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Shalini

Shalini Singh  |168 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on May 09, 2025

Shalini Singh is the founder of andwemet, an online matchmaking service for urban Indians living in India and overseas. After graduating from college as a kindergarten teacher, Singh worked at various firms specialising in marketing strategy, digital marketing and public relations before finding her niche as an entrepreneur. In 2008, she founded Galvanise PR, an independent communications and public relations. In 2019, she launched andwemet.
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Asked by Anonymous - May 09, 2025
Relationship

I was in a 5-year relationship with a man I met online. We were really close and knew each other well but since last year things have been starting to feel off. We used to live in briefly and one day he changed his phone's password and became really secretive with his phone. I didn't bring it up because I didn't want to seem paranoid, but later I found out through his friend's social media that he was seeing someone else. I felt betrayed. It broke my trust, and I felt hurt. I've slowly begun to second guess every relationship since then. He didn't even apologise, but behaves like everything is normal. I have shifted to a new city but something inside me feels broken. How do I move on and feel normal again?

Ans: break ups are not fun. breaking of trust is terrible be it from anyone and more so from someone you love. it is good to hear you moved out of this relationship....and now quoting you "I've slowly begun to second guess every relationship since then" is what you need to stop doing...it is not their fault on what you went through. Be smart and careful as you date. All the best.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1639 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 27, 2022

Relationship
Hello Anu ma’am, I’m 30 years old female, working at an IT firm. I have been married for a year now. The marriage with my husband was arranged by our family members. I met him 2 months before we got married. We talked more during that period and the conversations were always pleasant and I felt care in them and finally made the decision that he is my match. Once we got married, things were good-to-okay in the first few months. I used to live with my in-laws and slowly noticed that he is moving away little by little. My connection with him started to feel weak. He and his mother would stop talking when I entered the room. I had to help more with house chores. I tried quite a lot to keep up with in-laws, husband, and work but soon sensed that mother in law and son have teamed up against me and everything I did was never satisfactory. The first thing that came up to my mind was to move out of the house with my husband and to start our relationship afresh. He didn’t like the idea and for my work reasons, I moved out and to the city where I work (which is a 3-hour drive from where he lives). This made the connection even worse. I used to go see him once or twice in a month but the relationship felt strained so I moved back within 3 months. Around this time he downloaded some dating apps on his mobile. When I asked him about it he said he downloaded out of curiosity and didn’t use it, but I can feel the change in him. Within 2 months I started to realise he’s being secretive with his phone or iPad and is spending a lot of time with them either texting or calls. I also noticed that he is talking to someone during the night while he is sleeping next to me. I felt betrayed and shattered to my core. All the things I learnt for him, all the things that I have done for him and his family, all the time and energy I have spent felt useless. When I confronted him he never accepted it and says it’s all in my head. I gave him some time leaving it aside thinking he would bounce back once he is done with it. So I asked him to move in with me so we could bond and spend time alone. We moved in together finally but things didn’t go as I expected. When I leave for work he would either go meet the woman or worse bring her home. He continued it and I ran out of patience. I talked about it with my family and his. My family supports my decision with whatever I would want to do and his family would back him up saying that they have brought their son up my utmost values and he wouldn’t do such a thing. So finally they have sent us back to our homes hoping things will be fine. He still talks to the woman every night and God knows how many times I cannot make it out in the day time. I’m sorry it’s a long read for you but I wasn’t sure what to express and what not to, for you to help me with a suggestion.I have tried to catch his act using technology but he is too clever to be caught. Trust me, I’m a tech lead at an IT firm and I have tried a lot of methods to catch him but all of them are valid-invalid proofs and he is quite a story teller to make them all look null.I feel nothing inside most of the times and simply want to come out of this but not without showing his true form. For once, I want to win. Win huge this way. If you can help me out I will be grateful for that. Please keep me anonymous if you could.Thanks a lot for reading this.
Ans:

Dear TK,

Thank you for sharing so clearly; it certainly helps me guide in the best possible manner.

If you feel that he is infidel, the there is no necessity to go around looking for proof.

What will proving that give you?

Even if you showed it all to his parents what is the guarantee that they will not turn it around and blame you for it?

That you should not have moved out and that’s why he needed the comfort of other women.

Quit focusing on proving his infidelity and focus on more what you want at this point in time.

Do you want to continue in this marriage?

If NO, exit in the most graceful manner because the stress from all the pulling down or Win that you are looking for is strenuous and of no use. It will only appease your EGO which anyway is short-lived.

But of course, if you are in the process of negotiating terms during divorce proceedings; this proof maybe valuable to have a better WIN. I hope I have succeeded in differentiating both types of WINs so you get a clearer picture.

Now coming to how you must deal with your mind space is as simple as listing down what is important to you.

Is it dwelling on what he does or emphasizing more on what you can do?

When it’s the latter, you will think and act in a manner that looks out for you and how you can keep yourself in an optimum mind space.

So, start focusing on what makes you happy and stick to that.

When you are ready to move on, make it graceful and if there seems to be a problem with negotiation, the proof that you have collected with a sane sense of mind will come in handy.

