to accept people for who they are rather than expect them to turn the world over and change which anyway isn't going to happen, yeah?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 08, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 20, 2026

Hi health expert, I have been struggling with severe health anxiety for many years now. I am currently in my mid-40s and I think this started after a traumatic experience around 10–12 years ago. We had gone on a family vacation and shortly after returning my uncle fell seriously ill. After diagnosis we found out he had advanced stage cancer and we lost him within a few months. The shock of that experience affected me deeply and ever since then I have lived with an intense fear of cancer and serious illness. Even small things like a stomach ache, a pimple, swelling, fever, or any unusual sensation trigger extreme fear in me. I immediately start thinking the worst and it causes sleepless nights and constant worry. This has seriously affected my quality of life. Along with the anxiety, my OCD symptoms also become very intense during these phases. It feels like there’s a voice in my head constantly telling me to perform certain rituals like praying immediately, drinking water at a specific moment, not switching off the AC, or doing random actions “or else” something bad will happen. It becomes mentally exhausting, and at times I struggle to function normally in my daily routine. I have consulted several psychiatrists and psychologists over the years, but I still feel unhappy and stuck. I am reaching out here to ask if anyone has experienced something similar or found anything that genuinely helped whether coping techniques, home remedies, calming practices, or anything else that brought some peace and stability. Basically I am looking for some home remedy and also want to check is this something rare or they are people who goi through this.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Health anxiety is not abnormal but it can rob you of a good quality life and when it starts to eat into your mind and keep you stuck in a loop constantly, you need to take action.
Your nervous system is on a hyper vigilant mode that perceives a small burp as a major threat sending you into a survival mode. This will keep you in an endless loop of worry, researching symptoms, anxious over the smallest things; everything will feel heightened. Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) is known to treat this very well; you can seek a therapist in your area to guide you through this challenge.
In the meantime, you can try the following at home:
- every time you feel your heart beating heavily or mind racing, resort to breathing from the diaphragm (2 mins; don't force the breaths, let it be as easy as it can be - if you begin to feel uneasy STOP immediately)
- journal your thoughts and write down your worst fears and breathe again reassuring yourself that it happened to your uncle and that does not mean it will happen to you as well
- practice the attitude of gratitude and write down 5 things that you are grateful for every night before going to bed
- the next time there's a thought that you are about to loop into, do 10 jumping jacks or splash cold water on your face; this attempts to distract you and reset your nervous system
- surround yourself with people who are usually cheerful and carry a positive mindset

You are either the master of your mind OR you get enslaved by it; you have experienced the latter...for once, try taking charge and see how you can master it and live peacefully. It requires mind training and it's possible with consistent efforts.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 08, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 13, 2026Hindi

My husband is having an affair with a woman from his gym for over a year now. I started suspecting it when I started noticing small changes in him. He is 47 and he suddenly became very conscious about his looks. I pushed him to join a gym and soon he started spending extra time. I helped him buy new clothes but now he is glued to his phone. I thought he was focusing on fitness and health. Slowly, he started ignoring me. Our talks reduced, he would get irritated if I asked him something. He started dressing up and hiding stuff from me. When I confronted him, he admitted he had become close to a younger woman from the gym. But what hurt the most was when he said that being with her makes him feel younger. I was shocked he said this after 17 years of our marriage. We have a 15 year old daughter. This woman from the gym is 23. I have seen her on Instagram. Does this mean our marriage is over? Should I speak to the woman as well?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It says more about your husband than you; the man short of his 50s needs validation from girls in their early 20s to feed his ego...On her part, she's possibly just getting a 'fatherly' protective instinct from him and the attention on both sides is being misinterpreted as 'attraction'.
Most likely, it will fall by the side soon when she finds a younger guy and in case it doesn't, time to take your husband to task...he needs a reality check; just send a male member of the family to the gym at the same time. Men like your husband are very worried about their image and will get the message loud and clear.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 11, 2026Hindi

Hello I am 49 years old male I don't know if I am suffering from high level anxiety or not sure what it is I am also suffering from high blood pressure and high blood sugar level but unable to control and get medical check up due to financial issues. I am unemployed for almost 2 years and I think of some incident and as if I am having a argument with argument and cannot conclude that imagination until I get exhausted and sweat. especially while sleeping then I imagine other incident which makes me really talk to myself whisper loudly and I don't know why it keeps happening to me and also have habit of looking at the mirror a lot I really don't know what it is it how to become normal.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Mind and Body work in perfect tandem to either keep you unhealthy or healthy.
So, by not doing a few tests, your mind is constantly in the anxiety loop and that's again going to make you ill. Blood Pressure is just a walk in routine check with a general practitioner of Medicine which does not cost a lot and so is a test to determine how much are your blood sugar levels through a simple blood test. Get it done and get medicines if required and notice how quickly your mind settles as your body gets taken care of.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 24, 2026

My partner and I are very different when it comes to hobbies and interests. For example, I enjoy going out, exploring new places, meeting people, and trying new activities, while my partner prefers staying at home, watching movies, or just relaxing quietly. In the beginning, these differences didn’t bother me much, but now I sometimes feel like we don’t have enough in common to spend quality time together. There are moments when I want to do something exciting, but I end up going alone or compromising, and that makes me wonder if this gap will grow bigger over time. At the same time, I also understand that everyone has their own personality and preferences. So I’m confused is it actually okay for partners to have completely different hobbies and interests, or is having common activities important for a strong and long-term relationship?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Yeah, it's absolutely okay for two partners in a relationship to be widely different in their likes and dislikes. They key lies in how you bridge that gap.
Is this by highlighting how different you are and feel upset by it OR recognizing those differences and finding things to do in common?
Usually, I would suggest having an open communication where the two of you respectfully agree that you are different but will make the effort to spend time doing things together. And it's also okay to do your own things during the week and get together of the weekends to do stuff that both of you enjoy. You could also agree that one weekend you spend time at home and do stuff that your partner like and the next weekend you two do what you like by going out.
It's about bridging that gap respectfully and politely; it works!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 11, 2026

Whenever I plan a family trip or even a simple one-day outing, my wife somehow ends up suggesting a temple visit as the main destination. I understand faith is important to her, and I respect that completely, but honestly I get a little frustrated because almost every trip starts feeling more like a religious visit than an actual break or vacation. Sometimes I just want to relax, explore new places, enjoy food, nature, or spend light-hearted time together without following a temple-focused schedule all the time. Even if I suggest a hill station, beach, resort, or short leisure drive, she'll usually try to include a famous temple nearby and make that the priority. After a point, I've started losing excitement while planning trips because I already know where the conversation will go. I don't want to hurt her feelings or disrespect her beliefs, but I also wish my idea of a relaxing holiday was considered equally important. How do couples balance different expectations like spirituality versus leisure when planning family outings?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Rather than having trips that cover only either/or, why don't you plan one that combine both...that way both of you are happy. Finish the temple visits first and then go and have a relaxed time by the mountains and oceans.
If this entails a long holiday and is hard to do, then have a conversation that you alternate between temples and leisure holidays.
There's always a mid-point, you know! And to accommodate each others' preferences is what makes for a happy holiday time...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 11, 2026

Recently a new girl joined our office - she's around 25, very stylish, confident, and has that typical Gen Z vibe. Ever since she joined, the whole office atmosphere feels different. Suddenly many people are finding reasons to come to our department just to talk to her or casually hang around near her desk pretending they have some work. Even some colleagues who normally never visit our section have started appearing regularly. What I've also noticed is that many colleagues and like-minded ladies in the office have become very attached to her socially - lots of gossip, laughing, group conversations, and attention around her all the time. Personally, this whole behaviour around one person feels a bit irritating and immature to me. At the same time, somewhere I also feel odd because she doesn't really respond much to my jokes or conversations the way she does with certain others. It almost feels like she selectively interacts only with people she considers 'high class' or matching her vibe. I know nobody is obligated to connect with everyone in office, but why do situations like this sometimes affect us emotionally even when we know it's not a big issue logically? Is it more about ego, attention, workplace dynamics, or feeling socially ignored?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
This is to do more with you than the new girl who has joined.
You seem to be affected by this emotionally whereas the others seem to have happily accepted the situation. Maybe it's time to think:
- Am I jealous that that new girl has suddenly come in and become popular?
- Do I feel left out that I don't get the same kind of attention that she does?
She possibly does not respond to you much as conversations are a two way street; when you expect to be acknowledged, you also learn to first acknowledge the other person. It's quite possible that you body language depicts the jealousy or insecurities...
Time for a reality check?
Rather than being intimidated by her, why don't you get to know her? Being curious about someone actually not just makes the other person comfortable but also keeps you in a better mind space of owning your space rather than guarding it this way. try it!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 03, 2026Hindi

