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Anu

Anu Krishna  |832 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 18, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Apr 17, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Mam i am in relationship for 9 years now..he became my boyfriend when i shifted in my new house he was my neighbour..i was in 10th when i got caught and since then my parents hate my boyfriend , i apologized to my parents then and said to have no contact with my boyfriend but 9 years down the lane ..we are totally connected and living a peaceful healthy relationship..my parents hate my boyfriend and his family to the core..my relationship with ny parents are.mixed someday they will be super nice to me , another day they will abuse me for evn small things..we have ups and down in our relationship but i love them a lott , i want to care of them in their old age..but at this point i want to talk to them about my boyfriend but seeinng that they hate him so much i am literally very very afraid that my parents will hate me to their core knowing about someone i want to marry whoom they hate soo much ..... i don't know how will they react .. i am been through physcial and verbal abuse earlier too but i don't know how much worse it can get this time..for them the girl who marry their parents choice is the best in the world..my boyfriend and i have no caste issue its just the ego issues with my parents they think karrying into that house they will never able to have good enough respect though my mother and his mother talk..but that too my mother bitch a lott about her mother for even nonsensical things..i am 24 now and preparing for government exam ...i am soo much stress knowing i have to choose between my love or my parents.....i think so even if i marry him with their superficail consent they will never be happy woth me..and can even cut contacts with me...i don't know what to do i have no elder in my house to make parents explain...mam plss show me some path

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
No where have you mentioned what your boyfriend does for a living? Could this be the reason that your parents refuse to acknowledge your relationship?
Parents want the best for their children but at times their own beliefs on love marriages etc can come in the way. Since you are an adult, it is time to actually start acting like one. My suggestion is to have a conversation with them and understand the reason for their refusal to accept your boyfriend. If it is one of society and family objection, then you know how to handle it BUT if their concern is more about his character or his job, you both need to make an effort to take away that concern so that they accept all this wholeheartedly.
Find the reason and things will become clearer as to how you must handle the situation.

All the best!
Asked on - Apr 27, 2024 | Answered on Apr 29, 2024
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Mam he is software enginneer getting handsome salary...the prblm is the ego issue....
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
As mentioned in my previous response:
My suggestion is to have a conversation with them (your parents) and understand the reason for their refusal to accept your boyfriend. If it is one of society and family objection, then you know how to handle it.
What is EGO?
It's nothing but each one defending their thoughts against the other person/s. In fact, you are also doing the same when you defend your boyfriend and perhaps find your parents unfair. Ego on both sides will only add to stress and the best way out of this is to actually TALK it out. And if that does not happen, well tough call then...

Find the reason for your parents' non-acceptance and things will become clearer as to how you must handle the situation.

All the best!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |832 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 04, 2022

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Hi Ma’am. I’m having a problem with my parents about my marriage. I’ve been in a relationship for three years and I want to marry him. My parents are not agreeing as it is a society issue because it is an interstate and inter-caste marriage. I'm trying to convince my parents for that since long time but it's going nowhere and they are too stubborn to even meet him once. What can I do in this situation? How can I deal with their emotional drama as a parent-child relationship should not break because of these issues? Kindly advise me, Ma’am. AS
Ans:

Dear AS,

You need to focus on how you can marry the person you love and also have your parents support you.

Is this possible?

There is a chance only if you take them into complete confidence and appeal to their logic.

Many societies are still against inter-caste marriages and I am sure they have their reasons for it, just like your parents have strong reasons to oppose the marriage.

Have you tried to find out why they oppose it? Are they worried about how they will face your family members as this is a big thing across cultures in the world?

As their daughter, you have connections with them as well as the right to live your life your way. Bring in an elder member of the family and ask him/her to appeal on your behalf. If this doesn’t work, you might be forced to decide one way or the other.

Whatever you do, do it with conviction and maintain relationships along the way. It may be an uphill task but breathe, smile and live life.

All the best, Happy 2022!

