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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 19, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - May 12, 2025
Relationship

I am a 41 yr old man. Married for the last 17 yrs, my wife is now 37 yrs old. w are Bengalis but now due t my work stay in Bengaluru. we had an arranged marriage but soon after the marriage I found her to be very irresponsible, she had the mentality that her husband has to be responsible for all her whims & fancies without any expectation from her. Though her family was more like ours middle class & financially poorer then us Initially I thought that she will mature with time. Within 1 yr we had our 1st kid who is 16 yrs old & in 11th now. Thinking she will now be responsible as mother but found very little change & I had to force/push her to do maternal duties while I managed the other things despite myself working as an engineer in an mnc & she being a housewife. next year we had our 2nd kid. This pressure was reflected in my office & my performance suffered, anyway I managed to stay afloat. Giving her any family task always resulted in her doing a coverup job & when things went wrong I had to set it right as the family or there will be monetary loss. Obviously I used to tell her about all this, then she will be OK for 1-2 weeks then again back to same. Even taking care of the children there studies soon became my responsibility. One thing was good was our sexual life which what I understand she is good & this gave me somewhat something to bear her Though other factor like middle class mentality that parents should not move out for the kids sake kept me somewhat tied to her & tried to make myself happy.Last year around June she told me that she will like to leave me as she wants to marry one of her telegu friend's brother who works in Dubai now, given my above reason I was not very upset on hearing this but was worried about our kids the eldest then gave his 10th exam & younger was promoted to class 10. After some talks & persuasion she agreed that she will wait for 3 yrs ie the younger kid to complete her schooling & going to college, & also keep the whole things secret with only 4-5 people knowing it, this she has responsibly done. Now its 1 year & I am in a very bad situation & need your support first she is now completely without any responsibility of the kids or family, she just cooks the meals sees that the maids work & even if I tell her to look into what the kids are studying or take the small responsibility like waking them up or minor things like go to the shop etc , she simply declines & always she is busy browsing or chatting, in Feb her to be husband came to Bangalore & she spend 2 nights with him in a resort. I did not want the kids to know about all this as it will mentally disturb them so I had to make stories to them about there mom going to a friend's marriage etc. He is again coming in mid July & they are planning to go out again.. My delima is I can bear the whole thing with a glimmer of hope that our separation maybe avoided which makes a somewhat social negativeness for me my parents & my kids but am I doing the right thing or being desperate is what I should be? The second point is something which I am feeling very uneasy to write, though we have decided to separate & she is having sex with this guy but we are still have sex, I dont want to really worry that she having sex with me is cheating with her to be husband but as I told you before it is really relaxing & gives me the strength to bear all this... Please suggest what I should do, immediately leave her which will end the story though I am not really ready if I & the kids will be able to take the social slur or wait for another 2 years with the hope that maybe things will change

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What are you hanging around for? She's clearly move on...
You are perhaps citing the excuse of children and hoping that something would turn around. In fact, a dysfunctional environment affects children more than the truth.
So, take a decision that you feel will keep your children protected emotionally and physically. And most importantly, what makes you want to continue punishing yourself like this?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 17, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 11, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Anu, I am working in a central psu and my wife works for state govt and both are 48 yrs. We are married for 20 yrs and have 2 sons (20 &16). She is never expressive nor vocal, because of this our marital relationship have not seen even a single day of happiness. Her parents never ever made her realised that problem can be from her side too nor asked me even a single time whats is bothering me. She is over ambitious in her job and neglects everything in the personal life. This negligence started from the day 1 of the married life. She never try to understand the problem and reasons behind and just ignore and move ahead. This makes life miserable and likewise 20 yrs passed.. Its like when sons are moving out of home, I feel very much alone and sometimes feels to runaway from life...She dont show any emotions, giving the reasons that its her nature...She says loves me, but whats that love which is not felt by me for a single day...I wanted a wife not a nurse.. What to do....I lost my hope of life.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am sure there is an issue that you are facing BUT to generalize it as: because of this our marital relationship have not seen even a single day of happiness.
Are you sure that has not been a single day or a single moment of feeling some joy? DO NOT indulge in this kind of belief as it only makes the issue look bigger than what it maybe.
If you feel alone, talk to her and tell her exactly how you feel. It's your marriage as well; do something to stay in it.
If there is a reason for her to be the way that she is, that needs to be addressed. Also, by complaining rather than facing the issue together, you are alienating yourself from the marriage. Give this a fair chance and deal with it in a mature way. Talking about it helps more than complaining; as she will bring her list of complaints and then it just gets into a loop.
- have an honest conversation
- make space for a back and forth conversation
If she refuses to talk, then possibly there is a need for a professional to intervene. She will also need to understand what hurts you and work on it, so that the marriage moves on smoothly. Marriage is a two-way dance.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 04, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 01, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Anu Its been 2 years since I got married and hv a 2 month old son. My wife is a qualified engineer and I am a consultant. My wife is showing hatred and anger towards my mom and dad. She thinks that they pampering me unnecessarily since me being a single child. Also we had a plan to settle down in abroad and started working towards that plan since marriage. Because of this we failed to understand ourselves both physically and mentally. My wife got admission masters degree in foreign university which she refused to go because we did not get physically intimate then. Also she tried pursuing the masters course from online thus quitting her job. So I started trying to go and settle in abroad meanwhile concentrating on intimacy as well. But in this process she understood that she loves her work more than anything else.Thus she rejoined her job again to another department with which she did not get the job satisfaction In the course of time, i got a job offer abroad to a different country other than the one we targeted. My wife is now blaming me that i was responsible for all the mess that happened inher life. She thinks that i cunningly used her to fullfill my abroad dreams. Also since ours was a arranged marriage , i could not develop any feelings for her as she is very average looking at the beginning and now since she is showing hatred towards me and my parents , unnecessary divorse thoughts are peeping up. Please help
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I see a few gaps in what you have shared which simply means more information is needed from you.
- She refused to go abroad, then she suddenly loved her work more and then started working again and then traveled abroad for it?

