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Widower Professor Seeking Romance: Help Me Navigate My Second Marriage Troubles

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1571 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 22, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Nov 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hi , I am a professor mech engineer , after death of my wife and due to having 5 year girl baby I planned for 2 nd marriage as I live alone away from home town because my of job with my little baby . I accepted a widow having 2 child ,she was working in a govt job 250 km away , after ensuring and agreeing her possibility of transfer and job vacancy @govt office near my house and ensuring she agreed that she will come to live with me along with her 2 kids and my little baby as her trasfer was due in comming few months . We lived apart during her job at 250 km away.,while meeting on weekly offs 6 /7 time in 6 months , then she take 360 degree u turn and said she will not get job transfer to my place and get her trasfer in other dept. in same previous office. And started telling many reasons like she will loose her children's inheritance in her in-laws property ,she will loose promotion , kids Don't want trasfer , and said we will live apart forever . This was contradictory to earlier agreed things .and my my purpose to live in family with my baby not fulfilled , so after long ruckus ,I mutually got divorce from her , Then After divorce I decided to marry non working women having no child and don't expect child as I am @48 year old and tired of living alone and managing job ,girl , house chores . I married to a divorcee girl from Pune ,she was BA first year college drop out girl of 44 yr age after 6 months of long dating on week ends . During 6 months I tried to know her indepth but was don't used to talk much as I was trying to know her true nature, we visited many places ,movies . She seemed perfect as per my requirement of girl wanting no child , and she is house wife . after marriage she behave well for 1 st week ,then she started trouble to hate my baby ( became kaikai )on pety things , she want my baby to house chores at the cost of her important year of 10th std study . She don't liked me taking tution of girl , she didn't like if I help my girl any way . She don't like if I spent some money on my girl . She used to fight all night and don't let me sleep . Now she stated demanding that she want baby , though I was against and b4 marriage agreed to not have any more child due to old age ,cost ,and no personal time for self , then I agreed to have child but b4 that I got her and my fertility tested ,she had weak eggs and syst on her reproductive organs and doc warned to not go for pregnancy due to risk and probability of unhealthy baby birth , but she kept repeating That she want child we consulted 4 Drs. She used to fight and go to her mother's home for 2/4 months after living with me for 2/3 days only . Now she wants divorce , and asks me to keep my girl in hostel if I want her in my life . This Ramayan has left me baffled , What should I do ??? .....

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
The reason to marry for you mainly has been companionship, a mother for your daughter...
And marriage is not a transaction BUT a meeting of minds...when there is no compatibility, there is no space for agreeing on the same things or wanting to make things work which is possibly what has happened with your 2nd and 3rd marriage.
If you want this marriage to work, there has to be an equal commitment by both of you, so, start by emotionally bonding first. Slowly build on this by making goals for the marriage and the future...your only goal can't be mother for your child...not all women are going to readily accept this and some may even falter along the way. Allow the lady and your daughter to bond together for sometime so they develop a unique relationship...
Understand that transactional relationships do not last; so, invest enough time in building trust in that companionship for it to become something meaningful

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/
Asked on - Feb 01, 2025 | Answered on Feb 03, 2025
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sorry to disagree Madm , I have not married just , for any transactions , I have married her for love and affection , and if she loves me then ,she would adapt my world unconditionally.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Okay! Kindly read this:
The reason to marry for you mainly has been companionship, a mother for your daughter.
So, I do agree with you...what exactly did you not agree with me on?

Read this:
If you want this marriage to work, there has to be an equal commitment by both of you, so, start by emotionally bonding first.
Do you not agree with this?

Kindly read this:
Allow the lady and your daughter to bond together for sometime so they develop a unique relationship...Understand that transactional relationships do not last; so, invest enough time in building trust in that companionship for it to become something meaningful...
Any new relationship takes time. If you have married for love and affection, then reason out with her that your daughter is absolutely important to you and you cannot leave her in a hostel.