(more)
Anu

Anu Krishna  |832 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 19, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 02, 2023Hindi
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Hi Ma’am, My parents are not agreeing for my marriage with an intercaste marriage and this is not the first intercaste marriage one of cousin tried convincing their parents for 5 yrs but eventually gave up and opted for court marriage today they are very happy even their parents has also accepted the marriage. In my case , my parents are mocking me for my feelings and emotionally abusing me and have crossed all their limits. They know my boyfriend from class 10th and their family too but the only issue is with then what others will say . My mother called my boyfriend and kept on saying leave me alone and in return my boyfriend said aunty I know this is the big thing we will not take any drastic step and without your approval we will not get married and I’m willing to wait for your daughter even if it is waiting for for 5-6 yrs . We both are doing pretty good in our career we both have been so focused with out life. But after this call she kept on saying he’s very manipulative as he did not disrespect my mother and as a result of this my mother and father kept on harassing me by saying ill and foul words to me. They are so lost in their ego that I am suffering from 104 degree fever and they are ignoring this fact kept on saying foul words to me. My mother day and night she’s entering my room is saying Every second I’m giving you baddua ( wishing something bad happen to me) . I put forth my point but they are not in state of listening and somewhere very unhappy that I’m not financially dependent on them so they are keep bashing my job. I have stopped talking to them regarding this topic and just having very minimal conversation with them and I’m not misbehaving with them for this also they are scolding me they want to act normally and come sit with them.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Inter-faith marriages are still unaccepted in many societies and the challenges that come with it are not just with family acceptance but adapting and adjusting to different cultures, tastes etc...
Yes, on the one hand, love does not have any boundaries BUT massive changes in society have still not taken place to accept inter-faith marriages and your parents also belong to that very same society that hinders more than supports.
It has come down to a choice for you now!
Family or your Love?
If you choose Family, all will be well except you and your boyfriend. It will be giving up what you dreamed of together.
If you choose Love, you can of course live life on your terms but your family may vow to never see you again (it seems evident from all the vibes at your home).
Since, you are financially independent, you are in a better position to decide BUT it is going to be a decision that will leave someone unhappy. Who that is going to be and whether you can harden yourself with it is the question!
Now, Family and Love can go hand in hand only when both integrate which means an uphill task for both sides to negotiate, navigate and live in harmony. If this can be achieved by some neutral person bringing both sides together, please attempt this first before making a final decision. But make the choice soon, so there is a resolution either way.

All the best!
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Anu

Anu Krishna  |832 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 25, 2024Hindi
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Hi mam, actually I am having a trouble in my relationship. Me and my partner are from different castes but we love each other. Due to the fear of my parents I told him some days back that my parents will never agree for our marriage as he is one year younger than me, he is from different caste and we both are in the final stage of our professional course and have not gone for job yet. But we are unable to leave each other and keep on crying. Now I am thinking of talking about this to my parents once my exams are over in a couple of months because I'm already 24 and they will start looking for alliance for me. But my partner is like there's no problem on his side but he doesn't want me to hurt and ruin relationship with my parents due to this disclosure and says that its never going to happen with heavy emotions and teary eyes. I am also unable to control my emotions and tears. Please advise me on what to do please mam....
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well, your partner is being kind and thinking for you and your relationship with your parents. It is a nice trait to have to be empathetic but it may cost him the relationship. And he has taken this stance only because you have talked him about how fearful you are of your parents.
I guess instead of giving up like this, why don't the two of you sit down as adults and discuss how to talk to your parents and make this happen. When you act against what society and family set as norms, you should have expected something to go against the fairy tale event, right?
Since you did not set this tone in mind, now it's about taking the bull by the horns and finding what's the best solution. Why give up?