You see the gap?
How is that since you both were not physically intimate, she had decided not to pursue her Masters abroad?
What made her suddenly love her work more?
Why does she blame you when as you say that she loves her job but she is not satisfied with it?
What makes her feel that you cunningly used her to move abroad?
Also, what is the reason that she thinks that you are being pampered by your parents?

Once you have answers to these, the problem will emerge more clearly, and that will help in finding a solution to it as well.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 31, 2024Hindi
Relationship
Hi Anu, this is Rajkiran here, I am 34 years old I have been married 4 years back to a girl through the relatives reference. My wife is govt worker and she only has one independent parent which is her mother. The marriage happened in a very short time during corona period and we had healthy few chats of how we expect our life's to be and we were both in common understanding and when I asked what is her expectations then she said she had no expectations at all and go by how life takes on. I was happy that I got right match and I am person not into any relationships and nothing and this marriage relationship was so new and started loving her more and she was also the same. She had also no relationships and not interested in marriage but due to her mother's pressure she got married to me. She also started liking the relationship and valuing it After 6 months she was pregnant and she went to her mom's house to stay as she was feeling comfortable there and I aslo let her stay as she wishes. Child was born in 2022 April and problem started here We had to name the child and it's usually dad who names the child because its family tree and decendent. But my wife got in middle and said she wants name as suggested by her mother, the first fight started and later i compromised for child sake and I agreed to her on the naming of child. After the naming ceremony done her mother acted differently to me and she was looking for fight, my wife was also on the same route they were allowing me see my child once in a month and she also did not bother to spend time and let child because with me. I love to be with child but unfortunately I am not able to spend time with him. This made me feel suffocating inside and was feeling bad, one day we planned to bring child to my home along with my wife and she also agreed to stay for 3days and for some reason child was crying as it was new to adapt and new people. My wife used the situation to pull a fight with me and she said I want to go home saying child is crying and he will fall sick. I requested to wait for another few hours if he calms down and we will see but she didn't listen and got very pissed off and had cold war with her for week. She stopped talking and she stopped everything. I had no idea what was so wrong that I did and it so bad. I tired always to talk to her and she didn't give space to me and my feelings. From September 2022 we were not together till now. I December 2022 I approached marriage counselling for her and me to unite with her, she also had come for counseling as it was religious institution and she had no option to opt out. Counselling was done and she told that she will be coming my house in a Weeks time. After a week again same story she didnt turn back and she didnt even want to put one step to solve issue, adament nature and influence of her mother. I waited for a year and approached legally by filing petition on restitution of conjugal rights. I went through 2 hearings she is not turning back. I am left no where and for this sake why I should have married. I don't want another marriage or any i have great love for my child and even my wife whatso ever she does i just love her.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There are a few individuals on Earth who sadly fail to see the larger picture; in your case your wife fails to see how marriage can bring stability to life and the child's growth.
Now why she wants to run back to her parents' place is something I don't understand BUT she surely has forgotten that making a marriage work means staying together and even if the two of you need to stay apart, it has to be due to work or other commitments that require that kind of an adjustment.
Do you know why she is so quick to run back to her family home? Even if she was pressured in marrying you, what's the point running away from what is obvious.
If you are sure about not wanting the marriage, kindly factor in that you have a child. Make an attempt to get back together, so that your child has a stable home. Request an elder member from your family to intervene and talk some sense into her mother who seems to be ignorant to the fact of ruining her daughter's life. Is her mother going to take on the responsibility of her daughter and her child? See where this line of action leads you to and then step in and appeal with your wife...This is all that you can do...Hope for the best thing to happen...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 12, 2024Hindi
Relationship
Hi Anu, I am 44 years old married Man with a 16 year old son. We had a love marriage, and I met my wife in college. She was beautiful when she was 18 and beyond gorgeous at 44 and has a very loving nature. She has attracted attention from young and old all her life and I know she would continue to do so. I also had the looks and charisma to woo a girl once upon a time, but years of work and family stress had made me an average middle-aged man. Around a year after our marriage, my wife had her first affair with a coworker, which I could find out immediately as in those days we used to have a common phone. She apologized and I forgot about it and never tried to dig deep into it. I later learnt she had developed a liking for a second coworker within a year (After I dig into the things that have happened to me over last 4-5 years). I still do not know if she had a second affair at that point of time, but she was in touch with that guy through messages and video calls till 2020. Our child was born 3 years after our marriage and for few years we had a harmonious relationship although we had our ups and downs. It was early in my career and I had taken a challenging job profile, where I was required to work for 10-12 hours on regular basis. I was there for her when she required but I was not omnipresent. There were times, when I neglected her as I was busy with my career. In addition, I slowly got more attached to my son, who was growing up and taking all the attention at home. In our relationship only she was complaining all the time and I simply kept doing things to please her. I wanted her to be independent and explore the world but residing under a same roof and raising the family and also allow me to achieve my career goals and fulfill the responsibilities of a Son. In between all these, we started to drift apart. Drifting apart didn’t mean we didn’t have sex or we became a non-functional family. We did have regular good sex 7 to 10 days apart and we travelled a lot together all these years as a happy family. Even after her known past affair, I never doubted on her integrity when she used to talk with her male friends/Office colleagues with doors closed. I got the first shock in our relationship, when she declined to move with me when I was transferred to a new location. I pleaded her to come with me as the location was on another corner of the country and it would not be possible for me to come and meet them even once in a month. But she didn’t agree. But God had other plans and after 2 years of living alone COVID stuck. During this period of uncertainty, she reluctantly agreed to move in with me. After I brought them with me, she kept avoiding me. She slept in a separate room and did not allow any kind of physical intimacy. This continued for about 4 months and then it stuck my mind :- Is she having an affair? One night I scanned all her call records, her facebook etc and I was devasted by what I found. She was having an affair with a guy who 12 years her junior and multiple hook-ups with others. When confronted she assured me she will end this but me and my Son caught her multiple times over the last 4 years even after the guy got married and relocated to another country. The last discovery was ugly as we had just come back from a vacation and my son just happen to find some obscene pictures of his mom sent to her married boyfriend. Even after all these, I try to remain calm most of the time as I did not want to disturb the peace of my home as my son is in most critical phase of his carrier. Over last 4 years, I did my part to become a better husband:- by giving her more time to understand her better, tried to listen to her, fulfilling all her wishes, help her in household chores, set her up in a new job etc. As on today, I have access to her phone, her email etc. Sometimes I feel I have made progress, but when it comes to bed, it all comes to naught. She’s really not the women I fell in love with. Over the years she has become very manipulative and secretive. She showers me with fake love to keep the family life going. She is otherwise a very dedicated Mother and takes good care of the house. There is no real love, no passion. When I question her, she asks me to go find love somewhere else. I think she has checked herself out of this relationship mentally quite sometime ago. I wonder how long I can handle this rejection on day to day basis. I still want to save this marriage where there is true spouse love. Do I stand a chance. - Anonymous
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You should know by now that your wife has mentally checked out of the relationship. Yes, pieces and parts of her still linger around the family BUT how truly is she committed? Rather than skirting around the issue like the way it has been happening, why don't the two of you actually have an honest conversation about it?
There's a reason why she finds connecting with people outside of marriage rather actually share that emotional and physical space with you. Do you both not want to work on this and come to some sort of a conclusion here?
At least then you will know if there is any scope for reconciliation or things have gotten worse.
Having her phone and monitoring her, has it changed what she does? This is just keeping you and your son on the edge and I believe each of us is entitled to some peace in our lives, right?
So, now talk together and with one another...Know what she wants and clearly state what you want and then see for yourself where all this is leading to...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10899 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 17, 2025

