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30-Year-Old Introverted Woman Struggling with Dating - Seeking Advice

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Anu Krishna  |1563 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 18, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 11, 2025Hindi
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Hi, I am a 30 year old working woman. I am pretty introvert and never have been in a relationship. Men have never approached me maybe because of my closed off nature. My mother has been constantly pressing me to look for a potential match for last 3-4 years. I have been trying dating apps and matrimony apps and have gone on a lot of dates but till now there has been no success. This entire process is taking a toll on me. When I say this to my mother she will not listen and instead keeps on searching for matches herself and make me go on dates which ultimately doesn't last since none of them seem to be compatible (mainly because of difference in family background, salary differences , values mismatch,etc). At this point I am confused. I do want to settle down for the sake of life long companionship but feel that things aren't working for me and sometimes my frustrations make me feel that I am good not married. What should I do in this case?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
When the right person comes along, you will know it. Until then, enjoy the process without being too attached to the outcome. If something clicks, then it does...why fret over anything?
Your mother is just doing what she is out of love and concern; so, let her! By pushing her back it will only heighten her concern and it will come back to you in other unhealthy ways. Go along with it and just play the wait and watch game. A good way to convert your frustration into something more useful and light.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Hi Everyone, I'm 28M, IT employee, please do think from my perspective what am I about to ask. Since according to indian standards I'm already late for marriage. Now the thing is I've seen enough of failed marriages, not only in news but in own family and not everytime it was fault of the female part but I've seen good men struggling to handle themselves, few times their parents in jail. Thing is I won't be able to tolerate this kind of situation and I'm afraid of myself if I'm ever in this situation. My mother has sacrificed enough to put me through school and college and I do not wish to put her in any trouble because someone had a previous relationship which they are not able to forget or they don't like me then but get's married for the sake of it. I've never been in relationship and has been introvert throughout my life. Things that I've seen in my office and on news and at home have shaken my trust into anyone. A guy like me who use to trust anyone just because they say so is not struggling to even trust my own parents sometimes. Now please don't give me argument like not evey women is like this. I know but I just can't trust anyone and I've told this to my parents yet they insist on me being married. Everyone around me is just telling me how important it is to be married but I just can't. Since I'm only kid of my parents now my mum stopped talking to me a d I've given her my side yet she is pretty adamant on me getting married. Kindly let me know how should I proceed. Also I'm not interested even in being live in or having a girlfriend. I just don't know what to make of my life. So pretty confused, angry, frustrated and what not. Also my mother says that she'll have a thorough background check before taking things any further. I know how cute she is. She thinks everyone is as honest as her. Kindly guide me about how should I proceed since most of the people in my family is now not talking to me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
How have you managed to confuse yourself so much? You know how?
By reading into situations that have happened outside of you way too much. Yes, I will say this to you; not all women are the way you perceive.
If you got attacked by a cat, you will say...All cats are aggressive and dangerous. Is this true? Are all cats that way or just the one that you got attacked by?
In your case, you have only seen failed marriages and you have concluded as some universal truth that things will go bad and then you have gone to the extent of protecting your mother. Do you not see what rigid thinking can do? Confuse you, derail you, disillusion you...
If you wish to set things right, change the way that you are thinking of marriage, potential partners for marriage...focus on what can go right rather than on what can go wrong, will help you a lot in this.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Hi My daughter is studying in Cambridge syllabus and have chosen A levels in physics, chemistry, and biology along with economics. I would like to know the qualifying requirements for getting into Indian universities in core science and biosciences streams
Ans: Shalini Madam, Cambridge International A Levels are widely recognized by Indian universities for undergraduate admissions in core science and biosciences streams. The Association of Indian Universities (AIU) has granted equivalence to Cambridge International AS & A Levels, recognizing them as equivalent to Indian senior secondary qualifications. Eligibility criteria include subject requirements, number of A Levels, and additional considerations such as entrance exams, university-specific tests, and equivalency certificates.

Some Indian universities mandate entrance exams, such as CUET-UG for Central & State Universities, NEET for medical and related courses, and some institutions conduct their own entrance exams. Some universities may request an equivalency certificate from the AIU to validate the comparability of Cambridge qualifications to Indian standards.

To ensure eligibility, it is recommended to consult with admissions offices of targeted universities, prepare for entrance exams, and ensure all necessary documents are prepared and submitted according to university guidelines. By proactively engaging with the admissions processes and understanding specific requirements, your daughter can effectively navigate her path to securing admission in her chosen field of study in India. All the best for your Daughter's Bright Future!

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