My son's girlfriend wants to separate him from us. He is 21 and is just out of college but she is making him dance to her tunes. I usually don't interfere in my son's relationships until he tells me about it or wants to discuss something. A few months ago he said he met this girl on a dating app and since then he has been acting all weird. He's started smoking, going to late night parties and when I intervened, he decided to move out. He wants me to sign his rent agreement which I have put on hold because he does not have a job yet. I am a single mother and I am not ready to pay for this. Now he has blocked me and is staying with this new girl and her friends. Should I be worried or wait for him to come back when he feels right to talk to me? I hope he doesn't end up doing something illegal to make money. I don't want to lose my son. What am I doing wrong? How can i fix this?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
He's just using this girl to escape from home and responsibilities at home...he's 21 and does not earn and has moved in with this girl; do you not feel that he's jumped way ahead of his capabilities?
In this case, you may have to take the risk of letting him figure this out on his own. The pitfalls may very well be that he may get into illegal ways of making money and risk his future as well. But what else can you do when a 21-year old acts irresponsibly?
One option that I can think of is: have a senior male member of the family talk to him, patiently and for an extended period of time to soften this irrational behavior that he is displaying. When he softens a bit, you may want to approach him and make him understand.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2026

Question by Gundoji - Apr 13, 2026Hindi

Iam a girl we are charys my boy is SC we are about 8 years ago relationship first my boy proposed me after I Complete my intermediate then first I said to my brother only he proposed me I also have crush on him if I want to marry anyone that's the person like him only I really respects him like I said to my brother .then my brother says no ma in our family we can't accept that intercaste so you have feelings on him I know but you have to live and do focus on your carrier he said tome. But I can't when Iam chatting with my boy him I avoid him and I says forget me but he says I cant live without you. And when Everytimes Iam chatting with my boy I said to my brother and beaten up by my brother . And exact 3 years back my parents are searching I feel my body is shivering with matches so I can't control my self so I decided to say to my parents but my parents how can receive I can't know so Iam full of fear full off tears and at a time my love so I open up to my parentsI love someone he is in SC caste but we don't do without your acceptance we have to marry with your acceptance only is said my parents then my parents says we are die because of you our family respects our image what will happen we die they says like that... So next again and again after I take some months time I try again and again I beaten up by my parents but they can't accept our love and says they die . They still searching matches for me , but Iam still loving my boy there is no help Iam 26 age I don't have any job my family don't agree do job Iam in home and my boy is doing job private ..I ask him once to ask my parents about our marriage he says Like this with his small job how can I ask ma ...if I ask and I ask give time to carrier to good settle this like my boy said to me. But Iam again and again tried but my parents are says wee are die. And search matches to me I can't handle my situation ...my boy now says understand our parents dont agree for marriage how much he loves me support me I know and how he stands for me in my low I know. Now because of my parents he is replied me slowly but Iam feeling pain

Ans: Dear Gundoji,
I am still confused; does your boyfriend want to be married to you or not...if he is backing out, there is little that you can do!
If the two of you are serious about marriage, 2 things must be achieved before that:
1. Your boyfriend has to get involved in managing your family's expectations
2. You start to find a way to get financially independent

When these two points are taken care of, there is little opposition that you may face and even if you do, it will be handled better by both of you.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jun 01, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 25, 2026Hindi

Ihave been in a relationship with a guy for the past 2 years. He is preparing for his CA final exams and has also completed his articleship during this time. We both genuinely love each other, and he has always shared his routine and everything about his studies with me. However, his CA final exam is in May, and since November 2025, our communication has reduced a lot. We only had very basic conversations. This month, he told me that he wants to take a break from using his phone until his exams are over, and that he will talk properly after that. I understood that and respected his decision. But for the last 25 days, we haven’t texted or called at all. From January to March, we at least used to say good morning and good night, but now even that has stopped. I feel like he could at least send a small text like that, even during exams. I also didn’t disturb him much myself. What is bothering me is that I noticed he is still using Instagram. He has liked some reels and posts of his friends. He hasn’t posted anything himself, but when I uploaded a story, he didn’t even see it, and he didn’t like my post either. Because of this, I’ve been feeling rejected and anxious. I’m scared that after his exams, he might leave me or that the spark between us might be gone. I really love him, so this is affecting me a lot. He is not using Snapchat, but I can clearly see his activity on Instagram. So now I’m confused—if he has time to use Instagram, why doesn’t he have time to talk to me? I don’t know what to do. Is this a red flag, or should I just wait until his exams are over?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It doesn't automatically raises red flags but yes, your concerns are valid and understandable. CA exams are tough and takes complete attention but a single good morning or good night text takes a second, or even a five minutes phone call can be made. Many people withdraw from everything to focus on the exams but since he is active on instagram, it does raise some concerns. However, scrolling for a bit is not as much mental commitment as talking to your partner. All said, I can totally understand your feelings. However, I would urge you to bear with it till his exams are over and see where things are going. I know you want to confront him right away but if that affects his exams, you would feel very guilty. Even if he doesn't perform upto mark and your confrontation had nothing to do with his results, you'll still feel guilty. I know it's tough but just bear with it a little longer. After the exams are over, seeing how things between the two of you are going, have an open conversation and tell him how you felt at that point and allow him to explain. Please don't jump to conclusions right away.

Hope this helps

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jun 01, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 23, 2026Hindi

My boss stalks my social media. I have politely declined his request on social media. I even blocked him but he tries to send me new requests from different accounts. He acts very different in office and casually flirts with me, comments on my pictures and status on social media. How do I tell him off without affecting my job?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that it can be tricky to handle this situation because of the power dynamics, but you don't need to justify your boundaries to your boss. Just keep it professional and if he ever asks why you did not accept his request, answer with a direct, "I prefer keeping my personal and professional life separate." This should make it clear to him that you do not wish to bring him into your personal life. If he continues to make you uncomfortable, document the interactions and take the matter to HR. I know you have a lot to lose here, but understand that so does he. You should not give him the upperhand.

Hope this helps.

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 25, 2026

Question by Chandni - May 20, 2026Hindi

Sir/Ma’am, I am 19 years old and currently in a relationship, but things between us are not going well. We fight very often, sometimes even over very small matters. I feel that maybe both of us had too many expectations from each other, and we both have a lot of ego and anger. The person I am dating has significant anger issues. I try to stay calm and handle things from my side, but after a point, it becomes difficult for me too. Sometimes, during arguments, he gets very angry and even uses abusive language, which hurts me a lot. Recently, we had another serious fight, and our conversations often reach the point of breaking up. Lately, the relationship feels very toxic to me, and sometimes I feel like giving up and ending everything because it has become emotionally exhausting. I am feeling very confused and would really appreciate some guidance on what I should do.

Ans: Dear Chandni,
I understand that you are going through a tough time. I get that you want to save the relationship because you have worked so hard to build it from scratch, but with this much conflicts right now itself, especially with a partner who has anger issues, the chances of maintaining a healthy relationship is very slim, unless both of you decide to change things drastically. You are both very young. These are the best years of your life. It's not the time to be spent in sadness and so much burden. If a relationship makes you so emotionally exhausted, is it worth pursuing? Even if you love each other, peace and respect is very important. You are too young to understand that. I would suggest rethinking this relationship.

Best Wishes.