Money
Hi, I am 32 years old, married, and have a 4-year-old daughter. My monthly take-home salary is 55,000 rupees, and my wife's salary is 31,000 rupees, making our total income 86,000 rupees. I am currently in a lot of debt. Our total EMIs amount to 99,910 rupees (total loans with an average interest rate of 12.5%), and even with my father covering most of the monthly expenses, I still spend about 10,000 rupees. This leaves me with a shortage of approximately 25,000 rupees (debt) every month. My total debt across various banks is 36,50,000 rupees, and I also have a gold loan of 14 lakhs. I cannot change the EMI or loan tenure for another year. I also have a 2 lakh rupee loan from private lenders at an 18% interest rate. My total debt is over 52 lakhs. Now, with gold and silver prices rising, I'm worried that I won't be able to buy them again. I have an opportunity to get a 2 lakh rupee loan at a 12% interest rate, and I'm thinking of using that money to buy gold and silver and then pledge them at the bank again. Half of my current gold loan is from a similar situation – I took a loan from private lenders, bought gold, and then took a gold loan from the bank to repay the private loan. Given my current situation and my family's circumstances, should I buy more gold or focus on repaying my debts? What should I do? The monthly interest on my loans is approximately 50,000 rupees, meaning 50,000 rupees of my salary goes towards interest every month. What should I do in this situation? I also have an SBI Jan Nivesh SIP of 2000 rupees per month for the last four months. I have no savings left. I am thinking of taking out term insurance and health insurance, but I am hesitating because I don't have the money. I am looking for some suggestions to get out of these debts.
Ans: Your honesty and clarity deserve appreciation.
You have explained everything openly.
That itself shows responsibility and courage.
Your concern for family security is clear.
This situation is stressful but not hopeless.

» Current Financial Snapshot
– You are 32 years old.
– Married with a young daughter.
– Family income is Rs 86,000 monthly.
– Total EMIs exceed total income.
– Monthly deficit exists every month.

» Debt Position Reality
– Total loans exceed Rs 52 lakhs.
– Multiple banks and lenders involved.
– Average interest is very high.
– Private lender interest is dangerous.
– Gold loan exposure is large.

» Cash Flow Mismatch
– Monthly EMIs are around Rs 1 lakh.
– Monthly income is only Rs 86,000.
– Father supports household expenses.
– Still a monthly shortage exists.
– This gap is unsustainable long term.

» Interest Drain Assessment
– Around Rs 50,000 goes as interest monthly.
– Interest gives zero future benefit.
– Half your income is lost to interest.
– This is the core problem.
– Capital is not reducing meaningfully.

» Gold Purchase Thought Analysis
– Fear of rising gold prices is natural.
– Emotional thinking is influencing decisions.
– Buying gold using loans is risky.
– Pledging gold increases debt cycle.
– This strategy already created stress earlier.

» Gold Loan Trap Explanation
– Buying gold using borrowed money is leverage.
– Leverage increases risk in personal finance.
– Gold does not generate income.
– Loan interest keeps accumulating.
– Emotional comfort hides financial damage.

» Clear Answer on Gold Buying
– Do not buy more gold now.
– Do not take fresh loans for gold.
– This will worsen debt burden.
– Price rise fear should be ignored.
– Survival is more important than assets.

» Priority Reset Required
– Debt freedom comes before investments.
– Cash flow stability comes before wealth.
– Insurance comes before gold.
– Family safety comes before emotions.
– Discipline is needed now.

