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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |629 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2023

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Nov 24, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I have a problem speaking with women, I can't directly look into them eye eye contact and talk. How do I overcome this, I don't want this. I am 35 years.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

You might think you are alone with such an issue, but more people than you know go through the same. It is great that you addressed it and are putting real effort into changing it. How about you start by practicing in low-pressure situations? For instance, practice eye contact with friends or family. Hold brief but intentional eye contact during conversations. Initially, you might feel uneasy, but gradually it will get better. Also, I suggest you consider seeking support from a therapist. Maybe it's a very trivial communication issue right now, but the more you wait, the worse it might get.

Again, remember you are not alone in this. It happens to the best of us.

Best Wishes!

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |623 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 20, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 19, 2024Hindi
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I am finding it hard to talk with strangers/random people whom I've known in the past but not in contact for a while and finding it hard to recognize some which makes them feel awkward. What should I do, are there exercises I could do/should I accept that about me, maybe be upfront about it but that will be awkward too? Age 24
Ans: It's entirely normal to feel uncomfortable or awkward when reconnecting with people you haven't been in contact with for a while or struggling to recognize them. Here are some tips that might help you navigate these situations more comfortably:

Focus on listening attentively to what the other person is saying rather than worrying about recognizing them or feeling awkward. Engage in the conversation by asking questions and showing genuine interest in their experiences.
If you're struggling to remember someone's name or recognize them, it's okay to be honest about it. You can say something like, "I'm sorry, it's been a while since we last met, and I'm having trouble placing you. Could you remind me of your name?" Most people will understand and appreciate your honesty.
Try to recall any shared experiences or details that might help jog your memory about the person you're reconnecting with. Ask about mutual friends, past events, or shared interests to facilitate the conversation.
Stay present in the moment and focus on the conversation rather than letting your mind wander or dwell on feelings of awkwardness. Mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing or grounding exercises, can help you stay centered and calm.
Approach the situation with a positive attitude and be open to reconnecting with old acquaintances. Remember that it's natural for people to change and evolve over time, and your past interactions may have shaped who they are today.
It's okay to make mistakes or feel uncomfortable in social situations. Be kind to yourself and recognize that everyone experiences moments of awkwardness from time to time. Focus on learning and growing from each interaction rather than dwelling on perceived shortcomings.
If you're feeling particularly anxious about reconnecting with people, consider practicing social skills in low-pressure situations. Role-play conversations with a friend or family member, or join social groups or activities where you can gradually build confidence in interacting with others.
Remember that social interactions can be challenging for many people, and you're not alone in feeling this way. By approaching these situations with patience, honesty, and a willingness to learn, you can navigate them more comfortably over time.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |629 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Aug 20, 2024

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I am 40 year old man. Having psychological problems after coronavirus shutdown .Problem is that I am not able to talk to others looking at their eyes..even If i try to , it's just for few seconds and eyes starts to wander..to stop that , nowadays If I sense that my eyes going off contact, I look at somewhere and talk..I am feeling very guilt and making very discomfort to others or at least I think they feel discomfort .. While talking to woman, mainly making sure I should not look at theirs.. I am married and my sexual relationship is not great..every time its like forceful because my wife never shows interest and I stopped it. searching for some other options to fulfill my desire .I think this also contributes to my problem.. please advise how do I overcome my problem and be confident while talking to others.
Ans: Dear therinthu,

First of all, it's important to understand that the lockdown affected every one of us in some way or the other. Yours is a more complex mix of emotional and marital problems. Covid has left a lot of us with heightened anxiety issues and that is what might be troubling you as well. Understand that it isn't uncommon and it can be sorted with a little bit of practice. Try practicing eye contact in a less stressful situation, like with a close friend. Maintain eye contact for over five seconds, ten seconds, and so on. You can also practice in front of a mirror. When interacting with someone, focus on the conversation; focus on listening instead of thinking how you are coming off. It will take off the pressure of eye contact and reduce your anxiety.

Your marital issues might be adding to the anxiety. Try having an honest discussion with your wife. Address your problems and offer to see a marriage counselor to work on them. Individual therapies can also work. Seeking the help of a trained professional can benefit your marriage.

