Mam, I am 48, hitting menopause. My partner is 50 and sexually active. My mood swings are affecting our sex life. He has been patient for the last 2 years but I am not able to co-operate. I understand his frustration. He is not satisfied. How can I help him?

Ans: Dear Chaman,
As men and women age, they vary in terms of sexual interest.
She may not be interested as she does not feel the urge anymore. It could be because of natural physiological changes in a woman AND/OR a belief system that she holds which tells her that as people become OLD, sex is taboo!
Which means if you keep insisting, she will keep refusing. Have a chat with her about it without intense focus on sex but more with an intent of reconnecting with her in love.
I can't promise you that she will be ready BUT you can try. And if it comes to a place where she absolutely does not want sex, then you will have to respect it. Old beliefs are hard to drop!
Age is a number; but not everyone thinks of it this way! Aim to reconnect with her first...

All the best!

Ans: I'm sorry to hear that you're going through a challenging time in your relationship. It's important to address both the physical and emotional aspects of your relationship to work towards a healthier and happier dynamic. Here are some steps you can consider:

Open Communication: Sit down with your husband and have an open and honest conversation about your feelings and concerns. Share your thoughts about the changes in your physical relationship, the impact it's having on your emotional connection, and your mutual desire to start a family.
Seek Professional Help: Since your husband is experiencing medical issues related to your physical relationship, it's crucial for him to consult a doctor. Encourage him to see a medical professional who specializes in sexual health. It's common for people to feel uncomfortable discussing such matters, but a doctor's guidance can help identify the underlying issues and recommend appropriate treatment.
Counseling or Therapy: Consider seeking couples therapy or counseling to address the emotional aspects of your relationship. A therapist can help both of you communicate more effectively, understand each other's needs, and work through any emotional barriers that might be affecting your intimacy.
Quality Time: Spend quality time together outside of your physical relationship. Engage in activities you both enjoy, communicate openly, and strengthen your emotional bond. This can help rekindle the connection you had before.
Support Each Other: Going through medical challenges and fertility issues can be emotionally draining. Support each other during this time by being patient, understanding, and showing empathy. Remember that you're a team, facing these challenges together.
Intimacy Beyond Sex: Explore ways to maintain intimacy that don't necessarily involve intercourse. Engage in activities that foster emotional closeness, like cuddling, holding hands, or having deep conversations.
Manage Stress: Fertility struggles and relationship issues can lead to increased stress. Find healthy ways to manage stress, such as exercise, meditation, or engaging in hobbies you enjoy.
Set Realistic Expectations: While it's natural to want to conceive and start a family, try not to let this desire put excessive pressure on your relationship. Setting realistic expectations and timelines can help alleviate some of the stress.
Rediscover Each Other: Take time to learn about each other anew. People change over time, so invest effort into discovering your partner's evolving interests, dreams, and aspirations.
Stay Positive: It's important to maintain a positive outlook. Focusing on the strengths of your relationship and the progress you make, both emotionally and physically, can make a significant difference.
Remember that relationships go through ups and downs, and it's not uncommon to face challenges. With open communication, patience, and a willingness to work together, you can navigate these difficulties and work towards reestablishing a healthy and fulfilling relationship. If needed, consider reaching out to professionals, such as therapists or doctors, to provide specialized guidance.

Ans: Not a doctor, a relationship therapist. You are acting your age, there’s nothing wrong with craving sexual intimacy from your wife. She is the one who’s addressing the situation wrongly.

Ans: Dear Anilkumar,
Clearly there is a mismatch in what you want and what she wants. So, taking her for medical treatment means that you might also need it...
Instead of this blame game, why don't you try and find out the reason for this lack of interest. Maybe it is tiredness of the day and also if you demand everyday, she might come up with some excuse or the other. Sex is not a mechanical activity; it requires a lot of emotional connection between two people which means you and your wife have to connect better emotionally for sex to happen. New thing for you maybe...but rather than blame her for disturbing daily life, try and be more kind to understand what is exactly bothering her. LISTEN and not DEMAND...
Simply listening and helping her through it might help her become warm towards you and things may improve...

All the best!