My Boyfriend is not really the Controlling type. But, sometimes, he disapproves of some things which I do. In such cases, he communicates his Disapproval indirectly saying "I don't like you Dressing up like this Boldly. But still, if that's what you want, you may go ahead & Dress up as you'd like to, I have no Right to prevent you from doing so, but I will be Disappointed if you do." or "I don't want you to go out or hang out with these particular people (some of my close Male Friends). You have all the Freedom to interact with whoever you want to, but I will be Hurt, if you are too Close to your other Male Friends." Most of the time, I compromised & avoided Dressing up too Boldly, avoided Partying/Travelling with some of my Close Male Friends & avoided some other things which he wouldn't approve of, just for the sake of maintaining our Relationship. But recently, I tried to Test, how he'd react, if I deliberately do something which he doesn't like. So, on New Year's Day, I dressed up in revealing Clothes that he would never approve of & Partied wildly, all Night & even got Drunk with some of my Close Male Friends, with whom, he wants me to maintain Distance. He stubbornly refused to come for Partying with me, because I Dressed up too Boldly & refused to change them, even after he expected me to do so. He didn't even want me Drinking/Partying with some of my Close Male Friends. But I Respected the Boundaries of our Relationship & throughout the Night, I kept my Boyfriend informed about my Whereabouts, so that he's Reassured that I am not Cheating on him. But ever since then, he's been Treating me rather Coldly. He's being Indifferent to me, without Questioning me much, the way he always used to. He's just maintaining normal Communication without being Flirtatious, as he used to. And the Sex has also become quite Mechanical without much Romance, unlike how Passionate he used to be, earlier. I've tried talking to him, but he just keeps lying that he isn't Upset with me. Now I am Feeling really Guilty for whatever I had done on New Year's Day, even though, I don't think I did anything Wrong. Was it really Wrong on my Part, to do something which I always liked to, but my Boyfriend didn't want me to? Or is my Boyfriend Wrong, here? What do I do now? Please advise me.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Obviously you come from a family where the value systems on what their children should and should not wear are clear. What's the point fighting that? The more you rebel, the more they are going to think that things are getting out of hands where it concerns you. They might blame your friends, the movies that you watch, the food that you eat as reasons for why you are the way that you are or how you might become...

What you can try is get a few of your friends home; your mother maybe able to see and understand that what youngsters wear these days does not define who they are or become later in life. Certainly no point talking but if she maybe able to see for herself, she may loosen the grip a bit on what you wear...it's worth the effort!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Nightmares can be a result of worries, anxieties, fears or insecurities...
It maybe worth your time to consult someone who can teach you to relax through Meditation and other methods and it's possible that you might be able to get to the source of what causes you to wake up with these nightmares.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: I assume you an IT Professional encourage you to pick up new skills that your company is going on for. At 48 that may be an easier option rather getting into a business. Best to protect your savings until you think you are fully ready to take business risk.

Ans: I appreciate your concern for your son's future. However, I would let your son take the call by making a short list of institutions, going over their placement track record.

Support the decision that he takes and bless him.

Ans: Congrats on qualifying as a Mech engr, the most foundational Engg discipline.

Use your interview experience to learn about what went well. Build on it. And what didn't and make up those shortcomings.

Looks like you opted and applied for programming jobs without much exposure. If that assumption is correct, don't go that route. Instead look forward pur mech Engg jobs. Pick programming skills in the coming years and then make a move.

Go in for something that gives you experience and build your confidence.

All the best.

Ans: Dear Murari,
I don't understand how your parents can sign the papers by which you are separated from your wife.
One thing is clear, you seem to take no effort in making major decisions of your life. Marriage, work...this concerns you and you need to STEP UP and take decisions; whether the decisions are favorable or not is something you will learn over a period of time.
As of now, focus on getting a steady job and then you decide when and if you wish to get married. If you continue to act emotionally unsure, someone else will step in and make all decisions for you...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Consider yourself lucky that you have two jobs. Check your interest, prospects in the two jobs and decide and go for it with full commitment and interest.

If your worry is that the better paying job is in an entirely new area, treat it as an opportunity to prove yourself to pick another area, shed your worried and grow in your career. All the best,!