I assume that there are no children involved but if there are, take into consideration how they will cope with any decision of yours.

Bottom Line: Learn to live your life and focus on what’s important. I am confident that you can do this NOW.

All the best for a beautiful mind space!

..Read more

Love Guru

Love Guru   | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on May 30, 2022

Relationship
Dear Love Guru, From where should I begin? It's a rather complex one. Well, I was in a 6-year-old long distance relationship (we met on Facebook) it was a good one and he was the best friend I thought I wanted. Over the years though, I started seeing a controlling streak in him in whatever I did. Though we were only connected online but applications like Discord, having access to my accounts and passwords became a tool to keep tabs on me. I had no privacy of my own and the sad part, I didn't even realise it was toxic. He had taken hold of a lot of aspects of my life and I didn't even realise how unhealthy it is. It was last year when I lost my mother (having lost my father years back) when life hit me. I was completing first year of my MBA programme when this tragedy occurred. Her passing amidst the COVID 2nd wave was terrorising, to say the least. Thankfully, I had gem of friends who were there throughout. It was amidst this that I realised that there was an element of control in the support he provided. He didn't understand the magnitude of what I was going through and always undermined my efforts. There was no respect in him for me and for me there was no love left (when I introspect now I think I was more in love with idea of love rather than loving him) but I didn't realise this because I was so habituated with him. My MBA summer internship started and I was paired with this batchmate who was also a classmate. I didn't know him because COVID ensured that first year of PG is completely online. When I first met him. I found him to be stiff, rude and cribbing. I didn't realise he was an introvert. Eventually, I started warming up to him with us travelling almost two months together there developed a thickness. We bonded over our shared state, food and sadness of losing our mothers. I didn't even realise when I started getting attracted to him and neither did he. But when I did the first thing that I did was to break up with the guy I was with because for the first time in six years I was tilting towards someone else and I knew that this was it for us. The break-up was long, tiresome and hurtful for both of us. I hated hurting him but I couldn't be with him and suffocate myself any longer. We tried to wish each other well but then when has all this been anything but ending up in a train wreck and now we don't have any contact with each other. I keep him in prayers and wishes because I know he is not a bad human being it's just that I allowed him to walk over me and he kept on doing it without realising what he is doing is mental abuse. But it's not the story of me and my ex. It's the story of the guy I have come to love. The rude, stiff and cribby guy… who knew he would turn out be this sensitive, loving and appreciative soul. I got what I always wanted from someone I loved: respect, trust and appreciation. It's not like I don't have fights with him or arguments but there is a dialogue at the end. He understands where he went wrong and so do I. I am finally in a happy, healthy relationship. The only issue here is we both are from two different religions, I am H and he is M. This often makes me feel that there is a timer to us. We are two highly educated people from urban India, completing our post-graduation from one of India's top B-schools with great placements in hand and still the noose of society and religion is tied around our neck. I try not to think of us in the long term but I am on that side of 20s now that settling down is always on my mind. Especially after losing my parents, I often crave a family that is my own. There is also a hint of loss hovering over me. I still haven't moved on from losing my mother and I don't think I ever will. But last one year has been a roller coaster ride with major decisions and incidences. How do I wrap my head around all of this? Now, here I am between love, life and ambitions. Asking you what to do? Where to go? Which road should be taken? Regards, R PS: Please ensure anonymity.
Ans:

Dear R, religion plays as big or as small a role in your life as you wish it to.

If either of you is overtly religious and tries to force your beliefs on the other, then yes, it can prove a problem.

If religion inside a home doesn’t matter, then intermarried couples usually have years of happy celebrations together of all festivals, their children follow both customs and everything works out well. And I have seen that happen.

So I would suggest you have the conversation on religion with each other right now, it’s imperative.

And then, if you’re on the same page concerning your future, go ahead and plan it together. 

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |615 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 20, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 16, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Currently, I am in a relationship with my boyfriend for the past 5 months. He has been in love with me for the last 5 years and I have been aware about it. We had a love hate relationship for the last 5 years where I have also dated another guy. But after getting into a relationship with him, I came to know that he had gone out with other girls, while he had claimed that he was in love with me and could not be with anyone else. I am aware that since we were not together, he was allowed to hangout with other females and maybe get a bit physically close to them, but now I cannot wrap my mind around the fat that he did those. The thought of him with someone else disturbs me, and I have a pretty hard time trusting him. We have had discussions at length with him, but nothing seems to dissolve my uncomfortability towards it. I do love him a lot and want this to work out and he claims to love me a lot as well. What do I do?
Ans: Dear Anonymous, It sounds like you're dealing with a complex situation that involves a mix of past history, trust issues, and conflicting emotions.Continue having open and honest conversations with your boyfriend about your feelings. Share your concerns, fears, and any insecurities you might have Reflect on the past and try to understand the context in which both of you had other relationships. Keep in mind that during that time, you weren't officially committed to each other. Understanding this might help you rationalize those experiences and move forward.Clearly communicate your expectations and establish boundaries for your current relationship. Discuss what is acceptable behavior for both of you and make sure you are on the same page regarding exclusivity and commitment.Trust is crucial in any relationship. It takes time to rebuild, but consistent actions, transparency, and open communication can help. If he's willing, he should be patient and understanding as you work through your feelings.Take some time for self-reflection. Understand your own insecurities and fears and work on building your own confidence. Sometimes, addressing personal issues can positively impact the relationship dynamics.If you're committed to making the relationship work, it's essential to find a way to forgive and let go of the past. Holding onto resentment can hinder the growth of the relationship.

