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Should I marry my boyfriend who comes from a different caste and isn't willing to support me against his family?

Ravi Mittal |605 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 04, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Question by Komal on Nov 02, 2024Hindi

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Relationship

Hello sir ;Its been 8 years to being in a relationship with my boyfriend,now its time to get married but his family does not likes me at all ;we have different caste;also he clearly mentioned to me even if we glt married then he wont support me when clashes happen with his family what should i do ?

Ans: Dear Komal,
A partner's family opposing a love match is not uncommon, but the partner outrightly saying he won't support you or stand up for you in case of a clash is very concerning. Do you think you can live in a situation like that?

I can't tell you what to do with your life, but I would like you to reverse the situation and imagine if your partner was facing your family's backlash, would you support him or ask him to fend for himself? Depending on your honest answer, decide what you deserve.

Best Wishes.

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Mohit Arora | Answer |Ask -Follow

Dating Coach - Answered on Jan 04, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 11, 2023Hindi

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Hi I m in situation right now, where my family is almost confirmed by groom and already I have a boyfriend, since in 7 years of relationship I have already told my family about him but they are not supporting me just because of caste and standard and looks problem, can you advice what should I do now ?

Ans: You have a choice - to sacrifice your relationship with either your family or your boyfriend. In the end, if you are not happy, they won't be happy either. So I'd recommend you choose the man you like coz your future life lies with him.

Anu Krishna |1624 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 27, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 24, 2024Hindi

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I am in relationship with my bf since 11 years now.And we want to get married to each other. But my family is opposing it as he doesn't earn well. It's been an year since I had introduced him in my family, but still my family members are not accepting him.What should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Any parent will worry for the future of their children.
The responsibility of making a marriage work, bringing in the money now rests on both the partners and maybe your parents are unable to still see that as a possibility. It only means you and your BF need to go that extra mile to actually address their concerns whatever the concerns maybe.
Once you address their concerns and find solutions, you will not need to convince them and they will easily accept your relationship. Address and work on their concerns...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ravi Mittal |605 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jun 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 09, 2024Hindi

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Hey! I love a guy and want to marry him and so does he but my family is not ready to accept because we belong to different castes, he is well settled and also have secure govt job and i work as assistant professor but my family told me to leave him and look for some other guy who belongs to same caste. I just want to be with him and nobody else but they are not ready to understand. I have this feeling that he is suffering because of me when his family is ready and my isn't. What can i do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry to hear that standing in this day and age, you are facing a problem rooted in caste-related discrimination. I can only suggest you to sit with your parents and make them understand that someone's caste is not their identity. I understand that it will be very hard, especially when it's your parents, but parents can be wrong too. Try highlighting the positives and the achievements of your partner whenever you are discussing the matter with them.

Also have an open discussion about the entire ordeal with your partner. If he too feels that he is suffering because of this relationship, you might want to reassure him that things will be better soon.

Best Wishes.

Anu Krishna |1624 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 20, 2024Hindi

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Madam i am 21 years old having a good post at central government as at erly age i got job and i joint it now i am 22 and having a boyfriend he is also central government officer and he is age 29 bu despite of the age gap the love bloomed and we are so in love with each other i told my family early tge condition and said that i want to marry him but my parents said after 25 we will ger u married but by sharing this at hone they are not having trust on mr and are being insecure and wants me to leave a government job and to come home because he is not from same caste and it will also be interstate marriage my family is having the fear of relatives and my mother us against of it they are saying intercaste marriage we will not support or accept continuously emotional blackmail to me trying to manipulate, brainwash me and abusing me emotionally verbally and physically. what should i do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Inter-faith marriages are still a big NO NO in many homes and yours is not an exception. Like in many other cases, my suggestion has been that both sides must want to get to know the other person. Like your parents need to see a different side of your boyfriend to be willing to accept him.
What is it that he can bring in their daughter's life that will ease their concerns about his faith/religion?
So, your boyfriend must be willing to be patient and make efforts on his part to integrate into your family. It takes time, so be patient.
Now, for your job...do not confuse emotions and your job. Your parents feels that you might take drastic steps with your boyfriend and hence want you closer to home so that they can keep an eye on you. Address this concern by being mature and immersing yourself more into work that gives them the confidence that you are not about to do anything behind their back.
Addressing what bothers them is a better way out rather than trying to convince them...as the same issues will keep coming back if you force them to accept something. So, be patient and responsible for things to sort themselves out...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Kanchan Rai |613 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 23, 2024Hindi

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Hi mam, I am in relationship with a guy who is from different caste. It's been three years but his family is not agreeing due to family status and intercaste. My family is ready as I am the eldest daughter of my family and unturned 30 this year. I have no time but he can't marry me without his parents concent. My family is searching a boy for my marriage. I can't marry with another guy. what shall I do to marry him to convince his family or what should he do his monther is so rigid. Please ???? support us what should we do? Two lives will be spoiled bcz of this. The only problem is upper and lower caste.

Ans: Navigating a relationship where cultural norms and family expectations conflict is challenging, but it's crucial to approach it with empathy and patience.
You're deeply committed to your partner despite the pressure from his family due to caste differences. While your family supports your marriage, his family, especially his mother, is firm in their opposition. You're also facing time constraints and societal pressure, making the situation urgent and stressful.
Your partner needs to have ongoing, respectful conversations with his parents, emphasizing your love and commitment. He should explain why you are the right person for him and how you positively impact his life. Understanding and addressing their specific concerns, whether they are about societal judgment or family honor, is crucial.
Sharing personal stories and demonstrating the depth of your bond can help his parents see beyond the caste issue. Highlighting your shared values and how you both support each other can make your relationship more relatable to them.
Seek help from a trusted family member or friend who can mediate and help his parents see the relationship from a new perspective. A respected family elder who has navigated similar challenges can also be influential.
Changing deep-seated beliefs takes time. Your partner should continue to gently and persistently show his parents that his happiness lies with you. Patience will be key as they may need time to adjust to the idea
Engage with support groups or counselors experienced in intercaste relationships. They can provide valuable advice and emotional support.
Discuss potential scenarios if his parents don’t approve. Consider whether options like elopement or giving them time to come around could work for both of you. These conversations should be open and honest to ensure mutual understanding.

Throughout this process, maintain strong communication and support each other emotionally. Navigating these challenges together will strengthen your bond and help you both find a path forward that honors your relationship and family ties.

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Anu Krishna |1624 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2025Hindi

Relationship

, I have been married for almost 14 years and have a 10 year old. A few months ago my husband found some intimate chats of mine with someone else. I am extremely remorseful of my actions. Honestly those chats happened because my husband never showed me any love or concern. However I know that's not excuse to have those chats. After seeing those chats he got extremely angry and threw me out of the house. It's been more than 3 months. He is not willing to forgive me. He wants separation and he has told our daughter also that we are separated. I am so heartbroken that because of my blunder I lost my husband and daughter. Is there any way I can get back with my husband

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There are always going to be reasons to do something or not do something and there is no point mulling over it.
For your husband, his trust has been broken!
Now, is it hard to bring back that trust? Yes, especially with the way your husband has reacted on it. He does seem sensitive about the whole thing and understand that it has possibly hit the pride of a man who is meant to keep his family happy and safe. Suddenly, the world that he had protected is encroached upon by another man. Your husband is bound to feel 'less', 'inadequate' and 'worthless'. That is why he has opted to separate as he finds it difficult to reconcile or even think of why he could not take care of his family.
Now, rather than beating yourself up for it, gather the courage to talk to your husband requesting him for a one on one chat with you. If you want this marriage to work, even your husband needs to work with you...no point acting on it the way he has and not take the responsibility of connecting with you emotionally that could possibly have been one of the reasons that you sought comfort elsewhere. An expert intervention will help provided your husband is also willing.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Anu Krishna |1624 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 24, 2025