All the best!
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Love Guru

Love Guru   |187 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 15, 2024Hindi
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Hi..I just saw your page and found this is the right page where I can get answer.. I am so confused and so my thoughts coming in my mind and noone in my life which I can tell. However, I found you hopefully you'll get my answer I want to marry with my partner but he is not earning as much and I'm also earning but we both started our career in 2023. And my parents wants I should get Marry with someone and he is searching. But I told my parents that I love someone but the issue is he is not from my caste that is not the big issue main issue is that my partner belongs from very nuclear family like his mother and sister is there and noone is there in his family and my parents also saying the boy is not earning a good salary and noone is there in his family how will you be happy and I don't think so he is good for you.. but my partner loves me so much he loves me till 6 years and he waited for me also. My question is that for getting a married is all this stuff matters ? My parents is arising so many questions somehow she denied..should I convince to my parents or they are saying right ??
Ans: The salary is not a problem, if he doesn’t have misplaced ego about his wife earning more than him; some men are broad-minded enough to even be proud of their wives earning more. Nor is caste; love has no fixed faith. But this nuclear family business is a red flag; I would strictly advice not living under the same roof with his mother and sister. There is bound to be friction. Then relations sour and your marriage gets strained. If he is willing to step out from under their shadow and live separately with you, and the money-making is not an issue for him, you’re making the right choice of partner. If either of the above is not realistic, I would suggest you stop trying to convince your parents and listen to what they have to say.
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Shekhar

Shekhar Kumar  |111 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership, HR Expert - Answered on May 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 30, 2024Hindi
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Hi, I am a mechanical engineer and having been working in the field of power plant from last 12 years. I don't enjoy my work now and feel that I am not meant for this job as I see no growth in my career. I'm 36 now and can't think of anything new as I don't think I can't enter into a new field at this age. No one will prefer me. What should I do?
Ans: Feeling stuck in your current career path is a common experience, but it's important to remember that it's never too late to make a change. Take some time to reflect on your skills, interests, values, and strengths. Consider what aspects of your current job you enjoy and what you would like to do differently in your next career move. Research other career paths and industries that align with your interests and transferable skills. Look for opportunities where your mechanical engineering background and experience in power plants could be valuable, such as in renewable energy, sustainability, project management, or technical sales. Identify any gaps in your skills or knowledge that may be necessary for transitioning to a new field. Consider taking courses, certifications, or workshops to acquire new skills or enhance existing ones. Many online platforms offer flexible learning options that you can pursue while still working. Reach out to your professional network, including colleagues, mentors, former classmates, and industry contacts. Inform them of your career interests and ask for advice, informational interviews, or referrals to potential employers or opportunities in your desired field. Evaluate whether pursuing additional education, such as a master's degree or specialized certification, would be beneficial for your career transition. Some programs offer opportunities for mid-career professionals to gain new skills and credentials. Look for volunteer or internship opportunities in your target industry or field. This can be a valuable way to gain hands-on experience, expand your network, and test out whether a new career path is the right fit for you before making a full transition.
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Asked by Anonymous - Apr 28, 2024Hindi
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I'm 35 years having 9 years experience in the old generation pvt bank as an officer. Worked in different capacities at branch n back office. I have done global certificate in fraud detection n interested in pursuing my career in the fraud domain. N i don't see any opportunities in my current bank. Planning to switch other new generation bank.
Ans: Switching to a new generation bank to pursue a career in the fraud domain sounds like a promising move given your interest and expertise in fraud detection. Research new generation banks known for their focus on technology, innovation, and digital banking services. Look for banks that prioritize cybersecurity, fraud prevention, and risk management as part of their core business strategies. Leverage your professional network and connections to explore job opportunities in new generation banks. Reach out to former colleagues, mentors, and industry contacts for referrals and recommendations. Attend industry events, webinars, and seminars to expand your network. Evaluate your skills, experience, and knowledge in fraud detection and prevention. Highlight any specialized training, certifications, or relevant qualifications you have obtained in this field, such as the Global Certificate in Fraud Detection. Update your resume to highlight your experience, achievements, and skills related to fraud detection and prevention. Optimize your LinkedIn profile to showcase your expertise in this area and network with professionals in the fraud domain. Monitor job portals, company websites, and professional networking platforms for job openings in fraud detection, risk management, compliance, or cybersecurity roles within new generation banks. Tailor your job search to match your skills and career interests. Stay informed about the latest developments, regulations, and best practices in fraud detection and prevention. Consider pursuing additional certifications, training programs, or continuing education opportunities to enhance your knowledge and skills in this evolving field.
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Shekhar

