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Anu

Anu Krishna  |789 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 16, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
SAIBAL Question by SAIBAL on Dec 04, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Off late i mate ex flame of mind. Due to some reason or other, we did not get married. Both of us have abusive partners. We are suffering a lot in our respective marriages. Shall we continue our friendship? We find lot of peace in talking with each other.

Ans: Dear Saibal,
Obviously after meeting after ages, the spark will be rekindled and your existing lives with your spouses are not going to look any great.
Ask yourself:
What will I risk by indulging into a connection outside of marriage?
How much of a connection do I want to have with my ex-flame?
Will I be able to keep to only a friendship?
Will my ex-flame also be able to draw the line where and when necessary?
Are we both going to be able to be mature about this and strictly maintain a connection that is healthy?

Also, it's okay to find peace by talking to one another; but don't get dependent on it. Find a way to seek that within relationships that are for keeps...otherwise, the focus will shift to maintaining the relationship outside of marriage and there will be less attention on the marriage. Then sooner than later, you will both find your marriage even more dull and boring.
I do not understand what you mean by 'abusive' partners as you have not provided enough data for me on this to use in my response to you...
Also, I am unaware if there are children involved in this equation on both sides...If YES, tread carefully as you do not want to be rocking the boat on that one...Children getting impacted at whatever age can be very tedious on them!

Bottom line: if both of you are mature about this friendship and not use each other as emotional crutches, then you know you are in the right place. Growing in any relationship and providing the space for the other to grow is a pillar that you should work on. Now you know, what you are looking at, right?

All the best!

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Anu Krishna  |789 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 11, 2022

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Hi Anu, I am a married 27 yr old girl pursuing my medical PG degree in a college and my husband is also fellow doctor residing in another city. I stay in a hostel and I was in a relationship with a guy during my UG days. Actually he used to be my best friend. We are a gang of 4 and no one knows about my relationship except us both. We moved on due to caste issues and foreseeing the problems after marriage in our families. We are in touch with each other. He got PG degree in my college and seeing him is haunting my memories though we talk casually and not on regular basis. My husband knows about us and asked me to avoid him. But I can't give up on my friendship. Can a friendship aged in love not be reverted to friendship?
Ans:

Dear DR,

Feelings aren’t something that can be set aside that easily.

To lead a different relationship than the one that you were in with the same person requires a lot of emotional maturity from both of you to make this real and honest.

If you look at it from the point of view of your husband, he might either be insecure about this, or he can foresee a situation up ahead which might not be very pleasant.

You have mentioned that seeing him is bringing back memories.

Are you really ready to maintain a friendship without the feelings coming in the way? Are you ready to manage what this might do to your husband?

If you are ready and be objective about all of this, then first sit your husband down and talk to him and his fears.

Reassure him but like any relationship, all this requires a lot of work and then it’s also time to ask yourself, is this all worth it and do I really need to do this?

Also, is the other person from your past, also willing to understand that this requires him to put your marriage above his needs?

So, check with yourself what and how much you can handle and whether you are ready for this new challenge?

Best wishes!

(more)
Anu

Anu Krishna  |789 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 11, 2022

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Relationship
Hi Anu, I am a married 27 yr old girl pursuing my medical PG degree in a college and my husband is also fellow doctor residing in another city. I stay in a hostel and I was in a relationship with a guy during my UG days. Actually he used to be my best friend. We are a gang of 4 and no one knows about my relationship except us both. We moved on due to caste issues and foreseeing the problems after marriage in our families. We are in touch with each other. He got PG degree in my college and seeing him is haunting my memories though we talk casually and not on regular basis. My husband knows about us and asked me to avoid him. But I can't give up on my friendship. Can a friendship aged in love not be reverted to friendship?
Ans:

Dear DR,

Feelings aren’t something that can be set aside that easily.

To lead a different relationship than the one that you were in with the same person requires a lot of emotional maturity from both of you to make this real and honest.

If you look at it from the point of view of your husband, he might either be insecure about this, or he can foresee a situation up ahead which might not be very pleasant.

You have mentioned that seeing him is bringing back memories.

Are you really ready to maintain a friendship without the feelings coming in the way? Are you ready to manage what this might do to your husband?

If you are ready and be objective about all of this, then first sit your husband down and talk to him and his fears.

Reassure him but like any relationship, all this requires a lot of work and then it’s also time to ask yourself, is this all worth it and do I really need to do this?

Also, is the other person from your past, also willing to understand that this requires him to put your marriage above his needs?

