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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1595 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 01, 2022

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
JV Question by JV on Nov 01, 2022Hindi
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Relationship

Hi Anu I am 30 years old. I have done LLB and was not interested to practice in court so I tried to get a private job but I didn't get any.
Then I decided to start preparing for a government job but I missed it. I started to doubt myself.
I even had suicidal thoughts this was started when I was very little something happened to me when I was 16 since then I tried to kill myself and also tried to get involved with one of my friends in college. He liked me so much so we started having relationship.
When intimacy started I became nervous and afraid. It is like itching.
I want to run and hide in a safe place. He was very firm and honest and humble but didn't work out.
After that so many proposals came. I declined. Now my family wants me to marry.
I don't know if the husband would understand and give me some time to get involved with him. I don’t know what life after marriage would be.

I am a girl with absolutely no achievement and am not proud of anything in my life.
My parents are disappointed in me but they never show. What should I do? Pls do not disclose this

Ans:

Dear JV,

It’s possibly the incident that happened to you (which I understand that you haven’t shared here) is preventing you from having a fulfilling life.

I can only say that the incident happened in the past, but you are living it even now.

You were a victim in that incident, but to continue to play the victim even now is to give your power away.

How can you be happy by giving your inner power away every day and every moment?

Reclaim your life.

What’s happened can be blurred by moving away from that incident and reminding yourself that you are far away from the past and in the NOW.

  • Be grateful to what you have in the present
  • Make a list of your strengths
  • Write down your goal clearly by stating by when you want to achieve it

Remember bringing your past into the current time robs you of any goodness; professionally or personally.

So, to see something change, change the way you feel about your past.

Step out of the victim mode and become a person who has the power to change things at will.

I am sure you want to see how this pans out for you.

So, what are you waiting for? Step up and bring that newness of thought into your life.
All the best!

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1595 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 01, 2021

Relationship
I am 27 years old and I have been married for 3 months now. Married life is already suffocating me may be because I never wanted to get married in the first place. I knew my parents were not gonna let me be and will definitely get me married so I wanted to marry a guy of my choice at least (even if it is arranged marriage). Anyways I tried all that I can to avoid this marriage because I didn't like the way this guy talked about certain things and we had no similarities. Except for the fact that my parents knew their family and he was educated there was nothing I liked about him. I thought it was the right thing if my parent said that I wasn't interested in this proposal so I tried to make my parents understand. I tried to discuss, argued, cried, stopped eating, did everything I could to stop but they wouldn't budge. Turns out he had already given his word. My dad threatened me that he would take his own life if this marriage doesn't happen. My entire life, every single decision was taken by my dad. From college, BTech, basically everything. Since there was at least one thing that I gained out of his decision I didn't bother much. I gained a friend for life in my 12th standard and in BTech, I was able to meet lots of people and that to a certain extent changed my thought process. Other than that since I was 15 I never got to do anything I ever wanted to do. Well my dad's threat worked. I got married thinking maybe ... just may be there might be something that I might gain. My parents are in Hyderabad and my husband works in Bangalore. In the 3 months I lived with him, the first month it was just us and now my in laws stays with us. Every second made me anxious. I keep thinking..what if they say something if I use my phone or if I sit down or spend some time at the balcony. Apart from me being stressed, anxious and hating the situation I was in and losing lots and lots of hair, everything was fine. My husband was always working. He works everyday till 10 pm and after my in laws came he spends all the time with his mom. Well that didn't bother me, i just thought that he just loved his mom so much. Nobody said anything until the day I mentioned wanting to come home as I had some work at my previous office. Out of nowhere my mother-in-law mentions how I was not their 1st choice for their son. They had lots of proposals lined up but chose me because I am from Hyderabad even though I was fat and our family wasn't rich. I didn't think it was right to say anything to her so I didn't say a word. On the day I was travelling to Hyderabad, my husband complains how I don't do the household work as much or help my mother in law. he says I sleep a lot. He wants me to quit my job and sit at home. They have problem if I order clothes to where at home. I work night shift so I tend to sleep during the day but I make sure to help my mom in law to a certain extent. When it was just us in the 1st month it was me who did all the chores and I had to do WFH too. I made it very clear to him that I will not leave my job which he didn't like and he asks me not to return and just stay at my parent's place. I explained all this to my parents and they are trying to send me back as soon as possible. Everybody who got involved in this like my parents, the uncle who brought the proposal says that it is my responsibility to change my husband. I don't see how I can change a person who thinks that everything he does is right and it is wife's responsibility to initiate a conversation even if husband doesn't and he has his entire family backing him on this. I cant seem to change my mind or my parent's mind. I can't seem to make myself like my husband. At this rate I don't know if there is any future with him at all. I mean people who wants a maid and not a wife and who thinks this way and insults others.... I am not sure if they are gonna change. My parents want to force me into this just for the fear that I might be left alone in life and more importantly for the reputation of the family but they don't think that in this marriage I will for ever be anxious and unhappy. Please help and extremely sorry for the long letter.
Ans: Dear A, Isn't it time that you took charge of your life?

If what you mentioned happened exactly that way, take charge of your life now.

It doesn't make any sense changing anyone; they will change only when they want to and wish to. But it's also worth it to figure out if you are blaming your marriage for your misery.

Do become aware if you are basing your unhappiness on things that should have happened and then blaming your marriage to aggravate that situation. This isn’t healthy.

Sometimes in life, we don't get what we have planned but with a better mind, it is possible to set things right.