» Private Lender Loan Danger
– 18 percent interest is destructive.
– This loan must be closed first.
– It gives no flexibility.
– It increases stress constantly.
– It affects mental health also.

» Strategy for Private Loan
– Use any possible support to close it.
– Ask family help if possible.
– Sell unused items if required.
– Temporary embarrassment is better than long stress.
– Closing this gives immediate relief.

» Gold Loan Strategy
– Do not increase gold loan amount.
– Avoid rollover behaviour.
– Use bonuses or gifts to reduce principal.
– Do not top up gold loans.
– Reduce dependency gradually.

» Bank Loan Lock Period Reality
– You cannot restructure for one year.
– This period must be survived carefully.
– No new liabilities should be added.
– Expenses must stay minimal.
– Emotional spending must stop.

» Expense Control Measures
– Track every rupee monthly.
– Avoid eating outside.
– Avoid subscriptions and upgrades.
– Delay lifestyle expenses fully.
– Treat this as recovery phase.

» Role of Father’s Support
– Parental support is a blessing.
– Use this support wisely.
– Do not misuse the relief.
– Focus on debt reduction.
– This support is temporary.

» SIP Investment Assessment
– SIP of Rs 2,000 is symbolic.
– It gives psychological comfort only.
– It does not change financial position.
– Debt interest is much higher.
– Pause SIP temporarily if needed.

» Investment Versus Debt Reality
– Paying debt gives guaranteed returns.
– Interest saved equals investment gain.
– No mutual fund can beat 18 percent interest.
– Debt repayment is priority investment now.
– Wealth creation starts after stability.

» Insurance Hesitation Reality
– Term insurance is not optional.
– Health insurance is essential.
– One medical emergency will destroy finances.
– Insurance prevents future debt.
– Low premium options exist.

» Insurance Action Plan
– Take basic term insurance immediately.
– Take basic family health insurance.
– Choose lowest premium coverage.
– Avoid investment linked policies.
– Protection matters more than returns.

» Child Responsibility Perspective
– Your daughter depends fully on you.
– Her education needs future planning.
– But first ensure family survival.
– Debt stress affects parenting quality.
– Stability helps emotional health.

» Psychological Pressure Management
– Fear is driving wrong decisions.
– Gold fear is emotional.
– Loan fear is real.
– Focus on controllable actions.
– Ignore market noise completely.

» What Not To Do Now
– Do not take new loans.
– Do not buy gold or silver.
– Do not lend money to anyone.
– Do not chase investments.
– Do not hide problems.

» What To Do Immediately
– List all loans clearly.
– Mark highest interest loans.
– Target private lender loan first.
– Reduce any discretionary spending.
– Communicate with family honestly.

» One Year Survival Plan
– Focus on EMI discipline.
– Avoid defaults at all costs.
– Build small emergency buffer slowly.
– Accept temporary discomfort.
– One year will change options.

» After One Year Options
– Approach banks for restructuring.
– Request tenure extension.
– Reduce EMI burden.
– Consolidate loans if possible.
– Negotiate interest rates.

» Long Term Recovery Vision
– Debt free life is possible.
– Income will increase with experience.
– Expenses will stabilise.
– This phase will pass.
– Discipline will shape your future.

» Emotional Bond With Gold
– Gold feels like safety.
– But debt is unsafe.
– True security is cash flow.
– True wealth is peace.
– True protection is insurance.

» Family Communication Importance
– Discuss openly with your wife.
– Take joint decisions.
– Avoid blame or guilt.
– Team effort reduces stress.
– You are partners.

» Self Worth Reminder
– Debt does not define character.
– Mistakes happen in life.
– Learning matters more.
– You are responsible and aware.
– That is strength.

» Final Insights
– Do not buy gold now.
– Do not take new loans.
– Focus fully on debt reduction.
– Close private lender loan first.
– Take basic term and health insurance.
– Pause investments if required.
– Control expenses strictly.
– Survive one year patiently.
– Stability will return gradually.
– Your situation is difficult but solvable.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10899 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 17, 2025

Money
FINANANCE MINISTER SAYS INDIAN ECONMY IS WELL DEVELOPMENT, EVEN GDP ASLO GROW, THEN WHY SENSEX AND NIFTY NOT INCREASE LAST 15 MONTH?
Ans: Your question shows awareness and maturity.
Many investors think the same way.
Your doubt is valid and practical.
Markets confuse even experienced people.
Let us understand this calmly.

» Economy Growth And Market Movement
– Economy and stock markets are different.
– GDP measures production and services.
– Stock markets measure company profits.
– Both move on different timelines.
– Both react to different triggers.

» What GDP Growth Really Means
– GDP shows overall economic activity.
– It includes government spending.
– It includes consumption and exports.
– It includes informal sectors also.
– Stock markets do not track all these.

» Stock Markets Track Corporate Earnings
– Markets look at listed company profits.
– Only limited companies are listed.
– Many growing sectors are unlisted.
– GDP growth may not reach listed firms.
– Hence market movement differs.

» Timing Difference Between GDP And Markets
– GDP is backward looking data.
– It shows past quarter performance.
– Markets are forward looking.
– Markets price future expectations.
– Expectations may already be priced.

» Valuations Were Already High
– Markets rallied strongly earlier.
– Many stocks became expensive.
– High valuation limits future returns.
– Good news was already discounted.
– Hence sideways movement happened.

» Interest Rates Impact Markets
– Global interest rates increased sharply.
– Higher rates reduce company profits.
– Borrowing becomes costly for businesses.
– Investors prefer safer instruments.
– Equity demand reduces temporarily.

» Global Factors Affect Indian Markets
– Indian markets are not isolated.
– Global fund flows matter.
– Foreign investors moved money out.
– Global uncertainty affects sentiments.
– Markets respond instantly to this.

