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Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 18, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 07, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I am a married man from last 20 years. I am unable to understand the psychology of my wife. she always complains me that she doesn't feel any belongingness from my end and keep her on last priority. further, I always take care of my mother, sisters and friends. I always talk to her in a very rude and loud voice. whenever i approach her she starts blaming me and after sometime, I became irritated by her repetitive statements. whenever she approach me to patch up after few moments she said that I am talking loud and non sense. please guide me how to tackle this problem to rejuvenate the relation?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You yourself have identified that you talk rudely to your wife; so how do you expect her to relate to you.
If you have chosen to 'rejuvenate' the relation, then the way the two of you communicate with each other must be changed.
This is a suggestion for both of you to improve your communication:
1. Listen to the other patiently when they are talking
2. Ask: 'What can I do to make you feel better?'
3. Make sure that there are no accusations/complaints made during the communication
4. Practice compassion when the other person is talking
5. Don't interrupt them in between when they are talking

This is just the beginning and basic guidelines to begin communicating better. As the two of you see the benefits, you can then start to work on the challenges that you face from family. As much as you take care of your side of the family, make sure that you give enough attention to your wife as well and the same goes for her.
The two of you are simply crying out for each other's time and attention. Start with the basic suggestions and slowly take it on from there.

All the best!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 04, 2022

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Relationship
Hi Anu, how are you? I don’t have a good married life. My wife and I always think differently. She hates me and living with me. We don't have a good intimate relationship. A few years back, she wanted divorce me but stopped due to children and family pressure. She also tried to stay with another person in the past. She is not satisfied with me. We’ve completed 13 years and, since the last seven years, life is bad with her. She is staying with me and the children but not with a happy mind. She is a good devotee but she is not happy. She thinks I spoiled her life. Need your kind advice. S
Ans:

Dear S,

She is a good devotee? I can’t quite understand this statement. And she hates you? How?

If what you have mentioned are facts, then isn’t it time for the two of you to evaluate if it’s worth living together?

If you are continuing with the marriage for the sake of the children, then do understand that there are certain ways in which you should behave so that the children do not absorb the stress that the two of you are facing.

If you keep arguing or fighting in front of them, it will affect them emotionally.

It is time that the two of you have a conversation as mature adults and sort this out quickly before it consumes the children. Else, make the sane decision of going your separate ways.

If you can’t do this by yourselves, seek professional help as soon as possible.

Do remember, it takes two people to make a marriage work, so look within yourself as well to see what you can change to smooth things over and work on that.

All the best and a Happy 2022.

 

..Read more

Love Guru

Love Guru   |187 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Mar 13, 2023

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Relationship
I am 45 and my wife 40. We are married since 10 years and have a child. We are middle class. I really care my wife and love her. I believe in women empowerment and want my wife to be good in computer knowledge, spoken english and be a smart lady . Smart not in terms of look but from mind. I am an event manager. I want my wife to take take care of house hold responsibilities and help me at work to certain extent in balanced manner. But she is unable to take care of any of my wishes, desires, ambitions. I have tried to talk several several time but every time it becomes one sided. If i speak 100 then she doesn't speak even 1. I want to keep her happy. I want to give her an identity. But i fail in all because she doesn't understand me. This nature of her is just crushing all my ambitions, desires and wishes. By nature she seems to be very simple but as we know too much of anything is bad. Several times i have told her to talk and let me know her point of view, but she doesn't. She is not mature enough to handle those responsibilities that come in our life at different times. FEEL JUST HELPLESS HOW TO TUNE MY HOUSE AND HOUSE HOLD AFFAIRS WITHOUT THE SUPPORT OF WIFE. PLEASE GUIDE.
Ans: You have made very clear what you want, but we have no clue what your wife wants. And communication — or rather the lack of it — is the problem. You obviously can’t facilitate it because she’s simply not responding and I find that highly unusual. It seems like she is unable to express herself at all, and that is certainly an issue. Please consult a professional therapist and explain yourself; I would suggest you attend the first session alone so you are able to articulate the exact nature of the problem.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 17, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 11, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Anu, I am working in a central psu and my wife works for state govt and both are 48 yrs. We are married for 20 yrs and have 2 sons (20 &16). She is never expressive nor vocal, because of this our marital relationship have not seen even a single day of happiness. Her parents never ever made her realised that problem can be from her side too nor asked me even a single time whats is bothering me. She is over ambitious in her job and neglects everything in the personal life. This negligence started from the day 1 of the married life. She never try to understand the problem and reasons behind and just ignore and move ahead. This makes life miserable and likewise 20 yrs passed.. Its like when sons are moving out of home, I feel very much alone and sometimes feels to runaway from life...She dont show any emotions, giving the reasons that its her nature...She says loves me, but whats that love which is not felt by me for a single day...I wanted a wife not a nurse.. What to do....I lost my hope of life.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am sure there is an issue that you are facing BUT to generalize it as: because of this our marital relationship have not seen even a single day of happiness.
Are you sure that has not been a single day or a single moment of feeling some joy? DO NOT indulge in this kind of belief as it only makes the issue look bigger than what it maybe.
If you feel alone, talk to her and tell her exactly how you feel. It's your marriage as well; do something to stay in it.
If there is a reason for her to be the way that she is, that needs to be addressed. Also, by complaining rather than facing the issue together, you are alienating yourself from the marriage. Give this a fair chance and deal with it in a mature way. Talking about it helps more than complaining; as she will bring her list of complaints and then it just gets into a loop.
- have an honest conversation
- make space for a back and forth conversation
If she refuses to talk, then possibly there is a need for a professional to intervene. She will also need to understand what hurts you and work on it, so that the marriage moves on smoothly. Marriage is a two-way dance.