I was actually speaking in your support and guiding you accordingly...Please read and read my first response again...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1571 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 26, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi, I married 1 year ago my wife told me she was forced to do a marriage against her concern and she didn't want the marriage life and wanted to live as strangers, also she refused to take wife responsibilities at home i have waited trusting she would change but she never changed. She is alone daughter to her parents borned after 16 years to their parents and she used to live outside around 17 year for her studies. After marriage whenever her parents come she used to ignore me, also she work in private sector and not share even single rupee to home. However all house hold work i do being boy, also she is not at all interested in intercource as well. After marriage 2 week she stayed in PG stating that my close friend will go to native allow me to spend time with her reast all i will be with you like. I agreed. Later 6 Month she used to give reasons for intercource i got periods, rashes, not feeling good, tiered, no mood, etc this happen till 6 month. After this we had 4 times in 2 month with protection that too just for 1 or 2 min as she mentioned lot of pain, after that she started avoiding, since i was not fulfilled by sex desire i started making extra marital affairs in facebook and turned to whatsapp only text, one fine day she saw all msgs i did with extra marital affair and she took photos of that and went to PG without informing any one. Later both families elder sat and asked she used to show the msgs that i did with extra marital affairs and she wanted seperate now from me. Though i accepted the extra marital affairs only interms of msgs and since you not willing to do sex i choose this way i mentioned. But she dont like to come back now. Her father took 2 month of time that he will change her mind set but i dont think she can. As her mother is also not good women, suporting her daughter and making such big issues and she also not interested in this marriage itself.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Sometimes people are just not ready for marriage and here your wife certainly came along with a huge baggage of unresolved issues behind her.
Marriage requires both partners to be responsible not just towards one another but take an active interest in their roles. This calls for maturity from both partners here.
Now, this was never a possibility with your spouse as she felt the marriage was a forced one. That is enough to destroy any chances of the marriage falling in place. You are also in a soup now that she has found her 'proof' that gives her a ticket out of this marriage.
The question here is: Do you want this marriage? If YES, then you will have to start down the part of proving your innocence and what led to what and how and when...If NO, then since your spouse has found her ticket to freedom, the only thing you might have to do is clearly state and not explain anything as to how things went downhill right from the beginning. Her parents may believe you or not, but that's what your decision needs. They may try to malign you in the family, just stick to your version of what happened and move on.
So, you are at that point where you need to make a decision. What is it going to be?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1571 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 31, 2024Hindi
Relationship
Hi Anu, this is Rajkiran here, I am 34 years old I have been married 4 years back to a girl through the relatives reference. My wife is govt worker and she only has one independent parent which is her mother. The marriage happened in a very short time during corona period and we had healthy few chats of how we expect our life's to be and we were both in common understanding and when I asked what is her expectations then she said she had no expectations at all and go by how life takes on. I was happy that I got right match and I am person not into any relationships and nothing and this marriage relationship was so new and started loving her more and she was also the same. She had also no relationships and not interested in marriage but due to her mother's pressure she got married to me. She also started liking the relationship and valuing it After 6 months she was pregnant and she went to her mom's house to stay as she was feeling comfortable there and I aslo let her stay as she wishes. Child was born in 2022 April and problem started here We had to name the child and it's usually dad who names the child because its family tree and decendent. But my wife got in middle and said she wants name as suggested by her mother, the first fight started and later i compromised for child sake and I agreed to her on the naming of child. After the naming ceremony done her mother acted differently to me and she was looking for fight, my wife was also on the same route they were allowing me see my child once in a month and she also did not bother to spend time and let child because with me. I love to be with child but unfortunately I am not able to spend time with him. This made me feel suffocating inside and was feeling bad, one day we planned to bring child to my home along with my wife and she also agreed to stay for 3days and for some reason child was crying as it was new to adapt and new people. My wife used the situation to pull a fight with me and she said I want to go home saying child is crying and he will fall sick. I requested to wait for another few hours if he calms down and we will see but she didn't listen and got very pissed off and had cold war with her for week. She stopped talking and she stopped everything. I had no idea what was so wrong that I did and it so bad. I tired always to talk to her and she didn't give space to me and my feelings. From September 2022 we were not together till now. I December 2022 I approached marriage counselling for her and me to unite with her, she also had come for counseling as it was religious institution and she had no option to opt out. Counselling was done and she told that she will be coming my house in a Weeks time. After a week again same story she didnt turn back and she didnt even want to put one step to solve issue, adament nature and influence of her mother. I waited for a year and approached legally by filing petition on restitution of conjugal rights. I went through 2 hearings she is not turning back. I am left no where and for this sake why I should have married. I don't want another marriage or any i have great love for my child and even my wife whatso ever she does i just love her.