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Should I Move Away from My Family After Class 12th?

Radheshyam Zanwar |6731 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Aug 03, 2024

Radheshyam Zanwar is the founder of Zanwar Classes which prepares aspirants for competitive exams such as MHT-CET, IIT-JEE and NEET-UG.
Based in Aurangabad, Maharashtra, it provides coaching for Class 10 and Class 12 students as well.
Since the last 25 years, Radheshyam has been teaching mathematics to Class 11 and Class 12 students and coaching them for engineering and medical entrance examinations.
Radheshyam completed his civil engineering from the Government Engineering College in Aurangabad.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 02, 2024Hindi

Career

I HAD JUST COMPLETED MY CLASS 12TH WITH SCIENCE STREAM AND I AM ABOUT TO JOIN COLLEGE BUT TODAY I GOT A THOUGHT THAT SHOULD I MOVE OUT , AWAY FROM MY FAMILY ?..I BELONGED TO A GUJARATI FAMILY LIVING IN SURAT..I JUST WANT TO ASK IS IT IS GOOD TO MOVE AWAY FROM FAMILY TO LIVE ALONELY.. SOMETIMES I THOUGHT THAT WHY TO LEAVE HOMETOWN TO LIVE IN METRO CITIES..MY FATHER IS A BUSINESSMAN AND MY ENTIRE RELATIVES LIVES IN SURAT..I THINKS I SHOULD SETTLE IN MY HOMETOWN AS IT WILL BE GOOD FOR ME FINANCIALLY AND MENTALLY..BUT I WANT ADVICE THAT IS I AM THINKING RIGHT OR NOT ? PLEASE HELP ME I AM VERY TENSED ABD WORRIED ABOUT MY FUTURE

Ans: Hi. You are thinking wrong. Your thoughts are not practical. Along with you, your family members will come under huge tension from a single wrong step. First, you talk to a family person, whom you trust more. If you do not, then talk with a psychiatrist or a counselor.

Radheshyam Zanwar, Aurangabad (MS)

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I am 39ys old and working as software engg in Bangalore.I live with my wife and 2kids.. I am normally very minimalist.. my office working hybrid model and i stay in rental house... Still I not bought any flat..son studying 2nd younger one is pre school ,my wife is home maker ..I have confused.. regarding plan to move home town near city..which south part of tamilndau..leaving banglore or staying here .. due to I am always feeling job insecure . And kids will learn mother tongue but afraid about is it good decision any one suggest me pls.

Ans: It's important to think practically not panic and preempt,something out of nothing ... insecurity in your job creeps in out of various situations, understand what's triggering that, address the problem, don't jump from frying pan to fire.

The current Hybrid model means you need to report to the office atleast 2 days a week, what's your travel & stay plan,from home town to Bangalore, will you really save...or spend more?

Learning mother tongue is from mother n no need to relocate..!?
Be grateful for the equal opportunity Bangalore gives people from all over India, pick up your performance, don't look for shortcuts.

Ask your wife to do a work from home job or take tuitions at home,to supplement the income, if the need be!?

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 19, 2024Hindi

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Hello Guru g, I am a merchant Navy professional, I have just married, But things in my family were not good before my marriage and after marriage the things are same , like fights of my mother with my grandmother, my father and mother fights, there is a toxic environment in my house, my time I have tried to neutralise the things but I can't change them it's in there basic nature, I don't want to live anymore with my parents, because in Village people all-around fill their minds with different things and they bing it to our house , because some people here can't see us growing, so I have decided that I will not live here, Then I left with two options either I move to city or go abroad, of I choose the first one then how would I convince my parents to go to city with them, what should I tell them so that they also didn't get hurt and allow me to take this step and also how can I find a good society because we are newly married couple and security is my main concern because I am very afraid of cities because there criminal activities are more than villages , and If I choose the 2nd option then I have to spend a lot of money but I wanted to do business in India because there is a lot of scope here and expenses to live a life is less here, so kindly help me take decision, I will be very thankful to you .

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You don't prefer the 'toxicity'!
You are afraid of big cities as criminal activities are more than the cities!
Your parents may not move in to the city but you also find the environment they are in toxic!
You feel some people can't see you growing!
You don't prefer going abroad as you want to business in India!

Can you see how you have restricted yourself? This is called having a dream BUT clipping one's own wings. How can you make a decision when there are so many self-imposed constraints?
I suggest:
- Drop down all the options possible
- List down the pros and cons of each
- Choose the one that is financially viable
- Let your parents choose where they want to live

You have just started your family life; focus on what's best from a growth perspective...take decisions that help your marriage and career grow...And oh, you can choose to see the crime in the city OR you can choose to see opportunities...where is your focus?

All the best!
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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Asked by Anonymous - Jul 07, 2024Hindi

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I want to ask one general question...In India majority of the people starts moving away from their parents after completing 12th for college and after that they get jobs at different metro cities and they get settled their...Is it is good ? My condition is that my father had a business and I am living a good life..Should I move out of comfort zone for further studies ?. I have not problem in studying away from parents but I don't like that living away from parents system for the rest of the life just for doing job....Am I right about this thinking? Please guide me !

Ans: Do what you feel is right. As per my opinion, if you want to grow as a person you should sometimes move out of your comfort zone. If you get a better college or better education then you can leave your family and take up better education and then can return back to your family post that. Anyways everyone has different priorities. Do what you feel is correct.