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 15, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 13, 2026Hindi

My husband often lies about small things just to avoid arguments. For example, he says he was busy at work when he actually went out with friends. There are so many times I would tell him to remind his mother or talk to her about something, he will forget and later say he just didn’t want to do it. These may not seem big but it is causing a lot of issues at home. When I find out from someone else, I become a laughing matter. Even if he says something, I have to double check. I don't trust him any more. How to explain this to him?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand your situation can be tiring. It might seem trivial but when it keeps piling up, it gets emotionally exhausting for the person who is on the receiving end of this. Repeated half truths can make a person feel emotionally unsafe in the long term and trust and comfort are key aspects of a healthy marriage. Maybe his intent is not malicious, he still needs to understand that it is not fair to you. Here is what I suggest: let him know that the issue is not the small lies, but the feeling it creates for you. When you find out the truth from someone else, it embarrasses you and breaks your heart that you don't know things about your husband that others do. This pattern makes it difficult for you to trust things that he says. Along with expressing your emotions, acknowledge them too. See if you react negatively when he says he wants to hangout with friends; I am not blaming you here, but introspection is the only way to understand where this behavior is stemming from. Let him know that you do not want yourself to turn into a detective trying to decode everything. You want plain honesty. Clear communication can help a lot. Start from here.

Best Wishes.

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Dr Upneet Kaur |83 Answers |Ask -Follow

Marriage counsellor - Answered on May 14, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 11, 2026Hindi

I went through a divorce around three years ago, and along with the marriage ending, I also lost daily connection with my son. At that time I genuinely tried everything possible to save the relationship and solve issues peacefully, but nothing worked out in the end. It took me a long time just to emotionally accept what happened. Now my parents are constantly pressuring me to get married again. Their main point is that my ex-wife has already moved on and remarried, so they feel I should also 'settle down' and restart life. I understand their concern, and somewhere I know they want me to be happy, but emotionally I still feel stuck between the past and the future. A part of me misses my son deeply, another part fears going through emotional pain again, and at the same time I also don’t want to spend life completely alone. How does someone genuinely know they are mentally ready for a second marriage after a painful divorce and separation from a child? Is it wrong if healing is taking longer than what family members expect

Ans: Hello sir..I hope you are in good health. Sir, divorce actually is a very painful process. To accept it and to move is not easy. I completely understand your situation. And there is no fixed timing for a person to heal. It may take long duration to get out of that trauma. But sir, to come out of it is in your hands. I m not saying that choosing another partner will definitely solve your problems. You can choose another ways to overcome the feelings and pain you are dealing with. You can go for regular counsellings, meditation, yoga, you can persue any of your hobbies. This will relax your mind and you will start healing. After that you can take whatever decision you want to take but fir that also fix a timeline for yourself as our brain is trained to work according to the timelines. I hope this will help you.
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on:
https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 12, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 08, 2026Hindi

I recently started dating my girlfriend, and naturally I wanted her to feel special and comfortable, so I've been spending quite a lot on outings, gifts, food, cabs, and small surprises - almost like treating her like a princess. I genuinely enjoy doing these things, but at the same time I'm also starting to worry about my own finances and limited pocket money. Sometimes I even end up borrowing money from friends just to keep up the same level of spending. Now I'm confused because I don't want the relationship to become too dependent on money or expensive treatment from my side. I also have a small fear in my mind - what if she slowly gets used to this lifestyle and keeps expecting the same all the time? How do I maintain a healthy balance between being caring and generous in a relationship while also staying financially practical and not putting pressure on myself?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It is great that you have been spoiling your girlfriend with gifts, outings, etc. I am sure she appreciates them. But in a healthy relationship, the material things matter less than the effort and thought you are putting behind them. If you are in a solid relationship, your partner won't mind even if you are not giving her expensive gifts or taking her out to expensive restaurants. Moreover, what you are feeling right now is a healthy realization. Couples often confuse the initial bonding as something that needs constant spending of money. That does make your partner happy, but that is not exactly what makes her fall in love with you.

Now realistically, the biggest sign that your approach needs adjustment is that it's getting heavy on your pockets and you are borrowing money to keep up the experience. This is where it needs to be checked because this approach is not sustainable. Relationships are about emotional safety and comfort, not a financial performance. Too many expensive gestures can lead a couple to lose sight of the actual connection. Here's a healthier balance: cut down on the luxury; instead of an expensive restaurant, go for a cup of tea, maybe. See how she responds to the scaling down. If it really affects your relationship, it was never strong to last. Ideally, it should not matter. Don't build romance on financial stress. Moreover, if she ever mentions that you don't do the grand things you once did, it doesn't immediately mean she is materialistic. Sudden cutdown can feel like losing attention. Just communicate the financial aspect of it honestly. Let her know that as much as you loved doing them for her, it was really difficult to maintain, but are still doing everything but maybe in a smaller scale that fits your budget. There's nothing wrong in that, please remember that.

Hope this helps.

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 08, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 05, 2026Hindi

My biggest college crush is now my bf. But I'm not happy. He used to be this hot basketball player everyone wanted to date. I was 3 years his junior so I fancied him a lot. When I asked him out on a date, he asked me to wait till I graduate. When I started dating him, I realised he is just an ordinary guy. Except for his height and basketball skills, there is nothing so great about him that I want to continue or know about him. Our conversations are mostly like 'Good morning' 'Did you eat?' 'How was your day?' 'Good night.' It's been less than a year and I am already bored of this relationship. Is there something wrong with me? What should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand your concern. Usually, when we have a crush on someone, we idolize them. We barely know them besides their physical traits and some common knowledge. It is entirely possible that besides that, there is nothing compatible between us and them. If you are interested in continuing the relationship, you might have to put in the effort to find common grounds between the two of you and understand that you put him on a pedestal, and it's okay to be ordinary. If you think it's too much work and you are not attracted to him anymore, the best way is to respectfully leave. Dragging something till it gets bitter is no way to go about it. Please take your time and think about it.

Best wishes

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 08, 2026

Question by Priyadarshi - May 05, 2026Hindi

Hello sir, I am in It head positioning in ming company. This is about my real-life problem sharing with you.I have a beautiful and working wife. Also 2 growing sons.1 is 15 yrs another is 5 yrs.when my little son borne nobody is there to taking care of him.My wife requested onf of distance relatiove please help us.She agreed to send her middle daughter who was 22 yrs at that time.She came & take care of my little son along with us.Their family background was not good.So we help their family in fanicaily also standing with them in every sitautaion.Our both family was good term at that time.Slowly she came to close my heart.We share each other very personal things each other.Due to my wife working in govt school we share very much time mentally & physically each other.Every situation she stands with me and my family.Even my wife not have doubt us.because she has very much faith us.After 4 years their family told us we are looking a boy for her and she will going to marriage to him.That girl told us she will will nt left me& cried.I told him have a family I can’t keep you as my wife.But our relationship will stay forvever.You please agree in this proposal. After so many conversation she agreed. We both husband & wife give her family & her like financially & demand from bride home.After her marriage she called me 5-6 times a day we talked we laughed we cried etc etc.But after some days some misunderstanding situation created which give us stop talking with her.So my wife was not talking with her.But loves her as a elder syster.But after another some days due to my negligency my wife caught some my personal chat both of us.My wife cried and cried due to so many faith of us.she send some chat to that girl.I make my wife understand that it was my mistake and will never repeat again.I stopped talk to her but she tried to talk with me but I avoide some time.I have all accees with her mail,insta,fb.After 1 month I checked her insta ,she is keeping busy with another guy with her village area whom I know her before.I had warning before some years that you keep distance from him,I have broken inside with heavy heart.i cried ,I have given every thing to her but she betrayed me. She cheat me even her husband.I have so many evidence against her.she knows everything.so she threatening you will vanished.you will be finished.I have also told her same language.But I love her .I cheat my wife family for her.I want to forget her and my memory with her.Please help me,how do I recover.

Ans: Dear Priyadarshi,
I understand that you are heartbroken, but from an ethical point of view, you stand equally guilty. Imagine how exactly your wife must be feeling. I want to console you but I am not sure how. At this point, all I can say is put your focus on your wife, the mother of your children and your actual family. If your marriage seems weak, go for couple's counseling, or else leave things respectfully. What's happening right now is extremely disrespectful to all parties, and I urge you to also ensure that your children don't get dragged into this. Please focus on your family.

Best wishes.