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There are a few individuals on Earth who sadly fail to see the larger picture; in your case your wife fails to see how marriage can bring stability to life and the child's growth.
Now why she wants to run back to her parents' place is something I don't understand BUT she surely has forgotten that making a marriage work means staying together and even if the two of you need to stay apart, it has to be due to work or other commitments that require that kind of an adjustment.
Do you know why she is so quick to run back to her family home? Even if she was pressured in marrying you, what's the point running away from what is obvious.
If you are sure about not wanting the marriage, kindly factor in that you have a child. Make an attempt to get back together, so that your child has a stable home. Request an elder member from your family to intervene and talk some sense into her mother who seems to be ignorant to the fact of ruining her daughter's life. Is her mother going to take on the responsibility of her daughter and her child? See where this line of action leads you to and then step in and appeal with your wife...This is all that you can do...Hope for the best thing to happen...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |566 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hi Mam, I met my ex wife in the college where we both were pursuing out studies. We exchanged contacts and started speaking over phone like couple does. When we fall in live we ourselves don't know as no one propose to each other. As i finished my studies, she quit studies in the middle and decided to do hotel management course. Amd it so happened, next day her interview was lined up but unfortunately due to unavoidable circumstances she has to go to her native place. As Covid struck she git stuck in her native place and couldn't come back. And when everything became normal i insisted her to come but her mom was not allowing. After a lot of struggle her mom allowed her and she came back. In this course of time both families was aware about our relationship. My mom was against her because of 2 reasons, 1) Intercaste 2) She was from very poor and low caste background. Them too i continued the relationship and i convinced to my sister and she convinced to mom. And when she was in native place, she said once that her voice has gone has gone she need 50k for operation. I trying madly to arrange funds and one of my friend told me that she is playing with you be careful but as i was blind in love i necer listened him. When she came to Mumbai i arranged a pg accommodation for her for some time and i use to take her out for dinner as there use to be regular fights with owner. Somehow i convinced my mom and shifted her to my place. There use to be fights but we use to care for each other also at the same time. She started to do events and slowly and steadily started to work in media. She was well aware that i dont like girls working media then too i have her permission to work in media temporary. I went against everyone, my family and friend and after 7yrs of relationship we decided to get marry and it was working fine. After marriage fight increased and she used to taunt though i did so much for her. Once she was not well and as she used to taunt me i never took care of her. One day my dear friend told me to check her phone, she might be seeing someone. And when i checked she was having an affair with Assistant director, i saw msgs photos. And when i confronted she said "He is just a friend and we talk normally" I saw they both on one bed and when i forward their pics to her mom she said "There might be some problem in you only." And when i asked to my ex wife about all this she said "A person goes where he or she gets love and care" All this happened within 6-8 months of our marriage. When i came to know about all this i tod her to leave my house and she was asking for divorce because of my mon's behavior also. I think i should have not tell her to leave as when she left i don't know but i love her very much. I even told her to give me one chance as i gave her but she didn't stopped talking with her bf. And she didn't gave me a chance and went away. We have been legally divorced but still i love her and ready to accept her. But she doesn't want to come back. I am trying to forget her but couldn't. Luckily we don't have kids. Sometimes my heart says let her go she cheated you. Sometimes it says i love now also. I am struggling to forgot her as i am in contact now also. Please suggest. Thank you
Ans: it's important to acknowledge and honor the love you felt and still feel. Love doesn’t simply disappear overnight, and it’s natural to have lingering emotions, especially when you’ve shared so much history and effort to keep the relationship going. However, it’s also crucial to recognize the harm and hurt caused by her actions and the unresolved issues that led to the breakdown of your marriage.

