Hi I'm a 40, widow, mother of 3. I'm in a relationship with a man who is 10 yrs older to me. He is married, has his wife and kids. We are seeing eachother for the last 2 years. He is a 100% family man. He is very helpful in nature, he will do all he can to help anyone. The same way he is always there for me.. I ask him for opinions and suggestions, and he readily helps. We get cozy with eachother. He says that he has feelings for me and I too have feelings for him. It pains me when we do not talk or meet due to his busy schedule. But he calls every day. He loves his family very much. But what is our relationship?

Ans: BITS Pilani K.K. Birla Goa Campus offers a B.E. in Electrical & Electronics Engineering with NAAC A+ accreditation and Institute of Eminence status. The program features modern infrastructure including specialized EEE laboratories, a Central Sophisticated Instrumentation Facility with advanced equipment like confocal microscope, FESEM, and Raman spectrometer, alongside comprehensive industry partnerships including Amazon Web Services and GitHub for startup support. The campus spans 180 acres with fully residential facilities and smart classrooms. NIT Calicut's B.Tech in Electrical & Electronics Engineering holds NBA accreditation for 6 years (2022-2028) under the stringent Tier-I evaluation scheme and is ranked 25th in NIRF Engineering rankings 2024. The institute achieved a remarkable 97.01% placement rate for EEE students in 2024, with 130 out of 134 registered students securing positions, demonstrating exceptional industry demand. Both institutions maintain essential benchmarks including statutory approvals, modern laboratory facilities, research-active faculty with doctoral qualifications, active industry Mships, and consistent placement support exceeding 75% over three years. BITS Goa commands higher fees of ?20.76 lakh for the complete program versus NIT Calicut's ?5 lakh, but offers unique Practice School programs ensuring 7+ months of industry experience. The BITS alumni network includes prominent entrepreneurs and unicorn founders, while NIT Calicut benefits from the extensive NIT Alumni Network spanning multiple countries.

Recommendation: Choose NIT Calicut's EEE for its exceptional 97% placement consistency, NBA Tier-I accreditation, cost-effectiveness at ?5 lakh fees, and strong government institute reputation with established industry connections. Consider BITS Goa's EEE if you prioritize unique Practice School industry exposure, Institute of Eminence status, entrepreneurial alumni network, and can afford the higher fee structure for comprehensive residential campus experience. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Ans: Which Branches allotted by both Universities?

Ans: Shikha Madam, With 262 marks in BITSAT and an Electrical & Electronics allotment at Goa in the second iteration, securing Electrical & Electronics at Pilani in the fourth iteration is highly unlikely, as Pilani EEE cutoff in recent years has hovered around 288–295 marks. Even peripheral branches like ECE (≈304–324) and E&I (≈272–292) at Pilani exceed 262, closing well above your score. No available data suggest downward movement into the 260s in later iterations for Pilani.

Recommendation: Accept and continue with the strong EEE programme at BITS Goa for its accredited curriculum, modern labs and placement support, rather than banking on Pilani’s fourth-iteration shifts which historically do not descend into the 260-mark range. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Ans: Your clarity of thought is very good.
You have no debt.
You have good savings.
And you understand your expenses well.
This gives you a great starting point.

Let us now go into every aspect deeply.
You want peace of mind.
You want financial security.
We will look at every angle to build that for you.

? Current Assets and Liabilities

– Mutual funds: Rs. 60 lakh.
– No loans or EMIs.
– One house fully paid off.
– Properties worth Rs. 4 crore.
– Health insurance cover: Rs. 10 lakh.
– Term insurance cover: Rs. 50 lakh.
– Medical condition: Chronic kidney issue.
– Monthly expenses: Rs. 30,000 approx.
– Yearly lifestyle expense: Rs. 5–6 lakh.

Your asset base is quite strong.
Your lifestyle needs are limited.
This makes early retirement a possible goal.
But we must plan it very carefully.