Shekhar Kumar  |111 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership, HR Expert - Answered on May 01, 2024

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I had completed 2nd pu can if choose b.sc in Chemistry and botony how can I become forensic science student to get job in that department please tell
Ans: If you're interested in pursuing a career in forensic science after completing your B.Sc. in Chemistry and Botany, develop a strong foundation in scientific principles, analytical techniques, and laboratory skills through your coursework and practical experiences. Familiarize yourself with the methods and techniques used in forensic analysis, such as DNA analysis, toxicology, and crime scene investigation. Consider pursuing a Master's degree (M.Sc.) or a specialized postgraduate diploma or certificate program in forensic science or a related field after completing your B.Sc. This advanced education will provide you with the specialized knowledge and skills required for forensic science careers. Seek opportunities to gain practical experience in forensic science through internships, research projects, or volunteer work. Look for opportunities to work in forensic laboratories, research institutes, or government agencies involved in forensic investigations. If possible, choose a specialization within forensic science that aligns with your interests and career goals, such as forensic chemistry, forensic biology, forensic toxicology, or forensic anthropology. Specializing in a specific area will enhance your expertise and job prospects. Stay updated on advancements and trends in forensic science through professional journals, conferences, and online resources. Network with professionals in the field by attending industry events, joining professional associations, and connecting with experts in forensic science. Stay committed to lifelong learning and professional development to enhance your skills and advance your career in forensic science. Consider pursuing advanced certifications, attending specialized training programs, or pursuing higher education opportunities as you progress in your career.
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Maxim

Maxim Emmanuel  |203 Answers  |Ask -

Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 30, 2024Hindi
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Maxim

Maxim Emmanuel  |203 Answers  |Ask -

Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

Maxim

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Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 24, 2024Hindi
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Career
Hello, I'm 18F just gave my board exams and is interested in international relations, international studies, cultural studies Which universities are offering these undergraduate /graduate courses in India?
Ans: Thank you for your queries...the 18F sounded like an algorithm..!

Sure you must have developed an interest in International relations, studies .Now you must develop research skills to find study opportunities.
The international environment is all about doing one's task,which is contrary to the spoon feed environment in and around here!

India is a subcontinent offering education opportunities across the Union of States, which I have no idea where you hail from.

However here are a few ...spoon feed!
Ha Ha!

Jawaharlal Nehru University
Jawaharlal Nehru University (JNU) is a public or government research university located in New Delhi, India. It was established in 1969 and named after ...Jawaharlal Nehru !

New Delhi: The School of International Studies at JNU offers a two year course in MA Politics (International Studies.

Centre for International Relations, Islamic University of Science and Technology, Jammu and Kashmir. Jadavpur University · Jawaharlal Nehru University, School .

jawaharlal nehru university

Jamia Millia Islamia

University of Mumbai

Central University of Kerala

Noida International University

Christ University

Galgotias University

Jadavpur University

Jindal School of International Affairs

South Asian University

Symbiosis International University

Adamas University

Pondicherry University

Ashoka University

Chanakya University

Gujarat University

IILM University

Central University of Jharkhand

Delhi University

Faculty of Law, Integral University

Manipal Academy of Higher Education

RV University

SHARDA UNIVERSITY

Ajeenkya DY Patil University

This is just a synopsis, as there are many more,its not a recommendation , kindly do your research and select what's best and suits your budget!
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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |179 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 30, 2024Hindi
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Hi..I am a 45 years widow lady and having a son. I am widowed since ten years. One person age of around 50 years is asking about love and may be marriage who is a divorcee and having no kids. Problem is that I am good looking and he is just an average looking person but his nature is good and he continuously asking me for my companionship. I am in a very much confusing state of mind. I love his talks, his concerned towards me except his looks. Kindly tell me what should I do. I know everything that he may be good for me but my mind is not allowing me. does the looks of a person matters if I choose him? kindly clear my confusion.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry for your loss. It is certainly not easy to put yourself out there and find love. And it might seem that you should have to settle because it's difficult to find a kind man, but you shouldn't. While I would like to point out that looks don't last forever; it's people's nature, their kindness, and their behavior that stays in the long run, that doesn't mean you must settle down with the first man who ticks the boxes. If your heart isn't into it, you should not have to rush. Give it some time. If you are okay with it, maintain a friendly relationship with him. If, with time, you grow to like him, then that's amazing. If you don't, that's perfectly fine too.
My only suggestion here is don't rush. A good nature, though hard to find, is still the bare minimum. Also, please don't focus on outward appearances only. They can be deceiving.