So, check with yourself what and how much you can handle and whether you are ready for this new challenge?

Best wishes!

(more)
Anu

Anu Krishna  |789 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 14, 2022

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Relationship
Dear Madam I had a relationship with my childhood friend until last year. We both got married to different people. Due to some misunderstanding, he is not talking to me right now. I tried to contact him through social media but there has been no response from his side. My intention is to continue with our friendship. His thoughts are torturing me badly and I am suffering with depression these days. I am trying to get out of this. But I'm unable to do so. Help me out, what should I do now?
Ans:

Dear LM,

There is a reason for him ‘ghosting’ you.

Was your ‘relationship’ one sided?

Was he clear that he was not in any sort of commitment with you?

Did you at any point think that this might be a long haul one?

Sometimes, people believe relationships are meant to last forever.

Nice fairy tales they fool themselves with and then build expectations up and then drive into a well of foolish decisions only to realise that they have led themselves to self-pity to play a victim.

This is what you are doing to yourself.

Rise above and know that he isn’t interested anymore. Who are you crying over? Who are you waiting for? And is he worth spoiling your state of mind?

Start by de-focusing…

  • Put away all stuff that holds his memories
  • Be with your friends who can support you
  • Eat and sleep well and on time
  • Pick up a new hobby or learn a new language to divert the attention

And you don’t have depression unless clinically diagnosed.

You are just feeling low and sad, and it will slowly fade away. Have faith but take the first step to make yourself feel better.

All the best!

(more)
Anu

Anu Krishna  |789 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 08, 2022

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Relationship
Dear Madam I had a relationship with my childhood friend till last year. We both got married to different people. Due to some misunderstanding he is not talking to me right now. I tried lot from my end to contact him through social media but no response from his side. My intention is why can’t we be friends at least now. His thoughts are torturing me badly and I am suffering with depression now a days. I am trying to get out of this, but I'm unable to do so. Help me out, what should I do now.Pls reply through email only. It should be confidential.
Ans:

Dear LM,

Things have moved for him, and he has clearly decided to move on.

Why choose to pine so much? If it is some misunderstanding, give him time to sort it in his mind and get back to you.

Trying and not getting the expected result will cause you more pain and anguish over the fact that he is not responding because of this and that.

Your mind will search for all reasons to justify your pain and the action that you have taken to reach out to him.

Give this a break. Respect his decision as hard as it maybe for you, but if he somewhere in the future decides to be a friend, let him approach you.

The more you are chasing him, the more it is hitting your self-esteem with the rejection and soon it will start to make you feel bitter. So, Pause and take that break.

And to defocus on this, make sure you spend more time with your existing set of friends, go deeper into work (if you are a working professional), spend more time with your family, develop new hobbies and more…

What all this does is, give the mind an alternate path to focus on…slowly, the pain starts to ease as your focus on him eases…and this is possible only if you willfully choose to ease the pain for yourself.

Your life, your choice…so, be kind on yourself and choose what’s best for your mind and you.

Best wishes!

(more)
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Shekhar

Shekhar Kumar  |17 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership, HR Expert - Answered on Apr 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 14, 2024Hindi
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Eventhough you are ready to Grab the oppurtunity and behave in flexible manner When you are not working currwntly it becomes nightmare to join a job once again HR dept, Interview panel Sr Mgmt dont look for Solutions to their Requirements posted online whether it is Naukri or Indeed or Linkedin Getting selected but not finalising Putting Selected candidates on hold for 2 to 3 / Even 3 to 6 months shows worst economy In india especially post covid scenario Not able to recover in career to bring myself back on track after innumerable attempts Location constraints Language constraints Relavang exp / Relavant ind constraints Age constraints Slow Decision making from Corp Mgmt and BUSINESS HEAD / MD / CEO Facing rejection with cool attitude
Ans: Thank you for sharing it to me. It sounds like you're facing a challenging situation, and I understand how frustrating it can be to navigate the job market, especially in the current economic climate. Here are some insights and strategies to help you cope with these challenges:

Despite facing setbacks and rejections, it's essential to remain persistent and resilient in your job search. Keep applying to relevant positions, refining your resume and cover letter, and reach out your professionals network in your industry and consider broadening your job search criteria to include a wider range of industries, roles, and locations to help yourself. Invest your time in continuous learning and skill development to enhance your qualifications and make yourself more competitive in the job market by pursuing certifications, online courses, or workshops relevant to your field to stay updated with industry trends and requirements. Try to attend industry events, join professional associations, and leverage online networking platforms like LinkedIn to expand your professional network and access potential job leads. Despite the challenges you're facing, try to maintain a positive mindset and focus on the aspects of your job search that you can control. Keep practicing self-care, stay motivated, and celebrate small victories along the way to stay resilient in the face of adversity.