Is it possible that your unhappy state of mind might also have caused a lot of unrest within the marriage?

Also, I will agree that it is quite hurtful when you hear from your in-laws that you weren't the first choice for their son.

So, you are in a place where you have to figure out: Which hurts you more... the fact that you didn't want to get married in the first place and was forced into it or the fact that your in-laws aren't happy with you.

Two different sides of the coin; which side is your situation in?

Think and reflect deeply because only you know how to get to a space that keeps you happy and sane.

If walking out of the marriage is what you feel, then do that keeping in mind how life is going to be financially and emotionally.

If you decide to work on the marriage, then have a clear communication involving your parents and in-laws and husband as well and work through the fact that your in laws maybe with you forever and this is a fact that needs to be accepted for your peace of mind.

Being anxious will not help. Do get help from a marriage counsellor to strengthen your relationship.

Whatever that decision maybe, stick by it and do it only because you want it and not because you think someone caused it.

We are all a product of our choices and every choice must only lead to a better state of mind and thereby a better life.

Be happy always!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1595 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 10, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi mam, I was in a relationship with a guy for 3 months he was uneducated but I’m a S.E. Initially everything was fine but later he started like u should not talk with other boys you should not go there you should not wear this kind of dress, I’m your husband so you should listen to me whatever I say u should do that like he started. Then he started mentally abused with so many bad words nd he slapped me twice. So I decided I don’t want to be in this relationship so I said him. Then he kept some fellows to follow me to check wat I’m doing where I’m going to get all these details. And then he said I will show both of our to your family, I will kill you like this he started. Now it is almost 2 year I’m leading my life but sometimes he will call me he will threaten me I don’t know what to do how to overcome this I can’t tell to my family I’m depressed can u please tell me what I have to do
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Are you married? Because he said that he is your husband...I am confused...

Anyway, NO, he has no business controlling you this way...Emotional and Physical Abuse is a strict NO NO...
Tell your family and do that NOW!!!!!!!
This man seems to be acting in a violent manner and your safety should be more of a concern...it was 2 slaps, then after that? When you did not protest for that, he simply has got the message that violence is okay with you...
No, it's not okay, right? And that's why you wrote on this platform...

Do the right thing for yourself...Protect yourself from this person first! Threats of killing you did not set off alarm bells? Why are you still letting him off so easy? This is NOT love...he is just a familiar person to you.
Familiarity does not mean Safety!!!!!! (Read this again)...

Involve your family and let him know that you are not alone; he will stop his threats knowing that you will respond to the rubbish he is subjecting you to! Speak with your family...

All the best!
Dear Anonymous,
No, Age is not so important in a marriage; but if it isn't, then why did you hide the fact of your real age? You have givem it that importance enough to hide it, yeah?
And any relationship based on lies or a hidden fact can cause damages...
The only way that I can see is work with the Counselor and appeal to your husband as well. Tell him that your child needs the love of both parents. Hear what he has to say...and yes, he is bound to bring up the age factor over and over again...it is something that he feels cheated with...so, respect it...Like I said, Apologize like you really mean it...

And oh, why are you so bothered about how he will treat other women in his life? Just focus on your life and your marriage...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |581 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 03, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Madam am working women of age 28 working for past 5 years , I am in living relationship with my boyfriend who is 38 now. I want to do marriage and settle now but my partner doesn't feel necessary to do marriage and if I force he is telling he will do court marriage which am not interested to do. He is not ready to meet or convince my parents for marriage . I have given him money for buying a property which I was least interested. He started controlling all my finances which I felt incorrect so I questioned him which made his ego hurt and he has hit me twice. My parents are now telling me to get married but I don't know what to do. Sometimes when he ia not around I tried talking to other guys in dating app which afterwards am feeling guilty for cheating him. Nowadays I lost interest in everything I don't have courage to end my life so not able to concentrate on my work. Please tell me what I need to do to correct my path as it's getting hell day by day.
Ans: Right now, it might be helpful to take a step back from the relationship to regain your sense of self and control over your life. Talking to a trusted friend, family member, or even a counselor could help you find clarity, and having a support system can make it easier to make decisions that protect your well-being.

It’s understandable that you feel torn, especially since you’ve invested years and finances into this relationship. But it’s important to remember that you deserve a relationship where you feel valued, safe, and equal. The feelings of guilt about talking to others on dating apps are natural, but they’re also a sign that you might be searching for connection and respect that you’re not receiving in your current relationship.

Consider reclaiming control over your finances immediately. Seek guidance on how to separate your financial dealings from him, as it’s essential for you to be able to support and manage yourself independently. Ending this relationship might be difficult, but it could also give you the freedom to rebuild your confidence, focus on your goals, and find the stability and respect you deserve.

