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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |676 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 20, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025
Relationship

my mom and dad knows about me and my boyfriend .. me and my bf have never had anything sexual or something ever . but my mom the other day saw a pic of him and me in which he had his hand on my waist ans she had it up all against me she started saying all those mean thing and comparing me with the other girls who become physical in relationship . what do i do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are in a tricky situation. First, let's acknowledge that couples who decide to get intimate are not "bad." Their choice is just different from yours. You can try to explain the same to your mother- though it will be tough, everyone needs to understand this. Secondly, in this situation, all you can do is let her know that her upbringing will never allow you to lie to your mom or cross boundaries that will hurt her and your dad. This way, you might be able to regain her trust.
Best Wishes.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 26, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 15, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
I have been dating a guy since last year and we are serious about each other. Our families know about us and are quite accepting towards our relationship. But there is a problem idk what to do. I'm single child and my father passed 10 years ago so its just me and my mom. I cant just leave her after marriage. I want all of us ( me my bf his parents and my mother ) to stay together after our marriage but he says that his parents will have a problem with it. Idk what to do i just cant leave my mother but i also love this guy.
Ans: It's understandable that you're facing a challenging situation with conflicting priorities. Balancing your commitment to your mother and your love for your boyfriend can be difficult, but open communication and compromise are essential in such casesTalk about your expectations for family life after marriage. Understand what he envisions and what compromises can be made to accommodate both your wishes. This may involve discussing living arrangements, responsibilities, and boundariesIf possible, involve both families in the discussion. Sometimes, concerns can be addressed more effectively when everyone is aware of each other's perspectives. This can also help in finding common ground and building mutual understanding. finding a solution that respects both families and allows for a harmonious marriage may take time and effort. Patience, understanding, and compromise are key. It's important to create an environment where both you and your boyfriend feel heard and valued.
Ultimately, the decision should be based on what feels right for both of you as a couple. Consider what compromises are reasonable and whether there are creative solutions that can satisfy both your desire to care for your mother and your commitment to your relationship.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 06, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
hii im 18 yrs old ..my parents found out about my bf.. actually they have caught me 5 to 6 times and always told me to leave him.. and i used to leave him but after sometime we again get reunited .. my parents have snatched my phone and telling me whether to choose them or my bf.. they are telling me to live in their house according to them otherwise i should leave their house.. i love both of them so much i got my bf after lot of struggles and fights .. i dont know what should i do..my bf is also from another religion and now my parents are telling me that they will not let me study further and will take me to my hometown forever and will get me married their with someone else
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
At 18 when you are still emotionally immature and financially not yet stable, what else do you expect your parents to do?
They are doing what they think is the right thing for you to keep you safe. My suggestion would be to focus on what must matter to you most at this age; your studies...put down your goals and stick to them...
As cruel as it may seem to you that the whole world is against your association with the boy, remember that you have a life ahead of you that will give you the necessary space for such a relationship...so work towards yourself first, so that when you actually get into a relationship, you know that it is right for you!
Right now, you know that your parents may very well pull you out from studies and there goes your dreams of a better future...So, please stop being foolish and step up for yourself and do what's right for you!

