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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1651 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 26, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 23, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Dear Ma'am , Please keep my identity confidential. I am facing a very unique problem, I am happily married man for last 18 years with 2 children, before my current marriage in 2003 my Marriage was fixed with a girl ( I was based out of Singapore at That time, I work in management position in one of top IT companies now in India) who was a very distant relative ( her Bhabhi and my Bhabhi were cousins). for some health reason at that time I backed out of from that marriage and when I was better we proposed marriage to her again but then she was already engaged. later I got married to my wife and she too has got married ( I am not in touch with her not knows anything about her husband and never tried to find out. even though I know that my elder brother and her elder cousin have become good friend and I stayed in far off city from them. problem started for me in September 2023, out of no where I started getting bad creams about her. once I found here ( in dream) at nreaby place where she was in bad shape and i brought here home. my dream ended there that night. after that regularly started getting some dreams or other almost every early morning. as it was going to an arranged marriage i had never spoken to here , not a single word. but since then dreams have not stopped some time negative and sometime positive like we are enjoying life together. one of psychologist suggested me to fins out about here current status just to validate that she is all fine in here life but I could not as no one from my family supported the idea of getting touch with as I have no details of her except she is married and working as Teacher ( she is M.Sc. B.ED) . Please guide me if there is normal and what can I do as these dream are not stopping and I am getting so involved that I am unable to forget her, Please guide.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Dreams can just play out like a movie on what bothers you or what you are fearful of or even things that you feel happy about. Certain experts also suggest that dreams can help in resolving underlying issues.
Whatever it is, do remember what you said: I am happily married man for last 18 years with 2 children.
The past better be where it must be. To go into what the other lady is doing and knowing her current status is only going to get you more entangled into her life. Do you really want this entanglement? Do you really wish to be a part of a situation where you spend mind cycles to figure out if all is okay with her and in the bargain disturb the peace in your life? I am sure you know what the answers are.
Find solace in the fact that she must have people who care for her and who love her. This will to a large extent keep you from looping into her life even at a subconscious level. And also start to be more involved within your family...this will keep you engaged and also give you an assurance that you are in the right place with the right people meant for you.
The mind does what it is directed to do; so direct it toward actions that support your growth and peace of mind.

All the best!

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |619 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 07, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
I was in love with a girl, far from my place in South. She is from Rajasthan. She too liked me a lot and we were in touch through phone. Me a Hindu and she a Jain. Whenever I would tell I want to marry her, she would say get my dad married (her dad was a widower). Later I met her once when her family had come for Bangalore visit. She even took me to her relative's house and introduced her elder sister. We continued to be in touch. Few years later her sister was to be married and she invited me. I went to Jodhpur, stayed with their family during the wedding (in a separate room they had booked). Probably I got exposed to their family. I wanted to again propose to her. But through her family friends, fact that I was interested in her got to be known to her father and other family members. As per what I got to know, they even discussed our wedding but felt age gap was much (8 years). She stopped being in touch and her phone was not reachable. When I could get in touch, she told me the reason why their family disagreed. Now I am married to someone else and heard she is also settled. Problem is, I still get her dreams. Every girl I see, I relate to her. She is not out of my mind. Of course there is love deep within, but I dont know why I end up dreaming about her. How do I avoid this? She's gone into past and even now she's blocked my number or linkedin, yet I am unable to stop thinking or worse, dreaming. How do I stop this?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry to hear that you are in such a situation but dwelling on the past can hinder your present and future happiness. It's natural to reminisce about past relationships, but if these thoughts consume your waking hours and your dreams, it's crucial to refocus your energy. You have a loving wife who deserves your attention and efforts in building a better marriage. Instead of fixating on a relationship that didn't work out, invest your time and emotions in nurturing your marriage.

As humans, we want what we cannot have the most, more than what we have. I believe you are facing the same. But it's essential to accept that your ex has moved on, as evidenced by her decision to block you and so should you.

About your recurring dreams- if you are occupied with a certain thought the entire day, it is only normal that your dreams will reflect the same. Shift your focus to other things to break this pattern. And the more you obsess about it, the more you try to find meaning in some random dreams, the worse your situation will get. Talking about your feelings with a trusted friend can also dilute the matter and alleviate the burden. Remember, the past is behind you, and your present actions determine your future happiness.

Best Wishes!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1651 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 07, 2023

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Hai i am 58 and retired my wife expired 30 months back i had two daughters who are working and yet to be married. very frequently these days i get dreams where i feel i am lost on my journey to somewhere or i am simply attending an office without any proper work or in my dreams i get one of my uncle (who is no more now passed away 7 years back )and his family members with whom i stayed during my studies for six years 40 years back. can you please analyse
Ans: Dear P,
I am truly sorry for your loss...

I am not a dreams analyst or someone who interprets dreams. I can only make a few guesses from what you have shared and suggest something that will guide you to be more positive and happier.
Dreams are a manifestation of deep desires, fears, dark memories, happier memories...dreams basically can indicate what lies deep within the subconscious mind. It's possible from what you share that 'LOSING' your wife has triggered many more situations where you had lost someone or you fear that you might lose someone or something. Maybe that explains the dream of you going to office without paper work...