It’s clear that you’re strong enough to make changes; the courage you’ve shown in questioning his control and sharing your story here is proof. With the support of loved ones and professionals, you can find a way out of this painful situation and start building a life that brings you peace and happiness.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1595 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 07, 2025Hindi
Relationship
I had a very bad past where I was in physical relationship with like 10 guys that was due to the earlier relationship I had where I was being used financially and physically that hurt and me and I got really f***** up in my mind so I started dating guys just for physical relationship then the last guy I was in relationship with I got pregnant with a baby and I aborted it because I did not want to have a future with him and also I did not have confidence to grow that baby. then 4 months later I met my husband I fell in love with him at the first meet and we had physical thing at the very first meet. during the second meet he read the group chat between me and my friends where we spoke bad words ,my husband was not okay with that and he was really feeling bad about it and he started to talk about our break up.I was waiting for my final yr results when I met him soon I got my result then I have to start my internship my husband paid 5 lacs rupees for me but he was anxious that I will be with the friends who I was talking bad words with in college and he wanted to have a breakup and he fighted everyday with that reason .I promised him that I will not be that person anymore and I won't talk to my friends. one day I helped my friend with work for which my husband got angry and he wanted to have a break up and he started to talk about the last guy which I said that he was a friend before and I don't talk to him anymore then he raised question about him and then I told him that I was having a Friends with benefit relationship with him, then things got bitter and he seriously wants break up this time,.everyday he talks to me about that and fights with me I stop going to college .one day I made a suicide attempt and then 2 days after he started talking to me normally. soon again he started asking all those questions about the last guy I have been with, he asked very minute questions about the day and dates and he fighted with me everyday for that. there is a friend of mine who knows everything about my past ,in all these chaos,things got bitter between me and her and we stop talking. one day my husband talked to her and he asked everything about me and he got to know all about my past and he said that he took all the history of my chats ,apps and photos and asked me questions repeatedly and I told him everything completely without hiding anything. then things got messed up. I was really distressed, then my family got involved and things got very bitter, he told everything about my past to my mother. one day, they made me stop talking to him. he sent message to my sister in law and brother about my past, then my mother went to my husband's sister and told her that my husband is making a big mess not allowing me to go to internship and he has all our intimate pictures then things got Messed up more and he stopped talking to me. he was just asking me the 5 lakhs rupees he paid for me and then we stopped talking for about a week, I turned completely insane during that period and I sent him txt that I am not able to live without him .then we started talking, few days after he was okay with me going to the college then again he started fighting he was not ok with me to go to college. then we decided to get register married which a day later he denied.then I ran away from my house to him ,he received me and I was with him for 3 months we lived together for 3 months during which period he spoke really bad of me because of my past which I endured because I was really feeling guilty of my past and I thought I deserved it. he was asking even all those small personal things and he hurted me so much with his words which was mere verbal abuse ,meanwhile I got pregnant then he introduced me to his family and then we got married registered in front of our family. it was an inter religious marriage. all this time he controls me for every little thing like I should do this and I should do that which I did not take seriously then. now everything got secured my mom wanted me to complete my degree in my hometown because I was not able to complete it anywhere else but my husband was not ok with me going to my hometown to complete my degree because of my past things. I have financial things to take care of because of the money spent for my degree so I was thinking to make a deal either to finish my degree or I wanted my husband to give back the money that was spent for my degree because he said so but then later he started to humiliate my family for expecting money from me and he told that they we just see me as an investment to earn back the money they spent on me. But my family wanted me to complete the degree at the first place.this created a lot of arguments between me and him . Finally,one day my mom approach his family and she wanted me to come with her to complete my degree but my husband was not ok with it and I was still supporting him my mom told that she will die if I didn't complete my degree because that was all that she dreamed for me her entire life. then they sent me to my hometown with my mom to complete my degree. after coming here my husband did not talk to me for 2 days, then he texted me that he does not want to live with me. he told that I and my family were being fake and we were using him and we broke him into pieces and made him go through the pain which he did not deserve. I got really emotional and I told him that I wanted to go back to him. he told me that he will take me to him the next day that he will book a bus for me to reach back to him but he did not contact me the next day .then a day later he started making arguments again this time, he said that he wanted divorce from me because he cannot have a life with me .he told that he does not want to be in my life and our child's life, if I want he can give financial support for my child's growth. I denied the money and I told him that I am not willing for a divorce unless or otherwise he wants to marry another girl then he 3 hrs later, he sent a letter of intent to divorce and I did not reply for it .what should I do now?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
As bad or hurtful as it may sound to you, you have simply thrown your life at the mercy of others. They have used you as a puppet only because you have given them permission to do so...past relationships and even now.
What you should do now is:
1. Ask an elder member (not your mother) of the family to intervene and talk to him and his side of the family to see if there is any scope for reconciliation. If there is, then your husband has got to stop playing these games of wanting you one day and then not wanting you the next. It's highly toxic to live with someone who trusts you for a moment and then asks you to prove your innocence the next moment. The two of you will need to get into Intensive Therapy as a couple to put things back together.
2. If there is no scope for reconciliation, please get a good lawyer who can secure the baby's future and yours.

Though you haven't asked me this, for your own good I suggest:
Please understand that no man is going to make you happy. So, depending on them despite the fact that can act toxic, is only draining you mentally and emotionally. Evaluate for yourself what you want from life besides being in relationships constantly. A break from it all will actually help you, you know. At least it will give you sense of how you can be by yourself and what you value the most in your life. Once you get past this stage, you will be stronger to draw boundaries and know how to enforce them. No one will be able to walk over you and you will be able to reclaim your identity.
You come first and your baby is going to need a strong mother raising them. So, step up NOW!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8304 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 22, 2025
Money
I have invested in Mutual Funds and Equities through two different service providers, namely ICICI Direct and a local CFA. Should I switch to local guy from ICICI Direct or continue as it is?
Ans: You are investing through two different channels: ICICI Direct and a local Certified Financial Planner.

It is good that you are now reviewing the quality of service and advice.

Being conscious about your financial journey is always a smart and responsible move.

