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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1805 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 26, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - May 19, 2025Hindi
Relationship

Hi Anu mam, my wife have freindship with other gender. He maintain freindship with her school friends of other gender.one of them asked her out before marraige. She said not interested and continuing friendship.how to make her understand friendship with other gender after marraige is risky?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Friendship with the other gender after marriage is not risky but it can become risky if boundaries are not drawn clearly.
- What exactly are you worried about when she speaks with another man?
- Has she suddenly stopped caring for you and the home?
- Have you any proof that she and the man are interested in one another?
Sometimes, it could also be that you are uncomfortable with her talking to another man and so it feels wrong that she is doing that. If she's maintaining healthy boundaries and not ignoring her marriage, why worry?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1805 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 21, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 13, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
I am 43 years old, same is my wife. We had love marriage. We are together for 23 years and have 2 kids. Now from last one year my wife is getting attracted towards a man. She has never said it openly but it is very much visible that she is attracted towards him. We always have tensed fights over this issue. She always says that nothing is there but I can make out that she is interested in that man. Because of frequent fights , kids are suffering. Please suggest , what should I do.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Most often fights start because of assumptions about a situation and about a person.
Instead of making assumptions that it is very much visible that she is attracted towards him, why not ask her? Of course she may deny it altogether.
Then what do you do?
You actually remain silent till the point that she ends up actually has a behavior change than the usual and then sit down and talk about it. Behavior changes within a familiar situation usually means something else is going on. That is the only way that you might get her to talking about it. Otherwise it will be an allegation and she will strongly deny or take offense to. Either way it will be difficult to deal with as the unrest spreads in the family.
Be patient and then slowly broach the topic observing any change from the usual...And if what you say is actually true, deal with it with butter fingers. It takes a second for a fight to erupt but patching up after that is a lot of strain...be patient...

All the best!

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |663 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 14, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am happily married man of age 51 years having daughter of 20 years .recently i got normal friendship with a female colleague we discuss usually our office, children and health .Recently she was under depression and i counseled her a lot and she got better. My wife got to know about this through my daughter who checked my phone , my wife got anxious thinking i am having affair with her ,as she being widow .My wife charcter assanated me when there is no such thing in between me and my colleague .i am depressed please advise
Ans: It’s understandable that you're feeling hurt and frustrated, especially since your intentions were pure and your wife’s reaction came from a place of misunderstanding. In situations like this, transparency and communication are key to mending the trust that’s been shaken.

First, it's important to have a calm, honest conversation with your wife. Explain the nature of your friendship with your colleague, emphasizing that it was based on helping her through a difficult time and nothing more. Be open about why you supported your colleague and reassure your wife that there is no romantic involvement. Acknowledge her feelings, as it’s clear she is reacting out of fear and concern for your relationship.

Your daughter’s involvement complicates the situation, but it can also be an opportunity to show both your wife and daughter that there’s nothing to hide. Let them see your messages if that reassures them, and express that your commitment to your family is unwavering.

Additionally, emphasize that you understand why your wife may have felt uneasy, especially since the colleague is a widow. Sometimes, just being heard and understood can help ease her anxiety. Reassure her that your focus is on your family and that you’re willing to make any adjustments necessary to rebuild her trust.

If the situation continues to cause tension, consider seeking professional counseling as a couple. A therapist can help mediate the conversation and provide tools for rebuilding trust and communication in a healthy way. By showing your commitment to resolving the issue and prioritizing your family, you can work through this misunderstanding together.

..Read more

Shalini

Shalini Singh  |188 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Sep 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 01, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Shalini Ji,Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. Partner(F28)continuing friendship with a person[M] who had crush on her before marriage considered emotional infidelity? Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. My wife is having friendship (strictly platonic) with a guy from her 10tlh grade (same class). Before our marriage (she may be doing her college, our relationship just started may be 2 weeks) this guy told her he has genuine interest in her and he want to take the relationship further if she wants, she said she is not interested in a relationship and she got committed, she always saw him as a friend, no other feelings for him and we can be friends if you don't bring any romantic interest again. He never took this talk again ever after and happy to be a friend. They are talking as friends. She got married to me. He also got married. They still do chats once in a month. She introduced me to him and visited his home when we visited his country. He also came to our home once with his family. She used to update me with every chat she had with him and the content they are chatting. I am ok with that When we were talking about our school life and college life 2 years before. She said this guy had crush on her during her college days. I asked her, why did not she tell me this info till now. She said it is not purposely, she does not feel the need to do as the person is not in-appropriate with her and continuing as good friend as promised after she rejected his proposal. I don’t want to create any unnecessary issues as I don’t have any felling or so with him. That time I checked their chats completely, it’s about update about their common friends, their recent travel, their job, meditation courses and the books they read recently. I haven’t seen any flirting or romantic message from either of them. So I am perfectly fine with it and had no problems. I recently came to know about the concept of emotional cheating which is very new to me. Before that cheating to me is only flirting, sexeting and physical sex. I have asked for advice in redddit.com in infedility sub forum about emotional cheating/ emotion affair. There persons are advising like even having friendship with someone who had crush on you is emotional cheating as it is indirectly leading them on you. So with a omission of lie he had crush on her and indirectly leading him on you wife was emotionally cheating on you. This is very much equal to cheating. I do have lots of friends in other gender, but no one had crush on me. Does this count as emotional cheating/affair as she did not mention he had crush on her before marriage? I am little depressed and not able to spend quality time with my wife who is in postpartum depression and take care of our daughter properly as before. Do you guys advise me how to navigate this situation?
Ans: I read this - ,Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. and post that with the limited data you have shared you are overthinking and investing time there vs making memories with your family.

