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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |613 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 08, 2023

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Dec 07, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I am dating my boss for the last 5 years. I am unmarried and he is committed to another woman. It started as a fling but now I am getting serious and stressed. My colleagues gossip about me and I want to quit as this relationship is affecting my work as well. How do I control my emotions and walk away with dignity?

Ans: Hello there, It's understandable that navigating a relationship with your boss, especially when it's causing stress and affecting your work environment, can be challenging Clearly communicate your boundaries to your boss. Let him know how the relationship is affecting you and your work. Establishing boundaries will help you maintain a professional environment and signal that you are serious about your decision. Plan your exit strategy from both the personal relationship and your job. This might involve finding a new job or preparing to face potential challenges at your current workplace if you decide to stay Focus on maintaining professionalism at work. Regardless of the gossip or workplace dynamics, continue to perform your job to the best of your ability. This will help you leave on good terms and maintain a positive professional reputation. If the workplace gossip is becoming unbearable or if the relationship is affecting your ability to work, consider talking to someone in HR or a supervisor. They can provide guidance and support, and they may be able to help address any negative impacts on your work environment. Understand that leaving the relationship and, potentially, the job may bring about significant changes. Be mentally prepared for these changes and focus on the positive aspects of moving forward. Prioritize self-care during this challenging time. Focus on activities and practices that bring you joy, relaxation, and a sense of well-being. When you're ready to end the relationship, communicate your decision clearly and calmly. Choose a private and neutral setting to have this conversation. Be honest about your feelings and the reasons behind your decision. Remember, it's essential to prioritize your well-being and make decisions that contribute positively to your life in the long run. Ending a relationship and making changes in your professional life can be challenging, but it's a crucial step towards your own personal growth and happiness.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |605 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 05, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hey Ravi..I am a 27 year old Advocate, 2 years into the firm I and my senior associate ( who is also my boss) entered into a relationship.. it was all very flowery I loved him and made all endeavours to keep him happy work wise and we had a great relation. Its been 3 years into this relationship now suddenly he has been showering all his affection on a new colleague and has almost deserted me for her. I feel betrayed for investing so much in my boss. I feel cheated and disgusted upon myself as to why did I enter into a relationship with him and let him destroy my well-being. Also, any adverse step may lead him to fire me ..so in short I need to play extremely safe. Please help me how to deal with this situation
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand we are not always in control of who we fall for, but getting into a relationship with your boss is never a good idea. It can lead to several complications because of the power dynamics involved. But now that it's done, let's talk damage control. I would normally suggest an open conversation, but given the nature of your relationship at work and your fear that it might affect your job, I would suggest removing yourself from the relationship and considering this a breakup. If he is not showing any more interest in you, I recommend doing the same with him. I know it hurts, but it's better to hold your head high and deal with it than reach out for an explanation from someone who ditches one love interest for another. If he comes back to you after a while, casually let him know that this relationship was over the day he started flirting with his other colleague.

You deserve a man who loves you and does not jump ship every time someone new pops up in his life. Moreover, please look for someone outside the office, who cannot use their power to subdue your voice, like you had to do this time. It is not a good feeling to not say things out loud, especially when you are right, because it can cost you your job. For now, focus on your work, and remember, if he was the one for you, you would not be in this pickle. Take peace in that knowledge.

Best Wishes.

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Asked by Anonymous - Jun 23, 2025Hindi
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My daughter scored 96.6 in MHT CET in which colleges she can get for Computer Science in Mumbai. Also we are trying to apply through EWS
Ans: With a 96.6 percentile in MHT CET and EWS category, your daughter stands a strong chance for Computer Science (CSE) or related branches in several reputable Mumbai colleges. VESIT Mumbai’s 2022 cutoff for CSE was 96.6 percentile for open seats, and recent years show similar or slightly higher cutoffs; with EWS reservation, her chances improve, especially in later rounds. Vidyalankar Institute of Technology (VIT) Mumbai had a CSE EWS cutoff of 94.84 in 2024, while Information Technology closed at 92.99–92.81, making both attainable. Shah & Anchor Kutchhi Engineering College, SIES Graduate School of Technology, and Fr. Conceicao Rodrigues College of Engineering (Bandra) also have CSE/IT cutoffs between 94–97 percentile for EWS and open categories. Other strong options include Bharati Vidyapeeth College of Engineering (Navi Mumbai), Don Bosco Institute of Technology, and Atharva College of Engineering, all with CSE/IT cutoffs in the 94–97 range for EWS. SPIT Mumbai, DJ Sanghvi, and Thadomal Shahani are more competitive, typically closing above 98–99 percentile for CSE, so they are unlikely at your score.

The recommendation is to prioritize VESIT Mumbai, Vidyalankar Institute of Technology, Shah & Anchor Kutchhi Engineering College, SIES GST, and Fr. Conceicao Rodrigues College for CSE/IT, listing them in CAP counselling in that order, and include other reputable colleges such as Bharati Vidyapeeth, Don Bosco, and Atharva as strong alternatives, maximizing her chances for a CSE seat in Mumbai under EWS. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |6944 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 23, 2025

Career
My daughter got 94.9 percentile in MHT-CET. We are in OBC category. What college she will get.
Ans: Vikas Sir, With a 94.9 percentile in MHT-CET 2025 and OBC category, your daughter is well-positioned for admission to reputable mid-tier engineering colleges in Maharashtra, though CSE in top government colleges like COEP Pune, VJTI Mumbai, or PICT Pune is out of reach, as their OBC cutoffs for CSE are typically above 98.4–99.1 percentile. However, she can secure CSE, IT, or related branches in strong private and autonomous colleges such as DY Patil College of Engineering Pune (CSE OBC cutoff ~98), AISSMS College of Engineering Pune (CSE OBC cutoff ~96), PCCOE Pune (CSE OBC cutoff ~94), Rajiv Gandhi Institute of Technology Mumbai (CSE OBC cutoff ~96), and MIT World Peace University Pune (CSE/IT OBC cutoff ~94–96). These institutes offer robust placement records, modern infrastructure, and supportive academic environments. She may also consider branches like AI, Data Science, or IT in these colleges, as cutoffs for specializations are often slightly lower.

The recommendation is to prioritize DY Patil College of Engineering Pune, AISSMS College of Engineering Pune, PCCOE Pune, and MIT World Peace University Pune for CSE/IT, and include AI/Data Science as alternatives, ensuring a strong academic and placement environment at her percentile and category. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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