Remember that every relationship is unique, and it's normal to face challenges. However, it's crucial for both partners to be committed to working through these challenges together. If the discomfort persists and affects your well-being, it's important to prioritize your own happiness and make decisions that are in your best interest.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |609 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Aug 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 18, 2024Hindi
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Janak

Janak Patel  |57 Answers  |Ask -

MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 07, 2025Hindi
Money
Hello Janak Sir.. hope you are doing well..I am 43 year old having 2 daughter 13 and 4 year).Currently I am having 75 lac in MF ,20 lac in FD, around 26 lac in PF and around 5 lakh in other investments.I have 2 houses one is loan free and getting rent for 10000 pm from it.For other flat where I am residing 29 lakh loan is pending and also having 6 lakh loan for car.I am investigating 55000 in MF per month.I am in hand income of 280000.My questions should I start paying loan fast for home loan(7 per) and car loan (9.2 per) by paying on lump sum to become debt free in 4 -5 year or increase SIP in MF?
Ans: Hi,

Your Financials look reasonably good even with some liabilities. Your liabilities stand at about 28% of your assets and 12.5 times your income, which is a healthy ratio by itself.

Your PF amount should not be considered for the purpose you have mentioned and let it remain for retirement. This amount may be earning about 8%, but its completely tax exempt and you should only think to withdraw post retirement.

You have mentioned 5 lakhs in other investments, you will need to evaluate these for liquidity and returns to support the below recommendations. If they are earning better returns than loan rates mentioned then do continue, else you can consider to liquidate and service the loan.

Car Loan -
Your car loan of 6 lakhs is at 9.2%, which I am sure is higher than the returns on your FDs. Returns from FDs are also taxable and clubbed into your income. Even at 7% interest you are effectively getting lower returns (under 5%) post tax. You will be in the highest tax backet based on income. So the car loan should be immediately closed with amounts from the FDs.

Home Loan -
You must be claiming some tax benefits for the home loan in your taxes. You can similarly decide if the benefits is better than the FD returns. Without EMI details, I can only assume and in a lot of cases they are better and hence claiming tax benefits continues. Also with your financial standing you can continue and build wealth now as the returns from Mutual fund investments will out weigh the pre-payment on the loan.
In numbers, lets consider you pay off the home loan amount of 29 lakhs in 5 years, your monthly contribution will be 57K and you would have paid approx. 34.25 lakhs to the bank. If you invest the same 57k monthly in Mutual funds, you would accumulate 47 lakhs in 5 years at 12% returns.

So yes continue with your SIPs and top them up with additional amounts you can and build a good corpus for the future.
Also the remaining FDs amount of 14 lakhs after paying the car loan can be better deployed. Keep about 3 months expenses in FDs and the rest can be moved to a Hybrid Mutual fund (e.g. HDFC balanced advantage fund) to earn better returns.
With 2 daughters, you will be looking to provide them education and better life until they are independent, so every rupee towards that big corpus is going be beneficial in the long run.

Do ensure you have sufficient term life cover and health cover for the family.
You can consult a CFP or a fee based advisor to get a comprehensive financial plan personalized for yourself. It will be worth the effort and money for a secured and bright future for the family.

Thanks & Regards
Janak Patel
Certified Financial Planner.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8439 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 10, 2025Hindi
Career
My kcet 2025 rank is 37964 GM category Which top colleges can I get a seat in for ECE?
Ans: With a KCET rank of 37,964 in the General Merit category, you can secure confirmed seats in reputable ECE programs at institutions whose closing ranks exceed your score and that maintain key strengths—accredited curricula, experienced faculty, modern labs, industry linkages, active research and placement support averaging over 80% in the last three years. These include MVJ College of Engineering, Bangalore (ECE closing rank ~34,103), Ghousia Engineering College, Ramanagara (closing rank up to 39,498), SKSJT Institute of Engineering, Bangalore (closing rank ~28,046), Dr. T. Thimmaiah Institute of Technology, Kolar (closing rank ~27,561), New Horizon College of Engineering, Bengaluru (closing rank ~26,172), Sri Siddhartha Institute of Technology, Tumkur (ECE closing rank ~36,157), Oxford College of Engineering, Bangalore (high closing ranks for ECE seats), Maratha Mandal Engineering College, Belgaum (ECE closing rank ~117,323), Basaveshwara Engineering College, Bagalkot (closing rank ~122,228) and P.E.S. College of Engineering, Mandya (closing rank ~29,291). These colleges combine solid academic ecosystems, practical training and consistent recruiter engagement.