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |731 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 10, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi, Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. Partner(F28)continuing friendship with a person[M] who had crush on her before marriage considered emotional infidelity? Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. My wife is having friendship (strictly platonic) with a guy from her 10tlh grade (same class). Before our marriage (she may be doing her college, our relationship just started may be 2 weeks) this guy told her he has genuine interest in her and he want to take the relationship further if she wants, she said she is not interested in a relationship and she got committed, she always saw him as a friend, no other feelings for him and we can be friends if you don't bring any romantic interest again. He never took this talk again ever after and happy to be a friend. They are talking as friends. She got married to me. He also got married. They still do chats once in a month. She introduced me to him and visited his home when we visited his city. He also came to our home once (me and my family was there). She used to update me with chat she had with him and the content they are chatting. I am ok with that When we were talking about our school life and college life 2 years before. She said this guy had crush on her during her college days. I asked her, why did not she tell me this info till now. She said it is not purposely, she does not feel the need to do as the person is not in-appropriate with her and continuing as good friend as promised after she rejected his proposal. I don’t want to create any unnecessary issues as I don’t have any felling or so with him. That time I checked their chats completely, it’s about update about their common friends, their recent travel, their job, meditation courses and the books they read recently. I haven’t seen any flirting or romantic message from either of them. So I am perfectly fine with it and had no problems. I recently came to know about the concept of emotional cheating which is very new to me. Before that cheating to me is only flirting, sexeting and physical sex. I have asked for advice in redddit.com in infedility sub forum about emotional cheating/ emotion affair. There persons are advising like even having friendship with someone who had crush on you is emotional cheating as it is indirectly leading them on you. So with an omission of lie he had crush on her and indirectly leading him on you wife was emotionally cheating on you. This is very much equal to cheating. I do have lots of friends in other gender, but no one had crush on me. Does this count as emotional cheating/affair as she did not mention he had crush on her before marriage? I am little depressed and not able to spend quality time with my wife who is in postpartum depression and take care of our daughter properly as before. Do you guys advise me how to navigate this situation?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Are you really going to ruin your happy relationship based on some new term you have learned recently? Emotional cheating and many more terms of the kind will come and go, what truly matters is the truth. She is merely friends with this guy and for your peace of mind, you have even checked their conversations- what part of it looks like cheating to you? If tomorrow, some random person projecting their own insecurities claims that a man speaking to a woman is some "new form" of cheating, would you start believing that? My point is that these are just random opinions of some people- it isn't the ultimate truth. The entire context matters. This man had a crush on your wife, she rejected it, and now they are just friends. I find absolutely no misconduct or infidelity in this. The fact that none of your friends had a crush on you does not factor in at all. Moreover, your wife is in postpartum depression- that should be your biggest concern but here you are, giving more importance to the random 2 AM thoughts of some people you don't even know. Please rethink if you are being fair to your wife- the mother of your child.

Best Wishes

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11205 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 17, 2026

Money
Sir - Kindly enlighten me whether SIP or onetime lumpsum investment is the best, while investing in MFs . Thank you.
Ans: It is good that you are thinking about the investment method rather than simply investing. The answer is that both SIP and lump sum have their place, depending on your financial situation and market conditions.

» When SIP May Be Better

SIP is suitable when you receive income monthly.
It brings investment discipline.
It reduces the risk of investing a large amount just before a market correction.
It helps average out the purchase cost over time.
It is particularly useful for long-term goals such as retirement, children's education, and wealth creation.

For most salaried investors, SIP is usually the preferred route because investments happen gradually alongside regular income.

» When Lump Sum May Be Better

Lump sum investing can be considered when you receive a large amount at one time, such as a bonus, inheritance, gift, retirement benefit, or sale proceeds from an asset.
If you have a long investment horizon and the money is not required for many years, a lump sum investment may create greater wealth because the entire amount starts compounding immediately.
However, the timing risk is higher.

» Which Has Created More Wealth Historically?

Over long periods, markets generally move upward despite temporary corrections.
Therefore, when a sizeable amount is already available, lump sum investing has often produced better results than spreading the same money over many months.
The reason is simple: more money remains invested for a longer period.

However, this advantage comes only when the investor can tolerate market volatility.

» A Practical Approach

For monthly savings from salary, continue through SIPs.
For large one-time amounts, consider investing systematically over a reasonable period if market volatility worries you.
Do not keep long-term investment money idle in savings accounts waiting for the "perfect" market level. Such opportunities are usually visible only in hindsight.

» Final Insights

SIP is not superior to lump sum in every situation.
Lump sum is not superior to SIP in every situation.
SIP is ideal for regular monthly income.
Lump sum is suitable when a large amount is already available for long-term investment.
The best strategy is often a combination of both, depending on the source of money and your comfort with market fluctuations.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

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Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |8258 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 17, 2026

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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