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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1293 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 29, 2021

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
VG Question by VG on Oct 29, 2021Hindi
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Relationship

Dear Anu, I have a ten year old daughter studying in 5th std in a reputed school of Delhi.

I think the Covid lockdown has had a negative impact on her behaviour.

She has become notoriously obstinate and her behaviour has become a real concern for us.

She has become a compulsive liar and lies mostly for no reason at all. Also she quarrels and fights with other children in the colony.

Please help us to get her back to what she was before lockdown.

Ans: Dear VG, the online structure has messed up the minds of many children and adolescents.

I don’t have much information from you and have to assume that nothing significant has happened after which her behaviour has changed.

Lying and hiding is common when children are scared of doing something that they have been warned against and it could be something that excites her and gives her immense pleasure.

Quarrels and fights is common assuming that your daughter must be around 10 or 11 which is when their struggles for creating their identity causes much ruffles in their minds.

It could also be because of increased usage of the internet as there is enough there to mess with the minds of kids; violence, bullying…the list is endless…

Also, I have been noticing that with the lockdown, kids have forgotten what socialising means and it has become convenient to live at home with free WiFi and food. Convenient pleasure…

Try and be out of home with her every day, good amount of physical activity is a great one too, dancing and pottery are good things for her to indulge in.

It will be a struggle initially; but persist and if necessary one of the parents can become her hobby buddy to help her transition into the ‘normal’ way of life.

Whatever you do, be really patient.

Happy transitioning!

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Image Coach, Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on May 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 23, 2024Hindi
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Hello Madam, My daughter is 12 yr old and is in class 7th. She is not at all interested in studies. She is also not interested in making new friends. She is always busy on playing games on mobile. Studies just one week prior to exams. Her behavior is also becoming rude day by day. Kindly suggest.
Ans: Hello!!
The addiction to mobile after COVID is a menace every parent is facing. The good part is she is aware about her exams and studies at least one week before her exams.

The rude behaviour, lack of focus on studies is all stemming from the mobile games. They are highly addictive and the thrill they give is beyond imagination. Slowly but surely you have to take away the mobile from her, that's the only way to help her look for other sources to keep her busy .Friends, new skills and studies will get her attention only when the mobile is away.

Allocate time for food, sleep, studies, play time and also mobile time( can't just take away the mobile, has to be weaned away from it gradually), in a day. Set a timer for the mobile usage, she has to return the mobile as soon as the timer bell rings.

Pls remember you are the adult here, she is just a child. Guide her, lead her towards better and interesting things to do. You all as a family have to stop sitting with the mobile, start reading books ,play board games , learn a new skill, sing songs, cook together, bake together, you make everything at home an interesting activity, joyful activity, why will a child sit on the mobile?
It is a going to be lot of hard work for you and if the end result of this is seeing your daughter away from the mobile, laughing and talking to her friends, playing around, studying well.....then this is worth all the effort.

..Read more

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I am seeking guidance on my current financial situation. I am 50 years old, with a net take-home income of 1.42 lacs per month, while my wife earns approximately 75k monthly. We have two daughters pursuing higher education, with annual fees totalling 6.10 lacs. In the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic, I faced a significant setback when I was unable to pay my home loan EMI, leading me to opt for a moratorium. Despite having already paid approximately 43.85 lakhs towards my home loan of 58.50 lakhs taken in 2017, the principal outstanding has astonishingly increased to 59.45 lakhs. I now find myself committed to an EMI of 65,000 monthly, further straining our financial resources. To cover both my daughters first-year college fees, I took out a gold loan of 5.5 lakhs, for which I currently pay 50,000 a month. I had invested in a family health insurance policy with Star Health, covering 10 lakhs, but due to poor service I stopped paying my premium, which had an accrued value of 17.50 lakhs. I hold a provident fund account with a balance of 2.5 lakhs. I am concerned about planning for my elder daughter's wedding in the next 2 to 3 years and my retirement. I would appreciate any advice or strategies you could provide to help me navigate this situation effectively.
Ans: Hello;

Try and understand from the home loan lender as to how 59.45 L principal is overdue despite paying a sum of 43.85 L, despite factoring 80% of this as interest payment, the overdue principal should be below 50 L.

Double check if this is as per the terms of moratorium.

If you are not satisfied with replies from the lender escalate the matter to the highest authority at lender or RBI.

Lender can't behave irrationally just because you availed moratorium during COVID.

In my view you should have just sold the gold rather then taking loan against it.

That way you could have lessened EMI burden on your finances and ensured investments for retirement and other goals.

Unfortunately we have a tradition of attaching emotional value to precious metals and real estate.

The best "jewellery" you can offer to your kids is good education, which you have already done.

In matters of health insurance never discontinue a policy due to dissatisfaction with the insurer, port it to another insurer, 1.5/2 months before the renewal date so that your benefits remain intact. Now you may be need to find another health care insurance.

You may begin a monthly sip of 25-30 K in diversified large cap oriented mutual fund for 5 years.

Also give a thought to NPS, you can contribute till 70 age, for retirement pension.

Best wishes;

...Read more

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Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Nov 17, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 15, 2024Hindi
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I am 42 years old male currently working as a software engineer in a private company and drawing 1.1 lakhs per month. I have 2 school going kids. My monthly expenses are around 80K per month including rent. I don't have any personal property in my name. I have invested 50L in postal term deposit(yearly payout), 20L in Shriram transport finance FD(monthly payout), 11 lakh in HDFC balanced fund dividend(monthly payout), 6L in bank FD(monthly payout) all in my wife's name. I have invested 28L in my HUF account against Shriram Transport Finance FD (monthly payout). I have around 20L in EPF and Gratuity. I have around 8 lakhs in miscellaneous Mutual funds with a monthly sip of around 36K. Most of my investments pay me monthly return except this SIP. I have done so as software job is very fragile which can go any time. However I have maxed out on the return I can take per year on my wife's head (7L) and HUF(2.5L) without tax liability. Please advise how I can invest further to get returns so that I can quickly withstand any job loss.
Ans: Hello;

You have already made sufficient provisions to survive a job loss because your passive monthly income is now almost covering your monthly expenses.

But if you need added back-up you may keep expenses worth 6 months(@ 5 L) in a liquid type mutual fund.

Focus on 3 goals;
1. Children's education
2. Retirement
3. House

If you again keep investing in fixed income bearing instruments then you may not be able to grow a corpus to fund these goals.

A mutual fund sip(36 K) is a step in the right direction. I believe these are scheme with Growth option.

Hope you have EPF/NPS/PPF investments as well.

Happy Investing;

...Read more

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