Recommendation: MVJ College of Engineering Bangalore for its balanced academics and placement consistency, followed by Ghousia Engineering College and SKSJT Institute of Engineering for strong infrastructure and alumni networks, then Dr. T. Thimmaiah IT Kolar, New Horizon Bengaluru and Sri Siddhartha Tumkur for robust industry ties. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8439 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8439 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Career
Hello sir I am Divya and I am studying in great world and I choose PCB I want to do engineering Computer Science or can I do what will be my future career and does it suits
Ans: Divya, PCB students can now pursue B.Tech in Computer Science under NEP-2020 provisions and UGC’s 2025 guidelines, provided they clear national or university entrance exams and complete bridge courses in mathematics during early semesters, ensuring strong analytical foundations and industry-relevant skills for software development, AI, data science, cybersecurity and beyond. Ten top private institutions with high NIRF 2024?rankings that accept any stream via entrance tests include VIT Vellore (11), SRM Institute Chennai (13), BITS Pilani (20), Amrita Vishwa Vidyapeetham (23), Siksha ‘O’ Anusandhan (26), Thapar Institute (29), Amity University Noida (30), Chandigarh University, KL University Guntur (35) and SASTRA Thanjavur (38), all offering robust CSE curricula, modern labs, interdisciplinary research, strong industry tie-ups and 80–95% placement rates over the past three years.

Recommendation: Embrace Computer Science through a B.Tech with mathematics bridge support, targeting VIT Vellore and SRM Chennai for premier facilities, followed by BITS Pilani and Amrita for research excellence; consider Siksha ‘O’ Anusandhan and Thapar for balanced academics and placements. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8439 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 10, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir, I got 94.51%ile in jee mains. I am confused as to which college should I choose in the cap round. Please suggest me a college for the branch Artificial Intelligence and data science, special in location like pune and mumbai.
Ans: With a 94.51 percentile, you can target Artificial Intelligence & Data Science seats in CAP rounds at several Pune–Mumbai institutions whose closing percentiles fall below your score, ensuring high admission probability while offering robust academics, modern labs, industry linkages, active research initiatives and strong placement cells averaging 80–90% over the past three years. Reputed choices include Vishwakarma Institute of Information Technology, Kondhwa (94.12%ile); Pune Vidyarthi Griha’s College of Engineering & Technology (91.71%ile); Pimpri Chinchwad College of Engineering, Pune (90.43%ile); Rizvi College of Engineering, Mumbai (87.47%ile); Dr. D.Y. Patil Institute of Technology, Pimpri (90.43%ile); Rajiv Gandhi Institute of Technology, Mumbai (87.35%ile); Terna Engineering College, Navi Mumbai (86.12%ile); and Vidyavardhini’s College of Engineering & Technology, Vasai (81.01%ile).

Recommendation: Prioritize Vishwakarma Institute of IT Kondhwa for its cutting-edge AI syllabus and placement record, followed by Pune Vidyarthi Griha’s CET and Pimpri Chinchwad College for strong industry partnerships; keep Rizvi Mumbai and Rajiv Gandhi Mumbai as high-value alternatives. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9620 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Money
Hi sir, i am employee and age 39. I have 1. Home loan 62 L, tenure 240 months EMIs and 50k emi just stared from May-2025 and 2.home loan 11.8L, tenure 84 months EMIs and 19k emi. My monthly income in hand 1.06k. My PPF having 1L, Sukanya Samurdhi 2.2L, NPS having 21.8 L, SIP started with 10k per month from Aug-24 and equity having 1.5L. Family property received 10 acre dry land and 1 L per annum is coming. And i purchased 3 plots with 33L now worth 75L with earlier savings and PL i.e. all before 2017. Tel me better management of loans and savings. My retirement is April-2046, my son 7th class and daughter 1st class.
Ans: You are managing multiple loans and investments. Now let's work on a complete 360-degree solution for better financial management.

Understanding Your Current Financial Situation
– You are 39 years old with retirement in April 2046.
– You earn Rs 1.06 lakh monthly, which is a decent income.
– Your home loan is Rs 62 lakh with Rs 50,000 EMI for 20 years.
– You also have another home loan of Rs 11.8 lakh with Rs 19,000 EMI for 7 years.
– Your total EMI burden is Rs 69,000 monthly.

– PPF balance is Rs 1 lakh and Sukanya Samriddhi is Rs 2.2 lakh.
– You have Rs 21.8 lakh in NPS.
– Equity investments are around Rs 1.5 lakh.
– A SIP of Rs 10,000 started recently, which is a good step.
– You receive Rs 1 lakh yearly income from dry land.
– You also hold 3 plots now valued at Rs 75 lakh.

Your family consists of your spouse, son in 7th class, and daughter in 1st class.

Assessing Your Current Cash Flow
– Total EMI is Rs 69,000 out of Rs 1.06 lakh income.
– This leaves you with only around Rs 37,000 for all other expenses.