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Dr Upneet Kaur |83 Answers |Ask -Follow

Marriage counsellor - Answered on May 07, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 24, 2026Hindi

I’ve noticed that I tend to overthink almost everything my partner says or does, even when it’s something small. For example, if their tone sounds slightly different on a call or if they reply late to a message, I immediately start wondering if something is wrong or if I’ve upset them. Even a short or casual reply makes me replay the conversation again and again in my head, trying to find hidden meanings. Because of this, I sometimes end up feeling anxious or upset without any clear reason, and later I realize I might have overreacted. It’s becoming mentally exhausting and also affecting how I behave with my partner. I don’t want to keep doubting or overanalyzing every little thing, but I’m finding it hard to stop this pattern. How do I control this habit of overthinking and learn to take things more normally in a relationship?

Ans: Hello mam..i hope you are in the best spirits of your health. Mam, overthinking is a very common thing these days and it really affects one's life. As you said that you are having this habit of overthinking and it is affecting your life and your relationships too. There are lot of ups and downs in any relationship, and overthinking worsens it. Here are some tips that you can follow for overthinking.

01. Acceptance: Accept and label that you are overthinking and say it loud. Then give yourself a 5 min timeline to overthink. That's all. After that no overthinking. Soon your mind will get trained.

02. Practice Mindfulness: Ask your mind to comeback in present the very moment you feel that you are overthinking. Shift your focus on practical things like your phone charging, changing tv channel, doing hobby or activity which interests you.

03. Journaling: Shift your thoughts on a paper. It really helps to de-fog your mind and then thinking will be more logical and clear.

04. Box breathing - On the count of 4 inhale, on the count for 4 hold your breath and on the count of 4 exhale.

Don't take everything to your heart. Have confidence in yourself. Don't think that you have done anything wrong. Overthinking can happen to anyone but important is how to control that.

I hope this helps you. Have a great day..Thank you !

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 05, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 04, 2026Hindi

Hi i am 45 yo married lady with 2 kids. My husband had many sextual issues since marrige and my kids also are from donor ivf. He has been very rough in this marriage journey and a muser person despite having so much. I recwntly have developed feelings for an employee in my office and have been intimate with hi. He though clearly states yhat he would stop relation with me once he gets married. I feel very ashamed of myself. How should i stop this relationship?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
First of all, it's great that you are choosing to speak about it; it can't be easy to deal with so much all alone. Yes, being with someone else while married to another person is not ethically correct, but your situation is more nuanced than anyone can understand. Right now, the best course of action will be to sever ties with this person and focus on yourself. Being with someone else will not fill the void that your marriage is creating in your life. It will only leave you feeling more empty and guilty. I strongly suggest having an open discussion with your husband. Seek professional help of a marriage counselor. If the marriage seems salvageable, work on it, or else, get out of it respectfully, instead of cheating and hurting each other.

Please don't undervalue yourself so much that you allow yourself to be someone's "temporary." You deserve much more than that.

Best wishes.

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 04, 2026

Question by hiten - Apr 30, 2026Hindi

Madam Ji since last 3 yrs meand my wife r not on good terms hardly talk each other i feel she has go phobia for me it gives me stres pl advise Thanks

Ans: Dear Hiten,
If she has phobia for you, she would not be living in the same house as you.
it's obvious something is bothering her and to know what that is, both of you must talk about it. If she is not willing to, please involve a family member from her side who can talk to her and figure out what is going on; that can help break the ice and start a conversation. If even this does not help, seek professional help...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 29, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 26, 2026Hindi

My husband shares everything with his best friend. I understand they are close but I am not comfortable when he shares stuff and private bedroom conversations. Once he was joking about something deeply private I had only told my husband. While I respect friendships, I am uncomfortable when there there is no boundary between his friendship and our marriage. The last time i mentioned this, he said his friendship is older than our marriage and I am overthinking and creating unecessary stress. How do I talk to my husband about this without creating conflict?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are not overthinking. Wanting privacy about your relationship is a reasonable boundary. His friendship might be older than your marriage, your consent to share sensitive information which involves you still applies. And friendship and marriage are two different things, and each has its own place.

The best solution to this situation is to have a conversation, the right time, right place and right way. Pick a time when both of you are calm and relaxed. Frame the conversation around trust, not control. If it sounds like you are asking him to choose marriage over friendship, he might get defensive. So, highlight your emotional safety instead of sounding accusatory that he is making you feel a certain way. Be specific about your boundaries: bedroom talks are off limits, or personal insecurities should not be shared outside of the marriage. Everyone needs someone to vent to, and talking to friends is okay, but not when it makes your partner uncomfortable. Acknowledge that he needs to talk to someone about things, but remain firm about your boundaries. If he still brushes it off, let him know that joking about your private matters hurt your deeply. If nothing else works, I really suggest marriage counseling. Sometimes people need to hear the hard things from others, instead of their partner, to understand it's validity.

Hope this helps.

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 27, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 26, 2026Hindi

My wife posts everything on social media. Earlier she used to post about food and travel and our kids. Now if we have a fight or argument, she turns it into a funny reel or feminism post and everyone on her feed starts commenting. I am not on social media but when we meet socially, our common friends have started making fun of me like I am the villain. She calls herself an influencer and says it is helping her reach a wider audience. I told her she shouldn't post without my permission and it is leading to big arguments. I feel it is unfair. What should I do? Please help me sir

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand where you are coming from; it's not just the post. It's about your private life being turned into public content and mockery. Your reaction is valid and yes, it is unfair. I understand her interest in building an online presence, but it has to be separated from your right to privacy. Start with a calm conversation about this; express, verbally, how her posts make you feel. Instead of saying, "You can't post about is," try saying, "When our problems become content, it hurts the relationship and me." Or, you can say, "I am so happy that you are making content, but not when it involves our problems." It's the best way to frame the expression without sounding accusatory. Be clear about your boundaries: no posts about private matters, and consent is key. Give her real-word examples, like how your friends mock you. Try to keep the conversation as less accusatory as possible, to avoid a bigger conflict. Start with communicating your feelings.

Best Wishes

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Kanchan Rai |663 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 26, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 06, 2026Hindi

Hi, I love both my parents and my boyfriend. But my parents just cant seem to accept the fact that i have a boyfriend. At almost every stage in life, be it career, relationships, i am standing at the line and choosing whether i should choose myself and do what i want to do or should i choose what my parents say. I know they mean well for me and they want my good, but is it always have to be that way? Why do i always have to choose? I am sick and tired of hiding things from my parents but if i don't, they will intrude in my life and then everything goes haywire. is it too much too ask for acceptance? and even if i choose myself at any given time, there is this guilt of disobeying my parents that eats me alive. I am really at the threshold here.

Ans: You don’t actually want to choose between your parents and your boyfriend.
You want both love and autonomy. And that is a fair need.
The reason it feels so heavy is because you’ve been conditioned to believe that choosing yourself means hurting your parents. So even when you do something right for your life, it comes with guilt.
But here’s the shift you need to make:
You’re not choosing against your parents.
You’re choosing for your life.
Right now, hiding is draining you because it keeps you stuck in fear. But being fully open without boundaries leads to interference. So the balance is this:
Be honest, but don’t hand over control.
You can say:
“I respect your opinion, but I need to make my own decisions about my life.”
They may not like it immediately. They may react emotionally. That doesn’t mean you’re wrong—it just means they’re adjusting.
The real work for you is learning to sit with that guilt without giving in to it. Because that guilt is not a signal that you’re doing something wrong—it’s a sign that you’re doing something new.
You don’t have to stop loving your parents.
You just have to stop losing yourself to keep them comfortable.
That’s the line you’re learning to walk right now.

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Kanchan Rai |663 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 26, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 26, 2026Hindi

I miss privacy after marriage. I moved in to my husband's house after our marriage last year. But but adjusting to a joint family has been harder than I expected. There is always someone around so I have to dress appropriately. Relatives walk into our bedroom without knocking. Their rules are very different from ours. I have grown up with a lot of independence in what I wear, eat etc. Here, I have to cook at least one meal, sometimes for unexpected guests and compromise over what I eat. I moved in hoping to live with and love his family, but this lack of personal space and independence is making me irritable and anxious. Our thoughts and principles don't match. My husband has taken a huge loan to buy this house, so he will not agree to move out. How do I talk to my husband about how I feel trapped here?