» Inflation Pressure On Companies
– Inflation increased input costs.
– Raw material prices rose.
– Profit margins got squeezed.
– Revenue growth did not convert to profits.
– Markets react to profit margins.

» Consumption Growth Is Uneven
– Rural demand stayed weak.
– Urban demand was selective.
– Not all sectors benefited equally.
– Some companies struggled to grow.
– Index reflects this mixed picture.

» Government Spending Versus Private Profits
– GDP growth had government support.
– Infrastructure spending boosted numbers.
– Private companies may not benefit immediately.
– Profits lag behind spending.
– Markets wait for confirmation.

» Index Structure Matters
– Sensex and Nifty have limited stocks.
– Heavy weight stocks dominate movement.
– If few large stocks stagnate, index stagnates.
– Many small companies may still grow.
– Index hides internal action.

» Banking And Financial Sector Impact
– Banks carry heavy index weight.
– Credit growth faced challenges.
– Asset quality concerns existed.
– Margin pressure impacted profitability.
– Index movement slowed due to banks.

» IT Sector Headwinds
– IT stocks faced global slowdown.
– Clients reduced technology spending.
– Currency movement affected margins.
– IT has large index weight.
– This dragged overall indices.

» Manufacturing Growth Reality
– Manufacturing growth was uneven.
– Some sectors grew well.
– Others faced cost pressure.
– Capacity utilisation stayed moderate.
– Markets waited for consistency.

» Earnings Growth Matters Most
– Markets follow earnings growth closely.
– GDP growth without earnings disappoints markets.
– Revenue growth alone is insufficient.
– Profit growth must be visible.
– That takes time.

» Political And Policy Expectations
– Markets price policy expectations early.
– When policies are stable, surprise reduces.
– Stability is good for economy.
– But markets need surprises.
– Lack of surprises causes sideways movement.

» Liquidity Cycle Impact
– Liquidity drives market momentum.
– Central banks tightened liquidity.
– Easy money phase ended.
– Markets adjusted to new reality.
– This caused consolidation.

» Retail Investor Behaviour
– Retail participation increased strongly.
– Many investors entered at high levels.
– Markets need digestion time.
– Excess optimism cools down.
– Sideways movement cleans excesses.

» Sensex And Nifty Are Not Economy
– Indices represent limited sectors.
– Economy is much broader.
– MSMEs are not represented.
– Agriculture is not represented.
– Services are partly represented.

» Media Headlines Versus Market Reality
– Media simplifies economic news.
– Positive GDP creates optimism.
– Markets analyse deeper data.
– Profit margins matter more.
– Balance sheets matter more.

» Why Markets Pause During Growth
– Growth phases are not linear.
– Markets move in cycles.
– Pause is healthy.
– It avoids bubbles.
– It creates future opportunity.

» Long Term Market Behaviour
– Markets reward patience.
– Short term stagnation is normal.
– Long term trend follows earnings.
– India’s growth story remains strong.
– Markets will reflect eventually.

» What Investors Should Understand
– Do not link GDP headlines to returns.
– Markets may remain flat despite growth.
– Volatility is part of equity.
– Discipline matters more than timing.
– Asset allocation matters more.

» Index Funds Limitation In Such Phases
– Index funds mirror index movement.
– When index stagnates, returns stagnate.
– No flexibility to avoid weak sectors.
– No active stock selection.
– Investors feel disappointed.

» Why Active Funds Help Here
– Active funds can shift allocations.
– Fund managers avoid weak sectors.
– They identify emerging opportunities.
– They manage downside risk better.
– They add value in sideways markets.

» Role Of Fund Manager Judgment
– Markets need analysis during uncertainty.
– Fund managers study earnings deeply.
– They track sector rotation.
– Index funds lack this intelligence.
– Active approach helps investors.

» Regular Funds Advantage
– Regular funds offer guidance support.
– Certified Financial Planner helps discipline.
– Behaviour management is crucial.
– Panic decisions reduce returns.
– Guidance adds real value.

» Emotional Gap Between Economy And Markets
– Economy gives comfort.
– Markets give anxiety.
– Both are normal reactions.
– Investors must separate emotions.
– Rational thinking is essential.

» What This Phase Actually Signals
– Markets are consolidating gains.
– Valuations are becoming reasonable.
– Earnings visibility is improving slowly.
– This phase builds foundation.
– Next growth phase emerges later.

» Lessons From Past Market Cycles
– Markets never move in straight lines.
– Long flat periods are common.
– Strong rallies follow consolidation.
– Patience rewarded historically.
– Panic punished historically.

» How Investors Should Respond
– Continue disciplined investing.
– Avoid reacting to headlines.
– Focus on long term goals.
– Review asset allocation.
– Stay invested wisely.

» Economy And Market Relationship Summary
– Economy supports long term markets.
– Markets price future profits.
– Timing mismatch creates confusion.
– Both align over longer periods.
– Understanding reduces fear.

» Final Insights
– GDP growth does not guarantee market rise.
– Sensex and Nifty reflect profits, not emotions.
– High valuations limited recent returns.
– Global factors slowed momentum.
– Sideways markets are healthy phases.
– Long term investors should stay disciplined.
– Active management helps during consolidation.
– Patience and clarity create wealth.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10899 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 17, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 17, 2025Hindi
Money
I have taken 1Cr personal loan and started a teading business. My personal loan EMI is Rs 2.6laks. 25 laks top line business in trading with 4 % margin. After this successful completion of 3 years Took a business loan of 2cr and invested in a stone manufacturing took this plant on lease ,this unit run for a six months and because of land dispute it is stopped producing. Through this new investment nothing coming as return moreover now I am paying EMI OF 7.61 lakhs from my 1cr trading business. Right now my creditors is Rs 1.5 cr and debtors is 1.3 cr. New manufacturing debtors recovery only is Rs1cr but takes 6months time. Pls give your valuable suggestions to handle the loans ,EMI and business and cash flow.
Ans: Your courage in sharing full details deserves appreciation.
You took bold risks to grow business scale.
Your intent was growth, not speculation.
Now control and survival matter more than expansion.