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 18, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 17, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Mam i am in relationship for 9 years now..he became my boyfriend when i shifted in my new house he was my neighbour..i was in 10th when i got caught and since then my parents hate my boyfriend , i apologized to my parents then and said to have no contact with my boyfriend but 9 years down the lane ..we are totally connected and living a peaceful healthy relationship..my parents hate my boyfriend and his family to the core..my relationship with ny parents are.mixed someday they will be super nice to me , another day they will abuse me for evn small things..we have ups and down in our relationship but i love them a lott , i want to care of them in their old age..but at this point i want to talk to them about my boyfriend but seeinng that they hate him so much i am literally very very afraid that my parents will hate me to their core knowing about someone i want to marry whoom they hate soo much ..... i don't know how will they react .. i am been through physcial and verbal abuse earlier too but i don't know how much worse it can get this time..for them the girl who marry their parents choice is the best in the world..my boyfriend and i have no caste issue its just the ego issues with my parents they think karrying into that house they will never able to have good enough respect though my mother and his mother talk..but that too my mother bitch a lott about her mother for even nonsensical things..i am 24 now and preparing for government exam ...i am soo much stress knowing i have to choose between my love or my parents.....i think so even if i marry him with their superficail consent they will never be happy woth me..and can even cut contacts with me...i don't know what to do i have no elder in my house to make parents explain...mam plss show me some path
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
No where have you mentioned what your boyfriend does for a living? Could this be the reason that your parents refuse to acknowledge your relationship?
Parents want the best for their children but at times their own beliefs on love marriages etc can come in the way. Since you are an adult, it is time to actually start acting like one. My suggestion is to have a conversation with them and understand the reason for their refusal to accept your boyfriend. If it is one of society and family objection, then you know how to handle it BUT if their concern is more about his character or his job, you both need to make an effort to take away that concern so that they accept all this wholeheartedly.
Find the reason and things will become clearer as to how you must handle the situation.

All the best!

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |676 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
i’m 18 and live in the states and basically my parents have known i have a boyfriend for a while now thru their own snooping and my mom has even told me once or twice that she knows about him but today I was trying to go out this morning to a outting with two friends and him and they asked who is coming and if he is coming and then my dad got really angry and started saying things like “you want me to get you married now” and that we were acting like husband and wife because he saw that i have a picture of us in my wallet also for some context he is chinese but he’s the topper of my grade of 500+ students incredibly smart and just perfect guy all around. i don’t want to break up with him, what should i do?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand that maintaining a relationship when parents disapprove can be very tricky. But you must also understand that their worries come from love for you; you might be an adult but you are still their child. Having said that, let's see some practical ways to deal with this-
- Understanding what's worrying them can help you give them a solution that might work in your favor. Their concerns can stem from cultural expectations. They might be concerned about your safety. Figuring out their concern will help you better navigate the situation.
- Communicate your feelings. Don't get mad when they express their opinions. It won't help your case. Find the right time to discuss this with your parents. And make them feel heard. Their concerns can give you a new perspective too.
- Highlight your partner's positive traits like his academic achievements. And focus on your studies too. If your parents see that he is a positive influence on you, they might reconsider their stand.
- When the time is right, introduce him to your parents. Seeing him in person will humanize him.
- Strike a balance. Your relationship should not interfere with your relationship with your parents or hamper your studies.

Most importantly, be patient. These things take time. You are too young to be so bothered.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10876 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 09, 2025

Money
Im aged 40 years and my husband is aged 48 years. We have one son aged 8 years and daughter aged 12 years. We both are in business. What should be the ideal corpus to meet their education at the age of 18 years for both children? Present business income we can save Rs.50000 pm
Ans: You are thinking early. That itself is a smart step. Many parents postpone planning and later struggle with loans. You are not in that situation. So appreciate your approach.

You asked about ideal corpus for higher education. Education cost is rising fast. So planning early avoids financial pressure later.

You have two kids. Your daughter is 12. Your son is 8. You have around six years for your daughter and around ten years for your son. With this time frame, you need a proper structured plan.

» Understanding Future Education Cost

Education inflation in India is high. It is increasing year after year. Even professional courses are becoming costly. College fees, hostel fees, books, digital tools and transportation also add cost.

You need to consider this inflation. Higher education cost will not remain at today’s value. It will grow.

So if today a standard undergraduate program costs around a few lakhs, in six to ten years the cost may go much higher. That is why estimating corpus should consider this future cost.

You don’t need exact numbers today. You need a target range to plan. A comfortable range gives clarity.

» Typical Cost Structure for Higher Education

Higher education cost depends on:

– Private or government institution
– Course type
– City or abroad option
– Duration

For engineering, medical, management or technology courses, cost goes higher. For government colleges the cost is lower but seats are limited. Private colleges are more accessible but expensive.

So planning based only on government college assumption may create funding gaps. Planning based on private college range gives safer margin.