Ans: What you’re experiencing feels overwhelming because it’s new to you, not because it is “wrong” in itself. In many joint families, things like shared spaces, open movement in the house, less privacy, and collective responsibilities are quite normal. People grow up with that system, so for them it doesn’t feel intrusive—it feels like family closeness.
At the same time, you come from a background where privacy, independence, and personal boundaries were natural, so the contrast feels like a loss. Both realities are valid. Neither is completely right or wrong—they are just different value systems.

This is also something that ideally should be discussed before marriage, but since it wasn’t, you are now learning and adjusting in real time—which is understandably difficult.

Now the goal is not to reject the joint family system or force yourself to accept everything silently. The goal is to find a middle ground where you can function without losing yourself.

When you talk to your husband, acknowledge his reality too. That will make him more open to hearing you. You can say something like:
“I understand this is how your family has always lived, and I respect that. But for me this is very new, and I’m struggling to adjust to the lack of personal space. I don’t want to disrespect anyone, but I also need some space to feel comfortable.”

This way, you are not attacking his family—you are explaining your adjustment challenge.

Also, instead of expecting a complete change, focus on small, realistic adjustments:
A basic level of privacy in your room (like knocking)
Some flexibility in daily expectations
Clear communication about responsibilities

In joint families, change usually doesn’t happen suddenly—it happens gradually and through understanding, not confrontation.

And one important mindset shift for you:
Adjustment doesn’t mean losing yourself completely.
But it also doesn’t mean expecting the environment to become exactly like your old life.

You are now learning how to live between two worlds.

If both you and your husband handle this with patience and respect, it can become manageable. If either side becomes rigid, then it starts feeling like suffocation.

So your task is not to “fit in perfectly,”
but to adapt without disappearing.

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Kanchan Rai |663 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 26, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 12, 2026Hindi

I am 38 year old female and my husband 39 yrs old . We got married 13 years before and we were in 10 years love relationship before marriage . Totally 23 years together .we have 2 sons , 1 is 10 yr old and 2 is 1.5 yr old . My husband is not interested or he is not getting any sexual sense at all. It’s been 2 years he didn’t touch me , he says his mind is not thinking about it and not getting any sensation . 2 years before , we had issues about his relationship with a women , he says its friendship and few instances has broken my trust and he hasn’t regained it back or never tried to fix it . He says in words but never saw his efforts to make me trust again . For 2 years am in mental trauma and confusion only whether he is saying truth or not , whether that women is friend or different . Whether he s cheating me or not . Very few activites gives me doubts to think that he s cheating rest all he s normal , goes for work and come home ... We are sleeping is same bed now for past 1.5 years after my second day. Born . Some time he sleeps with me in bed cuddling and kissing .. but nothing is intimate and nothing feels closer emotionally to him ... I dunno wat to do with him . I get w dual desire often and get rejected by him and all th time he blames me or underrate me to talk about sex . Also he scolds me that am having more sexual thoughts . I dunno what to do as if I talk calmly. He takes it to peak , if I demand , he rejects . Watever I try he rejects .. never gave a proper reason .... I dunno how to live like this ??

Ans: First, let me say this clearly: your desire is normal. Wanting intimacy, closeness, and a sexual connection with your husband is not “too much” or “wrong.” Being repeatedly rejected and then blamed for it can slowly damage your self-worth, and that’s what you’re feeling now.
But we need to separate a few things to understand what’s really happening.
Your husband’s lack of sexual interest for 2 years is not something to ignore. It could be due to multiple reasons—stress, hormonal changes, mental health issues, guilt, unresolved emotional conflict, or even disconnection from the relationship itself. But the real concern is not just the lack of sex—it’s that he avoids the conversation, shuts you down, and turns it back on you.
That creates a cycle where:
You feel rejected → you try to connect → he withdraws or blames → you feel worse → trust breaks further.
On top of this, there is unresolved trust damage from his past involvement with another woman. Even if he calls it “friendship,” the fact that it broke your trust and was never repaired properly means that wound is still open. Without rebuilding trust, emotional closeness cannot return—and without emotional closeness, physical intimacy often disappears.
Right now, you are living in three layers of pain:
You feel unwanted physically
You feel unsure emotionally
You feel unheard when you try to talk
That’s why it feels like you’re stuck.
Now, what can you realistically do?
You cannot force desire.
You cannot beg for intimacy.
And you cannot rebuild trust alone.
But you can change how you approach this.
Instead of focusing only on sex, shift the conversation to the relationship itself. At a calm moment, not during rejection, speak very directly but without blame:
“I am not just missing physical intimacy. I am feeling emotionally disconnected, rejected, and confused. I don’t want to fight, I want to understand what is happening between us.”
Watch his response carefully. Not just words, but willingness.
If he continues to deny, blame, or avoid, then this is no longer just a “sexual issue.” It becomes a relationship issue that requires intervention.
At this stage, a mature step would be to suggest couples counseling or medical evaluation. Frame it as “us” not “you.”
Because if he truly has no desire at all, he should be open to understanding why.
And if he refuses even that, then you have to face a difficult truth:
You are trying to sustain a relationship where your needs are consistently dismissed.
Also, gently reflect on something important:
Do you feel emotionally safe with him anymore, or are you constantly second-guessing and shrinking yourself?
Because intimacy doesn’t return in an environment of doubt, fear, and blame.
You have given 23 years to this relationship.
You deserve clarity, respect, and emotional connection—not confusion and rejection.
You don’t need to decide everything today.
But you do need to stop normalising this pain.

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Kanchan Rai |663 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 26, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 19, 2026Hindi

I am in love with a 42 yr old woman. She is a divorcee with a teenage daughter. We plan to get married by the end of this year. The one disagreement we have is about kids. She feels she is too old to have another kid. How do I convince her that age has nothing to do if you are healthy and fit to be a parent?

Ans: This is not a topic where one partner “wins” the argument. Having a child, especially at 42, is not just about willingness—it’s about her body, her health, her energy, and her life stage. Age does matter medically and practically. Pregnancy at 42 carries higher risks, and even if someone is fit, it is still a more demanding journey physically and emotionally.
So if she is saying she doesn’t want a child, she is not being negative—she is being realistic and self-aware.
Now the real question is not “how do I convince her,” but
can you accept her decision if it doesn’t change?
Because this is a fundamental life choice. If you want a child strongly and she does not, this difference won’t disappear after marriage—it will grow.
Instead of convincing, have a mature conversation:
Tell her honestly why having a child matters to you—not as pressure, but as a life desire. Then listen to her reasons fully—without trying to counter them. Ask her what she fears, what she has already considered, and what her limits are.
There are also middle paths you can explore together—like medical consultation to understand real risks, or even alternatives like adoption. But these should come from mutual agreement, not persuasion.
Love is not about changing someone on such a fundamental decision.
It is about asking: can we build a life together as we are?
If you can accept a future without a child with her, then move forward.
If you cannot, it’s better to face that truth now rather than after marriage.

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Kanchan Rai |663 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 26, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 23, 2026Hindi

We are in love but our families keep fighting all the time. We ignored it during our dating phase but now that we plan to get married I am getting worried. He is a Punjabi, I am a Maharashtrian buddhist. Ever since our parents got involved, we are fighting and defending each other. This has led to a lot of ego problems which I don't know how to handle. Does it get better or worse after marriage? We love our parents and can't see them fighting like this.

Ans: no, it doesn’t automatically get better after marriage—in fact, situations like this often become more intense, because families feel more involved and more entitled once things are formal.
But the real issue isn’t just the family conflict.
It’s that you and your partner have started turning against each other while trying to defend your respective sides. That’s what creates ego clashes and emotional distance.

If this pattern continues, marriage will feel like a constant pressure point.

What matters is whether the two of you can shift from
“my family vs your family”
to
“we are a team dealing with this together.”

That means not attacking each other over family issues, not carrying every argument into your relationship, and standing by each other even when things get uncomfortable.

Your families may or may not fully accept things.
But your relationship will work only if you both stay united despite that pressure, instead of letting it divide you.