» Current Situation Snapshot
– Multiple loans with heavy EMIs exist.
– Cash flow stress is severe.
– One business is active.
– One business is stalled.
– Recovery timing mismatch is hurting liquidity.

» Understanding the Core Problem
– EMI outflow is very high.
– Cash inflow is delayed.
– Capital is blocked in receivables.
– One unit produces zero income.
– Debt servicing depends on one business.

» Emotional Stability First
– Stress clouds financial judgement.
– Panic decisions worsen outcomes.
– Calm thinking improves options.
– Problems are solvable step by step.
– You still have working businesses.

» Trading Business Reality Check
– Trading business generates steady turnover.
– Margin is predictable.
– Cash cycle is shorter.
– This is your lifeline currently.
– Protect this business at any cost.

» Manufacturing Unit Reality Check
– Unit is currently non operational.
– Legal issue stopped production.
– Fixed costs may still continue.
– Loan obligation remains active.
– This unit is draining cash.

» Immediate Priority Definition
– Survival over growth.
– Liquidity over profitability.
– Debt control over expansion.
– Stability over optimism.
– Time is your biggest ally now.

» EMI Burden Assessment
– Personal loan EMI is heavy.
– Business loan EMI is heavier.
– Combined EMI exceeds comfortable cash flow.
– This imbalance cannot continue long.
– Intervention is required urgently.

» Creditor and Debtor Position
– Creditors amount is Rs 1.5 Cr.
– Debtors amount is Rs 1.3 Cr.
– Recovery is delayed.
– Timing mismatch causes pressure.
– Working capital is blocked.

» Recovery From Manufacturing Debtors
– Rs 1 Cr expected in six months.
– This is critical cash inflow.
– Recovery certainty matters.
– Legal enforceability must be checked.
– Follow up must be aggressive.

» Cash Flow Timing Mismatch
– EMIs are monthly fixed.
– Receivables are uncertain and delayed.
– This gap creates default risk.
– Managing timing is crucial.
– Income alone is not enough.

» First Action: Stop All New Investments
– No new business expansion now.
– No additional borrowing.
– No fresh capital deployment.
– Preserve every rupee.
– Focus only on stability.

» Second Action: Ring Fence Trading Business
– Separate trading cash flows clearly.
– Do not divert trading funds.
– Trading business pays EMIs currently.
– Protect working capital strictly.
– This business keeps you alive.

» Third Action: Manufacturing Unit Decision
– Assess legal resolution timeline.
– If delay exceeds viability, exit planning starts.
– Emotional attachment must be avoided.
– Sunk cost should not guide decisions.
– Cash bleeding must stop.

» Manufacturing Unit Exit Strategy
– Explore lease termination options.
– Negotiate with lender for restructuring.
– Offer temporary moratorium if possible.
– Present genuine hardship facts.
– Banks prefer resolution over default.

» Loan Restructuring Importance
– Restructuring is not failure.
– It is a survival tool.
– Approach lenders proactively.
– Show recovery plan clearly.
– Silence worsens lender trust.

» Personal Loan Restructuring
– Personal loans carry highest interest.
– EMI is choking cash flow.
– Request tenure extension.
– Request EMI reduction temporarily.
– Partial prepayment later can be planned.

» Business Loan Restructuring
– Business loan is large.
– Manufacturing stoppage justifies relief.
– Seek moratorium or reduced EMI.
– Submit legal dispute documents.
– Banks understand external disruptions.

» Using Expected Rs 1 Cr Recovery
– Do not spend emotionally.
– Allocate wisely before receipt.
– Priority is EMI reduction.
– Second priority is creditor settlement.
– Third priority is liquidity buffer.

» Allocation Discipline for Recovery Amount
– Clear highest interest dues first.
– Reduce monthly EMI burden permanently.
– Avoid reinvestment temptation.
– Keep cash buffer intact.
– Stability comes before growth.

» Creditor Negotiation Strategy
– Creditors prefer payment certainty.
– Open communication builds trust.
– Offer structured settlement timelines.
– Avoid hiding information.
– Transparency reduces legal escalation.

» Debtor Recovery Acceleration
– Follow up weekly.
– Use legal notices if required.
– Offer small discounts for early payment.
– Faster cash is better than delayed full amount.
– Liquidity beats accounting profits.

» Expense Control Measures
– Reduce personal expenses temporarily.
– Avoid lifestyle inflation.
– Delay non essential purchases.
– Family support is important now.
– This phase is temporary.

» Psychological Trap to Avoid
– Do not chase losses.
– Do not over trade.
– Do not take fresh high interest loans.
– Do not rely on hope alone.
– Discipline beats optimism.

» Risk Management Going Forward
– Avoid concentration in one income source.
– Avoid leverage driven expansion.
– Build cash buffers always.
– Scale only after stabilisation.
– Lessons here are valuable.

» Role of Insurance Policies
– If any investment linked policies exist.
– Review surrender values carefully.
– Liquidity may matter more now.
– Policy loans increase stress.
– Protection and investment must be separated.

» Long Term Financial Health Vision
– First goal is debt reduction.
– Second goal is cash stability.
– Third goal is controlled growth.
– Wealth creation comes later.
– Survival creates future opportunities.

» Family Communication
– Share situation honestly with family.
– Emotional support improves resilience.
– Joint decisions reduce stress.
– Isolation worsens burden.
– You are not alone.

