Hi Anu, I went ahead and spoke to my wife at their home for 2 hours personally and also took her out for lunch next day. Can you suggest me a good relationship Expert and Mind coach in Hyderabad? I insist only physical consultation this month last week and also next month first week, should be able to spend good time on our case, Not to be in hurry, to go to next case. (I think that would be good enough), I know it may take some sessions to bring it to a fruitful result. Please advice...

Hi Dr. Ashish, Good Afternoon, Iam 45 years old. I got married in 2010. My wife has ego and doesnt get adjusted to me and my family. I occured the experience after 2012 when my wife was 2 month pregnant. I was going to job, there was no peace of mind at all. From 2013 february we are not staying together. Her life is running as per her mother advice. We are having a communication very rarely. I had heard from her mother in law like impotent, not capable of doing anything. There are de-grading words always used and treated with no respect whenever i visited my wife house. My wife has communicated me verbally on January 2023, that she doesn't want the relationship to continue. She blocked me on whatsapp dated 03rd February 2023. I have one daughter aged 9 years. I am calling every week to get in touch with my daughter. The wife family not responding to the phones and my wife also. Request your sincere advice for permanent solution. Thanks & Regards, Deepak Shetty

I am a married man from last 20 years. I am unable to understand the psychology of my wife. she always complains me that she doesn't feel any belongingness from my end and keep her on last priority. further, I always take care of my mother, sisters and friends. I always talk to her in a very rude and loud voice. whenever i approach her she starts blaming me and after sometime, I became irritated by her repetitive statements. whenever she approach me to patch up after few moments she said that I am talking loud and non sense. please guide me how to tackle this problem to rejuvenate the relation?

Dear Thanks for your quick response to my earlier query, during the last 2 months I have tried to follow your advice & have also started support from our office counsellor, I am writing to you again as some aspects I felt ashamed to discuss with the office counsellor & some to have a 2nd opinion. I had deeply thought about my expectations from my marriage & wife. In the last 6 months as I am staying separate in Bangalore, I have found much better & am much more communicative with my wife, discussing & sharing emotionally. When we stay together the continuous expectation would put both of us in a panic & irritation ultimately resulting in fights & also finally not sharing & the bad luck of seeing her face will add oil to the fire, with many of my outbursts not being very parliamentary. So I see our relationship is better if it is long-distance. I discussed this with my wife & she also agrees somewhat, but the basis of husband-wife relationship is to stay together, where we fail. Since we stayed together for 17 yrs we know each other’s problems & historical facts which no one else knows, so frankly I need a long-distance person with whom I can share emotionally, but for my wife she requires someone who is also close to her physically. One idea that I got is to let things be as it is i.e. let her stay in Pune while I stay in Bangalore & she be in a relationship with Sumit & maybe stay with him without legally separating, maybe when my daughter is having holidays, we can have short trips. This will keep the social well-being intact as people will not know as we don’t have any close relatives in Pune. But I am worried about the long-term impact will our marriage last especially what plans should I make in old age. Want your opinion & what precautions do I need to take. In the last 2 mnths, I have been to Pune 3 times for the reason of my daughters JEE for which I help her. I talked with my wife about Sumit in early Jan & she said they are good friends & they share a lot of intimate talks; she was not ready to tell me anything more than that. On asking about physical relationships she was elusive . But she said she doesn’t want to legally separate from me. I also discussed if she wants, we can have a long-distance relationship supporting each other (without naming Sumit) she did not respond. Though Sumit talks to me once in 7-10 days we never talked about his relationship with my wife, we talk about status of his divorce, old office stuffs etc. 2 weeks ago my wife told me that Sumit's parents, divorced sister who had come for a visit to Pune will be coming to our house to meet her. Later she posted some photos in her WhatsApp status for everyone it will look as if some friend had to come to visit her (everyone will think some lady friend). In mid-January in one of my old office colleagues (who is a friend with Sumit) Facebook I saw that in his son's birthday my wife is there (he doesn’t know or have seen my wife), I tactically asked him who that lady was, he said it is Sumit’s friend. Can you please help me if she is going in the same way I am thinking about the future of our relationship. The last point is something which I could not ask anyone. During my last 3 visits to Pune I had sex with my wife. I will like to tell that my wife is always (since our marriage) very passive in sex she has to be told what to do 1 by 1, (though for me it gave me some amount of pleasure command) which she will do properly & maybe sometimes do 1-2 things on her own or ask me to do. She was same this time also. I never had sex relationship with anyone else so this acts maybe in a distance timeframe gives me a lot of pleasure. I am worried what will be this relationship be if she starts staying with Sumit, what is your advice? My counsellor advised me to sit & talk with Sumit & my wife together but really, I am not seeing any reason to do it, do I need to do this joint meeting & if so, what do I need to discuss

Maam - I am recently facing trouble in my 22 year old marriage. I am unable to understand my wife's behaviour which according to her is very normal. I am unable to judge when she requires me. I have not been a caring husband and can be attributed to this behaviour of mine. She had got very along very well with our son all these while and now that he is in college and travels his behaviour also irritates her. She says that he has also changed a lot and have no respect for females, he has lots of secret which he is avoiding tell us. She is very much worried about it and I feel that has spilled over into our relation as well. We compromise for a few days which is mostly from my side but again on the 4th day it is back to the same.. Can you suggest some actions from my side which can help improve my relation with my wife and understand her better..