Always remember that setbacks and challenges are a natural part of the growth process, and it's essential to persevere and adapt your approach based on your experiences. Stay proactive, keep learning and searching better jobs, and trust that your efforts will eventually lead to success. Best of luck! Feel free to contact me on Rediff Gurus if you need further assistance or help.
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Sir, I am 27 year old. Single . Working in a psu as a manager. I hate my job. I am not that great at study. I really want to earn a lot of money, travel and retire at the age of 45-50. But I don’t know how ? Should I do mba ? At this age ? I am middle class ! UPSC ? Learn coding? Stop dreaming?
Ans: It's reasonable to feel dissatisfied with your current job and to aspire for more. Considering your age, career stage, and goals, here are some considerations and potential paths you could explore:

Pursuing an MBA can be a valuable option if you're seeking to advance your career, switch industries, or develop managerial and business skills. Many MBA programs welcome candidates from diverse backgrounds, including those with experience in public sector organizations. If you're interested in a career in civil services and have a passion for public administration, policy-making, and governance, preparing for the UPSC exam could be a viable option. Keep in mind that UPSC preparation requires dedication, perseverance, and thorough understanding of current affairs and the Indian administrative system. Learning coding and acquiring technical skills can open up opportunities in the rapidly growing field of technology as well. If you have innovative ideas and a strong desire to create your own path, entrepreneurship could be worth exploring. Starting your own business or venture allows you to pursue your passions, take control of your career, and potentially achieve financial independence. However, entrepreneurship also involves risks and uncertainties, so it's crucial to conduct thorough market research, develop a solid business plan, and be prepared for challenges along the way. Regardless of your career path, prioritizing financial planning and investments can help you work towards your goal of retiring early. Consider consulting with a financial advisor to create a personalized financial plan, explore investment opportunities, and establish a savings strategy that aligns with your income, expenses, and retirement goals. Finally, focus on personal development and self-discovery to clarify your values, interests, and priorities. Reflect on what truly motivates and fulfills you, and explore ways to incorporate those elements into your career and lifestyle choices.

Ultimately, there's no one-size-fits-all answer, and the best path for you will depend on your unique circumstances, strengths, and aspirations. Take the time to explore your options, gather information, and make informed decisions that align with your goals and aspirations. Remember that it's never too late to pursue your dreams and create the life you desire. Best of Luck! Feel free to contact me on Rediff Gurus if you need further assistance or help.
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Shekhar Kumar  |17 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership, HR Expert - Answered on Apr 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 12, 2024Hindi
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I have recently completed my Masters in Zoology; specialisation in Cell Biology & Cytogenetics. Also, I hold a degree of Bachelor in Science as well as Bachelor in Education. Right now, I'm in that stage of life where you see a lot of options in your career; though confused which one to pursue as in the developing scenario, I want something that gives good money as well as requires my knowledge. Need experts advice.
Ans: Given your educational background and specialization in Cell Biology & Cytogenetics, as well as your dual degree in Science and Education, you have a diverse range of career options to explore. Here are some potential career paths that align with your qualifications and interests:

You can pursue a career as a research scientist in academic institutions, government agencies, or private research organizations, work in the biotechnology industry in roles such as research associate, laboratory technician, or quality control specialist or work as a clinical laboratory scientist or medical technologist in hospitals, diagnostic laboratories, or healthcare facilities or work as genetic counselor to assess risk of inherited genetic disorders and provide information and support regarding genetic testing, diagnosis, and treatment options, or work as biology teacher, college lecturer, or educational consultant or work as a science writer or editor, writing articles, blogs, or educational materials on topics related to cell biology, genetics, and cytogenetics or work as a regulatory affairs specialist, ensuring compliance with regulatory requirements and guidelines for the development and approval of drugs, biologics, and medical devices.