Question by Niveditha - Jun 07, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Hi ma'am I'm 25 years old and my relationship with my parents is getting sour since a very long time they always want me to do everything that makes them happy and think about their happiness if I ever think about my happiness or do anything that makes me happy then they fight with me and portray me as a bad daughter and my dad has always said that if she will ever think about her happiness or do anything that makes her happy then I'm gonna leave everything and go so does my mom she also threatened to cut ties with me if I ever do anything that makes me happy my parents never supported me for anything they never ask me who I wanna get married to who I'll b happy with what profession i wanna take nothing but it's always about them in my family there are 16 members who have had love marriage and inter religion marriages my grandmother stays 15kms away from my house she has 3 kids 2 of her daughters had a love marriage one to a muslim one to a hindu her one daughter ran and got married to a hindu guy at that time my mom dad and her mom didn't even say a word but accepted him with open arms and my grandmother got her 2nd daughter married to her boyfriend who is a muslim during Covid 2020 without informing any of our relatives when my parents got to know about her daughters marriage they invited her for lunch at my place they didn't even say a word or opposed that marriage but accepted him with open arms and showered them with love When I fell in love with a hindu guy my mom started to seperate me from him and she is telling everyone to brainwash me to leave the person person I love and find a suitable Christian guy for me when ever we go to my grandmother's house my mom always brings up my boyfriend's topic and start fighting with me infront of them we went there 3 times and all the 3 times she fighted with me and told everyone to brainwash me my mom always support my grandmother's children if anything happens to them she will call them 10 times and ask how they are and when my grandmother was ill treating me my mom didn't even take a stand for me or raised her voice for me but she was watching everything as a movie is going on when I was crying after we came back to my house my mom didn't even ask me what am I going through she always support my grandmother who did bad with me if they will say not to let her work and get her married my mom will listen to her and her daughters and my grandmother also started forcing me that I should also listen to her and get married to a guy who they choose and i should not at all think about my happiness and what makes me happy in my life and i should think about her and my parents happiness and my uncle who lives in Hyderabad he also started to get interfere in my personal life since the time he got to know I fell in love with a hindu guy he also started to seperate me from him and forcefully get me marriage to a guy of his choice my uncle's wife has been expired 15 years back and this age he has a girlfriend who lives in banglore she is a divorcee and her daughter is also a divorcee who he met in Facebook i didn't interfere in anyone's personal life or seperated them from their boyfriend or girlfriend and everyone who have had love marriages in my family and everyone are happy with their partners when it comes to me my parents uncle my grandmother and her daughters who have had love marriage always try to seperate me from my boyfriend and forcefully get me married to a Christian guy if anyone in my family will fall in love with a inter religion person then he/she is a good guy/girl according to them if I fall in love they seperate me from him and forcefully get me Married to a Christian guy i told my parents many times to talk to him and know him but they are like no we don't like him and they always say he is not a good person and always judge my boyfriend even without talking or knowing him once but for others even without talking to their partners they say he is a good person and they will accept him with open arms and also invite them for lunch and everything and will always stay at their place during trips but if I do they will mentally harass me to leave the person I love and get married to a guy of their choice recently we went to Bangalore for my sister's marriage who also had a love marriage at that time my uncle had come to the wedding and he was asking my mom did u brainwash her to leave him and get her married to someone else and my mom was saying yes I did with my aunt's daughter who also had love marriage I don't understand why they always try to seperate me from the person I love and forcefully get me married to someone else who I'm not at all interested in when I'm telling them about him they are not ready to listen to me at all plus they are mentally harassing me to leave him if I take help of any of my relatives who had love marriages in this matter they will not listen to me but force me to listen to my parents and do as they say what should I do ma'am I'm shattered

Ans: Dear Niveditha,
I gather that many members of your family are against your relationship and interfering in a way that will keep you away from him. My question to you is: Are you financially independent? If Yes, it helps you stand up for yourself. But is NO, then this will make you vulnerable to their decisions...
Now another question: why are they so against this boy? Is he younger to you or not working and financially sound? I mean, what is the reason according to you that they have chosen to be against this when they are okay with others in the family doing the same?
There is surely something that they are not comfortable when it comes to the boy that you are in love with. Find out what that is; it's the question of you life, so don't be so floored by love that you miss out on a red flag. Also, it will help if you stop comparing your situation to others and indulge in so much self-pity. Focus on what exactly is going on, ask your parents as a mature adult on why they dislike the boy and understand if it's real or not and act accordingly. so much of blame game and self-pity will only take your focus out and you will end up more miserable and not do what's the right thing for yourself.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 24, 2025Hindi

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Sir My Son is having cse Jaypee noida, DSAI in Thapar,CSE Manipal bengluru likely get manipal main in next round, which is abetter choice . please help in selecting one.