The pandemic has been tough on us all. Be kind to yourself.

Best Wishes.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9752 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 31, 2025

Career
Sir my rank is 16894 OC category no EWS .I got kmec CSM in second phase in tg eapcet. I am going for 3rd phase. So could you please guide me whether vidya jyoti institute of technology cse is better or kmec. In 3rd phase can I get Iare , cmrk , cvr , mgit , vjit , snist , anurag only cse and specializations . Are there any chances to get any of these colleges in 3rd phase ? Please guide me sir.
Ans: Dhaksh, With an OC category rank of 16,894 in TG EAPCET, you have secured Computer Science and Business Systems (CSM) at Keshav Memorial Engineering College (KMEC) in phase 2, and are now considering options for phase 3, including CSE at Vidya Jyothi Institute of Technology (VJIT), as well as aspirational seats at IARE, CMRK, CVR, MGIT, VJIT, SNIST, and Anurag (all CSE and related specializations). Based on the official 2024 TG EAPCET closing ranks and highly regarded educational portals, your current rank is well outside the typical closing ranks for OC candidates in CSE at top-tier colleges: CVR (3,200–4,200), MGIT (3,412–3,417), IARE (well under 1,000), SNIST and Anurag (typically under 8,000 for CSE), and CMRK (usually closes by 17,000). VJIT’s CSE (core) closed at 22,455 and AI-ML/Data Science specializations closed between 20,423–21,363, making VJIT’s CSE the only program among your choices where your rank sits comfortably within range for both core and allied branches in phase 3. KMEC’s CSM course typically has closing ranks around 17,263–18,648 for OC, which fits your present allocation and gives the campus a competitive, yet supportive environment, with strong faculty, modern infrastructure, transparent placement processes, and good industry connections. Both KMEC and VJIT have consistently placed 70–90% of eligible students in reputable IT and core companies, with experienced faculty and ample campus facilities, though VJIT is consistently rated higher for core CSE in terms of peer crowd, coding culture, alumni base, research opportunities, and recruiter interest.

In summary, at a 16,894 OC rank, you are unlikely to secure CSE at IARE, CMRK, CVR, MGIT, SNIST, or Anurag (across specializations) as their closing ranks are much lower for OC. VJIT CSE remains open in the upcoming round and is a stronger academic and placement choice than KMEC CSM. Both KMEC and VJIT offer key advantages—NAAC accreditation, modern labs, industry-engaged faculty, active coding culture, and well-structured placement cells—but VJIT provides a more prominent academic environment and greater success for core CSE aspirations.

RECOMMENDATION: Among realistic options, VJIT CSE is the preferred choice as it aligns with your rank, offers better placements, stronger academic pedigree, and deeper industry linkages. You may retain KMEC CSM as a secondary option, but prioritize VJIT CSE (and allied specializations) for a more competitive peer group, robust campus experience, and long-term professional growth. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9752 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 31, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 31, 2025Hindi
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |629 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jul 31, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 31, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hii mam i have done my registered marriage in April 2024 without knowing of my parents and now i m living in my mother's House without telling that i m married ? Now how can i convince my parents. I have told my parents about him but don't even want to talk to him or his parents.. how can i convince my parents?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are in a sensitive situation. Patience and empathy is extremely important if you want to convince your parents. Understand their side; what are they objecting and why. Once you get that, it will be easier to debunk any misunderstandings they have about your relationship. Have calm one-on-one conversation with each parent instead of talking to both of them at once. Your first task is to make them listen, not immediately approve. Acknowledge any mistake they bring up; it is indeed unfair to not include your parents in your marriage decision, at least, in India. Though I am sure you had your reasons and I am not judging at all. But you need to acknowledge that it was not right of you to do that. This makes you come off more responsible, mature and sincere. Ask them gently what they do not like about your partner and once you understand it, show them his positive side.

Do not threaten, or give ultimatum. Don’t use dialogues like my life my decision if you want them to ever approve of this relationship. Be patient and give them time to come to terms with it.

Lastly, if you, even once feel that some of their objections are valid and you never saw it that way, please take things slow. We do miss a lot when we are in love. I am sure that’s not the case with you, but just in case, please do not hesitate to rethink.

Best Wishes.

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