The fact that she chose not to return and continues to maintain contact with the person she was involved with suggests that she has moved on emotionally, even if you haven’t. Holding onto hope for reconciliation can keep you trapped in a cycle of pain and longing, which makes it harder to heal and move forward.

Your heart and mind are sending you mixed signals because you’re torn between the love you still feel and the reality of the betrayal. This is a common struggle after a significant loss, but it’s important to focus on what’s best for your emotional well-being. Continuing to be in contact with her may be preventing you from healing fully. It might be beneficial to create some distance, at least temporarily, to allow yourself the space to process your feelings and begin the healing process.

Focusing on yourself and your own growth is essential. Consider engaging in activities that bring you joy, spending time with supportive friends and family, and possibly seeking professional counseling to help you work through your emotions and develop strategies to move forward.

Letting go is difficult, especially when you still have love for someone, but it’s a crucial step towards healing. Accepting that the relationship has ended and focusing on your future can help you find peace and eventually open the door to new possibilities for love and happiness.

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Janak

Janak Patel  |23 Answers  |Ask -

MF, PF Expert - Answered on Mar 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 14, 2025Hindi
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Hello Sir, I have saving 50 lakhs, i am looking for monthly return of 30 k What the best to possible way to invest this amount. Is it good option to invest in index fund . Please advice
Ans: Hi,

You have not clarified the duration of your requirement, how long do you need monthly return?
But lets assume this is as long as possible.
There are many solutions to this and that involves knowing a lot more about you and your life state but will anyways will provide you a couple of options.
1. Fixed income investment - Invest in FD's at 7%, this will earn you 3.5 lakhs a year and should be covering your requirement. But the savings will remain at 50 lakhs. If the rate on FD falls down, then you will end up using your savings to cover your requirements. So this option may not be feasible for a long period. The risk being low, it may not grow your saving and it can erode your saving too.
2. Invest in Equity (mutual funds) - You mentioned Index funds, they can be considered along with other equity mutual funds too. But understand, there is a higher level of risk involved. Markets are and will be volatile and the returns will not be the same each year. If you have the temperament/patience to stay invested in market fluctuations then venture in this direction. When you are looking to fulfill your requirement each month, your investment will always stay on your mind and this will trigger behavioral traits and hence I mention temperament. Many people get unsettled seeing their investments erode in a short period of time and take decisions which are not rationale. Hence enter knowing the risk and yourself.
3. Middle ground - Invest in balanced option - something like a hybrid fund. If you are conservative (low risk), then go for conservative hybrid mutual fund schemes (more Debt and less equity) and expect returns slightly above your FD in the range of 8-9% which will serve your requirement and can add a bit to your savings. If you are not conservative and understand that market linked investment can provide a little extra boost to your investment then balance your risk with Balanced advantage Mutual Fund schemes (balanced approach to equity and debt). These schemes can provide you better returns up to double digits 10-12% and hence after meeting your requirements, your investment can grow too.

Please understand, Equity brings in market risks and hence have expectations but also understand the risks involved. Make your decision based on the appetite you have for loss bearing and safety and accordingly go ahead. Consult a good advisor or a financial planner who can guide you after knowing more about you and your requirement and also help understand tax implications.

Thanks and Regards
Janak Patel
Certified Financial Planner.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8157 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 26, 2025

Money
Dear Experts, As I have sold my flat for Rs 73 lacs in Mumbai, and I have no capital gains in that. Kindly let me know the best possible way to invest. As of now I am not interested in SWP.
Ans: Your Rs. 73 lakh can be structured for long-term wealth creation while maintaining stability and liquidity. Below is a comprehensive 360-degree investment approach that aligns with your goals and risk appetite.

Understanding Your Investment Goals
Before investing, it is important to define your financial objectives. Different investment instruments serve different purposes.

Short-Term Goals (0-3 years): Emergency fund, travel, planned expenses.

Medium-Term Goals (3-7 years): Buying a car, funding a business, higher education.

Long-Term Goals (7+ years): Retirement planning, wealth accumulation.

Since you are not interested in SWP, your focus should be on capital growth rather than generating regular cash flow.

It is also essential to maintain liquidity for unforeseen expenses. A portion of your funds should be in easily accessible instruments.

Asset Allocation for Maximum Returns
A well-balanced investment strategy involves diversification across multiple asset classes. This helps in reducing risk and optimizing returns.

A strategic allocation of your Rs. 73 lakh can be:

Equity Mutual Funds: 60-70% for high growth.

Debt Instruments: 20-25% for stability.

Gold ETFs or Sovereign Gold Bonds: 5-10% for inflation hedge.

Liquid Investments: 5-10% for emergencies.

The percentage allocation depends on your risk appetite and time horizon.

Equity Mutual Funds for High Growth
Equity mutual funds are one of the best options for long-term wealth creation. They offer superior returns compared to other asset classes.

Why Actively Managed Funds Over Index Funds?
Actively managed funds aim to outperform the market, while index funds only track it.

Skilled fund managers adjust portfolios based on market conditions.

Index funds lack flexibility and can underperform in volatile markets.

By investing in actively managed funds, you can potentially achieve better returns over a long period.

Recommended Categories of Equity Mutual Funds
Flexicap Funds: Invest across market capitalizations for diversification.

Large & Midcap Funds: Balance between stability and growth.

Focused Funds: Invest in a limited number of high-conviction stocks.

Thematic & Sectoral Funds: Suitable for high-growth industries but should not exceed 10-15% of your equity allocation.

By distributing your funds across these categories, you can manage risk while optimizing returns.

Debt Investments for Stability
Equity markets can be volatile, so having debt investments is essential for stability.

Why Debt Investments?
Provides predictable returns with lower risk.

Helps in portfolio diversification.

Protects against stock market fluctuations.

Suitable Debt Instruments
Corporate Bonds: Offer better returns than fixed deposits.

Debt Mutual Funds: Provide flexibility and tax efficiency.

Government Securities: Low-risk investment for capital protection.

Avoid bank fixed deposits unless you need absolute safety, as they may not beat inflation over time.

Gold Investments for Inflation Hedge
Gold acts as a hedge against inflation and economic uncertainties.

Best Ways to Invest in Gold
Gold ETFs: Offer liquidity and easy trading.

Sovereign Gold Bonds (SGBs): Provide additional interest income.

Limit gold allocation to 5-10% of your portfolio to maintain diversification.

Tax Considerations for Optimized Returns
Understanding taxation is crucial for effective investment planning.

Tax on Equity Mutual Funds
Long-Term Capital Gains (LTCG): Gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

Short-Term Capital Gains (STCG): Taxed at 20%.

Tax on Debt Mutual Funds
Both LTCG and STCG are taxed as per your income tax slab.

By strategically planning withdrawals, you can reduce tax liability.

Importance of Investing Through a Certified Financial Planner
Certified Financial Planners (CFPs) have expertise in fund selection and risk management.

Investing through a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) with CFP credentials ensures proper advisory support.

Direct funds may lack expert guidance, leading to uninformed investment decisions.

Investing through a professional can help in selecting the right funds based on your financial goals.

Liquidity Planning for Emergencies
Since you have Rs. 73 lakh, it is important to set aside a portion for unexpected expenses.

Keep Rs. 5-7 lakh in liquid funds or high-interest savings accounts.

Ensure accessibility without compromising returns.

This will prevent the need to redeem long-term investments during market downturns.

Review and Rebalancing Strategy
Monitor your portfolio every six months.

Rebalance if any asset class exceeds its target allocation.

Avoid frequent changes to stay aligned with long-term goals.

Market fluctuations can impact your asset allocation. Regular reviews ensure your portfolio remains on track.

Risk Management and Market Volatility
Investing in equity involves risks, but strategic planning can minimize them.

Stay invested for the long term to ride out market fluctuations.