If your monthly expenses are higher, your savings will suffer.
So, your loans are eating a big part of your income now.

Analysing the Home Loans in Detail
Home Loan 1: Rs 62 Lakh, 240 Months
– EMI started in May 2025, EMI is Rs 50,000.
– This is a long-term loan, so interest outgo is large.

Home Loan 2: Rs 11.8 Lakh, 84 Months
– EMI is Rs 19,000, with 7-year tenure.
– This is a smaller and shorter loan.

Which Loan to Prepay First?
– Always prepay the small loan first.
– Prepay the Rs 11.8 lakh loan faster.
– This will free up Rs 19,000 EMI within 3 to 4 years.
– After clearing it, you can focus on the bigger loan.

Managing Investments and Loans Simultaneously
Don’t stop all your investments to pay loans.
But also don’t invest heavily while loans are pending.

Split your surplus cash wisely:

– Use part of your dry land income to prepay the small home loan.
– Use any yearly bonuses and incentives for loan prepayment.
– Don’t use equity or PPF for loan repayment now.

Your SIP of Rs 10,000 should continue.
This builds wealth for long-term goals.

Building Your Emergency Fund First
Before prepaying loans, build an emergency fund.
Keep at least 6 months of household expenses.

Park this in a liquid mutual fund or sweep-in FD.

This gives financial protection during job loss or medical issues.

Reviewing Your Insurance Cover
Check if you have pure term life insurance.
If not, buy it immediately for Rs 75 lakh to Rs 1 crore.

This will protect your family during your loan tenure.

Don’t mix insurance with investments like ULIPs.
Buy health insurance for the full family if not done yet.

Managing Existing Investments Wisely
– PPF and Sukanya are for long-term goals. Continue them yearly.
– NPS will support your retirement. Don't withdraw it early.
– Equity holding is small. Don't sell it now. Let it grow.

Your SIP of Rs 10,000 is a good start.
Keep increasing it by 10% every year.

Don’t stop mutual fund SIPs while paying loans.
You need both loan clearance and wealth creation together.

Avoiding Real Estate as an Investment
Your 3 plots have grown in value from Rs 33 lakh to Rs 75 lakh.
But plots don’t give regular income.

If you plan to use them for selling later, it is fine.
But don’t buy new plots for investment.

Real estate is illiquid and takes time to sell.
Also, managing dry land is not a consistent income source.

Future savings should focus on mutual funds, not plots or land.

Making Use of Dry Land Income
The Rs 1 lakh yearly income from land is helpful.

Use this income as below:

– 50% towards emergency fund and loan prepayment.
– 50% towards child’s future or your SIP top-up.

This way your passive income is also working for your goals.

Children’s Education Planning
Your son is in 7th class. Daughter in 1st class.

Their higher education will cost more in 7 to 10 years.

Start separate SIPs for their college education.
Allocate at least Rs 5,000 to Rs 7,500 for each child’s goal.

Mutual funds help beat inflation over the long term.

Don’t rely on Sukanya Samriddhi alone for your daughter.
It is safe but offers lower growth compared to equity mutual funds.

Retirement Planning Perspective
Your retirement is 21 years away in 2046.

NPS corpus is building well. Continue regular contributions.

Along with NPS, grow your equity mutual fund investments.
They will give higher growth in your working years.

Later, shift to balanced funds closer to retirement.

Cash Flow Management Month by Month
Your cash flow is tight due to high EMIs.

Try this plan:

– Household and lifestyle expenses: Rs 30,000 to Rs 35,000.
– EMIs: Rs 69,000.
– SIPs: Rs 10,000.
– Emergency fund build-up: Rs 2,000 to Rs 5,000.

If expenses exceed this, cut down on lifestyle spends.
Postpone luxury buys and vacations for 3 to 4 years.

Suggested Loan Prepayment Strategy Timeline
Year 1 to 4:

– Build emergency fund first.
– Prepay the small home loan slowly.
– Try to clear the Rs 11.8 lakh loan in 4 years.

Year 5 onwards:

– Focus on the Rs 62 lakh loan.
– Increase prepayment using the freed Rs 19,000 EMI.
– Target to close it in 10 to 12 years instead of 20.

This reduces your debt burden before retirement.

Should You Sell the Plots?
Don’t sell them immediately unless facing a cash crunch.
Plots have appreciated well and may grow further.

But if your cash flow becomes very tight, sell one plot.
Use the sale proceeds to clear the bigger home loan partly.

Selling plots reduces your interest burden faster.

Discuss this step with a Certified Financial Planner before selling.

Future Financial Milestones to Focus On
– Build Rs 5 lakh emergency fund in 3 years.
– Clear the small home loan in 4 years.
– Increase your SIPs gradually to Rs 20,000 monthly.
– Build your children's higher education fund in 10 years.
– Clear the big home loan 5 years before retirement.
– Build a retirement corpus to cover 25 to 30 years post-retirement.

Why You Shouldn’t Pause SIPs for Loans
Some people pause SIPs to repay loans fast.
This is wrong because they lose long-term compounding.

