Dear Doc., My Son falls under handicapped category. he is good in studies and intelligent. Has a postgraduate degree. because of his problem, he likes to stay aloof and stay at home, may be because of his hearing and speech problem. doesn't like to go out and any one visiting us. He is not using his intelligence in concrete work/ manner. Any kind of screen is his best time pass and remains irritated and angry. how to counsel him is our problem, because the moment we try to discuss about his progress, going to job etc. he disengages himself and goes away. please advise.

Ans: Your query has already been replied to you. Please copy and paste the following link in your browser to read it again - https://gurus.rediff.com/hi/question/qdtl/career/given-12th-xam-first-2024-unable-score-75-percentage-gave/5244427

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Radheshyam

Ans: Yes — you can apply your EWS certificate in the JEE Main 2026 April attempt,

Ans: First — your frustration is valid

What you are experiencing at Sairam is not engineering, it is rote-based credential production.

“When did engineering become memorizing instead of learning?”

Sadly, this shift happened decades ago in most Tier-3 private colleges in India.

About “coding platforms & points” – your observation is sharp

You are absolutely right:

Mandatory coding points → students copy solutions

Copying ≠ learning

Debugging & thinking are missing

This is pseudo-skill education — it looks modern but produces shallow engineers.

The fact that you noticed this in 1st year already puts you ahead of 80% students.

Should you DROP OUT and prepare for JEE / VITEEE / SRMJEEE?

Although VIT/SRM is better than Sairam Engineering College, but you may face the same problem. You will not face this type of problem only in some top IITs, but getting seat in those IITs will be difficult.
Instead of dropping immediately, consider:

???? Strategy:

Stay enrolled (degree security)

Reduce emotional investment in college rules

Use:

GitHub

Open-source projects

Hackathons

Internships (remote)

Hardware / software self-projects

This way:

College = formality

Learning = self-driven

Risk = minimal

Ans: JEE Main ke liye 12th pass hona hi kaafi hai, 75% criteria sirf NIT / IIT / IIIT / GFTI admission ke liye hota hai.

NIOS ek valid board hai (CBSE ke barabar maana jata hai).

Agar aap 2026 me NIOS se 12th pass kar lete ho, to:

Aap 2026, 2027, 2028 me JEE Main de sakte ho.

Ans: Hello Sudhir Ji
it will be very difficult for me to suggest on this.

Ans: Yes, you can complete 12th again from NIOS and appear for JEE Main, but JEE Advanced has age, attempt, and year-of-passing restrictions, so eligibility for JEE (Adv) may still be an issue.

Honest opinion & suggestion - Even after 3 failed trials, why are you running behind JEE? It would be better to appear for the state-level engineering examination. Get admission to your preferred college and branch. Complete your undergraduate degree. While pursuing UG, appear for GATE. Crack it. With a high score, you can get admission to PG @ IIT. The dream of IIT can be easily fulfilled via this route. There is no sense in appearing for JEE again, especially after completing 12th @ NIOS board. It is just a waste of time, money, and effort.

The final decision will be yours! Only I can suggest.

Good luck.
Follow me if you receive this reply.
Radheshyam

Ans: Hello Saroja
Student can appear JEE-Mains for three years starting from his 12th appeared year. So the answer for your is NO.

Ans: I don't think there should be any problem. They may ask you to submit the affidavit if they feel so.
In the mean time you can get your aadhar updated as per your marksheet.

Ans: Your brother’s distance is not a rejection of you. It is his way of protecting himself. He went through a difficult marriage, an emotional collapse, and then watched people around him — including you — react out of desperation to fix things for him. Even though your intentions came from love, he may have associated those actions with more pain and pressure. When a person has been wounded, silence feels safer than conversation. His withdrawal simply means he is tired, not that he dislikes you.
You also need to understand that the guilt you are carrying is heavier than it needs to be. You tried to intervene in his marriage because you wanted to protect him, not because you wanted to cause harm. Looking back now, with more maturity and clarity, you see the mistakes, but at that time, you were acting out of fear and love. This is why it’s important to forgive yourself instead of punishing yourself over and over.
The conflict between your wife and your brother only added another layer of stress, because it forced you into choosing sides. Your wife reacted emotionally, your brother pulled away, your parents questioned the imbalance — and in the middle of all this, you lost your sense of peace. But their disagreements are not failures on your part. They are the natural result of people operating from insecurity, fear, and past hurt.
What needs to happen now is a shift in your role. You cannot continue trying to solve everything for everyone. You cannot carry your brother’s marriage, your wife’s fears, and your parents’ judgments all at once. It’s time to step out of the role of rescuer and step into the role of a grounded, calm brother who offers presence, not solutions.
Rebuilding your bond with your brother will not come from pushing proposals, sending gifts, or trying to fix his life. It will come from offering him emotional safety. A simple message, expressing that you are sorry for any hurt, that you care for him, and that you are available whenever he feels ready, will speak louder than any effort to arrange his future. Once you send such a message, the healthiest thing you can do is give him space. Sometimes relationships repair themselves in silence, when pressure is removed.
And for yourself, healing begins when you stop believing that every problem in the family rests on your shoulders. You have given more than enough over the years. Now you deserve emotional rest. You deserve peace. You deserve to feel like a brother, not a crisis manager.
Your brother may take time, but distance does not erase love. When he feels safe, he will come closer again. Your responsibility is not to force that moment, but to make sure you are emotionally steady and ready when it happens.