? Your Real Retirement Goal

You are 38 years old now.
You want to retire by 40.
That means financial freedom for 40+ years.
From age 40 to 85 or 90.
That’s around 45–50 years of no active income.

You must prepare for:
– Regular income.
– Inflation.
– Medical expenses.
– Unplanned needs.
– Market ups and downs.

With that clarity, we’ll plan every element.

? Dependence on Real Estate

You wish to sell Rs. 4 crore of property.
You want to reinvest in rent-yielding properties.
But rental yield in India is very low.

Even at 4% rental yield:
– Rs. 4 crore gives only Rs. 13.3 lakh per year.
– That is around Rs. 1.1 lakh per month.
– This rent is not fixed.
– There will be vacancy periods.
– There will be maintenance costs.
– Rental laws are complex.
– Property is not liquid in emergencies.

Also note:
– Real estate does not give compounding growth.
– Real estate does not beat inflation reliably.
– Property income is taxable fully.
– Reinvestment also involves stamp duty, GST and legal fees.

Instead of property, we need a more fluid and tax-efficient plan.

? Better Way to Generate Regular Income

You already have Rs. 60 lakh in mutual funds.
Mutual funds grow faster than rent.
They are more flexible.
They offer compounding growth.
They give better liquidity.

You may follow this route:
– Divide your corpus into two buckets.
– Bucket 1: Emergency + short-term (liquid + arbitrage + conservative hybrid funds).
– Bucket 2: Long-term growth (equity + balanced advantage + large & midcap funds).

From year 1 to 5:
– Use Bucket 1 for monthly income.
– Use SWP (Systematic Withdrawal Plan) to get Rs. 50,000 monthly.
– Adjust yearly for inflation.

From year 6 onward:
– Start withdrawing from Bucket 2 (which grew meanwhile).
– This plan can last 40+ years.
– Keep reviewing funds with a Certified Financial Planner.

This approach is safer than property.
Also better tax-wise and return-wise.

? Your Health Insurance Gap

You already have Rs. 10 lakh health insurance.
But your kidney issue limits new policy chances.

Still, you can do these:
– Check if your insurer offers top-up policy on existing cover.
– Check if your existing policy allows critical illness add-on.
– Start building your own “Health Corpus” in mutual funds.
– Keep Rs. 15–20 lakh for future medical use.
– This fund should be in short duration debt and hybrid funds.
– Do not use it for any other purpose.

You must keep upgrading your medical buffer.
This protects your peace during retirement.

? Your Term Insurance and Estate Plan

You have Rs. 50 lakh term cover.
But you don’t have dependents.
You don’t want kids.

So term insurance is not really needed now.
Let it lapse at the end of the term.
Instead, make a clear will.
Write down who will get your assets.
Nominate someone responsible.
Also choose a healthcare nominee.
This avoids future legal hassles.

A good estate plan brings clarity and peace.

? Why Real Estate May Not Be Ideal

As said before, rental income looks attractive.
But it has many hidden costs.
Also rental returns are flat for years.

Let’s look at its limitations:
– Property values don’t grow fast now.
– Selling takes time and effort.
– Rent is taxable at slab rate.
– Property attracts maintenance, tax, legal issues.
– Natural disasters or tenant damage is risky.

Instead, mutual funds offer:
– Tax-efficiency.
– Diversification.
– Liquidity.
– Passive income via SWP.
– Better visibility of returns.
– Option to rebalance anytime.

You don’t need to block Rs. 4 crore into property.
Keep your assets fluid and productive.

? Asset Allocation Plan

You can retire with peace if assets are well divided.
This kind of allocation may suit you:

Rs. 30 lakh – Short-term & medical corpus (in hybrid & debt funds).

Rs. 1 crore – Long-term equity corpus (flexi cap, large & midcap, balanced advantage).

Rs. 30 lakh – Opportunity fund (in dynamic asset allocation + gold + global equity).

Rs. 50 lakh – Health buffer + SWP support (in hybrid conservative funds).