Losing someone dear is a very difficult journey and it can show up in different ways. The only way can process grief is through time and an understanding that nothing is permanent in life. It's a momentum of give and take, having and losing...Maybe if you are able to consciously adapt and accept this, over time your subconscious mind starts to change and adapt as well. Again, I will reiterate: You certainly will still miss the person and feel sad; it's just that you will start to miss differently as the acceptance will allow you to graciously be in a space of understanding. Difficult BUT Possible!
Also, practice the Art of Gratitude. Being thankful for every little thing, lets you be in a positive space allowing you to be at peace more often.

These are only suggestions from what I could gather from the information that you have shared and not an analysis or interpretation of your dreams.

All the best!

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |619 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 05, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello Ma'am, hope you're doing good. My problem is that something happened with me and I have started questioning my marriage. I and my wife are married 12 years ago after a lot of struggle as her parents were not ready because of our different caste and religion. Later we got married with their blessings. she is a very nice woman. After marriage, my business started going well and we're financially very well. We live with my parents and our two kids. Everything was going fine (obviously we do fight) until I met my business partner's sister who is a divorcee and I didn't know how but I started feeling attraction towards her. Recently, I dreamt of cheating on my wife with her. Since I am not able to hold proper eye contact with my wife and even I have started questioning my love for my wife. Has it ended ? I am very tensed since then.
Ans: It's normal to feel conflicted and unsure when you start experiencing attraction towards someone outside of your marriage. However, it's important to remember that attraction alone doesn't necessarily mean that your love for your wife has ended.

Before jumping to conclusions or making any drastic decisions, it might be helpful to take some time to reflect on your feelings and the reasons behind them. Ask yourself questions like: What specifically attracted me to this other person? Are there any underlying issues in my marriage that might be contributing to these feelings? Am I feeling unfulfilled or disconnected from my wife in any way?

It could also be beneficial to have open and honest communication with your wife about what you're going through. Sharing your feelings with her, even if they're difficult, can help strengthen your bond and provide clarity for both of you. Remember to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding, and be prepared to listen to her perspective as well.

Seeking support from a therapist or counselor can also be incredibly helpful in navigating these complex emotions and making decisions that are best for you and your family. They can provide you with guidance, perspective, and strategies for coping with your feelings in a healthy way.

Ultimately, it's important to prioritize honesty, communication, and empathy in your relationship, and to take the time to explore your feelings and needs before making any decisions about your marriage.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1651 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 03, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello madam I a 32 year old married man with a kid , who is 6 years old. I have done arrange marriage with my own decision I agreed to my parents for the marrige at that time I was in a casual relationship with a girl I didn't said anything to the girl and get married to someone else. After that I tried to live a happay life with my wife without thinking about the girl whom I left behind, from outside I tried to be happy with my wife but my wife thought doesn't matches with me so I felt so disturbed from inside. Still I was trying to continue the relationship for sake of our child but suddenly I got my ex love contact and I was so happy that after so long time I got a chance to talk to her, I have tried to meet her but she always refused to meet me because she was in a relationship. I tried many times and due to some misconduct I again lost her for the second time. At this moment when she is not with me her thoughts memories are troubling me so much I am in pain, what am I suppose to do to get rid of the pain?? Please help
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There is no point wanting a 'past' relationship just because you have one...what if that relationship did not exist, you would have possibly made efforts to make your marriage work, right?
Then do just that...DO NOT treat your marriage as an option...which marriage is a perfect one? And are all spouses tailor-made to fit one another?
So, if her thoughts don't match with yours, then even yours don't match with hers...so, should she also think of jumping into some other relationship. Please act mature about this especially with a child in the entire equation; try and understand each other...speak about your differences and find ways of working on them by accepting them. Ex-love etc looks all very nice, but come down to ground reality; please...work on your marriage!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9162 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 20, 2025Hindi
Career
Hi, my son has secured an admission in a 2+2 BITS CSE program 2025 at Hyderabad (first 2 years) and Iowa state univ (for next 2 years). Under DASA he can potentially get AI at NITK or ECE at NIT Trichy or CSE in NITW (his CRL rank is 25200). Can you please advise and provide recommendations on what we can choose and reasons? We know 2+2 ISU program is more expensive compared to NIT DASA fees but is it worth the money vis-a-vis doing a B.Tech at NIT and doing a masters in US later? For this rank, what can he get at the said NITs under DASA?
Ans: The BITS Pilani–Iowa State University 2+2 CSE offers two years at BITS Hyderabad (ACM-aligned curriculum, NAAC A++ accreditation, state-of-the-art AI, data-science and cloud labs) followed by two years at Iowa State University (top-50 US engineering program, immersive B.S. in Computer Engineering, ISU merit scholarships up to US $4,500/year). Total direct tuition and campus fees for BITS Hyderabad amount to approximately ?10.5 L per year, while Iowa State tuition exceeds US $33,000 annually, plus living expenses. Graduates earn dual degrees with global brand recognition and typically secure near-100% placement through BITS’s 200+ recruiter network and ISU’s strong career services, commanding premium compensation packages in software, data science and R&D roles.