Importance of Evaluating Investment Services Periodically

Financial services must always be reviewed on quality, advice approach, and alignment to goals.

No provider is automatically better or worse; your needs must be the centre of all evaluations.

Instead of shifting blindly, it is wise to take a step back and review carefully.

How You Can Do an Independent Homework Before Deciding

Please do a simple but very powerful homework before you take any action.

Analyse both ICICI Direct and the local Certified Financial Planner yourself.

Review both based on two very important parameters:

1. Process-Driven Approach

Does the provider first understand your life goals properly?

Is there a scientific process for assessing your risk profile?

Are they giving you a clear asset allocation plan?

Are they giving you a written financial plan or only transactions?

Do they review your portfolio yearly and rebalance it?

Are they proactive in tax planning and cash flow alignment?

2. Product Pushing Behaviour

Are you frequently suggested new schemes without proper need analysis?

Are there too many NFOs, IPOs, insurance products pushed without discussions?

Are changes in funds happening too often without strong logic?

Are charges and commissions explained transparently and openly?

Do you feel that more attention is given to selling than solving your needs?

You Must Compare Both Providers Under These Two Parameters

Please take a paper, draw two columns: ICICI Direct and Local CFP.

Under each parameter, score them based on your experience so far.

Be very honest and factual while scoring.

This exercise will give you surprising clarity on whom to continue with.

What You Should Finally Look For

Choose the one who is strongly process-driven and goals-focused.

Avoid continuing with anyone who is only product-pushing without holistic understanding.

Consistency of service, trustworthiness, and alignment to your goals are non-negotiable.

No Need to Rush to Shift Immediately

Even if you find one slightly better today, watch their behaviour for 3-6 months.

Good advice and bad advice both reveal themselves over a little time.

Take small but steady steps based on observation, not impulse.

Few More Key Points to Keep in Mind

Big brands or local players, both can be good or bad. Only process matters.

Wealth is built not by chasing returns but by disciplined financial planning.

The right advisor will stay with you across good and bad markets patiently.

Tax planning, risk management, and emotional discipline matter more than just fund selection.

Avoid frequent shifting between advisors; stability is very important in investments.

Practical Action Plan for You

Spend one peaceful evening doing this comparison yourself.

Talk to both ICICI Direct representative and local CFP separately.

Ask both about their investment process in detail.

Observe who speaks more about you and your goals versus who talks more about products.

Once you feel convinced, you can take a wise and confident decision.

Finally

Your investments must revolve around your goals, not around providers or platforms.

A process-oriented approach ensures your financial dreams become reality.

Product pushing without needs assessment damages financial health in long run.

You are the captain of your ship; choose your co-pilot carefully.

Spend quality time in evaluation; your wealth deserves thoughtful stewardship.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8304 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 28, 2025

Money
Hi I have invested about 16 lak in mirrae asset large and mid cap and current value is 21.5 lak , have stopped sip since a year. Pl advise is it advisable to keep the fund or to resume SIP or to switch other mirrae asset fund or to redem.
Ans: You have invested Rs 16 lakh in a large and mid-cap fund.

Your investment has grown to Rs 21.5 lakh.

You have stopped the SIP around a year back.

You are thinking whether to continue, switch, or redeem.

You have shown very good patience and investing discipline.

Performance Review of Your Fund

The fund has delivered good growth on your investment.

Large and mid-cap funds aim to balance growth and stability.

Such funds invest in top companies and emerging leaders.

Your corpus appreciation shows the fund has done its job well.

Impact of Stopping SIP

Stopping SIP one year back is fine if your goals were sorted.

SIPs help in rupee cost averaging over long term.

Not doing SIP for some time does not harm past investments.

Lump sum invested earlier will continue to remain invested.

Should You Redeem Now?

Redemption should be linked to goal, not just market levels.

If you need money in 1 to 2 years, you can plan phased redemption.

If you don’t need the money, stay invested for longer.

Equity gives best results when held for more than 7 years.

You have already shown good holding behaviour, keep it up.

Should You Switch to Another Fund?

Switching is advised only if fund consistently underperforms benchmark and peers.

In your case, since corpus grew well, no urgent switch is needed.

Large and mid-cap category remains a strong core holding option.

Instead of frequent fund changing, disciplined review is better.

Should You Restart SIP in Same Fund?

If your financial goals need more corpus, restarting SIP is good.

Same fund is fine if its management and strategy remain consistent.

Alternatively, you can diversify SIP into another flexi cap or large cap fund.

Diversification avoids dependence on a single fund.

Restarting SIP also brings back rupee cost averaging benefits.

Future Strategy for Your Investment

Continue holding your existing investment for wealth compounding.

Restart a SIP if your cash flows allow, linked to your goals.

Allocate new SIPs between existing fund and a second fund.

Review fund performance every 12 months for consistency.

When to Consider Partial Redemption

If your goal is due in next 2-3 years, start phased withdrawal.

Shift withdrawn amounts to debt or hybrid funds for capital protection.

Avoid full redemption at one time to save on taxes.

Mutual Fund Taxation Perspective

Selling units after 1 year counts as Long-Term Capital Gains.

Gains above Rs 1.25 lakh per year taxed at 12.5%.

If you redeem now, calculate gains and tax implications carefully.

Plan redemptions across financial years if possible to save tax.

Advantages of Staying Invested in Current Fund

Consistency helps compound returns effectively over time.

Large and mid-cap funds capture India's long-term growth story.