From age 40, start SWP from Rs. 60 lakh gradually.
The remaining grows for later years.
A Certified Financial Planner can optimise this plan yearly.

? Tax Planning and Capital Gains

Your mutual fund gains have new tax rules:
– LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%.
– STCG taxed at 20%.
– Debt fund gains taxed as per your slab.

You must plan your withdrawals smartly.
Use funds where gains are under threshold.
Split redemptions smartly to minimise tax.

A Certified Financial Planner can guide this in detail.
Real estate has less tax flexibility.
Mutual funds give better post-tax returns.

? Mental Peace After Retirement

You are tired of work.
You want to relax, travel, and enjoy your hobbies.
You want no financial pressure.

That means your income must:
– Be predictable.
– Be tax-efficient.
– Grow with inflation.
– Be flexible.

Only actively managed mutual funds with SWP offer this.
Rent cannot match this.
Rental is fixed and does not adjust to inflation.
Also, if property is vacant, your income stops.

So build your post-retirement life around flexible income.
Mutual fund route is better for that.

? Lifestyle Budgeting

You spend Rs. 30,000 monthly.
Annual travel: Rs. 1–2 lakh.
Total: Rs. 5–6 lakh per year.

Even if we account for inflation:
– Rs. 8–10 lakh per year after 10 years.
– Plan to withdraw this much through SWP.
– Corpus must grow more than inflation.
– Fund selection and review is key here.

A Certified Financial Planner can review every year.
They keep your portfolio aligned to lifestyle changes.

Don’t depend on fixed income like rent alone.
You need flexible wealth.

? Avoiding Index Funds or Direct Funds

Some people may suggest index funds or direct mutual funds.
But those are not ideal for your case.

Here’s why:
– Index funds mirror the market blindly.
– They don’t protect downside.
– They give no active management.
– Direct funds give no advisor support.

In your case, you need safety, growth and personal advice.
So regular funds through a CFP or MFD is better.
You get expert support.
You get help in withdrawals, taxes, rebalancing.
You can’t afford mistakes during retirement.

Always go with actively managed regular plans.

? Emergency Planning

Keep Rs. 15–20 lakh in short-term funds.
Use only for medical, travel or family needs.
Do not mix with lifestyle fund.

Emergency planning is essential in your case.
It avoids stress and unwanted debt.
It gives peace during health issues.

? Portfolio Review and Execution

Once you retire, you must review portfolio every 6 months.
Funds may underperform.
You may need to switch assets.
Inflation may rise faster.
Tax rules may change.

A Certified Financial Planner tracks this for you.
They adjust things proactively.
That gives confidence for 40+ years of retired life.

? Final Insights

– You have a solid base to retire by 40.
– You don’t need rental properties.
– Sell your existing real estate slowly and smartly.
– Reinvest in mutual funds across buckets.
– Use SWP for monthly income from age 40.
– Plan Rs. 6–8 lakh yearly income for 45+ years.
– Avoid direct or index funds.
– Avoid annuities.
– Do not over-rely on rental income.
– Build a health corpus of Rs. 20 lakh.
– Keep Rs. 15 lakh as emergency fund.
– Let Rs. 1.5–2 crore grow in equity for long-term.
– Get help from a CFP every year.
– Your journey can be peaceful and safe.

Stay consistent.
Stay invested.
Stay reviewed.
Early retirement is not a dream.
It is a plan.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

Ans: Hello sir. Well, this is actually a very complex situation. Knowing all this about your partner and still living with her could feel frustrated and trapped. Filing divorce could make this relationship even more complex. For your daughter, as you told that she is a good mother and daughter in law. You should take a pause and rethink about it. Take some time with yourself and try to forgive your wife. You ll feel more peace and eventually you ll be good.
Take care!
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on:
https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