Keep your SIPs running while prepaying loans side by side.
This balance builds both wealth and peace of mind.

Avoid Index Funds and Direct Funds
Don’t choose index funds.

– Index funds blindly follow the market.
– They don’t protect you in market crashes.
– Actively managed funds give better long-term results.

Also, avoid direct mutual funds.

– Direct funds give no expert guidance.
– You will be confused during market falls.

Instead, invest in regular funds through an MFD holding CFP credential.
They provide handholding, monitoring, and rebalancing.

This is very important for a working family man like you.

Keeping a Long-Term View
Don’t get stressed by your present EMI load.
In 3 to 5 years, your cash flow will ease.

Your children’s education, your retirement, and a debt-free life are achievable.
Stay disciplined and avoid distractions like real estate investments.

Finally
Your financial journey has good foundations already.
Two things need improvement now. First, your high loan burden. Second, consistent wealth creation.

Take these steps next:

– Focus first on clearing the small home loan in 4 years.
– Continue SIPs and grow them over time.
– Avoid any more real estate purchases.
– Use dry land income wisely for wealth building and debt clearing.
– Review your plan yearly with a Certified Financial Planner.

In the long term, you will achieve both debt freedom and wealth growth.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9620 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 30, 2025Hindi
Money
Planning to retire now at age of 50. My assets are 65L in PF,60L in PPF. 20L IN SSA, NPS 24L, ICICI PRU pension 13L, lic jeevan shanthi 14L, FD 100L. My monthly expenses 75000 Real estate woth 100L. NO Liabilities.
Ans: Planning retirement at age 50 is a bold move. You have built assets carefully. Now the focus should be on income, sustainability, and safety.

Let’s assess your financial position from all angles. I will explain in a simple and step-by-step manner.

Your Retirement Goal and Key Considerations
– You are 50 years old and wish to retire now.
– Monthly expenses are Rs. 75,000. That is Rs. 9 lakhs yearly.
– You may live 35+ years post-retirement.
– Your funds must last till 85–90 years of age.
– Inflation will reduce value of Rs. 75,000 over time.

You need income that grows every year. Fixed income is not enough.

Total Financial Assets at Present
Let us list your liquid and financial assets.

– PF: Rs. 65 lakhs
– PPF: Rs. 60 lakhs
– SSA: Rs. 20 lakhs
– NPS: Rs. 24 lakhs
– ICICI PRU Pension: Rs. 13 lakhs
– LIC Jeevan Shanti: Rs. 14 lakhs
– Fixed Deposits: Rs. 100 lakhs

This totals to Rs. 296 lakhs or Rs. 2.96 crores.

This is a solid foundation. You’ve done well.

Real Estate – Not a Retirement Resource
– You mentioned real estate worth Rs. 100 lakhs.
– But it is not liquid. It cannot give you monthly income.
– It is not counted as part of retirement corpus.
– Only consider it if you plan to sell or rent it.

Avoid counting real estate as your retirement support.

EPF – Solid but Withdrawal Must Be Planned
– Your PF amount is Rs. 65 lakhs.
– It is a great long-term resource.
– It earns interest but reduces after retirement.
– Withdraw slowly. Don’t touch entire amount.
– Use this only for medium-term income needs.

Don’t keep it idle. Also don’t exhaust it fast.

PPF – Safe and Tax-Free, But Not Liquid
– You have Rs. 60 lakhs in PPF.
– It gives safe and tax-free returns.
– But it has withdrawal limits.
– You can use partial withdrawals yearly.

Use this for your tax-free income ladder later.

SSA – For Daughter’s Future, Not Retirement
– You have Rs. 20 lakhs in Sukanya Samriddhi Account.
– This is strictly for daughter’s future.
– It matures when she turns 21.
– Don’t use this for retirement.

This is a separate goal and cannot support monthly income.

NPS – Locked Till 60
– Your NPS corpus is Rs. 24 lakhs.
– You cannot withdraw full amount now.
– Only 20% is allowed before age 60.
– Rest 80% must be converted later.

Don’t plan income from NPS immediately. Consider it post age 60.

ICICI PRU Pension – Low Liquidity, Limited Growth
– You have Rs. 13 lakhs in pension product.
– Liquidity and returns are usually limited.
– Review surrender value and charges.
– You may consider surrender if it’s past lock-in.
– Shift to flexible mutual fund-based retirement solution.

Insurance-pension products underperform compared to mutual funds.

LIC Jeevan Shanti – Income Unclear
– Rs. 14 lakhs is locked in LIC Jeevan Shanti.
– It is an annuity-type product.
– Low flexibility and low income.
– You cannot exit or restructure easily.

Continue taking income from it, but don’t invest further.

Fixed Deposits – Too Much Allocation
– You have Rs. 100 lakhs in fixed deposits.
– This is a very high portion in debt.
– FD interest is taxable.
– FD returns rarely beat inflation.
– Long-term money must grow better.

Reduce FD allocation over time. Shift some to mutual funds for growth.