Switching funds frequently reduces overall return potential.

The fund manager expertise is already working for your money.

Disadvantages of Moving to Direct Funds

Direct plans leave you without Certified Financial Planner support.

Regular plans through MFD plus CFP guidance ensure better portfolio discipline.

Wrong direct investments can cause losses greater than saved commissions.

Personalised guidance adds huge value to your journey.

Drawbacks of Index Fund Investing

Index funds simply copy the index without active decision-making.

No flexibility to protect capital during market downturns.

Active funds adjust portfolio based on market outlooks.

Actively managed funds have consistently outperformed passive funds in India.

Certified Financial Planners prefer active funds for wealth-building goals.

When and How to Rebalance

Every year, check if fund is performing near its benchmark.

If underperformance persists for more than 2 years, think of switch.

Otherwise, stick to your plan for long-term wealth creation.

Rebalancing ensures you maintain your risk and return balance.

Risk Assessment for Future Planning

Large and mid-cap funds are moderately high-risk investments.

Your capacity to hold without panic during market fall is very important.

Avoid making emotional decisions during market volatility.

Asset Allocation Suggestion Going Ahead

Keep 70% to 75% exposure in equity mutual funds.

Allocate 20% to hybrid funds for goal nearing within 5 years.

Keep 5%-10% in short-term debt or liquid funds for immediate needs.

Importance of a Goal-Linked Strategy

Identify whether corpus is for home, retirement, or children education.

Each goal may need different asset allocation.

Planning goal-wise investment brings mental peace and better returns.

Reviewing Portfolio Annually

Check fund performance against benchmark and category average.

Adjust only if there is consistent underperformance.

Otherwise, let compounding continue peacefully.

Review with a Certified Financial Planner for best results.

Best Practices for Mutual Fund Investing

Remain invested through market ups and downs.

Avoid predicting market peaks or bottoms.

Step up SIPs yearly by 10% to counter inflation.

Link every investment to a goal for clarity and purpose.

Trust the long-term Indian economy and equity market story.

If You Have Any Insurance-Cum-Investment Plans

If you hold LIC, ULIP, or investment-cum-insurance policies, surrender them.

Reinvest maturity/surrender proceeds in mutual funds wisely.

Separate insurance and investment for better results.

Finally

Your growth from Rs 16 lakh to Rs 21.5 lakh shows smart investing.

Holding on patiently has rewarded you nicely.

No urgent need to redeem or switch from your current fund.

Restarting SIP in same or different fund can further strengthen your journey.

Plan all actions linked to your financial goals.

Avoid falling for direct plans or index funds without understanding the risks.

Trust the power of good mutual fund selection and professional advice.

Keep reviewing, stay patient, and wealth creation will happen naturally.

You are building a strong financial future with wise steps.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8304 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 28, 2025

Money
Hello sir I want to sip for 25k and lumsump of 5 lac Kindly suggest fund or portfolio This is for mf only , i have emergency fund and pf. Duration House build - 10yr Education for children 15y. Kindly help i can go for risk for small cap
Ans: You want to build a house in 10 years.

You are planning for children’s education over 15 years.

You have Rs 25000 monthly for SIP investment.

You also have Rs 5 lakh for lump sum investment.

Emergency fund and PF are already in place, which is excellent.

You are open to taking some risk with small cap exposure.

Your planning mindset and clarity about goals are very good.

Investment Time Horizon Understanding

10 years is a good time frame for house goal.

15 years is an ideal period for children’s education goal.

Equity mutual funds suit both goals because of long horizon.

Risk of equity reduces over long periods beyond 7 to 8 years.

You can build strong wealth with disciplined investing here.

Asset Allocation Strategy

Since goals are at least 10 years away, equity should dominate.

80% of your investments can be in equity mutual funds.

20% can be in hybrid or dynamic asset allocation funds.

This provides growth with some stability during market fluctuations.

Diversification Across Categories

Flexi cap funds should form the foundation of your portfolio.

Large and mid cap funds should add further balance.

Mid cap funds will provide good growth potential.

Small cap funds can be included but in limited portion only.

Hybrid funds will bring cushion in volatile periods.

Sectoral, thematic, gold, silver funds are not needed now.

Recommended Fund Categories

Two flexi cap funds from reputed fund houses.

One large and mid cap fund.

One mid cap fund.

One small cap fund for 10%-15% allocation.

One hybrid aggressive or balanced advantage fund.

Why Not Index Funds or ETFs

Index funds copy the index without trying to beat it.

Actively managed funds adjust portfolio according to market changes.

Active funds help protect downside and capture opportunities better.

Passive funds like ETFs face tracking errors and hidden expenses.

Certified Financial Planners recommend active funds for wealth creation.

Active funds have shown better long-term outperformance in India.

Why Avoid Direct Mutual Funds

Direct funds leave you alone for research, tracking, and reviews.

Regular plans through Certified Financial Planners offer expert guidance.

Regular plans ensure goal alignment and timely rebalancing.

Fees for regular plans are small compared to the professional support received.

Direct investing may save cost but can cause costly emotional mistakes.

Investing through an experienced CFP gives strong hand-holding in every market cycle.

Suggested Lump Sum Investment Allocation (Rs 5 lakh)

Rs 1.5 lakh in flexi cap fund 1.

Rs 1 lakh in flexi cap fund 2.

Rs 1 lakh in large and mid cap fund.

Rs 75,000 in mid cap fund.

Rs 50,000 in small cap fund.