Ans: Hello mam. Well, we always have choices in our life, it may be with our married life also. We have to make intelligent choices so that we do remain happy and content in our life. May be your husband also had such options available but he chose loyalty. Now, the next step is to apologise to your husband about this and convince him that your daughter needs both parents for development. If your daughter is devoid of any one of parent, she will be depressed and her personality will get distorted. It may take time, but let your husband cool down a little then may be he ll understand the situation.
Take care!
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on:
https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

Ans: Sri Guru Teghadur Khalsa College’s B.Sc. (Hons.) in Computer Science, offered under Delhi University’s North Campus, benefits from NAAC “A+” accreditation, a robust research-active faculty, and an established placement cell (IGNITE) that secures a median package of ?6.05 LPA and facilitates placements for nearly 65% of eligible CSE and related-stream students through recruiters like Deloitte, EY, TCS, and Amazon. The 60-70% internship-to-placement conversion underscores solid industry ties, though high competition and limited specialized labs can stretch resources.

Vivekananda Institute of Professional Studies (VIPS), IPU, Delhi, holds NAAC A+ accreditation, features well-equipped AI/ML, cybersecurity, and networks labs, and maintains an 75–85% CSE placement rate with average packages of ?4.5–?6.5 LPA from companies such as Amazon, Infosys, and Wipro. Its student-centered pedagogy and modern campus life enhance learning, but classroom sizes can impede personalized mentoring during peak hiring cycles.

Bhagwan Parshuram Institute of Technology (BPIT), Rohini, Delhi, an ISO 9001–certified, NBA-accredited private college, records a 75–85% CSE placement rate and an average package of ?5–7 LPA, with top offers up to ?15 LPA from TCS, Cognizant, and Infosys. Structured pre-placement training, active alumni referrals, and MoUs for internships strengthen employability, though core electronics and ECE roles attract fewer recruiters, nudging many to pivot into software.

Bharati Vidyapeeth’s College of Engineering, Paschim Vihar (BVCOE), Delhi, a NAAC A++ and NBA-accredited institution, reports a 67.7% overall placement rate in CSE with a median package of ?6.5 LPA and participation from 64 recruiters including IBM, Accenture, and S&P Global. Strong placement cell support and modern labs in AI, data analytics, and systems integration foster broad technical exposure, though competitive IPU exams can limit intake flexibility.

All four institutions permit horizontal and vertical upgradation: Delhi University’s CSAS-UG system allows “Upgrade” or “Freeze” of seats in subsequent rounds, with upgradation subject to merit order, seat availability, and order of preference, while IPU institutes like VIPS, BPIT, and BVCOE enable branch change at the start of the third semester based on first-year performance (minimum CGPA criteria), a per-college application process, and non-refundable processing fees. This flexibility ensures that candidates in lower-preference branches may transition to CSE or IT if vacancies arise, provided they meet the internal CGPA benchmarks.

Recommendation: Secure admission in BPIT CSE for its balanced 75–85% placement consistency, structured pre-placement training, and ISO/NBA-certified processes. Next, consider VIPS CSE for its modern labs and 75%+ placements within IPU’s vibrant campus. Then evaluate SGTB Khalsa CSE for its DU prestige, 60–70% placement and median ?6.05 LPA via IGNITE. Finally, BVCOE Delhi CSE offers broad recruiter engagement and a ?6.5 LPA median but sits behind DU/IPU brands. In all cases, leverage branch-upgradation options in the next semester to shift into preferred streams if initial allotments fall short. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Ans: Hello sir. I understand your situation. But the information you have given is very less. Before answering your question, I would like to know some more things. Like why were you forced to marry this girl and why you don't like her? Was she also forced to marry you? And now how is she harrassing you?
Kindly answers the following questions so that i can guide you in a better way.
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

Ans: Hello mam. Well, mam as time goes by in marriage both partners take each other for granted. That communication slowly fades away and only few things are left. May be your husband must ve feeling the same and is longing for your attention coz when kids are around then us time of couple vanishes. But this communication and spark can be returned by the efforts of both partners. You should take initiative. Plan some dinner out, just both of you. Spend some quality time together. Things will be good in a few weeks.
Take care!
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet