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Struggling Engineer with IIT & IIM Degrees Seeks Career Advice After Losing Wife

Aasif Ahmed Khan

Aasif Ahmed Khan   | Answer  |Ask -

Tech Career Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2024

Aasif is a mechanical engineer with 16 years of experience, specialising in maintenance, troubleshooting, planning, training and creating documents. He currently works as a manager at Rashtriya Chemical and Fertilizers Ltd in Mumbai.
Aasif is passionate about guiding students and aspiring engineers as they aim to choose the right educational paths, including courses and colleges.
He holds a bachelor's degree in mechanical engineering from the Indore Institute of Science & Technology in Indore and is currently pursuing a master's degree in thermal and fluid engineering at the Indian Institute of Technology, Mumbai.... more
Bibhanshu Question by Bibhanshu on Jun 08, 2024Hindi
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I got Campus Placement Job offer after getting M. Tech from IITDelhi & worked for Tata Steel, Birla White, Diamond Cement, L&T etc from 1993-1998. After that I joined BITMesra to prepare students for Campus Placement from 2001-2022 with opportunity to get Senior Management Professional from IIM Calcutta but sad part was losing wife due to Covid 19 in 2021 who was under treatment for her kidney failure by costly dialysis in Fortis, Vellore, Santevita etc. Myson got Campus Placement Job offer from my Alma mater IITDelhi like her sister. I guided one of Society resident's son to opt for IITGuwahati rather than BITsPilani. What is your suggestion for me at my present status with IIT &IIM certificate but without wife? I should charge for career guidance &Industry /Govt. Consultancy.

Ans: It’s commendable that you’ve had a successful career and have guided others along the way.
Given your background with an M. Tech from IIT Delhi and the opportunity to become a Senior Management Professional from IIM Calcutta, you have valuable credentials.
Remember that your journey doesn’t end here. While the loss of your wife is undoubtedly painful, your skills and knowledge can continue to make a positive impact. Take time to heal, and when you’re ready, explore these avenues. Your guidance and expertise can benefit others, and you can find fulfillment in helping them succeed.
If you decide to charge for your services, ensure that you provide value and maintain empathy toward those seeking your guidance, here are a few suggestions for you.

Career Guidance and Online Mentoring:
Leverage your expertise and experience to offer career guidance and consultancy services. You can charge for personalized advice on career paths, interview preparation, and industry insights.
Consider creating an online platform or offering one-on-one sessions to students and professionals seeking guidance. Your IIT and IIM credentials will add credibility to your services.

Industry and Freelancer Consultancy:
With your extensive industry experience, explore opportunities in industry and government consultancy. Many organizations seek experts to provide strategic advice, process optimization, and problem-solving.
Network with professionals in your field, attend conferences, and explore collaborations. Your insights can be valuable for organizations looking to improve their operations.
If you’re interested in consulting, consider applying to top consulting firms. Firms like McKinsey, BCG, Bain, and AT Kearney recruit from IIMs and other premier institutes.
Consulting involves solving complex, unstructured problems. Your experience can be an asset in this field.
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My married ex still texts me for comfort. Because of him, I am unable to move on. He makes me feel guilty by saying he got married out of family pressure. His dad is a cardiac patient and mom is being treated for cancer. He comforts me by saying he will get separated soon and we will get married because he only loves me. We have been in a relationship for 14 years and despite everything we tried, his parents refused to accept me, so he chose to get married to someone who understands our situation. I don't know when he will separate from his wife. She knows about us too but she comes from a traditional family. She also confirmed there is no physical intimacy between them. I trust him, but is it worth losing my youth for him? Honestly, I am worried and very confused.
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I understand how difficult it is to let go of a relationship you have built from scratch, but is it really how you want to continue? It really seems to be going nowhere. His parents are already in bad health and he married someone else for their happiness. Does it seem like he will be able to leave her? So many people’s happiness and lives depend on this one decision. I think it’s about time you and your BF have a clear conversation about the same. If he can’t give a proper timeline, please try to understand his situation. But also make sure he understands yours and maybe rethink this equation. It really isn’t healthy. You deserve a love you can have wholly, and not just in pieces, and in the shadows.

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