Dear Roopashree,
I have an anger management problem.
When I get angry, I have no control over what I say or do and I end up hurting the people I love (not physically, but because of what I say).
This is bad for me at work as well. Though I am good at my job, my temper is my downside.
How do I control my anger? Dietwise, is there something I can do? Is there anything I can do that does not involve medication?
AR

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Possible reasons for getting upset, angry, sad, disappointed:
1. Having unrealistic expectations from oneself and/or others
2. Juggling home and office front
3. Unable to spend much time with the children
4. Unable to connect with family/spouse
5. Lack of time to spend with your social circle
6. Lack of Me-Time
7. Health challenges/issues

#7 will require you to visit your GP and check a few vital parameters to make sure that all is well with your physical health. The others, you will need to do a reality check to assess where the triggers lie that make you feel angry over little things. You do know that it's possible to work on it and few light over these little things, don't you?

All the best!

Ans: First, I want to acknowledge your remarkable self-awareness and the wonderful life you’ve built. You’ve achieved a great balance professionally, financially, and personally, and you have a beautiful, supportive family. It’s fantastic that you’re committed to continuing to grow and improve for yourself and your loved ones.

Managing emotions, especially strong ones, is an essential skill that can benefit every aspect of your life. To start, it's important to understand what triggers your intense emotional reactions. Keeping a journal can be incredibly helpful. Write down when you feel extremely happy or angry, and note the events leading up to those emotions. This process will help you recognize patterns and triggers.

Mindfulness and meditation are powerful tools for managing emotions. These practices help you stay present and reduce the intensity of emotional responses. You might find guided meditation apps like Headspace or Calm useful as they can provide structure and consistency. Try dedicating a few minutes each day to these practices, and you’ll likely notice a calming effect on your mind and body.

When it comes to regulating emotions, specific techniques can be very effective. Cognitive reframing, for instance, involves challenging and changing unhelpful thoughts that lead to extreme emotions. Grounding exercises, such as focusing on what you can see, hear, and touch, can bring you back to the present moment and reduce emotional overwhelm. Taking a moment to pause and reflect before reacting can also make a significant difference.

Developing empathy is another crucial step. Try to understand others' perspectives more deeply. This can diminish negative emotions and biases, leading to better communication and stronger relationships. When you feel your emotions rising, practice expressing them calmly and constructively. Use "I" statements to convey your feelings without placing blame, such as "I feel upset when...".

If you find that managing these emotions on your own is challenging, seeking professional help is a wise decision. A therapist or counselor can provide personalized strategies and support. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), in particular, is effective for managing emotions and developing healthier thinking patterns.

Incorporating regular physical activity into your routine can also help regulate your emotions. Exercise reduces stress and boosts overall well-being. Whether it’s yoga, running, or even a daily walk, physical activity can make a substantial difference.


Practicing gratitude can shift your mindset from negative to positive. Consider keeping a gratitude journal and writing down a few things you’re thankful for each day. This simple practice can have a profound impact on your outlook and emotional health.



Remember, improvement takes time and effort. Start small, gradually incorporating these practices into your daily routine, and celebrate your progress along the way. By working on these areas, you'll not only improve your emotional regulation but also enhance your overall quality of life and strengthen your relationships with your family and colleagues.

You’re on a great path, and your commitment to growth is truly admirable. Keep pushing forward, and you'll continue to thrive both personally and professionally.