All the best!

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

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Money
Myself and my spouse are working and have 2 kids -9 & 10 years. We are in our early 40 and acquired corpus of 3 cr. Corpus 2.3 crore is in EPF , PPF , Sukanya for both children and rest in NPS (75 % equity) and mutual fund. We have recently increased Mutual fund investment after our home loan finished and doing SIP in large and mid cap index funds for 450000 pm. As we have more in debt investment due to EPF and PPF investment, is it wise to increase MF at this age. We are investing 6 laks PA in PPf and Sukanya account and are confused whether to reduce this amount and contribute more to MF. We have saving capacity of 15 lakhs per annum after our mandatory 12 % EPF contribution.
Ans: You've done an excellent job of building a substantial corpus for your family's future, and your commitment to both debt and equity investments is commendable. Let's delve into whether it's wise to increase your mutual fund (MF) investments at this stage and whether to adjust your contributions to PPF and Sukanya accounts:

Assess Your Financial Goals: Consider your financial goals, time horizon, and risk tolerance when deciding on the allocation between debt and equity investments. While debt instruments like EPF, PPF, and Sukanya Samriddhi Yojana offer stability and tax benefits, equity investments through MFs provide growth potential over the long term.
Diversification is Key: It's important to maintain a diversified investment portfolio that balances risk and return. Given your substantial debt investments in EPF, PPF, and Sukanya accounts, increasing your exposure to equity through MFs can help diversify your portfolio and potentially enhance returns, especially considering your long investment horizon.
Evaluate Investment Horizon: At your age, you still have a significant investment horizon ahead of you, which allows you to benefit from the power of compounding and weather market fluctuations. Since equity investments tend to perform well over the long term, increasing your MF contributions can be a prudent strategy to capitalize on growth opportunities.
Review Your Financial Position: Assess your current financial position, including your income, expenses, and savings capacity, to determine if you have the flexibility to allocate more funds towards MF investments. Given your saving capacity of 15 lakhs per annum after EPF contributions, you may consider redirecting a portion of these savings towards MFs to achieve a balanced portfolio.
Consult a Financial Advisor: Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to evaluate your investment strategy holistically. A financial advisor can help assess your risk profile, recommend suitable asset allocation, and tailor an investment plan aligned with your financial goals and aspirations.
Regularly Monitor and Adjust: Continuously monitor your investment portfolio and make adjustments as needed based on changes in your financial situation, market conditions, and investment objectives. Stay informed about investment opportunities and make informed decisions to optimize your portfolio's performance over time.
Ultimately, the decision to increase MF investments and adjust contributions to PPF and Sukanya accounts depends on your individual circumstances, goals, and risk appetite. By carefully evaluating these factors and seeking professional advice, you can make informed decisions to build a robust and diversified investment portfolio that serves your family's long-term financial well-being.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 18, 2024Hindi
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Money
I am 52,going to retire this year with a 2.5 cr corpus without any pension. Please advise me a good retirement plan for regular income. I am a moderate risk taker. Presently my monthly expenses are 70 k.
Ans: Given your impending retirement and moderate risk tolerance, it's crucial to create a retirement plan that provides a regular income stream while preserving your capital. Here's a suggested retirement plan tailored to your needs:

Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP): Set up a Systematic Withdrawal Plan from your remaining corpus to supplement your annuity income. Determine a withdrawal rate that meets your monthly expenses while ensuring your savings last throughout retirement. Opt for a conservative withdrawal rate to safeguard against market volatility.
Income-Oriented Mutual Funds: Allocate a portion of your corpus to income-oriented mutual funds or dividend-paying stocks. These investments can provide regular dividends or interest income, further augmenting your retirement income stream. Focus on funds with a track record of consistent payouts and stable returns.
Fixed Deposits and Bonds: Consider allocating a portion of your corpus to fixed deposits or bonds for stability and income generation. Choose investment-grade bonds or government securities to minimize credit risk. Opt for shorter maturity periods to maintain liquidity and flexibility.
Emergency Fund: Set aside a portion of your corpus as an emergency fund to cover unforeseen expenses or emergencies. Aim to maintain at least six to twelve months' worth of living expenses in a liquid and easily accessible account.
Regular Portfolio Reviews: Regularly review your retirement portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to periodically assess your retirement plan and make adjustments as needed.
Health Insurance: Invest in comprehensive health insurance coverage to protect against medical expenses during retirement. As healthcare costs tend to rise with age, having adequate insurance coverage is essential to safeguard your retirement savings.
By implementing this retirement plan, you can enjoy a steady income stream while preserving your capital for the long term. Remember to prioritize financial security and peace of mind as you transition into retirement. Congratulations on reaching this milestone, and best wishes for a fulfilling retirement journey ahead!

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

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Money
Sir, Now I am 55 and started investing since last two years ago, due to family responsibilities. Now I am investing in (1) HDFC Midcap opportunities fund direct plan Rs 5000 (2) Mirae asset large cap and mid cap fund direct growth plan Rs 5000 (3) Nippon India Small Cap fund direct growth plan Rs 8000 (4) Parag Parikh flexicap fund RS 2000 per month. I will be remain invested for min 10 years. And retired with normal corpus. Not big. Please suggest for investment, Within Rs 20000- per month.
Ans: It's never too late to start investing, and it's admirable that you've taken this step towards securing your financial future, especially with family responsibilities and approaching retirement. Let's explore some suggestions for your investment within your budget of Rs 20,000 per month:

Diversify Your Portfolio: Your current portfolio already includes a mix of mid-cap, large-cap, small-cap, and flexi-cap funds, which is a good start. To further diversify, consider adding a balanced fund or a hybrid fund, which invests in a mix of equities and debt instruments. This can provide stability while still offering growth potential.
Consider Debt Investments: As you approach retirement, it's essential to balance your portfolio with debt investments to reduce overall risk. You can allocate a portion of your monthly investment towards debt funds or fixed-income instruments like PPF, RDs, or bonds. These investments offer steady returns and help preserve capital.
Evaluate Risk Tolerance: Given your age and investment horizon of at least 10 years, you can afford to take on some risk to achieve higher returns. However, it's crucial to assess your risk tolerance and ensure that your investment choices align with your comfort level.
Review and Rebalance Regularly: Periodically review your investment portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals, risk tolerance, and market conditions. Rebalance your portfolio if necessary, considering changes in your financial situation or investment objectives.
Consult with a Financial Advisor: Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner or financial advisor who can provide personalized advice based on your specific needs and goals. They can help you create a customized investment plan and provide guidance on asset allocation, portfolio diversification, and risk management.
Stay Invested for the Long Term: Investing for retirement requires patience and discipline. Continue to invest regularly and stay committed to your long-term financial goals. Avoid making impulsive decisions based on short-term market fluctuations.
Remember, investing is a journey, and it's essential to remain focused on your goals while adapting to changing circumstances. With careful planning and prudent investment choices, you can build a secure financial future for yourself and your family. Keep up the good work, and best of luck on your investment journey!

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 18, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello I am 25 years and earning around 17k per month and I have sip of Axis small cap of rs 500 Nippon India small cap 1000 ICICI prudential technology 500 and PPF 500 till now I have around 1.2 lakhs in mutual fund and equity 70k please suggest me for long term wealth
Ans: It's great to see your proactive approach to investing at such a young age! Let's explore some suggestions for long-term wealth creation:

Continue SIPs: Your SIPs in Axis Small Cap, Nippon India Small Cap, and ICICI Prudential Technology are a good start. These funds offer exposure to different sectors, providing diversification and growth potential. Consider gradually increasing your SIP amounts as your income grows.
Explore Diversification: While small-cap and technology funds offer growth potential, consider diversifying your portfolio further. Look into investing in large-cap or multi-cap funds to balance risk and potential returns. A mix of different asset classes can enhance the stability and growth of your portfolio.
Utilize PPF: PPF is an excellent tool for long-term wealth accumulation, offering tax benefits and guaranteed returns. Continue contributing to your PPF account regularly to take advantage of its compounding effect over time. Aim to maximize your annual contributions within the prescribed limits.
Stay Invested for the Long Term: Investing is a long-term commitment, and patience is key to achieving wealth accumulation goals. Avoid frequent trading or reacting to short-term market fluctuations. Stay focused on your financial objectives and stick to your investment plan.
Educate Yourself: Take the time to learn about different investment options, risk management strategies, and personal finance concepts. Attend workshops, read books, or follow reputable financial blogs to enhance your knowledge and make informed decisions.
Emergency Fund: Building an emergency fund is crucial to protect yourself from unexpected expenses or income disruptions. Aim to set aside at least 3-6 months' worth of living expenses in a liquid and accessible account.
Review and Rebalance: Regularly review your investment portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Rebalance your portfolio if needed, considering changes in market conditions or your personal circumstances.
Remember, investing for long-term wealth requires discipline, patience, and a well-thought-out strategy. Consult with a Certified Financial Planner to create a customized plan tailored to your goals and financial situation. Keep up the good work, and stay committed to your journey towards financial success!

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

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Money
Hi sir I'm doing SIP in 1.) uti nifty fifty direct - 2k ..2.) axis small cap direct- 2k...3.) canara robeco blue chip - 2k....4.) quantity mid cap direct - 3k...5.) navi Nasdaq 100 - 1k... Need to change or alter if any ?
Ans: Your current SIP portfolio consists of a diverse mix of funds covering various market segments, which is a good strategy for long-term growth.

it's essential to periodically review your investments to ensure they align with your financial goals, risk tolerance, and market conditions.

Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner or a professional Mutual Fund Distributor to get personalized advice tailored to your needs and objectives.

With careful monitoring and adjustments as needed, you're on track to build a robust investment portfolio for long-term wealth creation.

Investing through Regular Plans via a Certified Financial Planner's guidance offers several benefits for your financial journey.

Your commitment to SIPs is commendable, showcasing a disciplined approach towards wealth creation for the future.

Regular Plans through a professional Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) provide personalized guidance and advice tailored to your needs.

MFDs have extensive experience and expertise in navigating the complexities of mutual fund investing, ensuring sound decisions.

They offer valuable insights into fund selection, considering factors like performance, risk, and suitability for your goals.

Moreover, MFDs provide ongoing support and assistance, helping you stay informed and make necessary adjustments to your portfolio.

Investing in Regular Plans through MFDs ensures access to a broader range of funds and investment options.

This diversification can help spread risk and optimize returns over the long term, enhancing the stability of your portfolio.

Additionally, MFDs assist in managing paperwork and administrative tasks associated with investing, making the process smoother for you.

Their guidance empowers you to make informed decisions aligned with your financial objectives and risk tolerance.

Remember, investing is a journey, and having a Certified Financial Planner by your side can make a significant difference.

They offer valuable advice, support, and encouragement, helping you navigate market fluctuations and stay focused on your goals.

With diligence and guidance, you're on track to achieve financial success and build a secure future for yourself and your loved ones.

Keep up the good work, and trust in the expertise of your Certified Financial Planner to guide you towards your goals.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 19, 2024Hindi
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Parag Parikh Flexi cap Fund
Ans: Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund is a well-regarded fund in the mutual fund industry. It's known for its unique approach to investing across various market segments.

The fund follows a flexible investment strategy, allowing it to invest in stocks across market capitalizations, including large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap companies.

One of the standout features of Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund is its global diversification approach. The fund has the flexibility to invest a portion of its corpus in international equities, providing investors exposure to global markets and opportunities.

Additionally, the fund's focus on quality companies with sustainable business models and strong management teams is commendable. This approach aims to mitigate downside risk and generate consistent returns over the long term.

Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund has a track record of delivering competitive returns compared to its peers and benchmark indices. However, investors should note that past performance is not indicative of future results.

As with any investment, it's essential to assess your risk tolerance, investment objectives, and time horizon before investing in Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund or any mutual fund.

Consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized advice and guidance tailored to your financial situation and goals.

Overall, Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund is a reputable option for investors seeking diversification, global exposure, and potential long-term growth in their investment portfolio.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

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I have been investing in mutual funds like Nippon large cap 8k , HDFC Mid cap opportunities 3k, Quant small cap 3k , Nippon India small cap 2k, Parag Parikh flexi cap 4k, Aditya Birla sun life PSU 2k, HDFC Balanced Advantage fund 2k , Nippon India credit risk (Debt Fund) 2k . Need some suggestions on the overall portfolio and if any further improvements can be done on debt Fund .
Ans: Your investment portfolio reflects a well-diversified approach across various segments of the market, which is commendable. Let's delve into some suggestions for optimizing your portfolio and enhancing the debt component.

Your allocation across large-cap, mid-cap, small-cap, flexi-cap, and sector-specific funds provides a good balance of growth potential and stability.

Consider evaluating the performance and consistency of each fund to ensure they align with your investment objectives and risk tolerance.

As for your debt fund, given the current economic environment, it's prudent to review your exposure to credit risk.

Consider diversifying your debt allocation by exploring options such as liquid funds or short-term debt funds, which offer lower credit risk and higher liquidity.

Additionally, assessing the expense ratio and credit quality of your current debt fund can help determine its suitability for your portfolio.

Pls consult a Certified Financial Planner to assist you in fine-tuning your portfolio to better align with your goals.

Regularly reviewing and rebalancing your portfolio ensures it remains optimized to weather market fluctuations and achieve long-term growth.

Remember, investing is a dynamic process, and adjustments may be necessary to adapt to changing market conditions and personal circumstances.

Keep up the good work with your investment journey, and feel free to reach out if you need further assistance or guidance. Your dedication to financial planning is truly commendable!

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1465 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 19, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello Sanjeev Sir, Hope you are in good health. I hve just started my investment through SIP in mutual fund . Would you plz advice me on my portfolio. Every month i invest 12k in the below funds . Canara Robeco small cap fund reg Edelweiss mid cap fund reg Hdfc focused 30 fund PGIM India mid cap opp fund SBI Contra fund Sundaram services fund . I have also recentky added Quant small cap fund growth regular plan SIP OF 3K . I want to invest another 10k in sip format plz suggest where should i invest.
Ans: It's fantastic to hear that you're diving into the world of investing through mutual funds. Let's discuss your portfolio and future investments.

Your current selection of funds shows a thoughtful approach to diversification across different segments of the market.

Adding a small-cap fund to your portfolio enhances diversification and potential for higher returns over the long term.

For your additional 10k investment, let's explore options that complement your existing holdings and align with your goals.

Large-cap funds offer stability and are ideal for investors seeking steady returns with lower risk.
Multi-cap funds provide flexibility across market segments, allowing you to capitalize on various opportunities.
It's important to consider your risk tolerance and investment horizon when selecting new funds for your portfolio.

Pls, consult a Certified Financial Planner to guide you every step of the way.

Remember, investing is a journey, and it's normal to have questions and uncertainties along the path.

Stay focused on your goals, and don't hesitate to reach out if you need assistance or advice.

With diligence and patience, you're on track to achieve your financial aspirations.

Keep up the excellent work, and remember that each investment you make brings you closer to your dreams.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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