Ans: Hello dear.
Preference order: (1) DS AI @ Thapar (2) CSE @ Manipal Bangalore (3) CSE @ Manipal main if offered (4) CSE @ Jaypee. The final choice will be yours.
Best of luck.
Follow me if you like the reply. Thanks
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Radheshyam Zanwar |3887 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 24, 2025Hindi

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Sir.my pcm b 63%.I eligible for JEE Mains.

Ans: Hello dear
Please provide more details and ask the question very clearly without using any abbreviations.

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Question by Manti - Jun 24, 2025Hindi

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Sir me 27 saal ka ho chuka hu aur mujhe avi civil engineering se diploma karna hai to kya me kar sakta hu aur aage jake mujhe job lene me koi dikkat to nhi hogi mere age ko leke pls guidance kijiye

Ans: Hello Mantri.
You can join a diploma course at any time. There is no age limit. There should be no problem in getting jobs. However, considering your age, it might be better to choose other career options.
Best of luck.
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Radheshyam Zanwar |3887 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 24, 2025Hindi

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Hello sir, My Nephew got 84.7 percentile in MHCET and in NMIMS phase 2 test got 3747 merit number What are his chances to get good college for ECE or CS branch. He is from other state as well Also how about IT branch compare to CSE if he can go for that. NMIMS councelling is on 26th and MHCET CAP round has not started, shall he wait for MHCET CAP round. Please suggest

Ans: Hello dear.
With the MHT-CET score, his chances of getting CS or ECE are very slim in Govt colleges, but he may get a seat in private colleges located in remote areas. If NMIMS offers you CS/ECE, then go with it.
Best of luck.
Follow me if you like the reply. Thanks
Radheshyam

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Sir, I have 1000 Eskay k 'N' IT shares and 10 Innovative Foods shares, but they are not trading. Now, what to do?

Ans: waiting, there is nothing that you can do now.

Radheshyam Zanwar |3887 Answers |Ask -Follow

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Question by It's - Jun 24, 2025Hindi

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My son get iit delhi civil kya uska place ment it co. Mai ho jayega

Ans: Hello dear.
Civil @ IIT Delhi is an excellent option and has bright chances of placement. Don't worry much more.
Best of luck.
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Radheshyam Zanwar |3887 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 24, 2025

Question by Jaiprakash - Jun 24, 2025Hindi

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Sar Meri daughter ko MH CET mein PCB main 67% marks Aaye Hain aur PCM mein 47 percent marks Aaye Hain vah AI engineer ki padhaai karna chahti hai aap kuchh suggest Karen kaun sa college sahi hai Ham Nagpur mein rahte hain

Ans: Hello jaiprakash
Please contact the administrative office of your preferred college in Nagpur and inquire about the availability of the AI branch through the management quota. If available, proceed with the admission. Note: Based on his score in PCM, branches like AI / ML / CSE may pose academic challenges for her.
Best of luck.
Follow me if you like the reply. Thanks
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Radheshyam Zanwar |3887 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 24, 2025

Question by sudhakar - Jun 24, 2025Hindi

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My Son got 1141 Rank in SRMJEE and he already have admission offer from KIIT bhubaneswar For CSE. Which option should we go with. Or should we go with EC or CS. Please advise

Ans: Hello Sudhakar, both options are strong, and choosing between SRM and KIIT is difficult. What SRM will offer is still unclear. If SRM offers CSE, then pick either KIIT or SRM, whichever is closer to your hometown,n to reduce expenses.
Best of luck.
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