Avoid panic selling during corrections.

Maintain diversification to reduce portfolio risk.

Risk management is crucial for sustained wealth creation.

Final Insights
Invest with a clear long-term strategy.

Diversification ensures balanced growth and stability.

Regular review and professional guidance enhance returns.

Minimize tax impact by planning withdrawals strategically.

Stay committed to long-term goals without getting influenced by short-term market movements.

By following this structured approach, your Rs. 73 lakh can be invested effectively for wealth creation.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8157 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 26, 2025Hindi
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Money
Dear Experts, As I have sold my flat for Rs 73 lacs in Mumbai, and I have no capital gains in that. Kindly let me know the best possible way to invest. As of now I am not interested in SWP.
Ans: Your Rs. 73 lakh can be strategically invested to create long-term wealth. Below is a detailed breakdown of how to approach this investment.

Assessing Your Investment Goals and Time Horizon
Clearly define your financial goals before investing.

Classify your needs into short-term (0-3 years), medium-term (3-7 years), and long-term (7+ years).

As you are not interested in SWP, focus on growth-oriented investments.

Ensure liquidity for any short-term or emergency needs.

Asset Allocation for Optimal Returns
Diversify your investment across different asset classes to reduce risk.

A mix of equity mutual funds, debt instruments, and gold ETFs can offer a balanced approach.

Your risk tolerance and expected returns should guide your allocation.

Equity Mutual Funds for Long-Term Growth
Actively managed equity funds can deliver higher returns than index funds.

Choose funds that align with your risk appetite and time horizon.

Consider diversified categories such as flexicap, large & midcap, and focused funds.

Thematic and sectoral funds should be limited to 10-15% of your portfolio.

Debt Investments for Stability
Some portion of your corpus can be parked in corporate bonds for stability.

Debt mutual funds can be an option if you need lower volatility.

Avoid FDs as they may not beat inflation in the long run.

Gold ETFs for Inflation Hedge
Gold ETFs can provide diversification and an inflation hedge.

Limit gold allocation to 5-10% of your portfolio.

Tax Considerations and Efficient Investing
Equity fund gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

Debt fund gains are taxed as per your income tax slab.

Invest through a Certified Financial Planner to optimize taxation and selection.

Periodic Review and Rebalancing
Review your portfolio every six months.

Rebalance if any asset class becomes overweight.

Stay invested for the long term and avoid unnecessary withdrawals.

Final Insights
Invest based on your goals, risk profile, and market conditions.

Prioritize long-term growth over short-term fluctuations.

Diversification and professional guidance can maximize returns.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Janak

Janak Patel  |23 Answers  |Ask -

MF, PF Expert - Answered on Mar 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 06, 2025Hindi
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Money
Hello Sir, I am 43 year old guy with own house in metro and no liabilities/loan. My current retirement portfolio consists of Equity MF 1.75 Cr, Debt MF 35 Lakhs, PF & Gratuity 36 Lakhs (Total: 2.46 Cr) . I will reach 3 Cr in next 2 years and I plan to retire by then. I also have a plot worth 30 lakhs I will rebalance my portfolio to have 50% Equity and 50% Debt/Fixed Income. If my monthly expense is 60,000 with no dependents, will my portfolio last for 40 years with 7% inflation and 8% returns?
Ans: Hi,

You have decided to retire early and you have already accumulated 2.46 Cr + assets without any outstanding liabilities. Congratulations on your achievements.
Retiring early is on many peoples wish-list and you too have the same desire. So lets see how you are placed for early retirement.
Expecting to have a corpus of 3 Cr in the next couple of years and you have planned a rebalancing of the portfolio too. So with the inflation rate of 7% and return rate of 8% as acceptable, lets see what to expect in the future after 40 years.

Short answer - After 40 years you will have a corpus of over 10 Cr remaining after expenses are taken care of.
This is primarily because your withdrawal/expenses are much below the growth/returns on the portfolio and hence each year the value of your portfolio in increasing.

