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Anu Krishna  |1046 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 06, 2021

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
AB Question by AB on Sep 06, 2021Hindi

I'm working in a company for last 10 years and have been a consistent good performer. The management recognises it too.

But in the last 2-3 years one person from Finance (same as my level) has been consistently interfering and keeps talking negative about my work.

He makes my working as routine and not much significant to current output by constantly talking / pushing to management mentioning negatives of my doings.

He is dominating the entire company and our management knows it but doesn't contradict him on face and keep avoiding issues when we talk of it.

He controls all our efforts and denies execution / completion even if approved by CEO quoting himself as finance controller and approves for other things who doesn't object to him.

On confrontation he avoids us and changes his stance - denies he ever did it.

It is becoming very difficult to bear every day frustrations though I haven't allowed him any chance to say on my performance as every year we surpass targets with 10-15% higher achievement and collections front too we succeed efficiently.

He is been responsible for legal matters and hasn't been effective of recovery of bad debts and smartly puts onus on others for default / losses.

Pl advice me directly on mail only as I've many things to share but above should give you my mindset.

Ans: Dear A, I hear you. What still is unclear from what you have shared is what is it that you want clarity on from me?

Do you want to build a stronger mindset to deal with the situation?

Assuming (I have to assume here because, I don’t know how this is affecting you) that this is possibly keeping you on your toes as to what will be his next move, this maybe affecting your peace of mind; the only thing that I feel you can do is develop a strategy to checkmate him at every instance.

By now, you know his pattern of doing things and causing nuisance and then conveniently hiding things, it should give you an edge by simply predicting his next move and staying ahead in the game.

Most times, using the mind to strategize is more helpful rather than using it to obsess over why the other person is doing what he/she is doing.

We cannot ever control another person’s behaviour, but what we can do is reflect within and play the game smartly without creating a huge ruckus. In the end, based on my assumption, it's your peace of mind that you can be in no matter what happens outside you.

Based on the strategy through his patterned behaviour, it should give you a good head start before you embark on any project/meeting/presentation or whatever. You have experienced it and been in the midst of it all; now Observe and

Change what you do; without ever thinking that he is the one to change. He will at his own relevant time.

Spend your energies not on controlling him but on yourself and how you can plan, evaluate and execute. Focus on oneself can go a long way in changing things; personal pr professional.

(My answer is based on what little I could gather from your question)

Best wishes.

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Asked by Anonymous - Apr 29, 2024Hindi
I am software engineer aged 30 years. My manager is a sadist doesn't understand anything technically and always pester us on non essential things that doesn't matter at all in the work and deliverables. We are getting frustrated most of the times. Always blames others for his/her own mistakes. Always divides and rule the team. Always wants to go out and party even if there is lot of work and end of the day, asks for the work status. I do not want to leave the company but doesn't bare this manager at all. Please suggest what to do. I am at my low.
Ans: Hello!!
Most of us have had managers at some point in our careers, while some are helpful, compassionate, and capable, others may not meet these standards, clearly yours is not meeting the standards!! Dealing with challenging managers can be, well, a challenge. Be courageous and face the challenge, you are not a newbie you are a strong 30 yr old man.
When I worked in the corporate world, what I heard most of the times was that people don't leave a company, they leave bad bosses. Throughout your question you have always mentioned a "we", that means this bad boss is affecting many more people.
You have these options-
1. you all can send a signed petition about this boss, post this to the HR
2. nobody has to suffer at work, there will always be a way out, look for it
3. you be sincere in your work and deliver, develop a thick skin and don't allow this boss to affect you
3.if nothing works then quit, do whatever it takes to be peaceful at work

I am sure a smart 30 yr old software engineer like you "can" and "will" find a solution to this problem by choosing your options wisely and looking into what is important for you!

All the best!!

..Read more

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