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Kanchan Rai |663 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 26, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 09, 2026Hindi

Hi Maam, My married life has been a complete disasterits been 1.8 yrs. Before marriage, I had only one past relationship. My husband repeatedly asked if I had any physical relationship before marriage. I denied it initially, and when I asked him about his past, he vaguely said he had dated three women for about three months each. Whenever I asked directly about physical involvement or even something as simple as kissing, he avoided the topic or changed the subject. On the first day of our arranged marriage, after intimacy, he said something that confused me. I was already scared and anxious. Later, when he asked me to share something I had never told anyone, I told him the truth—that my past relationship involved physical intimacy, and that it was forced, not by my choice. After that, his behavior completely changed. He stopped talking to me, even during our honeymoon. We were intimate only twice, but emotionally he was completely absent. I cried constantly. After returning home, he started avoiding me, leaving the house despite working from home. He verbally abused me, made derogatory comments about my character, and threatened to tell my parents and divorce me, accusing me of hiding my past. He even went on a Europe trip alone for 15 days, barely contacting me, which made me fear he was cheating. Due to constant fights and emotional abuse, I started looking into his past and discovered disturbing things—multiple physical relationships (8–9), emails linked to prostitutes, a banned Tinder account he tried to restore even after our engagement, and trips with an ex just days before our engagement. He called her “just a friend,” but the evidence said otherwise. I also found intimate photos and videos of his exes saved on his hard disk, even though they were many years old. Despite all this, he continued to accuse and defame me in front of his parents, saying I lied about my past, while he had never disclosed his own. What I saw and experienced has deeply scarred me, and I feel he never had any emotional attachment to me from the beginning. Ever since I told him the truth, he has shown no care, no empathy, and no love. I am left questioning—was I wrong to look into his past when I was being emotionally abused and accused? Or is he simply not the right person for me, someone who lacks emotional maturity, honesty, and compassion?

Ans: What you have described is not a small marital conflict—it is a serious breach of trust, emotional safety, and dignity.
Let’s look at this with clarity, not emotion alone.
You entered this marriage with hesitation, fear, and eventually honesty. You disclosed something deeply personal, and importantly, something that involved lack of consent. In a healthy partnership, that moment should have been met with empathy, protection, and maturity. Instead, it was met with judgment, withdrawal, and later, humiliation. That is not a difference of opinion—that is a failure of emotional responsibility.
At the same time, your husband’s conduct shows a clear pattern of double standards. He withheld his own past, avoided transparency, and yet demanded complete disclosure from you. When he later accused and defamed you, despite his own undisclosed history, it indicates not confusion but control and moral inconsistency.
Your decision to look into his past did not arise in isolation. It came after sustained emotional distress, repeated accusations, and a breakdown of trust. In such circumstances, people seek evidence not out of curiosity, but out of a need to anchor themselves in reality. So no, it was not ideal—but it was understandable. More importantly, it is not the central issue.
The central issue is this:
You are in a relationship where your vulnerability has been used against you, your character has been questioned, and your emotional needs have been consistently disregarded.
Also note his behavioral responses—avoidance, verbal aggression, solo travel without communication, maintaining explicit material from past relationships, and involving his parents in a way that damages your dignity. These are not isolated incidents. They reflect emotional immaturity, lack of accountability, and poor boundaries.
So the real question is not “Was I wrong?”
The real question is: Is this a relationship that offers mutual respect, psychological safety, and the possibility of repair?
Marriage can survive difficult truths, even past experiences—but only when both partners are willing to engage with honesty, empathy, and accountability. At present, there is no indication that he is willing to do that.
Before taking any decision, it would be wise to step back and stabilise yourself emotionally. Consider individual counselling, not to fix the marriage, but to regain clarity and strength. If there is any attempt to continue this relationship, it must involve structured intervention—such as couples therapy—with clear expectations around respect, truthfulness, and boundaries.
But equally, you must allow yourself to acknowledge a difficult possibility:
Sometimes, the issue is not what went wrong in the marriage.
It is whether the person you are with is capable of sustaining a healthy one.
You were not wrong for having a past.
You were not wrong for telling the truth.
And you are not wrong for expecting dignity in your marriage.

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 21, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 18, 2026Hindi

My mother-in-law is making my life miserable. She is a widow. Whenever my husband and I spend time together, she creates small issues or finds reasons to interrupt us. She will suddenly need help with something or start an argument. It's like we rarely get time as a couple at home. Because of this we are constantly fighting. Please help.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There's no point in talking to your mother-in-law as she is just filling her emotional void and insecurity by interfering in her life. Instead, find a circle of like-minded people for her; when she looks forward to meeting people her age and with similar interests, her mind will not be around you and your husband. But also make sure to spend time with her, taking care of her emotional needs. Things will change...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 21, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 18, 2026Hindi

My wife is a homemaker and doesn't value money. Since I married her, i have always tried to keep her happy but she insists spending on maids, shopping and kitties. I never hesitated whenever she asked for money, I have always provided it. But now our children are 12 and 14 and I need to save for their coaching and future. My wife thinks marrying me was a mistake because I am not able to meet her high standard of living. I earn Rs 60,000 out of which 20k goes on rent and 20K on my children's education. With the remaining amount, i pay EMIs and other household expenses. She is not willing to adjust. What should I do? I am very stressed.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You two need a lesson or two on managing money. At the end of the day what is left is your disposable income that must be invested wisely for it to grow.
Learn Budgeting and set aside money under specific expenditure labels (fixed and variable) and then whatever is left, portion some towards fun and entertainment and the rest invest in something meaningful...You could seek the help of a close friend or family who are good at managing their monies and apply it to yourself...
But as a start point, be polite yet firm and emphasizing to your wife that you are managing the money from now on; it may seem like you are doubting her or taking away her power but just until you are able to put a system in place monies and slowly she will appreciate what you are doing for her and the family. Start somewhere...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 20, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 17, 2026Hindi

Currently , I am in 2nd year of my clg , btech CCE in MUJ .... Studies are fine. After my breakup with my first bf( 3 years back) it really shook me of as I got to know he cheated on me and I wasted my precious time thinking about him though I have overcame from this .... So I met this guy online .... We are from same clg but diff department... Class are on the same floor so we met a few times but that was also an eye contact or simple hi hello .... We started talking from 2nd sem .... And in 2nd-3rd sem it felt like he liked me but I wasn't ready. And he never brought this topic it was simply friendly banter or thoda bahut flirting and now from the starting of 4th sem things have changed like in his behaviour, way he used to talk, holding the convos ..it's like he's cutting me.... though I talked about this and he cleared like it's nothing like that but yeah many things are changed .... We dont talk like we used to , he seems non interested, late replies ... And here as soon as I started liking him he got off ... I even gave him slight hints but now it feels like I am desperate to talk it is making me feel clingy distracted that I can't just stop thinking about it ... It's becoming a hindrance in my studies . .. I feel like whenever I start to like someone that other person gets off like he's not interested it has happened a many of times .. it makes me feels o dumb and stupid like do I even have something that the other person would like me or even just stop being non interested or giving mixed signals

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand how you are feeling and it is very normal to question yourself when you notice the pattern more than one time. But trust me, it is not you. Sometimes people have fleeting feelings for each other. It can also be that since the guy did not feel you reciprocate the same feeling, he moved on to protect his heart. Or some people with casual feelings just lose interest as soon as the chase is over. The reason does not matter; what matters here is that it's not your fault. This clingy, distracted feeling will pass soon. This is not love; you just miss feeling important to someone and it's completely normal. Don't think of this as a loss. He was never the right person for you to begin with if he wants to cut you off suddenly. You deserve to be loved completely, not just when it's convenient for them.

Hope this helps.

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Dr Upneet Kaur |83 Answers |Ask -Follow

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Apr 20, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 01, 2026Hindi

I feel invisible in my own marriage. I’m 36 now, and we are married for 8 years with a beautiful daughter. My wife is a great mother, homemaker and manages everything at home, but we have nothing in common. We haven’t had a real conversation or emotional connection in years. Recently, I got emotionally attached to a senior female colleague who actually listened to me. We went out for coffee and there was an instant emotional connection. I don't feel guilty but I am confused. Is this how emotional affairs begin in long-term marriages? Is it wrong to choose a partner who you are emotionally compatible with?