Rs 25,000 in hybrid fund.

Suggested SIP Allocation (Rs 25000 monthly)

Rs 8000 in flexi cap fund 1.

Rs 6000 in flexi cap fund 2.

Rs 5000 in large and mid cap fund.

Rs 4000 in mid cap fund.

Rs 2000 in small cap fund.

Rs 1000 in hybrid fund.

Split Between Goals

House building goal (10 years): allocate 50% of the portfolio.

Children education goal (15 years): allocate 50% of the portfolio.

After 8 years, start shifting house goal money to hybrid funds.

For education goal, continue equity exposure till 13th year.

Then start gradual shifting to safer options in 14th and 15th year.

Risk Management Advice

Small cap funds are highly volatile but offer good long-term returns.

Limit small cap exposure to 10% to 15% of total corpus only.

Avoid investing more into small caps even if market looks attractive.

Stick to the allocation and review yearly with a Certified Financial Planner.

Importance of Goal Tracking

Set clear target amounts for house and education goals.

Check yearly whether you are on track or need step-up.

You may step up SIPs by 10% yearly to beat inflation.

Early detection of gaps helps you course-correct easily.

Review and Rebalancing Plan

Review your portfolio every 12 months.

Rebalance if any fund category goes out of set proportion.

Switch from equity to hybrid gradually when nearing goals.

Do not exit all equity at once to avoid sudden tax impact.

Plan systematic transfer strategy 2 years before goal maturity.

Mutual Fund Capital Gains Taxation Rules

Short-term gains (within 1 year) in equity are taxed at 20%.

Long-term gains above Rs 1.25 lakh per year are taxed at 12.5%.

Debt-oriented hybrid fund gains are taxed as per income slab.

Plan switches and withdrawals wisely to optimise tax liability.

Other Important Recommendations

Keep your emergency fund separate and untouched.

Keep health insurance and term insurance active for family security.

SIPs should be automated and consistent, ignoring short-term market noise.

Avoid panic or greed during market highs or lows.

Use surplus income or bonuses to increase SIPs towards your goals.

Work closely with a Certified Financial Planner to manage your journey.

Finally

You have taken a fantastic step by starting structured investing.

Clear goal setting with timelines shows your financial maturity.

Your risk readiness for small caps is understood and managed smartly.

A diversified portfolio across categories will protect and grow your wealth.

Avoid direct plans and passive funds for better performance and expert handholding.

Trust the power of SIPs, patience, and asset allocation.

Over 10 to 15 years, this discipline will bring strong financial freedom.

You are laying the right foundation for your house and children's education dreams.

Stay consistent, stay focused, and success will surely follow.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8304 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 28, 2025

Money
Hi , I have recently started investing in mutual funds. I have got following funds in my portfolio. I am 36 years old and I want to invest 30,000 per month and can step up 10% every year. I am looking at 15 years horizon for investment. Could you please tell me if my portfolio is diversified and how much should I invest in each fund and which fund should I stop? SBI Technology Opportunities Fund Direct-Growth, Nippon India Consumption Fund Direct-Growth, SBI Long Term Equity Fund Direct Plan-Growth, Quant ELSS Tax Saver Fund Direct-Growth, ICICI Prudential BHARAT 22 FOF Direct - Growth, Quant Infrastructure Fund Direct-Growth, UTI Gold ETF FoF Direct - Growth, ICICI Prudential Silver ETF FoF Direct - Growth, ICICI Prudential Nifty 50 Index Direct Plan-Growth Parag parikh flexi cap fund Motilal oswal midcap fund
Ans: You have included eleven different mutual fund schemes in your portfolio.

You are investing across sectoral, thematic, flexi cap, mid cap, ELSS, and ETF categories.

Your total monthly commitment is Rs 30000, with a step-up plan of 10% yearly.

Your investment horizon is 15 years, which is very healthy.

Your seriousness towards wealth building is highly appreciable.

Assessment of Asset Allocation

Your portfolio is heavily inclined towards sectoral and thematic funds.

Technology, consumption, infrastructure, gold, and silver sectors are present.

Sectoral funds are high-risk because they depend on specific industry performance.

Only a portion of the portfolio should be in sectoral or thematic funds.

Your flexi cap and mid cap funds provide broader market exposure.

Two ELSS funds are good but having two may cause duplication.

Diversification Analysis

Your portfolio is not adequately diversified across core categories.

Too many sector-specific and commodity funds add concentration risk.

Sectors like technology and consumption move in cycles and can underperform.

Commodities like gold and silver are for hedging, not for growth.

Overweight on thematic sectors reduces stability in market downturns.

Core diversification into flexi cap, large cap, and mid cap funds is missing.

Fund Selection Quality

The active equity funds chosen are from strong and reputed fund houses.

Actively managed funds give better long-term returns than passive funds.

Index funds and ETFs like Bharat 22 or Nifty 50 limit your fund manager’s skill.

Passive funds only copy the market without trying to outperform.

Active fund managers adjust portfolio based on opportunities and risks.

Hence, it is wise to prefer active funds over passive options for wealth creation.

ETFs and index funds can underperform due to tracking errors and expense ratio issues.

SIP Strategy Evaluation

Starting SIP of Rs 30000 monthly with a 10% step-up is excellent.

Over 15 years, this disciplined strategy can create substantial wealth.

SIP works best when continued across market ups and downs.

Step-up feature helps to fight inflation and grow corpus faster.

