Married man reconnects with first love after 20 years - is the emotional connection wrong?

Hi Anu,Myself Praveen. I appreciate your writings on Rediff. First of all thanks for that.I would like to ask guidance or your thoughts on establishing a relationship with my lady friend. I met her 4 years back in my old office and we got in company soon and started talking and somewhat share most of the personal s***s too. I started having feelings for her. I mean I wish to have a marital relationship with her because I am very comfortable with her. But I was unable to make any move or feared of losing her company if I tell her my love.That time I never knew her age. Later I moved from that job to pursue some personal goals so I moved to some other place without the knowledge of my own family. The only person who knew about it was her. She stood with me and emotionally supported me and was knowing that it was my strong wish of having that dream/goal. We were in touch as nice friends. Her phone calls were happy moments for me because I was alone at my new place where I'd gone to pursue my dream. Someday she called me and during call she was upset. That day she shared some of her personal things and during the conversation I realised that she is 8 years older than me and she is at her mid 30s. Firstly, it was like a shock for me. I wondered why a beautiful girl like she not got into a marriage or any other serious relationship still that age. Okay, that doesn't matter me. However, knowing about most of the complexity in this partnership including support from both family or cliche society thoughts; I decided to have her as my life partner. But still I am not able to make a move like that. Somehow, I had to come back to my homeplace and sorry to say that I failed to pursue my goal which was bit depressing. Still I couldn't make a move to talk her about this. I am getting an odd feeling that she treats me as a brother or a nice friend only. I am confused when she calls me bro. Some days ago she told me that I am her good brother. Frankly I don't like her calling me bro. I still love her and I always see her as my life partner.The thing is I fear that I may lose her company if I express my love for her. Also I fear that she may emotionally get low if she really considering me as her brother. I don't want to give her any pain, but meanwhile I couldn't miss her in my life. Nowadays, we rarely talk on phone or meet because some of her professional engagements. That is not a problem for me. I respect her as well as her personal space. Only thing I want is to communicate her about my mind and having a relationship with her. I know she might also be concerned about our age gap as well as what society may say, but I don't care such rubbish. I strongly believe that I can be a great partner. Share your thoughts on making an approach without giving her any emotional pain or trauma.

I am 52 year old married manwith good physique and working as a higher group executive . For last few months I m in a relationship with a married lady who works with me and in just next subordinate to me who is married and 40 yr old. In my married life though I love my wife, she is keeping distance from me and our relationship is not at all in good shape. Also We r staying in separate house. I have a son 18yrs. My extramarital partner is also not happy in her family life. But she is very caring and expressed her respect and affection for me. I also care for her and I expressed my feelings to her. We respect each other very much and we feel good when we together. Our relationship is purely mutual respect and caring. No physical attraction for each other ,except occasional hug with affection. I donot know the future of our relationship. What should I do. I tried to just move on but unable to do so. She also tried as she told me, but whenever we come across we could not resist to think again and again for each other. Please advise.

Please answer my question. I need valuable suggestion. I fell in love with a married woman who is not satisfied with her husband and she have told to me that her husband is also in a extra marrital relationship. So she decided to start a relation with me and her husband and son also told her to find a partner for her. So she decided to start a relationship with me. Now my question is whether it will be ok for me to go into that relationship. It may happen that the relationship with her is not permanent and I will marry later and start a family life. Now in future is any chance that this woman and her family will interfere in my married life and something conflict will happen. Please note I will not continue the relationship with her when I will get married because I can not cheat with my wife and family.