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Mohit

Mohit Arora  | Answer  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Apr 27, 2024

Mohit Arora is a relationship coach, image consultant, soft skills trainer and the founder of Real Dating School. He has a BTech degree in computer science from the Rayat & Bahra Institute of Engineering and Biotechnology, Mohali, Punjab. He has been conducting customised skilling and communication workshops since 2014.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Apr 25, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hi , Iam 40 , and divorced , I Recently met a girl in my office , who is just a fresher and we have a gap of around 15 Years. Is it Ok to Continue relationship with this girl ? is the Age Gap Too Much to Handle. Should i withdraw from the relationship at the earlier stage itself rather than getting into it and later break up?

Ans: Age gap won't matter. It's about chemistry. Leonardo di Caprio Only dates women below 25. Is she into you? Does she like you?
Asked on - Apr 30, 2024 | Not Answered yet
Hi Guru, Thanks for replied. When she was staring at me quite often initially. I ignored her thinking of age gap. Later after 2 , 3 months i spoke to her ,since we travelled in same can. In conversations with her i found her to be very friendly. I fell for her, and now am meking movies, but she is kind of afraid now. She speaks to me , when she is alone. But when she is with her fri3nds , she kinda of ignores me and signls me not to talk to her. The initial stares that she gav3 me ,definitely had love.

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Hi. I am 47 year old widower and since last one year I am in love with 20 year old girl. We both are from different states, culture and even our eating habits are. She loves my caring nature and I supported her financially without expecting anything (physical relation). Now we both are serious about marriage. Her parents were initially raised concern about age difference but finally they are agree. But I am bit confused if this much big gap in age will harm our married life. She may realise it after some years. Major problem I see in future when we will think about having child..i am confused.. please advice
Ans: Dear Shailesh,
Yes, the age gap might most likely bother her in a few years when she sees you growing older when she finds a lot of younger men around.
You did mention that her parents are concerned about this alliance BUT what about the girl? What does she think of marriage with you? Since she is young, has she had the time to process if the care that you were showering her with is not actually what she has missed from her parents especially her father? You need to be very careful of this one because she could be projecting her lack of love from her parents onto you and then seek it from you!
And you are right to be concerned about children as well...when you are 60 and wanting to slow down, you might still need to push yourself till the child is at least 20...Do the Math...
Do make the girl aware of these concerns that you have and let her decide for herself independently...You will agree that you cannot become a caring figure in her life rather than a husband.

All the best!

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One fincart advisor contacted me for giving me advise regarding mutual funds and investment of sector is fincart a good company or not to invest
Ans: Hi Sammer,

An adviser/company to be categories as good or not is a bit subjective. I say this because you may find people who have had a good experience with them and those who did not have a good one.

But let me try to help you with some pointers that can help you decide
1. Before asking what they can offer you, ask them - "What do you gain by becoming my advisor?" Their response will give you insight into their objectives. If its not clearly stated, then consider it a RED flag.
2. Are they going to advise based on your preferences or they have a selected list that you need to choose from. I have heard of adviser pushing different products without considering your preferences e.g. You prefer MF and they push ULIP, Regular MF vs Direct MF etc. This can include cross selling other products that they are servicing like insurance and pension products.
3. Inquire about their process of engagement before advising you. Will they consider your requirements and evaluate them and present options to choose or start by putting the options on table and recommending MFs without understanding your goals/requirements. Simple ask, so which is the best MF scheme to invest today. If they start listing them - RED flag.
4. How will they construct a portfolio for you, structure and number of schemes in it, will it have a strategy and objective to it. Or will they keep building it over time by adding new schemes as and when. A person once came to me with a portfolio of approx. 30 lakhs with over 30 MF schemes in it - RED flag. Going beyond 5-6 schemes needs to be reviewed thoroughly.
5. What are their processes for reviewing the performance of the portfolio/schemes and how do they provide recommendation for changes in the portfolio. Will they take into account tax impacts when recommending exits.
6. Will they aim to educate you in this whole process about various aspects so as to establish and enhance their engagement, trust and your own confidence in them.
7. Most important - Will it be a fee based engagement or a commission based. Typically fee based engagements should encourage customer's preferences e.g Direct MF, using client's Demat account etc and provide recommendations for customers requirement with alternatives and options. Even when you change a recommendation, they should educate you on its impact and recommend alternative to mitigate the impact. Commission based engagements are based on their earnings from your investment. Some times their approach is to add schemes based on commissions. But there are good advisors who will stay the course of a well constructed portfolio even in this model, having the customers interest at heart.

So do your own assessment of any advisor you engage with based on the above. You can add more points of evaluation based on your own experience and knowledge.
Remember Simple strategies are more often successful.

Thanks & Regards
Janak Patel
Certified Financial Planner.

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