Anu Krishna |1391 Answers |Ask -Follow
Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 21, 2021
Similar situation happened in my life just 3 months back.
But here in my case I waited till 5 years and I have given a child to my husband. But there is no change in the situation.
Rather it became critical in such a way that my husband started harassing me physically, mentally.
Now, he is asking for mutual divorce.
I need suggestion from you how you handled the situation.
Have you checked with every woman or is this statement based on your experience and of a few others around you?
Making generalised statements like these, can play the villain in infusing more unwanted thoughts and situations in your life more that the people involved in it.
When you say, ‘I gave a child to my husband,’ does it mean that you were not ready to be a mother then?
I am sure you had a choice to say NO if you were not ready.
When we begin to play ‘victim’, it is easy to keep pulling instances that prove how unfairly we have been treated and play that over and over again till it feels absolutely true.
Instead, why don’t you list the problem accurately?
Assuming right now (as I don’t have much details from you), that you have been treated unfairly and that your husband has harassed you mentally and physically, if divorce is what he wants, do you also feel the same?
If you want to save your marriage, then look for a family therapist who can definitely help with that. But if you feel that you have reached the end of the runway and can’t take it anymore, maybe a mutual consent divorce maybe a better option.
Whatever that the two of you decide, remember that there is a child who is part of this entire situation and needs love and reassurance from both parents that he/she will still get a loving home to grow up in.
Most often couples who argue forget the repercussions that this has on a child and the egos get the better of them.
Whatever you do, there is ‘NO OTHER’ that can come into a marriage, no mother-in-law or anyone else.
Bringing anyone in complicates the marriage and any decision taken because of their treatment towards you cannot contribute to a failure in your marriage.
So choose wisely and take wise steps to do what’s best for your marriage, life and your child.
All the best for a clear mind and a great life!
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