Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

Worried Mother: Son Acting Differently After Holiday?

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |607 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Aug 13, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship

Dear Mam, I had sent my son for a holiday. He is 18 years old. However after returning from holiday, he has become very quite,gets angry at times, finds faults and does not listen

Ans: Instead of confronting him directly about his change in behavior, try to create a safe space where he feels comfortable opening up. Let him know you’ve noticed the change and that you’re there to listen whenever he’s ready. Sometimes, asking indirect questions about the holiday—who he met, what he did, and how he felt about the trip—can give you some clues about what might have triggered this shift.

If he is unwilling to talk, don’t push too hard. Instead, observe him closely. Has his routine changed? Is he withdrawing from friends, studies, or activities he used to enjoy? If this continues for a long period, you may need to consider speaking to someone he trusts—a sibling, a close friend, or even a counselor—who might be able to help him open up.

Sometimes, young adults go through emotional turbulence that they don’t know how to express. The best thing you can do right now is to be patient, keep communication open, and let him know that whatever it is, you are there for him without judgment.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |607 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 01, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Dr. Madam My son,30 yr old, is MBA and serving MNC earning 25000 pm . He shows a very awkward behaviour , rude to family members, very adamant, careless, no charm for marriage and above all shows no responsibility. He takes everything as burden, curses peoples. Always remains fearful of his looks as his beard n hairs getting gray. We consult many psychiatrist but no result. Your suggestions please.
Ans: Your son's behavior, being rude, adamant, and showing little responsibility, coupled with his fear about his appearance, suggests he might be dealing with significant underlying issues such as depression, anxiety, or another mental health condition. The fact that psychiatric consultations haven't yielded results yet indicates that his situation might be complex and in need of a more nuanced approach.

It's essential to consider that sometimes, the right combination of therapeutic methods and practitioners takes time to find. A comprehensive evaluation by a multidisciplinary team could provide fresh insights. This team might include not only psychiatrists but also psychologists and possibly other specialists who can look at his situation from various angles.

Building a strong therapeutic alliance is crucial. The effectiveness of treatment often hinges on the quality of the relationship between the patient and the therapist. Encouraging your son to continue seeking a therapist he feels comfortable with might make a significant difference. It's not uncommon for people to try several therapists before finding the right fit.

Incorporating holistic approaches can also be beneficial. Practices such as mindfulness, meditation, or yoga can help with emotional regulation and stress management. Physical activities and maintaining a healthy diet can have positive effects on mental health. These approaches, combined with professional therapy, might help your son find more balance and relief.

Support groups can be incredibly valuable as well. They provide a space where individuals can share their experiences and feel understood. Encouraging your son to connect with others who face similar challenges can offer emotional support and practical advice, which might help him feel less isolated in his struggles.

It's clear that you care deeply for your son and want the best for him. Navigating this journey requires patience, persistence, and compassion—for both him and yourself. It's important to take care of your well-being too, as supporting a loved one with mental health challenges can be exhausting and emotionally draining. Seeking support for yourself, whether through therapy, support groups, or other resources, can equip you with the strength and resilience needed to continue being there for your son.

..Read more

Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 05, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Dear Dr Ashish, How do I get my 14 year old teenage son to talk to me? He talks less, is either angry or grumpy and rarely discusses anything at home with anyone. Is this behaviour normal? He used to be a talkative child when he was younger. How can I help?
Ans: Let me reassure you that you’re not alone in facing this challenge, and what you describe is quite common in teenagers. The teenage years are a time of immense internal transformation. It's as if your son is building a new version of himself, one brick at a time, and sometimes, in that process, he may feel the need to pull away to figure things out.

You see, as children grow, their world expands. Their focus shifts from being family-centered to exploring who they are in the larger world. This doesn't mean he cares any less about you; it simply means he’s working on something deep within himself—maybe even trying to understand emotions and situations he doesn’t yet have the words for.

Now, instead of trying to make him talk, which might feel like pressure to him, consider this: how can you create an environment where he wants to open up? Imagine if, instead of asking direct questions or expressing concern, you shared a small, non-threatening piece of your world. Maybe a funny story about your day or a memory of when you were his age. Sometimes, starting with something light gives him permission to engage without feeling interrogated.

Another way to open doors is through shared experiences. Teenagers often speak more freely when they're not face-to-face. Maybe a walk or a ride, cooking a meal together, or even playing a video game could become moments where he feels comfortable talking.

And when he does speak, no matter how small the opening, meet him with curiosity, not judgment. If he shares something, reflect it back to him in a way that says, "I hear you, and I value what you're saying." For example, if he mentions feeling frustrated, you could say, "It sounds like something’s been tough for you lately," rather than jumping to advice.

Finally, remind yourself—and him—this is a phase, not a permanent state. He is still that talkative child deep inside, but right now, he's learning to balance his need for independence with the safety of your love. Your steady presence, even when he seems distant, will be his anchor.

You’re already asking the right question, and that shows how much you care. Trust the process, and trust your connection. It’s still there, even in the quiet moments.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |3473 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 18, 2025

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |6515 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 16, 2025
Career
Dear Sir, My son's JEE mains (year 2025) rank is 52330. JEE ADVANCED rank is 13975. General catagory. IAT score 139 marks. He is interested in research in Physics and / or Maths from IISC / top 3 IISERs. His class 12th score is 99% for MPC and overall 86%. Please guide.
Ans: With an IAT score of 139 placing him within the 120–130 general cutoff bracket, top IISERs including Pune, Kolkata and Mohali are within reach; their last-round closing ranks ranged between 1,023 (Pune) and 1,801 (Kolkata) in 2024, translating to expected IAT marks of 125–140 for general candidates. His JEE Advanced rank of 13,975 fits IISc Bangalore’s BSc Physics cutoff of 903–1,000 (General AI quota) and BSc Mathematical Sciences cutoff near 1,095, though female cutoff relaxations slightly wider for general candidates. JEE Main rank (52,330) cannot secure BSc at IISc via JoSAA’s AI quota but JEE Advanced suffices. His 99% in PCM and 86% aggregate meet all eligibility criteria. IISc’s BSc Research programs report 90–95% placement rates over three years in STEM roles, while IISER graduates similarly achieve 85–92% placements in academic and research positions. Recommendation: Prioritize registering for IAT counselling with preferences set to IISER Pune, IISER Kolkata and IISER Mohali, while listing IISc BSc Physics and Mathematics at the top contingent on JEE Advanced rank, ensuring multiple high-probability research-focused admission avenues. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

...Read more

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |6515 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 18, 2025

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x