Monthly Expense of Rs. 75,000 – Will Keep Rising
– Today it is Rs. 75,000 monthly.
– In 10 years, it may become Rs. 1.4 lakhs.
– In 20 years, may cross Rs. 2.5 lakhs monthly.
– Your retirement income must grow to match this.

Don’t build a flat income plan. Build a growing income plan.

Safe Withdrawal Strategy is Key
– Withdraw only what you need each year.
– Don’t break all accounts in one go.
– Create three buckets: short-term, medium, long-term.

Short-term (next 3 years):
– Use FD and small withdrawals from PF/PPF.

Medium-term (4 to 10 years):
– Use balanced and hybrid mutual funds.

Long-term (beyond 10 years):
– Use equity mutual funds for growth.
– These will support you from age 60 onwards.

You Should Build Mutual Fund Corpus Now
– You have not mentioned mutual funds yet.
– That’s a gap in your retirement mix.
– Mutual funds give flexible, inflation-beating growth.
– Use SWP method for monthly income.

Shift some FD into mutual funds. Plan with Certified Financial Planner.

Do Not Consider Index Funds
– Index funds just copy the market.
– They don’t protect during market falls.
– Active funds manage volatility better.
– You need dependable income and not market-linked surprises.

Avoid index funds. Use actively managed mutual funds only.

Direct Mutual Funds – Avoid if Used
– If you invest in direct plans, you get no support.
– Mistakes in fund choice and timing hurt returns.
– Use regular plans with a Certified Financial Planner.
– You get monitoring, advice, and emotional support.

Regular plan with CFP adds long-term value and peace of mind.

Retirement Plan Must Be Reviewed Yearly
– Inflation and market performance keep changing.
– Track your spending and income every year.
– Rebalance your investment mix with expert help.
– Avoid over-withdrawing in early years.

Retirement is not one-time event. It needs yearly tuning.

Emergency Buffer Must Be Separate
– Keep 12 months of expenses in ultra-safe assets.
– Use short-term FD, liquid mutual fund, or sweep account.
– This protects you during any income gap or emergency.

Emergency funds must not be mixed with long-term plans.

Tax Planning Will Impact Real Returns
– FD interest is fully taxable.
– PPF and EPF are tax-free.
– Mutual fund capital gains are taxed:

LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh at 12.5%

STCG at 20%
– Plan withdrawal to reduce tax every year.

Tax planning will increase your real income over 35+ years.

Protection Planning Must Be in Place
– Check health insurance cover.
– Should be minimum Rs. 20–25 lakhs.
– Add super top-up if needed.
– Review if you still need life insurance.

Medical cost is one big threat in retirement.

Real Estate – Keep It for Peace of Mind Only
– Don’t count property in your retirement plan.
– It gives no income unless rented.
– Selling it may take time and has tax issues.
– Keep it as fallback or asset transfer to children.

Real estate is not liquid or income-friendly. Keep expectations realistic.

Your Plan is Almost There – Few Gaps Remain
– You have good corpus.
– You have no liabilities.
– You are not investing in mutual funds – that’s a gap.
– FD is over-used. Needs partial shift.
– You are not factoring inflation yet.
– Your insurance-linked plans restrict liquidity.

With some tuning, you can retire securely now.

Finally
– You have saved wisely across multiple assets.
– You have no debt, which is a strength.
– Monthly income of Rs. 75,000 is possible.
– But it must grow every few years.
– Don’t depend only on FDs or pensions.
– Use mutual funds for growth and flexibility.
– Avoid index funds and direct funds.
– Keep PPF, PF, NPS for future income stages.
– Review plan every year with Certified Financial Planner.
– Keep healthcare and emergency fund active.

Retirement at 50 is possible. But requires disciplined management ahead.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9620 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 30, 2025Hindi
Money
I am a 36 year old, have a dependent wife and recently switched my job with 17000 to 37000. In 37000 I have to pay 10000 food and other expenses,and 10000 rent. My savings is hardly any as all goes in emi and still few I am unable to pay for past 5 months.Recently got married in December and having personal loan of 170000, 40000,40000, 230000 and gold loans of 550000. I lost my savings and got into debt because of losing money in stock trading. I lost around 7 lakhs. 230000 personal loan is for a period of 5 years and already paid 1.5 yrs, rest personal loan are through app and for short period. For the past 5 months I am unable to pay them any installment and asked them for grace period and waiver and also one time settlement with time. I am in great stress and I don't know how to come out of it. I need your suggestion. If you need any more info for better understanding please let me know.
Ans: Understanding Your Current Situation
– You are 36 years old
– Your monthly income is now Rs. 37,000
– Expenses for food and rent come to Rs. 20,000
– That leaves Rs. 17,000 before any loan payments

– You have gold loans worth Rs. 5.5 lakh
– You have multiple personal loans totalling Rs. 4.8 lakh
– So total outstanding loan is nearly Rs. 10.3 lakh

– For past 5 months, you are unable to pay some EMIs
– Your savings have been wiped out due to stock trading losses

– You are newly married and have a dependent spouse
– Emotional stress is very natural in this phase
– But please know, this is a temporary phase