» Time Based Plan Approach
– Next three months focus on liquidity.
– Next six months focus on restructuring.
– Next year focus on debt reduction.
– Growth planning comes later.
– Structured thinking reduces anxiety.

» What Success Looks Like Now
– EMIs aligned with cash flow.
– No overdue payments.
– Trading business protected.
– Manufacturing exposure limited.
– Stress levels reduced.

» Final Insights
– You are facing a cash flow crisis.
– This is not a failure.
– Your assets and skills still exist.
– Immediate control actions can stabilise.
– Restructuring is essential, not optional.
– Protect your profitable business first.
– Use recoveries wisely, not emotionally.
– Patience with discipline will restore balance.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10899 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 17, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 16, 2025Hindi
Money
Dear sir, i have choose sbi retire smart plus 10 years policy. Premium 6lak per annum for 4 years i paid. What happened if i complete the Premium should i wait till maturity. Or surrender after 5 years lock in period. Is it good to be patience till maturity or i will loss money due to inflation.
Ans: Your honesty in asking this question deserves appreciation.
You already paid large premiums with discipline.
That shows commitment to retirement planning.
Now clarity is more important than patience alone.

» Understanding What You Have Chosen
– This is an investment linked insurance policy.
– Insurance and investment are combined here.
– Charges are high in early years.
– Transparency is limited.
– Returns depend on internal fund performance.

» Premium Commitment Review
– You committed Rs.6 lakhs yearly.
– You already paid for four years.
– Total paid amount is significant.
– Cash flow pressure matters here.
– Every rupee must work efficiently.

» Lock-in and Surrender Reality
– Lock-in period is five years.
– Surrender before lock-in causes heavy loss.
– After lock-in, surrender value improves.
– However charges still continue.
– Patience alone does not remove inefficiency.

» Cost Structure Impact
– Mortality charges reduce returns yearly.
– Policy administration charges continue.
– Fund management charges apply separately.
– These reduce compounding power.
– Inflation impact becomes severe.

» Inflation Risk Explanation
– Inflation reduces real value yearly.
– Long holding needs strong growth.
– Such policies give moderate growth.
– Real returns may become negative.
– Retirement needs inflation beating growth.

» Return Expectation Reality
– Projected returns often look attractive.
– Actual returns depend on net allocation.
– Charges reduce effective returns.
– Volatility affects maturity value.
– Expectations must be realistic.

» Insurance and Investment Mixing Issue
– Insurance needs certainty.
– Investments need flexibility.
– Mixing both creates compromise.
– Neither objective is fully met.
– This is a structural weakness.

» Maturity Waiting Option Assessment
– Waiting till maturity avoids surrender loss.
– But opportunity cost remains high.
– Funds remain locked inefficiently.
– Growth may not beat inflation.
– Time lost cannot be recovered.

» Surrender After Lock-in Assessment
– Surrender after five years reduces penalty.
– You regain flexibility of funds.
– Capital can be reallocated better.
– Long term efficiency improves.
– This option deserves serious thought.

» Emotional Attachment Trap
– Past payments create attachment.
– This is a sunk cost.
– Future decisions should be rational.
– Focus on remaining years.
– Do not protect wrong choices.

» Comparison With Pure Investment Options
– Pure investments have lower costs.
– Flexibility is higher.
– Transparency is better.
– Goal alignment is clearer.
– Long term outcomes improve.

» Role of Actively Managed Mutual Funds
– Professional fund managers manage risk.
– Portfolio is reviewed continuously.
– Expenses are lower comparatively.
– Liquidity is superior.
– Compounding works better.

» Why Regular Mutual Fund Route Helps
– Guidance avoids emotional mistakes.
– Asset allocation stays aligned.
– Reviews happen systematically.
– Behavioural discipline improves.
– Long term results stabilise.

» Tax Efficiency Perspective
– Insurance tax benefit looks attractive.
– But returns matter more.
– Low returns waste tax advantage.
– Efficient growth offsets tax cost.
– Net outcome matters finally.

» Retirement Time Horizon Consideration
– Retirement corpus needs growth now.
– Capital protection comes later.
– Inefficient products delay growth.
– Time is precious.
– Every year counts.

» Cash Flow Stress Check
– High premium affects liquidity.
– Emergencies need ready funds.
– Lock-in restricts access.
– Stress impacts peace of mind.
– Simpler structure reduces stress.

» What Patience Really Means
– Patience is good with right products.
– Patience cannot fix poor structure.
– Long holding does not guarantee success.
– Quality matters more than duration.
– Review is wisdom, not impatience.

» When Continuing May Make Sense
– If surrender value is very low.
– If nearing maturity period.
– If cash flow is comfortable.
– If goals are already funded.
– Otherwise review is essential.

» When Exit Is Better
– If inflation erosion is clear.
– If returns lag alternatives.
– If flexibility is needed.
– If retirement gap exists.
– If charges dominate growth.

» 360 Degree Recommendation Thought Process
– Protect what is already paid.
– Avoid further inefficiency.
– Improve future return potential.
– Maintain adequate insurance separately.
– Align investments with retirement goal.

» Insurance Planning Clarity
– Insurance should cover risk only.
– Sum assured must be adequate.
– Premium should be minimal.
– Investment should remain separate.
– This gives clarity and control.

» Behavioural Discipline Going Forward
– Avoid pressure selling products.
– Ask cost related questions.
– Demand transparency.
– Review annually.
– Stay goal focused.

