Ans: Dear AM,
Oh my dear, why are you being so unkind to yourself? It takes two to tango!
Maybe, you realize that you have been taking him for granted, but hey, there’s an expiry date to punishing yourself over it.
Once you know, it’s time to work on your relationship and that certainly doesn’t mean being harsh.
This could also lead you to feel victimised and not be a very favourable mindset. Instead, what if you get to the root of the challenge at hand?
Here’s a few reality check questions. It might give you a chance to go back to the drawing board and reevaluate your relationship with a fresh pair of eyes.
What is causing me to have that temper?
What usually triggers the arguments?
What did I see in my partner when I chose him to be my significant half?
Do I still see the same in him even now or has it changed? If yes, what has changed? Am I willing to adapt to the change?
What causes me to be afraid of him moving on? Am I in a co-dependent relationship?
What will happen to me if he moves on?
Why is important for me to put so much energy into changing myself? Is it for myself or to keep him from moving on?
You get the drift?
You can add to these questions and give your mind an alternate way of processing things into a solution space.
Having said this; it’s time to give yourself some love too, no matter what, prioritize yourself and create some mind space to reevaluate where you are to where you want to be.
Happy 2022 and best wishes!