– With structured steps, you can recover

First Steps You Must Take Now
– Do not panic or feel alone
– Financial struggles happen to many, recovery is always possible

– Stop any form of stock market activity
– Do not trade or invest until your debt is cleared

– Make your spouse aware of the situation
– Transparency will reduce pressure on you

– Write down all your loans with amount, lender name, and EMI amount
– Prioritise loans with high interest or legal risk

– App-based loans often charge high interest and penalties
– These can grow fast if not handled on time

– Keep all communication with these app lenders in writing
– Always email them or talk through the official app chat
– Do not speak with recovery agents unofficially or under pressure

Segregate Loans by Nature
Gold Loan
– Amount: Rs. 5.5 lakh
– It is secured loan. Your gold is the collateral
– This should be prioritised after legal loans

– Try not to default for long, or you may lose the pledged gold

– But this can be handled slightly later than app loans

Personal Loans through Banks/NBFC
– Rs. 2.3 lakh loan with 3.5 years left
– Plus other loans of Rs. 1.7 lakh and Rs. 40,000 each

– Bank/NBFC loans are structured and regulated
– Speak with these lenders and request restructuring or settlement

– Show proof of income drop and recent marriage
– Some may allow EMI deferment or lower EMI

– Avoid taking new loans to repay these

App-Based Loans
– These loans usually carry very high rates
– They may harass you with calls and messages

– Email their customer care and request a one-time settlement
– Explain that your income is limited and you are willing to pay in parts

– Take screenshots of your emails or chats for record
– Do not accept verbal promises

– If they threaten or misuse your contact list, you can file a police complaint
– Harassment by digital lenders is now punishable

Restructure or Close Loans One by One
– Focus on settling one loan at a time
– Start with smallest or high-stress app loans
– Even if you save Rs. 3,000/month, you can close small loans in time

– Request one-time settlements for overdue loans
– Start repaying once they agree on reduced amount

– Gold loan should be addressed once unsecured loans are under control
– You can also ask gold loan provider for EMI-based repayment option

– If possible, borrow interest-free from family to close any one loan
– But do not borrow again to pay another loan unless it’s zero-interest

Household Budgeting to Create Monthly Surplus
– Right now, you have Rs. 17,000 left after rent and food
– Create a very strict budget for now
– Avoid online purchases, subscriptions, or eating out

– Set aside Rs. 10,000 monthly only for debt
– The rest can be for phone bill, transport, etc.

– Every single rupee should go into priority-based loan repayment
– In next few months, small wins will reduce your mental burden

Increase Income With Temporary Side Income
– Explore freelance, weekend work, or part-time online jobs
– Focus on skill-based extra income like tuition, typing, or delivery apps

– Even Rs. 5,000 extra monthly can fast-track your repayment

– Avoid thinking too long term for now
– Every short-term gain can ease your pressure

Credit Score and Future Access
– Right now, your credit score may be falling due to missed EMIs
– But once you repay or settle even a few loans, it starts improving

– Ask for “No Due Certificate” after each settlement or closure
– Keep all records for future reference

– Do not apply for new loans until existing ones are cleared

– In future, avoid personal loans for non-emergency needs

– Build credit again slowly with secured cards or small EMIs later

Stop All Risky Investments Now
– Do not put money in stocks, trading, or crypto
– You already faced big loss of Rs. 7 lakh
– That must not be repeated again

– Learn from it, but do not feel ashamed
– Take this phase as a valuable financial lesson

– Once stable, build long-term wealth only through proper mutual fund SIPs

– Use regular mutual funds with guidance from Certified Financial Planner

Should You Use Direct Mutual Funds Later?
– Direct funds look cheaper, but they have no personalised help
– No one will guide you during market fall or life changes

– You may stop SIP in panic or invest in wrong category

– Regular mutual funds through a trusted Certified Financial Planner offer help
– They offer timely review, rebalancing, and goal tracking

– That makes the cost worth it and returns more steady

– So when you are ready, choose regular plan over direct

Mental Health and Family Support
– Financial stress also affects health and relationship
– Don’t hide the burden from your spouse or close family

– Explain your step-by-step plan to them
– Their emotional support can strengthen you

– Avoid social media distractions or online offers promising fast loans or trading profits

– Stay grounded, follow the basics, and focus only on clearing one loan at a time

Talk to a Certified Financial Planner
– Once your loan burden is lighter, consult a Certified Financial Planner
– They can create a full plan for your long-term goals
– They also help track expenses, risk, and savings in a realistic way

– This builds discipline and gives clear goals to work toward

– Don’t wait to become rich to seek expert help
– Expert advice early helps recover faster and smarter

Finally
Your situation may feel tough today. But it is not permanent. With patience and right steps, you can come out stronger.

Start with a clear list of loans. Focus on one closure at a time. Do not take new loans. Avoid risk investments. Control expenses. And most importantly, keep mental calm.

Remember, building wealth comes after clearing debt. And financial freedom comes only with peace of mind.

You are already on the right track by asking for help. Keep moving forward.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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