» Final Insights
– You acted responsibly by asking now.
– Product structure is not ideal.
– Inflation risk is real.
– Waiting till maturity may disappoint.
– Surrender after lock-in deserves evaluation.
– Reallocation can improve outcomes.
– Retirement planning needs efficiency.
– Timely correction shows maturity.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10899 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 17, 2025

Money
Dear rediffGuru, I am 48 year having private job, I have started MF investment from 2017 and currently monthly SIP 50K as below. I want to have corpus of 2.5 Cr at the age of 58. Please advice me if any changes/increase need in below SIP. 1. Nippon India small cap -Growth Rs 5,000 2. Sundaram Mid Cap fund Regular plan-Growth Rs 5,000 3.ICICI Prudential Small Cap- Growth Rs 10,000 4. ICICI Prudential Large Cap fund-Growth Rs 5,000 5. ICICI Prudential Balanced Adv. fund-Growth Rs 5,000 6. DSP Small Cap fund Regular Growth Rs 5,000 7. Nippn India Pharma Fund- Growth Rs 5,000 8. SBI focused Fund Regular plan- Growth Rs 5,000 9. SBI Dynamic Asset Allocation Active FoF-Regular-Growth Rs 5,000
Ans: Your discipline since 2017 deserves real appreciation.
You stayed invested for many years.
You already think long term.
This habit creates wealth over time.

» Your Goal Clarity
– You want Rs.2.5 Crores by age fifty-eight.
– You have ten years left.
– Time is still supportive.
– Regular investing helps greatly.
– Clarity itself improves outcomes.

» Present Investment Effort
– Monthly SIP is Rs.50,000.
– Investments are fully market linked.
– Exposure is mainly equity oriented.
– Risk appetite looks high.
– Commitment level is good.

» Portfolio Structure Observation
– Too many funds exist.
– Categories are repeating often.
– Small companies exposure is heavy.
– Sector exposure is present.
– Portfolio looks cluttered.

» Small Company Funds Concentration
– Many funds invest in smaller businesses.
– These funds give high returns sometimes.
– They also fall sharply during stress.
– Volatility increases with age.
– This needs careful control.

» Mid and Large Company Exposure
– Mid company exposure is moderate.
– Large company exposure looks limited.
– Large companies provide stability.
– Stability matters nearing retirement.
– Balance is essential now.

» Sector Focus Risks
– Sector funds depend on one theme.
– Performance cycles are unpredictable.
– Long underperformance periods happen.
– SIP discipline becomes difficult.
– Allocation should be limited.

» Dynamic Allocation Exposure
– Asset allocation funds manage equity levels.
– They help reduce downside risk.
– They suit late career investors.
– Allocation size matters.
– One such fund is enough.

» Over Diversification Concern
– Many funds dilute impact.
– Monitoring becomes difficult.
– Overlap increases silently.
– Returns may disappoint.
– Simplicity improves control.

» Suitability for Ten Year Horizon
– Ten years is medium term.
– Aggressive risk needs moderation.
– Capital protection gains importance.
– Drawdowns hurt goals.
– Adjustments are timely now.

» Expected Corpus Reality Check
– Rs.50,000 SIP alone may fall short.
– Market returns are uncertain.
– Inflation eats purchasing power.
– Increasing SIP helps.
– Step-up becomes very important.

» Importance of SIP Increase
– Income generally rises with age.
– SIP should rise yearly.
– Even small increases help.
– This supports target achievement.
– Discipline matters more than returns.

» Asset Allocation Improvement
– Equity should remain primary.
– Debt exposure should slowly increase.
– Stability increases closer to goal.
– This reduces panic risk.
– Allocation needs yearly review.

» Why Active Management Matters
– Actively managed funds adjust portfolios.
– Fund managers handle valuation risks.
– They exit overheated stocks.
– Index funds fall fully with markets.
– Passive funds offer no protection.

» Disadvantages of Index Investing
– No downside control exists.
– Full market falls are painful.
– Retirement timing risk increases.
– Investor emotions suffer.
– Active funds suit your stage better.

» Why Regular Plans Help
– Guidance improves behaviour.
– Rebalancing happens on time.
– Panic decisions reduce.
– Long term discipline strengthens.
– Cost difference is justified.

» Monitoring and Review Discipline
– Annual review is essential.
– Performance alone is insufficient.
– Risk alignment must be checked.
– Goal progress should be tracked.
– Reviews avoid surprises later.

» Tax Awareness During Accumulation
– Equity gains face capital gains tax.
– Long-term gains have exemptions.
– Short-term gains cost more.
– Holding period matters.
– Churning should be avoided.

» Emergency and Protection Planning
– Emergency fund is important.
– Job risk always exists.
– Insurance coverage should be adequate.
– Medical costs rise fast.
– Protection safeguards investments.

» Retirement Age Shift Possibility
– Retirement may shift slightly.
– Working longer reduces pressure.
– Even two extra years help.
– Flexibility increases success.
– Keep this option open.

» Behavioural Discipline Importance
– Market falls test patience.
– SIP continuity builds wealth.
– Stopping SIP hurts goals.
– Emotions damage returns.
– Discipline protects outcomes.

» Key Portfolio Refinement Direction
– Reduce fund count gradually.
– Avoid repeated category exposure.
– Increase large company allocation.
– Limit sector exposure.
– Maintain one dynamic allocation option.

» SIP Amount Enhancement Guidance
– Increase SIP annually.
– Use bonuses wisely.
– Direct increments into SIPs.
– This bridges corpus gap.
– Consistency beats timing.

» Goal Tracking Approach
– Review goal progress yearly.
– Adjust SIP if needed.
– Markets change yearly.
– Plans must adapt.
– Static plans fail often.

» Role of a Certified Financial Planner
– Helps align risk with age.
– Simplifies portfolio structure.
– Ensures tax efficiency.
– Supports emotional discipline.
– Improves goal probability.

» Final Insights
– Your investing habit is strong.
– Goal clarity is impressive.
– Portfolio needs simplification.
– Risk needs gradual control.
– SIP increase is necessary.
– Active funds suit your stage.
– Discipline will decide success.
– Time is still on your side.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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