Best Wishes.
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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |175 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 27, 2024Hindi
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I am married since 2015 and I live in a joint family comprising of more than 20 members .everything was good until member of the families started accusing me of everything bad happening to family .father in law started abusing me ,when husband came in support of me even he was abused and man handled by everyone in the family .we live now in different town 400 away from them ,due to husband job, every now and the we both are made accused of something bad happening in family which the family member of mother in law side are instigating ..like sister in law caught in a relationship she named me for that blaming that i was the one who led the boy to meet and other started saying so to in laws and then same abusing over phone started...husband is supportive and is ready to leave everything for our mental peace but is emotionally down as he has to leave his family ...i am feeling very disturbed now of all this and the situation some how affecting my 5 years old son who always asks for the reasons for crying .
Ans: it's important to prioritize the safety and well-being of yourself and your family. No one should have to endure abuse or false accusations, especially within their own family. It's commendable that your husband is supportive and willing to prioritize your mental peace, even if it means leaving behind his family.

In such toxic and volatile situations, it may be necessary to distance yourselves from the negative influences and create boundaries to protect your mental and emotional health. Moving away from the family home was a positive step, and it's important to continue prioritizing your own well-being and that of your son.

Communication between you and your husband is key during this time. Lean on each other for support, and continue to have open and honest conversations about your feelings, concerns, and plans for the future. Together, you can navigate through this challenging time and make decisions that are in the best interest of your family's happiness and safety.

It's also important to seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a therapist who can offer guidance, empathy, and perspective during this difficult time. You don't have to face these challenges alone, and reaching out for support can provide valuable emotional support and validation.

Lastly, remember to prioritize self-care for yourself and your son. Take time to engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, and ensure that your son feels loved and supported during this transition. Children can be sensitive to family dynamics, so providing a stable and nurturing environment is crucial for his emotional well-being.

Overall, it's important to remember that you deserve to be in a safe and supportive environment, free from abuse and false accusations. It may be a difficult journey, but by prioritizing your own well-being and making decisions that are in the best interest of your family, you can navigate through this challenging time and emerge stronger and happier in the end.
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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |175 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

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Relationship
My parents said to me for marriage but i am in relationship with someone but he doesn't want marriage with me what i can do. I feel depressed and no one understands my feelings because it's very hard move on in life
Ans: it's important to acknowledge and validate your feelings. It's natural to feel upset, disappointed, and even depressed when facing such circumstances. Allow yourself to feel those emotions and give yourself permission to grieve the loss of the future you envisioned with your partner.

However, it's also important to recognize that you deserve to be in a relationship where your needs and desires are valued and respected. If marriage is important to you and your partner is unwilling to commit to that, it may be a sign of fundamental differences in your priorities and goals. In such cases, it's essential to have open and honest communication with your partner about your feelings and needs.

Express to your partner why marriage is important to you and listen to their perspective as well. However, if you find that you're unable to reach a compromise or if your partner remains unwilling to reconsider their stance, you may need to reassess the relationship and consider whether it's ultimately fulfilling and healthy for you.

Moving on from a relationship can indeed be incredibly challenging, but it's important to prioritize your own happiness and well-being. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family members who can offer understanding and empathy during this difficult time. Consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor who can provide guidance and help you navigate through your emotions.

Remember that while it may feel overwhelming now, with time and self-care, you will be able to heal and move forward toward a brighter future. You deserve to be in a relationship where you feel valued, respected, and fulfilled, and it's okay to take steps to pursue that happiness, even if it means letting go of something that's no longer serving you.
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