Continue SIP without worrying about short-term market movements.

Risk Assessment

Sectoral exposure increases your portfolio risk significantly.

Technology, infrastructure, consumption, gold, and silver move differently.

In bad cycles, sectoral funds can severely underperform.

Ideally, sectoral funds should not be more than 10-15% of the portfolio.

Your portfolio currently has 50% or more in sectors and commodities.

High sectoral exposure may cause unstable returns in some years.

Gaps or Missing Elements

You are missing sufficient exposure to large cap and multi cap funds.

Core portfolio should focus on broad market funds for better balance.

Only one mid cap and one flexi cap fund is not enough for stability.

You need to stop unnecessary sectoral and commodity funds.

Create a solid base with multi cap, flexi cap, and large cap oriented funds.

Then keep small satellite allocation to sectors for tactical advantage.

Taxation Impact

ELSS funds provide tax deduction under section 80C up to Rs 1.5 lakh.

But you do not need two ELSS funds; one is enough for tax planning.

Equity mutual fund taxation is now changed.

Short-term gains are taxed at 20% if sold before one year.

Long-term gains above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

Keep investments for more than one year to benefit from lower taxes.

Gold and silver ETFs are treated as debt funds.

Gains from gold and silver funds are taxed as per your income slab.

Importance of Investing Through Certified Financial Planner

Direct plans make you responsible for all research, tracking, and risk management.

A Certified Financial Planner adds immense value to your investment journey.

Regular plans through a trusted MFD offer yearly reviews, rebalancing, and advice.

Regular plans help avoid emotional mistakes during market volatility.

The very small additional cost is worth the professional expertise you receive.

Investing through a CFP ensures goal alignment, tax efficiency, and discipline.

Recommended Changes to Your Portfolio

Stop investments into technology sector fund immediately.

Stop investments into consumption theme fund immediately.

Stop investments into infrastructure sector fund immediately.

Stop investments into Bharat 22 ETF and Nifty 50 Index fund immediately.

Stop investments into gold and silver ETF funds immediately.

Retain one ELSS fund for your 80C tax saving needs.

Continue with your flexi cap fund investment.

Continue with your mid cap fund investment.

Add a large and mid cap fund to balance the portfolio.

Add another flexi cap fund or focused fund for broader coverage.

Keep sectoral exposure to maximum 10% combined if needed later.

Ideal Allocation Suggestion

40% in flexi cap funds.

30% in large and mid cap funds.

20% in mid cap funds.

10% optional tactical sector funds after one year of core stability.

For Rs 30000 monthly, you can split like this:

Rs 12000 in flexi cap funds

Rs 9000 in large and mid cap funds

Rs 6000 in mid cap funds

Rs 3000 in sector funds only if your risk appetite allows.

Review your allocation every year.

Additional Recommendations for Better Portfolio Health

Maintain an emergency fund for 6 months’ expenses separately.

Ensure you have pure term insurance cover based on your income and liabilities.

Create specific goals like retirement, children education, buying a house, etc.

Align investments to these goals for better discipline and motivation.

Step up your SIPs by 10% every year without fail.

Avoid timing the market or reacting to short-term volatility.

Invest with patience and stay focused on the 15-year horizon.

Work closely with a Certified Financial Planner for yearly reviews.

Finally

You have taken a wonderful step towards wealth creation at age 36.

SIP with a step-up strategy and 15 years horizon is powerful.

Portfolio needs urgent streamlining to avoid high sector concentration.

Focus on broad diversified funds instead of sectoral or commodity themes.

Stick to active fund management rather than index or ETF strategies.

Use the services of a Certified Financial Planner for hand-holding and expert advice.

Keep your investments goal-based and not market-news-based.

Build an emergency fund separately to safeguard your investments.

Gradually step-up SIPs to match inflation and rising goals.

Be patient, disciplined, and committed for next 15 years.

You are well on your way towards strong financial independence!

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8304 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 28, 2025

Money
pl see my mf portfolio and advise, icici bluechip fund rs 5000/- parag flexi cap rs 5000/-, hdfc flexi cap rs 5000/-,m/o large and mid cap rs 5000/- and nippon india small cap rs 5000/-(all sip monthly )
Ans: You have selected five different mutual fund schemes.

Your SIP contribution is Rs 5000 each in all five funds.

Your total monthly SIP is Rs 25000.

Your portfolio is a mix of large cap, flexi cap, large and mid cap, and small cap funds.

This shows a healthy diversification across market capitalisations.

You have chosen a good combination of growth-oriented equity categories.

Very thoughtful and appreciable planning is visible in your fund selection.

Assessment of Asset Allocation

Your portfolio has strong exposure to large caps through the bluechip fund.

Large cap funds are generally more stable and less volatile.

Flexi cap funds offer diversification across large, mid, and small companies.

Large and mid cap category bridges the gap between stability and higher growth.

Small cap exposure can give potential high returns over the long term.

Small caps are risky but rewarding if you stay invested patiently.

Your asset allocation is balanced towards growth with moderate risk.

Diversification Analysis

You are spreading investments across different market segments.

This is a smart way to balance risk and reward.

You are not overexposed to a single market capitalisation.

Flexi cap funds automatically adjust between different sizes based on opportunities.

It reduces your need to constantly track and rebalance.

Your approach reflects a strong understanding of portfolio construction.

This will help during different market cycles.

Fund Selection Quality

All selected funds belong to reputed fund houses.

Fund houses with a strong track record are always preferable.