Ans: Hello sir. I hope you are in good health. Marriage is a long term association in which slowly and slowly we get to know about the positives and negatives of a person. We all have two sides. One is romantic and other is the one who handles all the responsibility. Isn't it good that your wife responsibly handles all the household chores along with your kids and takes care of your needs too. May be she is also lost somewhere and is burdened under all responsibilities. I understand that you may have problems and you may not feel the emotional connection between you too.
There are ways to sort out this. Find some common interest that you both enjoy and do such activities. You may talk with your wife at the end of the day and ask her about her day, you can share about your day. You can discuss your future plans.
In previous times extra marital affairs were very less. Because people used to work with each other and work on each other. They never used to give up on each other. That's why the relationships used to last for more than 50 years even.
You can talk to your colleague as a friend. Friends do listen to each other and have emotional connect but having more than that would not be advisable.
I hope you get some light in your mind.
Take care!
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 20, 2026

Question by geeta - Apr 18, 2026Hindi

Meri beti 30 sal ki hai aur uski shadi kahi final nahi ho pa Rahi hai

Ans: Dear geeta,
Aapka sawaal kya hai?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 20, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 17, 2026Hindi

I wrote my problem sometimes back Problem was the indifferent attitude of my wife and only son at my old age. You suggested me to adjust. So I gave most of my property to my wife and son and moved to old age home. I started my life my scratch and worked to create wealth and my own house. Today I have old age health problems and old age home treats me well for which I pay to them. I'm still earning my stock business. Now my wife reqests me to join her. I'm happy with my fate but I spent nearly 50 years with her and hence in dilemma. Please suggest with your opinion.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am unaware on what I suggested to you since I can't see the earlier question here.
It's great that the time period of separation has helped you both cherish those 50 years of togetherness; maybe now your wife has in fact changed and looks forward to spending the rest of her life with you. People can change, right?
Spend some time with her and then you will know more...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Asked on - May 01, 2026 | Answered on May 04, 2026

Yes I will follow your suggestion Now I'm a man with no enemy Thank you

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
That is good to hear :)

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 20, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 17, 2026Hindi

I'm a 53 year old married man living with two sons. In 2020, my wife found that I am having an affair and left for her parent's place. We were never compatible and having children was her choice. I had told her before our marriage that I am not the husband she was hoping me to be. She chose to be a homemaker and insisted on having kids. Before marriage, I had also mentioned to her that I am seeing someone who was going through her own separation, but she said she wanted to marry me for her own freedom. Now she's living with her parents and we have no contact whatsover. We haven't spoken in all these years but she doesn't want to consent to divorce. I have singlehandedly taken care of my sons in these 6 years. She speaks to her sons when they are outside, and they told me she wants them to stay with me because she doesn't want to work or provide for them. I am okay to provide alimony but she doesn't want to sign the divorce papers. My lawyer has tried to speak with her but she wants to stay married so that I can suffer. What kind of punishment is this? What should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What can you do about it? If she does not want a divorce and this is a vengeance thing for your affair, the only thing you can do is speak with her. All the stuff that went South needs to be addressed and YES, there will be a point in time where she will expect you apologize. Yes, you did mention to her about how you view marriage BUT you still went ahead and married and had had kids as well. As far as she is concerned, she always was in an ideal marriage while you had your definition for it and both of you lived the relationship in your own ways.
The best is to appeal to her better sense and hope that someday she will see that it is better to separate than stick together.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 20, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 14, 2026Hindi

My parents are against my divorce. I am married for 17 years but we have been living as stranger for the past 7 years. We had an arranged marriage and we don't get along. Initially I thought it was because we had a 6 year age gap. But most days, it has been rough. No respect from in-laws, constant arguments and fighting. Husband wanted me to stay away for some time but I realised he is just finding grounds for divorce from my end. He doesn't want to give alimony and wants full custody of our 14 year old son. I have mortgaged my gold to buy this 3bhk house but he dismisses my contribution because the house is in his mother's name. She is still alive. My mental peace is destroyed. But i want to do the right thing for us and my son. Anu mam, do you think I should live separate and give up my rights to this house and my son? If he files for divorce will he have a better advantage than me? Please guide what to do.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Whether you should make the marriage work or live separately is a decision that is yours to make; what I can suggest is to actually understand and become aware as to what you want in life.
If marriage was always an important thing, then maybe some work in that direction can help which means you may have to as a couple set aside differences and work as a unit to put the marriage back together. This also will require your husband to cooperate and view it as important as you do. So, have a conversation with him without it leading into an argument.
Now, if you choose to go separate how and what will be an advantage is something that only a lawyer will be able to guide you on.
So, as a first step become aware about whether you view marriage as an important structure in your life or not; the rest of the steps will follow from this.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 18, 2026

Question by Harshada - Apr 11, 2026Hindi

I am very stressed about career because very confused in it. Fear of failure are front of me and I always took back side

Ans: Dear Harshada,
What exactly is your question for me? Please in detail explain what is the stress in your career and where do you feel the fear of failure?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 14, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 13, 2026Hindi

My wife doesn't like my choice of gifts. If I buy a sari she doesn't like the colour. If I take her out on a lunch or dinner she will complain about the food. We have been married for 20 years and till date I don't know what makes her happy. If I ask she will say I don't love her. What is this? How will I know if she doesn't say what she wants. Im tired and confused what to buy for our anniversary next week

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that this can be frustrating but how about sit her down and have an open conversation? Let her know that you are not accusing her but you really want to understand what is the matter. Tell her how her constant unhappiness makes you feel. Communication can help a lot more than we imagine.
Hope this helps

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 13, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 05, 2026Hindi

How can one married woman destroy another's life? My husband has been spending more time with his married office colleague whose children have grown up and live abroad. Since I am a homemaker, whenever they meet at our home or during public events when I am around, they talk in riddles that only they seem to understand and laugh about. It used to be annoying and I have also expressed to both of them about how I feel. But I am never taken seriously. They even hug each other so intimately that I feel like the third wheel in their relationship. My husband never appreciates me, he even refuses to acknowledge my feelings. He thinks I am some illiterate homemaker but I had a well paying job. I used to lead a team and I know I am not overreacting. I can tell when a colleague becomes more than a coworker. I can tell that they are having an affair from the way she holds my husband's arm. I am tired of confronting and I don't want to lose my sanity trying to defend my respect. I am just waiting for my daughter to complete her board exam so I can talk to her about this. Anu mam, I need your help. How can I seek divorce while still keeping my dignity?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You have two paths n front of you; either you move on or make your marriage work.
Both paths are not easy but the latter can help you rebuild your marriage. But if you feel strongly about moving on, do find a good lawyer who can help you with the legal proceedings.
To maintain your dignity, make sure that you clearly state what you want as a part of your separation and NO, there is no shame or backing out in this; your lawyer should be able to take care of this.
Also, divorce can take a huge toil on your emotional health; make no mistake about it especially since you are the aggrieved one in this case. And if your husband chooses to contest, the battle can turn ugly. Be prepared for these turn of events; keep your family and friends close as you will need to fall back on someone.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 13, 2026

Question by Satya - Apr 04, 2026Hindi

Why health is not good bcoz of stress

Ans: Dear Satya,
Mind and Body are connected; so what happens to the body also affects the mind and vice-versa.
If stress is being allowed to take over, it simply means a person has allowed his/her mind to control them. Learning how to manage stress can help:
- do activities that keep one in the present moment
- doing at least 20 mins of what one loves everyday
- exercise and good sleep are a must
- check what people surround the person

A small tweak can go a long way in managing stress; one must just have the willingness to do that!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 10, 2026

Question by Jayakiran - Mar 03, 2026Hindi

It has been 5 months since we had sex, my wife is more into u get intimate, why should I be the one or more of zero interest or no urge to have sex with me. We don't have sex regularly, maybe 12 times a year. Slowly we are becoming more like 2 individuals living together for sake of daughter. She keeps making daughter to sleep along with us tough she is 13. I don't mind, but this is creating wall for intimacy.

Ans: Dear Jayakiran,
Lack of intimacy can stem from many reasons. Please have an open conversation with your wife and try to understand what is causing it. Hear her, instead of being defensive or accuse her of no interest. Simple communication can sort out most of these issues.

Hope this helps

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 08, 2026

Question by LALIT - Apr 07, 2026Hindi

i am asking in English language only, but you are not accepting it

Ans: Dear Lalit,
I am not sure what you mean but if you have unanswered queries, it might be because your questions did not reach me. Please feel free to resend it.