» Suggested Corpus for Both Children

For your daughter, considering next six years gap and inflation, a target range should be higher. For your son, you have more time. So his corpus can grow better because compounding works more with time.

For a comfortable education corpus that covers most course possibilities, many families plan for a higher number. It gives flexibility to choose better college without stress.

So you can aim for a larger goal for both children like this:

– Daughter: Target a strong education fund for next six years
– Son: Target a similar or slightly higher fund for the next ten years because future costs may be higher

You may not need the whole amount if your child chooses a less expensive route. But having extra cushion gives peace.

» Your Savings Ability

You mentioned you can save Rs.50000 monthly. That is a strong saving capacity. But this saving should not go entirely to a single goal. You will also need future retirement planning, emergency fund and other life goals.

Still, a reasonable portion of this amount can be allocated towards education planning. Some families divide savings based on urgency and time horizon. Since daughter’s goal is near, she may need a more stable allocation.

Your son’s goal is long term. So his part can stay in growth asset for longer.

» Choosing the Right Investment Style

A long term goal like your son’s education needs equity exposure. Equity gives better potential for long term growth. It beats inflation better than fixed deposits.

But for your daughter, pure equity can create risk because goal is nearer. Market fluctuations may affect final corpus. So she needs a balanced asset mix.

So investment approach must be different for both.

» Asset Allocation Strategy

For your daughter with six year horizon:

– Higher allocation to a balanced type category
– Some allocation to equity through diversified categories
– Step down equity allocation in final three years

This structure protects capital in later years.

For your son with ten year horizon:

– Higher equity allocation at start
– Continue systematic investing
– Reduce risk allocation gradually closer to goal period

This helps growth and protection.

» Avoiding Wrong Investment Products

Parents often buy traditional insurance plans or children policies for education. These policies give low returns. They lock money and reduce wealth creation potential.

So avoid purely insurance based products for education goals. Insurance is separate. Investment is separate. This separation creates clarity and better growth.

If you already hold any ULIP or investment insurance product, it may not be efficient. Only if you have such policies then you may review and consider if surrender is needed and reinvest in mutual funds. If you don’t have such policies, no need to worry.

» Role of Actively Managed Mutual Funds

For long term goals, actively managed mutual funds offer better flexibility and expert management. They are designed to outperform inflation. A regular plan through a mutual fund distributor with CFP support helps with guidance. They also track your goal and give advice in volatile phases.

Direct funds look cheaper on expense ratio. But they lack advisory support. Long term investors often make emotional mistakes in direct investing. They stop SIPs or switch wrong schemes. So advisory backed investing avoids costly behaviour mistakes.

Index funds look simple and low cost. But they only follow the market. They don’t protect during corrections. There is no strategy or research. Actively managed funds adjust holdings based on market research and valuation. For life goals like education, smoother growth and strategy are needed.

So regular plan with advisory support helps you avoid unnecessary emotional decisions.

» Importance of Systematic Investing

A fixed monthly SIP gives discipline. It also benefits from market volatility. When markets fall, SIP buys more units. In rise phase, the value grows.

A structured SIP helps both goals. For daughter, SIP should shift towards low volatility funds slowly. For son, SIP can run longer in growth-oriented funds before reducing risk.

Your contribution amount may change based on future business income. But start now with whatever comfortable.

» Protecting the Goal With Insurance

Since you both are running business, income stability may fluctuate. So ensuring life security is important. Term insurance is the right option. It is low cost and high coverage.

This ensures child’s education is protected even if income stops.

Medical insurance also matters. A medical emergency should not break education savings.

» Reviewing the Plan Periodically

A fixed plan is good. But markets and life conditions change. So review once every twelve months.

Points to review:

– Are SIPs running on time?
– Is allocation suitable for goal year?
– Any need to shift from equity to safer category?
– Any tax planning advantage needed?

But avoid checking portfolio every week. Frequent checking creates stress.