Consider your interests, career goals, and desired work environment when exploring these options. You may also benefit from networking with professionals in your field, seeking informational interviews, or gaining hands-on experience through internships or volunteer opportunities to help you make an informed decision about your career path. Feel free to contact me on Rediff Gurus if you need further help or assistance.
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Shekhar Kumar  |17 Answers  |Ask -

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Hallo Sir, Myself Sanjay Agarwal. My daughter pursued her M.Sc. (physics) from Delhi University in 2010–11. But could not clear it and got back papers in two subjects. She joined the service as a teacher (TGT) in a reputed 10+2 school and, after that, got married. As she is also teaching the 11 and 12 standards (supposed to be taught by PGT) and the results of her students are extremely good, now she wants to complete her PG in Physics so that she may be allotted the class as PGT. Her school is also suggesting this to her, and they are ready to provide the necessary permissions for that. Please suggest that after 10–12 years of back papers in DU, is it possible to clear those back papers now? Or may you suggest alternatives so that she may complete her M.Sc. in Physics?
Ans: Thank you for getting in touch with me on Rediff Gurus. It's commendable that your daughter is considering furthering her education to advance her career. While clearing back papers after a significant gap may pose challenges, it's not impossible. She should reach out to the concerned department or administrative office at Delhi University to inquire about their policies and procedures for clearing back papers after a long gap. They can provide guidance on the possibility and process involved. If clearing the back papers is possible, she can start preparing for the exams by going through her study materials, seeking guidance from professors, and practicing past exam papers. She can also consider private universities and institutions as an alternative which are offering PG courses in Physics that may have more flexible admission and examination policies, if clearing back papers at Delhi University seems challenging. Kindly encourage your daughter to assess these options carefully, with determination and perseverance to achieve her educational and professional aspirations. Feel free to contact me on Rediff Gurus if you need further assistance or help.
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Shekhar Kumar  |17 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership, HR Expert - Answered on Apr 13, 2024

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Hii, I am BCA passout student in year 2021, and currently I am pursuing LLB degree so at that time I am still confused to choose a career, so plz tell me what are the pros and cons of both degree and which degree makes money earlier and great future provide to me
Ans: Thank you for getting in touch with me. Choosing between a Bachelor of Computer Applications (BCA) and a Bachelor of Laws (LLB) degree can be a significant decision that depends on various factors including your interests, skills, career goals, and personal preferences. Here are some pros and cons of both degrees to help you make an informed decision:

Pros of BCA: Lucrative Job Opportunities, High Demand and Competitive Salaries,
Cons of BCA: Rapid Technological Changes, Job Competition and Work-Life Balance
Pros of LLB: Prestigious Career, Diverse Practice Areas, Stable Income, Advocacy and Social Impact
Cons of LLB: Lengthy Education and Training, High Competition, Work-Life Balance

When considering which degree may provide better financial prospects and a great future, it's essential to weigh your interests, strengths, career goals, and personal preferences. Both BCA and LLB offer promising career paths with opportunities for growth, success, and fulfillment, but the right choice ultimately depends on your individual aspirations and aspirations. Additionally, exploring potential career paths, networking with professionals in each field, and mentors can help you make an informed decision that aligns with your long-term goals and aspirations. Good luck! Feel free to contact me on Rediff Gurus if you need further help or assistance.
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Shekhar Kumar  |17 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership, HR Expert - Answered on Apr 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 29, 2023Hindi
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How to apply for internship in Rosell techsys pvt ltd
Ans: Happy to hear from you! To apply for an internship at Rosell Techsys, you can follow these instructions mentioned below:

First visit the official website of Rosell Techsys Pvt Ltd. You can also search for any internship openings on job portals as well such as Freshersworld, Shine, Indeed, Naukri.com or LinkedIn. Then look for internship opportunities that match your skills, interests, and career goals by paying attention to the job descriptions, requirements, and application deadlines mentioned on the website. Prepare your resume/CV highlighting your relevant skills, qualifications, academic achievements, and any previous internship or work experience and write a compelling cover letter expressing your interest in the internship position and explaining why you are a suitable candidate. You should customize your cover letter for each application to make it more personalized and impactful then submit your application through the company's official website or the job portal where the internship opening is posted. Please follow the application instructions carefully and ensure that you attach all required documents, such as your resume/CV and cover letter. After submitting your application, be patient and wait for a response from Rosell Techsys. If your application is shortlisted, you may be contacted for further rounds of interviews or assessments. Prepare for interviews by researching the company, understanding its products/services, and familiarizing yourself with the internship role and responsibilities. Be confident, articulate, and enthusiastic during the interview process. If you are selected for the internship, review the terms and conditions of the internship offer carefully, including the duration, stipend (if any), and expectations and respond to the offer promptly and confirm your acceptance of the internship position.

By following these instructions and presenting yourself as a qualified candidate, you can increase your chances of securing an internship opportunity at Rosell Techsys Pvt Ltd. Good luck! Feel free to contact me on Rediff Gurus if you need further guidance or assistance.
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