Dear Anu I have been married for 18 years with 2 teenage daughters. My husband has temper issues and I feel he is a perfectionist. He feels that whatever he says or feels is the only correct way to do it. I have a full time job though he earns much more than me. He travels a lot so I am the one running household, kids’ responsibilities, my own job and taking care of a bedridden father in law but nothing seems to matter. Sometimes I feel no matter how much I do it is never enough. I am wearing out, I have become irritated and cynical because of my marital relationship. I thought his anger will subside and he will mellow down with age but it seems to worsen. Something just keep my mouth shut so that he doesn’t pick up one more thing to put me down. I just don’t want to separate because I have 2 wonderful kids for whom we are one happy family. Please advise.

 Hi, Please guide me. I am into 10 years of married life with a son of 7 years, both are working... It's an arranged marriage, but we got 6 months to know each other, initially as usual everything seems to be of roses but then comes with reality check.. We both are extremely incompatible.. our views, thoughts, interest, choices never match.He has the habit of pin pointing on everything I do, it's hard to maintain my calm, as I have to manage school, my son, home everything. He helps in daily chores, we stand together in rough times but otherwise we can't discuss any situation with each other.My mother in law also emotionally abuses me by hurling cheapest meanest nasty comments. My parents never listen to me, they expect me to compromise... I'm tired, frustrated.. could you help?

Hi, I’m a 29 year old working woman. My husband who is 36, left his job 2 years ago just after my child was born. Since then he did not put much efforts to get another job and I’m only taking care of all the financial responsibilities. Whenever I ask him about job, he learns some courses online and then stops learning after few days giving some excuses. This has happened several times. He spends too much of my income even on small things saying he wants best quality products only. Almost everyday he asks me to buy some products or outside food and gets angry if I reject. Myself or my in-laws are not able to force him to get a job because he has anger issues and becomes verbally abusive very quickly. Even my parents are scared of his anger so not able to talk to him regarding his job. I feel very frustrated everyday since me or my family is not able to do anything about this, how do I deal with him?

I am a female 34 married to a 39 Male. I have a 4 year old daughter. Since the very beginning, i spent my savings for household expenses. I had expected him to spend money after my daughter's birth. Most of his income goes towards payment of EMI of 2 houses. I asked him to stop one emi so that we can live properly. He told me that he would always block money in some or the other investment and reduce his disposable income. So I changed my career path to a more lucrative one. I am currently studying to get employedvin such career. Its taking time as inspite of full time maid, i had to take care of her without his support but unnecessary criticism. I have made my own support system, take care of my daughter financially and even take care of her outings. When he is home he takes care of her but he is not consistent . Rather he will pick fights about how i am not a good mother. He has these anger issues where once he is angry he starts shouting, criticizing and sometimes swearing. I learnt to not listen to his words when angry but my daughter heard it twice. After every such fight he would apologize and placate me. But overtime i lost all love for him. He gets triggered by little things like a simple basket and then blow it up. Recently he came drunk and hit me. I asked him to stop and he slapped me twice and then stood near my bed taking about his feelings for 2 hours. The entire incident terrified me and i went back to my parents. I have asked him time and again to get therapy for his anger. I can't let my daughter grow in such environment. I am currently planning to live near my parents and live as a single mother. I am currently preparing for job interviews and the forthcoming exams. I keep hearing that if i am patient he will change. That he will suffer without his daughter. But he is not even considering therapy. Also he can visit her anytime. We live some 12 hours from his location but he can just come over weekends if he wants to. I am financially comfortable now and thus taking few months to set my career. Please advise if my plans are appropriate. I am