» Education Goal Withdrawal Plan

As the daughter’s goal comes close:

– Stop SIP in high risk category
– Start shifting profit to debt type fund over systematic transfers
– Keep final year money in safe option like liquid category

Same formula should be applied for your son when his goal approaches.

This protects against last minute market crash.

» Emotional Side of Planning

Education is an emotional goal. Parents feel pressure to provide the best. But planning removes fear.

Saving consistently gives confidence. Having a plan helps avoid panic decisions. It also brings clarity of future expense.

This planning sets financial discipline for your children as well.

» Taxation Factors

When redeeming funds for education, tax rules will apply. For equity fund withdrawals, long term capital gains above exemption are taxed at 12.5% as per current rules. For short term within one year, tax is higher.

For debt investments, gains are taxed as per your tax slab.

So plan the withdrawal timing to reduce tax.

Tax planning near goal year is very important.

» What You Can Do Next

– Start separate investments for each child
– Use SIP for disciplined investing
– Choose growth-oriented asset for son
– Choose balanced and phased investment approach for daughter
– Review allocation yearly
– Protect the goal with insurance cover

Following these steps helps achieve the target corpus smoothly.

» Finally

You are already thinking in the right direction. You have time for both goals. You also have a good saving frequency. So you can build a strong education fund without stress.

Your children’s future will be secure if you continue with a structured and disciplined plan.

Stay consistent with your savings. Make investment choices carefully. Review and adjust calmly over time.

This journey will help you reach your ideal corpus for both children.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10876 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 09, 2025Hindi
Money
Hi Sir, Regarding recent turmoils in global economic situation and trends, Trump's tariffs, relentless FII selling, should I be worried about midcap, large&midcap funds that I have in my mutual fund portfolio? I have been investing from last 4 years and want to invest for next 10 years only. And then plan to retire and move to SWP. I'm targeting a 10%-11% return eventually. And I don't want to make lower returns than FD's. Is now the time to switch from midcap, laege&midcap to conservative, large, flexi funds? Please suggest.
Ans: You have asked the right question at the right time. Many investors panic only after damage happens. You are thinking ahead. That is a strong habit.

You also have clarity about your goal, time horizon and expected returns. This mindset will help you handle market noise better.

» Current Market Sentiment and Global Events
The global economy is seeing stress. There are trade decisions, tariff announcements, and geopolitical issues. Foreign institutional investors are selling. News flow looks negative.
These events can cause short term volatility. Midcaps and small caps usually react faster during these phases. Even large caps show some stress.
But markets have seen many crises in the past. Elections, governments, conflicts, pandemics, financial crashes and tariff wars are not new events. Markets always recover over time.
Short term movements are unpredictable. Long term wealth creation depends more on patience and asset allocation.

» Your Time Horizon Matters More Than Market Noise
You have been investing for 4 years. You plan to invest for the next 10 years. That means your remaining maturity is long term.
For a 10 year goal, equity is suitable. Midcap and large and midcap funds are designed for long term investors. They are not meant for short periods.
If your time horizon is short, it is valid to worry about downside risk. But with 10 more years ahead, temporary volatility is normal and expected.
Short term fear should not drive long term decisions.

» Should You Switch to Conservative or Large Cap Now?
Switching based on panic or temporary news is not ideal. When you switch now, you lock the current lower value permanently. You also miss the recovery phase.
Large cap and flexi cap funds offer stability. But they also deliver lower growth potential during bull runs compared to midcaps.
Midcaps usually fall deeper when markets drop. But they also recover faster and often outperform in the next cycle.
Switching now may protect emotions but may reduce long term wealth creation.

» Target Return of 10% to 11% is Reasonable
Aiming for 10%-11% return with a 10 year investment horizon is realistic.
Fixed deposits now offer around 6.5% to 7.5%. After tax, the return becomes lower.
Equity funds have potential to generate better returns compared to FD over a long tenure. Midcap allocation contributes to this return potential.
So moving fully to conservative funds may reduce your ability to beat inflation comfortably.

» Impact of FII Selling
FII selling creates pressure on the market. But domestic investors including SIP flows are strong today. India is seeing strong structural growth.
Retail investors, mutual funds and systematic flows act as stabilizers.
FII selling is temporary and cyclical. It is not a permanent trend.

» Economic Slowdowns Create Opportunities
Corrections make valuations reasonable. This can benefit long term SIP investors.
During downturns, your SIP buys more units. During recovery, these units grow.
This mechanism works best in volatile categories like midcaps.
Stopping SIP or switching during dips blocks this benefit.

» Midcap Cycles Are Natural
Midcap funds move in cycles. They have phases of strong growth followed by correction. The correction phase is painful but temporary.
Every cycle contributes to future upside. Staying invested during all phases is important.
Many investors exit during downturns and enter again after markets rise. This behaviour produces lower returns than the mutual fund performance.

» Role of Portfolio Balance
Instead of exiting fully, review your asset allocation. You can hold a mix of:
– Large cap
– Flexi cap
– Midcap
– Large and midcap
This gives stability and growth potential.
Midcap should not be more than a suitable percentage for your age and risk tolerance. Since you are 36, some meaningful midcap exposure is fine.
If midcap exposure is very high, you can reduce slightly and move that portion to flexi cap or large cap funds slowly through a systematic transfer. Do not do a lump sum shift during panic.

» Behavioural Discipline Matters More Than Fund Selection
Market cycles test investor patience. Consistency in SIP and holding through declines builds wealth.
Most investors do not fail due to bad funds. They fail due to fear-based decisions.
Your approach should be systematic, not emotional.

» Do Not Compare with FD Frequently
FD gives predictable return. Equity gives volatile but higher potential return.
Comparing FD returns every time the market falls leads to wrong decisions.
FD is for safety. Equity is for growth. They serve different purposes.
Your retirement plan and SWP plan depends on growth. Only equity can provide that growth.

» Should You Change Strategy Because Retirement is 10 Years Away?
Now is not the time to exit growth segments. You are still in accumulation phase.
When you reach the last 3 years before retirement, then reducing equity exposure step by step is required.
At that stage, a glide path helps preserve gains. That time has not yet come.
So continue building wealth now.

» Market Timings and Shifts Rarely Work
Many investors try to predict markets. Most of them fail.
Switching based on news looks logical. But news and market timing rarely align.
Staying consistent with your asset allocation gives better results than frequent changes.

» Portfolio Review Approach
You can follow these steps:
– Continue SIPs in all categories
– Avoid stopping based on short term fears
– If midcap allocation is above comfort level, shift only small portion gradually
– Review allocation once in a year, not every month
This structured approach prevents emotional decisions.

» Tax Rules Matter When Switching
Switching between equity funds involves tax impact.
Short term capital gains tax is higher.
Long term capital gains above the exemption limit are taxed at 12.5%.
Switching without purpose can create avoidable tax leakage.
This reduces your compounding.

» When to Worry?
You need to reconsider only if:
– Your goal horizon becomes short
– Your risk appetite changes
– Your allocation becomes unbalanced
Not because of headlines or temporary corrections.

» Your Retirement SWP Plan
Once your accumulation phase is completed, you can shift to:
– Conservative hybrid
– Flexi cap
– Balanced allocation
This will support a smoother SWP.
But this transition should happen only closer to the retirement start date. Not now.

» SIP is Designed for Turbulent Years
SIP works best when markets are volatile. The hardest years for emotions are the most powerful for compounding.
Your long term discipline is your strategy.
Do not interrupt it.

» What You Should Do Now
– Stay invested
– Continue SIP
– Avoid panic selling
– Review allocation once a year
– Use a steady plan, not reactions
This will help you reach your target return range.

» Finally
You are on the right path. The current volatility is temporary. Your 10 year horizon gives enough time for recovery and growth.
Switching right now based on fear may reduce your future returns. Staying invested and continuing SIPs is the sensible approach.
Your goal of better return than FD is realistic. Equity can deliver that with patience.
Stay calm and systematic.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |6739 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Dec 09, 2025

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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