The selected schemes are managed by experienced fund managers.

Experienced fund managers can navigate market volatility better.

Your selection of actively managed funds is excellent.

Actively managed funds outperform index funds in India due to inefficiencies.

Index funds often just mirror the market and do not beat it.

Active funds can take advantage of opportunities and protect against downturns.

Hence your preference towards active management is well appreciated.

SIP Strategy Evaluation

You are investing Rs 25000 monthly, which is Rs 3 lakh annually.

SIP method is highly beneficial as it averages cost across market ups and downs.

SIPs encourage disciplined investing without timing the market.

Your regular SIPs will help you build substantial wealth over the years.

Continuation of SIP during market corrections will add great advantage.

You are on the right track with your consistent approach.

Risk Assessment

Small cap funds bring higher risk but also higher potential returns.

Small caps are volatile in the short term but rewarding over 7 to 10 years.

Your portfolio has limited exposure to small caps, which is prudent.

Majority of your investments are in large and flexi cap categories.

This keeps your portfolio volatility under control.

Your risk appetite seems suitable for the portfolio you have built.

Gaps or Missing Elements

One point to highlight is sector diversification within funds.

Most flexi caps and large-mid caps internally manage sector exposure.

You need not add more sector-specific funds to this portfolio.

You have rightly avoided thematic or sectoral funds which are risky.

Global diversification is missing but optional depending on your goals.

For now, it is acceptable to focus on Indian growth story.

Taxation Impact

Equity mutual fund taxation needs careful understanding.

Short-term capital gains within one year are taxed at 20%.

Long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

If you redeem after one year, you benefit from long-term tax rates.

Keep this taxation aspect in mind while planning redemptions.

SIP units are treated separately for tax based on their holding period.

Sustainability and Future Readiness

Your SIP amount of Rs 25000 monthly is good but review it yearly.

As your income or savings increase, step-up your SIP amount.

Step-up SIPs ensure that your investments match inflation and life goals.

Monitor fund performance once a year but do not churn frequently.

Give your funds enough time to perform over complete market cycles.

Importance of Investing Through Certified Financial Planner

Regular plans through MFDs with CFPs add tremendous value.

Direct plans require you to do all research, monitoring, and rebalancing.

Regular plans offer expert advice, portfolio reviews, and emotional counselling.

Investors often make mistakes like selling during market falls without guidance.

CFPs ensure discipline, goal mapping, risk profiling, and tax efficiency.

The additional cost of regular plans is very minimal compared to the benefits.

You have made the right decision to invest through an expert channel.

Additional Recommendations for Better Portfolio Health

Maintain an emergency fund separately in liquid funds or savings account.

Emergency fund should be at least six months of monthly expenses.

This ensures that SIPs are not interrupted due to cash flow issues.

Continue SIPs even during market downturns without stopping.

Avoid booking profits too early from equity funds.

Rebalancing can be done once a year to maintain original allocation.

Review your financial goals annually and align investments accordingly.

Insure yourself adequately with pure term insurance, if not already done.

Avoid mixing insurance and investments like ULIPs or endowment plans.

Final Insights

Your mutual fund portfolio is well designed with a good mix.

You have selected quality funds across different market capitalisations.

SIP mode is the right approach for steady wealth creation.

Active fund selection gives you better potential than passive index investing.

Your risk profile matches your current portfolio.

Regular monitoring with the help of a Certified Financial Planner is key.

Stay invested with patience and discipline for long-term success.

Avoid unnecessary changes based on short-term market movements.

Increase SIP amount gradually in line with income growth.

Keep separate provisions for emergencies, insurance, and short-term needs.

You are on a solid path towards achieving your financial goals.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Dr Nagarajan Jsk

Dr Nagarajan Jsk   |351 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Apr 28, 2025

Career
Hello sir .I attempted neet 3times in 2022 I scored 605,then 585 in 2023 then I joined bsc Life science and again prepared scored 652 in 2024 but due to scam everything messed up I was not attending my bsc classes from sem-2 which gave me a back .clg told me to re enroll as ex student but I thought to give neet once again.Intially I didn't knew that the spark has left I was tired .Now I don't have confidence though I am studying but I don't have that spark I used to have .What should I do sir plz help me out . My mother told me to prepare for some other government job exams if I didn't get selected this year .plz help
Ans: Hi Abilasha,

A score of 652 in NEET is no joke. Have you checked what went wrong in that exam? Analyzing your performance is essential.

I think you may not have had the moral support you needed, which is why you chose to pursue a BSc. It’s challenging to juggle multiple tasks, such as preparing for NEET while attending a regular course. Nowadays, there are many distractions like friends and social media, not to mention the plethora of advice and predictions from the media that can feel overwhelming. There isn't a one-size-fits-all solution; it varies from person to person. We humans are unique and shouldn't simply follow what others say.

Your goal is to become a physician, and that should be your main focus. I noticed that you didn’t mention which specialization you chose for your BSc. If you had selected subjects related to NEET—like Chemistry, Biology, and Physics—you could have focused on them without needing to study the same topics separately and could have dedicated more time to the other subjects.

In recent years, we have started to encounter these kinds of entrance exams and experiences, and we still need to go through exit exams.

So, don't let anything worry you. Focus on one task at a time and complete it. I believe you are capable of accomplishing your goal this year.

ALL THE BEST.
For any further questions, please feel free to ask.
POOCHO. LIFE CHANGE KARO.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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