Ans: Hello, You will need to go over the terms of your appointments. Many company don't encourage employees serving notice period to continue until the full notice period.

Best is to use this time to drop many things that you have been wanting to do but didn't have the time-- use this time to travel, engage in your favourite hobby, take up a skill upgrade course or just chill.

If you are a super workaholic do ask your new employer if you can start early.

Ans: Thank you for sharing the details clearly. Let me break this down calmly and practically.

Where you stand today
Age: 48
Investment start: 2017
Current portfolio value: approx ?82 lakh
Monthly SIP: ?50,000
Time to goal: 10 years
Target corpus: ?2.5 crore at age 58

First, the good news. With an ?82 lakh base already built, you are not starting late. You are already past the hardest part, which is accumulation.

Is the goal achievable?
Yes, it is achievable with discipline and some fine tuning.

If your existing ?82 lakh grows at a modest 11 percent for 10 years, it alone can become roughly ?2.3 crore.
Your ongoing SIP of ?50,000 per month, even at 10 to 11 percent, can add another ?1 crore plus over 10 years.

So mathematically, you are on track. The key question is risk balance and fund structure, not return chasing.

Review of your current SIP portfolio
Right now, your SIPs have:
• Heavy exposure to small cap funds
• Multiple funds from the same AMC
• One sector fund
• Very little clarity on core stability

Small caps give good returns, but at your age and goal timeline, too much concentration can increase volatility when you least want it.

What needs correction
Reduce small cap overload
You have three small cap funds plus one focused fund. That is aggressive. Keep one strong small cap fund, not three.

Avoid duplication
Multiple funds from the same AMC don’t add diversification. They increase overlap.

Sector fund allocation
Pharma fund is fine, but limit it to a smaller portion. Sector funds should never drive the portfolio.

Add a clear core
Large cap or flexi cap should be the backbone now. Stability matters more than excitement.

Suggested SIP structure (illustrative)
Out of ?50,000 monthly SIP:

• Large cap or Flexi cap: ?15,000
• Hybrid or Dynamic asset allocation: ?10,000
• Mid cap: ?10,000
• Small cap: ?10,000
• Sector or thematic (optional): ?5,000

This gives growth without sleepless nights.

Important next steps
• Gradually rebalance existing investments, do not exit everything at once
• Shift from Regular plans to Direct plans if possible (this alone improves returns)
• Review asset allocation every year, not returns
• From age 55 onward, slowly start moving part of equity gains to safer instruments

Final thought
Your goal of ?2.5 crore is realistic. You don’t need aggressive bets anymore. You need consistency, structure, and risk control.

If you want, I can:
• Rebuild this exact portfolio fund by fund
• Estimate year wise corpus growth
• Suggest a pre retirement safety strategy from age 55

Just tell me how deep you want to go.


Thank you for sharing your details so openly. Let me talk to you like I would to a friend, not in numbers first, but in reality.

You are 48, you started investing back in 2017, and today you’ve already built around ?82 lakh. That itself tells me one thing. You are disciplined and you stayed invested. That matters more than anything else.

Now about your goal of ?2.5 crore by 58. Honestly, this is not an unrealistic dream. In fact, you are closer than you think. With ten years still in hand and a steady ?50,000 SIP running, the foundation is already strong.

Looking at your SIP list, you’ve clearly leaned towards growth funds, especially small caps. That’s fine, and it probably helped you build this corpus so far. But as you move closer to your goal, the game slowly changes. It’s less about chasing the highest return and more about protecting what you’ve already built.

Right now, there’s a bit too much exposure to small caps and some overlap between funds. When markets do well, this feels great. But when they correct, the same portfolio can test your patience and peace of mind.

You don’t need to overhaul everything. Small adjustments are enough. Think of large cap or flexi cap funds as the steady engine of your portfolio. Mid caps and small caps should add growth, not dominate it. Sector funds like pharma are okay in small doses, but they shouldn’t drive your future.

If you balance things a little better, your existing ?82 lakh has a very good chance of compounding close to your target on its own. Your SIPs then become the safety margin, not the lifeline.

The most important part comes after 55. That’s when you slowly start moving some money to safer avenues so that a market fall doesn’t hit you right before retirement.