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Ravi Mittal |731 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 07, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 05, 2026Hindi

My husband is having an affair with his junior. She is a divorcee and texts my husband every day late in the night. Then he steps out for a walk and comes home late by 2 am. I am a homemaker adn mother of two sons. There is no intimacy but he never demanded it either. I quit my corporate job to take care of our sons and his family. And now this new development is making me angry. I also found out through a common friend that they are intimate and there are gossips in office that they plan to live together after our divorce. How do I start this uncomfortable conversation with my husband?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that it’s an extraordinarily painful time for you. After all the care, love and sacrifice, you definitely don’t deserve this. Let me ask you something, do you really want to live with a man who has no respect for you or the marriage? I understand that divorce is a really big decision, especially with children involved, but you don’t deserve to be stuck in a marriage where your partner does not value you. Please have a conversation with your husband and express how his actions have made you feel; he should understand that actions have consequences. After that, it is entirely up to you whether you still want to stay in the marriage. Please speak to close family members and seek their advice. You don’t know how much their support can help in a situation like this.

Hope this helps.

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 31, 2026Hindi

Hi Ma'am, I am 37 and my wife is 5 years younger to me. We are married for last 7 years. My wife has been talking to a male friend of hers which I have been not liking and I had also discussed with her couple of times. Despite that she use to say he is just a good friend and don't think so much. I use to believe her. Recently I found out after reading her Whatsapp message that she has been cheating on me since a year. She has also got in physical relationship with him couple of times. We are in middle of planning a baby through IUI process and all these things have come in front of me. I have confronted her now and have said that I have read all her messages and she is speechless. She knows she is at fault she is scared. We have not been talking to each other since last night. Kindly advice what step should I take ahead. She is pleading me to not to stop the IUI procedure and wants to try for a baby. I am completely shattered now and have no willingness to do anything now. I have always loved her. I still feel emotional for her that what will happen to her life if I give her divorce and when both the families will get involved. Her family is very orthodox family. They wont even accept her. Many things going on in my mind and hard to pen down everything. Kindly advice what is your suggestion in this scenario.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am sure that you feel cheated and beaten down and this is not the time to pursue IUI; first sort out the issues between the two of you. With the added pressure of IUI, the marriage where trust is broken will just deteriorate.
So, first things first, either work together to sort the marriage OR seek a professional to guide you on the same.
A baby that is conceived in love and harmony is what any parent will want, so rebuilding that love must be the priority if of course, you as an affected party want that. Please reflect on this and have an honest chat with your wife and see what direction you wish to take...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 31, 2026Hindi

My BF is a stalker. It was fun when he used to stalk me because I thought he was genuinely interested in knowing more about me, but now I see him stalking profiles of other women. When I caught him, he dismissed saying Instagram suggested these profiles. I have known him for 4 years but this is one behaviour I am not comfortable at all. What should I do? Should I report him, break up with him? He hasn't misbehaved with anyone but my friend told me that he sent her a request to follow on Instagram. I did my own investigation and found that he has another account on which he follows only women. I am honestly very confused and shocked.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Even after being in a relationship with you, he prefers stalking and amusing himself with women on social media apps, is NOT OKAY!
And if he has another account exclusively to stalk women, do you not see it as a RED FLAG? What exactly is confusing in that? He's possibly committed to you and still seeking his amusement outside as well...I am sure that you know what to to do!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 31, 2026Hindi

I have been married for 24 years, and ours was a love marriage. We have two sons who are now grown up, and for most of our married life, things were stable and peaceful between us. Over the years, like many couples, we got busy with responsibilities, work, children, and daily life. Slowly our emotional and physical connection started fading without us even realising it. For the past few years, especially after our children became independent, I have started feeling a sense of emptiness in our relationship. We live in the same house but hardly talk beyond basic daily conversations. There is no warmth, no affection, and we have not been physically close for a long time. Recently, when I tried to initiate closeness or even simple gestures like holding her hand, she seemed uncomfortable like I am some stranger. I was very hurt but I didn't react. I still care deeply for her and want to rebuild our bond. I don’t know if she has emotionally moved on, lost interest in the relationship, or if this is just a phase many long-term marriages go through. How can I win her back in my life?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Raising kids, family responsibilities and duties can somehow push the spark of marriage to a bare minimum and before you know it, the communication breakdown will make you believe that there the marriage is over. But it's far from over; in fact it's a wake-up call to RESET and plunge back into understanding why you married your wife and not just anybody else.
It's important to count on what you add to each other and value what you bring to the marriage. Once you neutralize it to a point where you are willing to put in the hard work necessary to reset the marriage, half your is done. Start with intimate (emotional) conversations and do things with one another. I always suggest date nights to bring back that fun and no-care in the world feeling, It can ignite a lot of passion back into the marriage. Start...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1805 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 31, 2026Hindi

My son doesn't respect me at all. At first I thought he was just being a kid and ignored his tantrums. Now he is 11 and back answers me in front of elders and guests. I have never laid my hands on him but i have scolded him enough, made him understand when he was a child. He used to be scared of his father earlier but now he says do what you want. I don't know what is wrong with him. Things at home haven't been good either. We are going through some financial issues due to which we have to cut down expenses. I can't afford an expensive counsellor. The school counsellor said it could be teen rage and it may get better when he grows up. I am not convinced. What should I do to help?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Any change in situations at home can cause a behavior change in a child due to resistance, fear and more...
He possibly sees it a some sort of threat that things maybe taken away from him that he is sued to; what goes on in a child's mind is the job of parents and/or a counselor.
Not all counselors are expensive and you maybe able to find someone who can help your son. In the meantime what I suggest is to not have any financial related chats in front of the child. Also, become aware of how your mind state of anxiety and worry might be impacting him; if you could isolate him from your thoughts and worries, that will be a great gift at this point in time for the child. Any change in the environment can impact in a good and not-so-good manner; so try and keep it light...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Dr Upneet Kaur |83 Answers |Ask -Follow

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Apr 03, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 01, 2026Hindi

I'm a 33-year-old married woman, and I recently discovered that my husband has been deleting chats and hiding conversations with a female colleague. When I confronted him, he said it’s 'just harmless flirting' and accused me of being insecure and overreacting. The problem is, I can’t shake off this constant anxiety and urge to check his phone, which is slowly affecting my mental peace. Are these early signs of emotional cheating in marriage, and how do you rebuild trust when your partner doesn’t see anything wrong with their behaviour?

Ans: Hello mam. I hope you are in good health. Mam, marriage is all about trust and good communication. If these two things are there in marriage then things do work out. I understand that you are having anxiety and you feel insecure in this situation but if your husband ia saying that it was a casual talk and you have not confronted him before this then I think you should give him another fair chance with trust and you should not feel it a cheating. Try to spend some more quality time with him. You will see changes soon.
Take care!
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur

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Kanchan Rai |663 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 02, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 31, 2026Hindi

Mam, why do women always have to adjust in a marriage? Why don't our parents ever accept that men can be at fault too? Whenever I tell my mother or mother in law about something hurtful my husband said or did, she tells me to forgive and move on. He never apologises or thinks he has done anything wrong. My husband and I are married for 11 years, but he never admits he has done anything wrong. Isn't it disrespectful and unfair to ask a woman to adjust and ignore without listening to both sides of the story?

Ans: You’re right. It’s unfair. And it’s exhausting.
Women are told to “adjust” because it’s easier for families to keep peace than to hold men accountable. Your mother and mother-in-law are not really judging right or wrong — they’re choosing convenience over fairness.

But that doesn’t make it correct.

If your husband never apologises, never reflects, and you are always the one expected to move on, then this is not adjustment — this is imbalance.

And the real issue is not your parents anymore.
It’s that your husband has learned he doesn’t have to take responsibility, because the system around him supports that.

You don’t need to argue with your parents to prove your point.
You need to stop silently accepting a pattern that hurts you.

You don’t have to fight.
But you also don’t have to keep absorbing everything.

A simple shift is this:
instead of explaining again and again, just say calmly —
“This hurt me. I’m not okay with ignoring it.”

And then don’t rush to normalise things immediately.

Respect in a marriage doesn’t come from adjusting more.
It comes when the other person realises you won’t keep accepting less.

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