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Question by SUJAL - Aug 15, 2024Hindi

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Sir I am currently in 12th PCM preparing for jee...I BELONGED to a business family...I had think about some field in which I want to work like education sector,IT sector and finance sector..But I don't want to do job for very long period of time..After some years of job I may start something of my own...Due to continuously living in a isolated environment I have become a darpon...Always my heart beats up when new things faces me..I am a overthinker also due to which I am unable to study properly...I have no confidence in myself...I wanted to settled in Gujarat only but I have no problem living outside for few years...

Ans: Hi. Thanks for contacting us again. I think, you need a personal counselor to whom can talk across the table and then he would suggest the path that will be most suitable for you.

If you still have any queries left in your mind, please feel free to contact us again. You are most welcome.

If you found this suggestion helpful, please consider following me.

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Dear Sir, I did my BTech from a normal engineering college not very famous. The teaching was not great and hence i did not study well. I tried my best to learn coding including all the technologies like html,css,javascript,react js,dba,php because i wanted to be a web developer But nothing seem to enter my head except html and css. I don't understand a language which has more complexities. Is it because of my lack of experience or not devoting enough time. I am not sure. I did many courses online and tried to do diplomas also abroad which i passed somehow. I recently joined android development course because i like apps but the teaching was so fast that i could not memorize anything. There was no time to even take notes down. During the course i did assignments and understood the code because i have to pass but after the course is over i tend to forget everything. I attempted a lot of interviews. Some of them i even got but could not perform well so they let me go. Now due to the AI booming and job markets in a bad shape i am re-thinking whether to keep studying or whether its just time waste. Since 3 years i am doing labour type of jobs which does not yield anything to me for survival and to pay my expenses. I have the quest to learn everything but as soon as i sit in front of the computer i listen to music or read something else. What should i do to stay more focused? What should i do to make myself believe confident. Is there still scope of IT in todays world? Kindly advise.

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Please be assured, AGE isn't a barrier for implants. But overall health is a factor. Your dentist will assess your bone density, gum health, and general medical history before he places your implants.

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My 12 year old son has 2 parallel lines of teeth. One front and the other behind. So far in the behind only 2 teeths are there one in each side. Will this cause any serious issues for him? He has speech problem. Could this be the reason? Does he need to take any immediate corrective procedure?

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Hello Sir/Mam, Currently I'm investing in SIP as per below for the last 3 years, my goal is to achieve 2 crores by the next 10 years. Please suggest me if these MFs are good or any rebalancing is required. I'm planning to increase the SIP by 10% each year. Parag Parikh Flexi Cap - 5K Aditya Birla SF BAF - 2K SBI Large & Midcap - 5K Quant Small Cap - 3K SBI Gold Fund - Growth - 5K Canara Robeco Large cap - 5K Thanks.

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Your portfolio is well-allocated across flexicap, large & midcap, small cap, BAF and gold, offering a balanced mix of growth, stability and diversification.

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My married ex still texts me for comfort. Because of him, I am unable to move on. He makes me feel guilty by saying he got married out of family pressure. His dad is a cardiac patient and mom is being treated for cancer. He comforts me by saying he will get separated soon and we will get married because he only loves me. We have been in a relationship for 14 years and despite everything we tried, his parents refused to accept me, so he chose to get married to someone who understands our situation. I don't know when he will separate from his wife. She knows about us too but she comes from a traditional family. She also confirmed there is no physical intimacy between them. I trust him, but is it worth losing my youth for him? Honestly, I am worried and very confused.

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I understand how difficult it is to let go of a relationship you have built from scratch, but is it really how you want to continue? It really seems to be going nowhere. His parents are already in bad health and he married someone else for their happiness. Does it seem like he will be able to leave her? So many people’s happiness and lives depend on this one decision. I think it’s about time you and your BF have a clear conversation about the same. If he can’t give a proper timeline, please try to understand his situation. But also make sure he understands yours and maybe rethink this equation. It really isn’t healthy. You deserve a love you can have wholly, and not just in pieces, and in the shadows.

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Asked by Anonymous - Dec 02, 2025Hindi

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Hi Anu, My husband doesn't do house chores. We both work full-time, but I still end up cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry. When I ask for help, my partner will say, ‘Just tell me what to do,’ but then he conveniently forgets. Maybe he doesn't like it or he is genuinely forgetful. I have tried many ways to make him explain. Once I only did my share of laundry to make him realise but he simply ignored. Every week this pattern repeats. Is this normal? How can married couples divide responsibilities fairly to avoid fights?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Every home has a different routine and share of responsibilities. So, there's no standard norm to challenge it as normal or not!
So, if you want your husband to pitch in, then say it in clear terms, especially since he has told you to tell him what to do.
Once you have told him, do make sure to ask him: Will you find it convenient to do it now or later? If later, when?
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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 04, 2025

Question by Santosh - Oct 20, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Feeling alone in the world and iam not having any close friends everybody is busy with their works and family, help me what to do

Ans: Dear Santosh,
Everybody has a life and so do you; build your life the way that you want...
Start attending weekend events or any social gathering in the city/town that you live in; even a smile or a hi, hello can be start to a good association when you can further discuss and chat on mutual interests and hobbies.
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All the best!
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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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