Under DASA with an All-India CRL of 25,200, he qualifies for: B.Tech AI at NIT Surathkal (AI cutoff: 26,688); B.Tech ECE at NIT Trichy (ECE cutoff: 66,706); and B.Tech CSE at NIT Warangal (CSE cutoff: 46,935). Each NIT features NBA accreditation, experienced PhD faculty, modern labs and strong industry MoUs. NITK AI and NITW CSE boast placement rates above 80% and growing AI/analytics recruitment pipelines, while NIT Trichy ECE records near-75% core-sector placements. Annual DASA fees at NITs range from US $15,000–18,000, significantly lower than BITS-ISU costs, with comparable scholarship opportunities limited.

Balancing long-term ROI, the BITS 2+2 path accelerates global exposure, dual-degree credentials and premium placements at higher upfront cost. A B.Tech at NIT followed by a US master’s entails lower initial investment, robust core engineering training and the flexibility to self-fund graduate studies through campus placements or scholarships.

Recommendation: Opt for BITS 2+2 CSE if you prioritise world-class international exposure, dual degrees and, top-tier placement networks despite higher fees. Choose a DASA seat at NIT (AI at NITK or CSE at NITW) for cost-effective core engineering training with solid placement and later pursue a US master’s via merit scholarships. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9162 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 20, 2025

Career
Best option in iiit hyderabad for better placement and early internship in btech and dual degree for course cse with speclization ai ml
Ans: Dipanshu, IIIT Hyderabad’s B.Tech in CSE offers an ACM-aligned curriculum covering algorithms, systems, AI/ML, data science and electives in computer vision and NLP, delivered through state-of-the-art AI, cloud-computing and robotics labs. A 12-credit Practice School internship begins in the fifth semester, supported by a proactive placement cell and corporate mentoring, yielding a 99% placement rate for BTech CSE with an average package of ?31.98 LPA over the past three years. Faculty include PhD-qualified researchers with strong industry collaborations, and accredited NAAC A++ status underpins academic quality. The five-year dual-degree integrates the BTech foundation with a research-oriented MS by Research, immersing students in advanced AI/ML theory, thesis work under DST/CSIR grants, and early research assistantships via centres like Kohli Center on Intelligent Systems. Dual-degree cohorts see 100% MS placement at an average of ?26.46 LPA, and graduates often secure RA internships and stipends of ?20,000–?50,000 monthly through lab-based projects. Both paths benefit from IIIT-H’s industry MoUs, interdisciplinary innovation hubs and global recruiter network, yet differ in academic depth, time-to-degree and placement profiles.

Recommendation: Opt for the BTech CSE for its higher average placement packages, structured Practice School internships from year three and broader recruiter diversity. Choose the dual degree if you seek early research immersion, advanced AI/ML specialization, funded thesis work and a stronger pathway into academia or R&D roles. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9162 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 20, 2025

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9162 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 20, 2025

Career
My son got admission in KCG college chennai with CSE. Now we got CSE in Amrita Chennai. My concern that Amrita chennai feeswise more than double comes to around 18 laks whereas KCG 8 laks overall Kindly suggest which one is good. Amrita is over burden for me. Still considering my son career I am ready to take loan or something to manage. Kindly suggest which one is goo
Ans: Raj Sir, KCG College of Technology, affiliated to Anna University and AICTE-approved, holds NAAC A+ and NBA accreditation for its CSE programme, a centrally located 50-acre campus with 140+ virtual and physical labs, including specialized AI, cloud and programming facilities. Its dedicated placement cell reported an 88%–94% placement rate over the past three years, with an average package of ?5 LPA and top recruiters such as Accenture, Cognizant, IBM and Amazon. Total tuition fees amount to approximately ?2 lakhs for the entire B.E. course.

Amrita School of Engineering Chennai, a constituent of Amrita Vishwa Vidyapeetham (NAAC A++), operates a 13.5-acre hill-campus with state-of-the-art AI, data-science, cybersecurity and cloud labs, and a strong industry-university research ecosystem. Its CSE graduates achieved a 90%+ placement consistency in 2024, with an average package of ?9.2 LPA and participation from 300+ recruiters including TCS, Wipro, Accenture and Amazon. Total tuition fees for B.Tech CSE are ?18 lakhs over four years.

Academically, KCG offers a robust ACM-aligned curriculum and extensive virtual-lab access, whereas Amrita provides a research-driven, choice-based credit system, extensive centers of excellence, and global collaborations. Both institutions maintain active MoUs and experienced Ph.D. faculty, but Amrita’s higher spend yields stronger median placements and broader recruiter reach.

Recommendation: Opt for Amrita Chennai CSE if investment is feasible, to leverage its superior placement outcomes, advanced research infrastructure and extensive industry linkages. Choose KCG College CSE for an accredited curriculum with solid placement consistency at a significantly lower cost, preserving financial flexibility. MY SUGGESTION: Finalise KCG and advise your son to keep upgrading his skills during the next 4 years, build a strong & professional LinkedIn Profile, improve his soft skills etc., to be competitive among other students for campus placement. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9162 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 20, 2025Hindi
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