Lets me clarify that this is not considering any tax liabilities you will need to service on the withdrawals each year. The tax liabilities will depend on the composition of your portfolio and your strategy of withdrawal amounts from Equity and debt/fixed income buckets.
But I am sure even after considering tax liabilities, your corpus will be sufficient and at the end of 40 years you will still have a considerable amount to pass on as inheritance to your loved ones/charity (though you mentioned no dependents).

I would like to recommend you have good Health cover (outside of your employer) and buy it asap. Also retirement of 40 years is a long time and hence do give some thought on how you plan to occupy your time. I hope you have a plan of what you will do once retired. Engage yourself in meaningful and fulfilling activities and keep minimum idle time - exercises, sports, reading, cooking, meeting/catching up with friends and family etc. This will help you stay healthy in mind and body. As money is not your concern, you don't need to think of earning any income from these activities/engagements, so it should be about giving you pleasant experiences. Best time to travel is in early retirement, so go and enjoy.

I also recommend, that you engage/consult with a Certified Financial Planner who will guide you with your retirement corpus planning and other requirements including taxation. Any wrong decision at an early stage can prove very costly and the impact can be felt for long too. Hence it will prudent to get the right advice and guidance at appropriate time.

All the best for long and enjoyable future.

Thanks & Regards
Janak Patel
Certified Financial Planner.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8157 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 26, 2025Hindi
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I am 34 Years old. Earning 80k in hand. Till now I have been through loans due to family constraints. Now I have repaid all my loans in advance by prepaying them. I invested in one mutual fund Mirae asset ELSS. But now I have stopped SIP in it. It currently has 2.20 Lacs. I have 3 lacs in bank and given 4 lacs to someone. Has KVP of 2 lacs maturing in 2033. Wife has two LIC policies maturing in 2033 with 15 lacs approx as maturity amount. I have two kids (boys) 1 and 5 years old. As I am in paramilitary so investing in NPS from past 9 years, currently it has 16.5 lacs corpus with 26 years of my job remaining. I want to invest in mutual funds 37k per month. I have no loans, no credit card and no other liability. I have chosen Parag Parikh Flexi cap-10000 SBI Gold Durect Plan Growth-5000 Bharat 22 Index Fund Fund-5000 Nippon India Large Cap-5000 Motilal Oswal Mid Cap-4000 Nippon India Small Cap-4000 Tata small cap-4000 All are direct plans. Want to start them all in Groww app from Apr 2025. I want to buy a house in next 8-10 years of approx 50Lacs current value. My car is ageing and want to replace it in next one year. Please suggest me if my approach is good or do I have to make adjustments.
Ans: Your disciplined approach to finances is impressive. Paying off loans early was a great decision. Now, you can focus on growing wealth and achieving your goals. Below is a detailed analysis of your financial plan.

Emergency Fund and Short-Term Liquidity
You have Rs 3 lakh in the bank and Rs 4 lakh lent out.

Ideally, keep 6 months of expenses as a liquid emergency fund.

Since your salary is Rs 80,000 per month, target Rs 5 lakh as an emergency fund.

If the Rs 4 lakh is not immediately recoverable, consider adding more liquid savings.

Park this money in a mix of a high-interest savings account and liquid mutual funds.

Insurance Protection
Life Insurance: You did not mention a term plan. Ensure you have one with coverage of at least 10-15 times your annual income.

Health Insurance: You did not mention a health plan. Get a Rs 20-30 lakh family floater policy.

Personal Accident Cover: Since you are in the paramilitary, a personal accident cover is essential.

NPS and Retirement Planning
You have Rs 16.5 lakh in NPS after 9 years. With 26 years left, this can grow significantly.

Continue contributing, but do not rely solely on NPS.

Diversify retirement savings with equity mutual funds to give flexibility at retirement.

NPS has withdrawal restrictions, so having non-restricted investments is important.

Investment Portfolio Review
Existing Investments
ELSS Mutual Fund: It is tax-saving but not suitable for long-term wealth building. Consider diversifying.

KVP: A low-return product locked until 2033. Not ideal for long-term wealth creation.

LIC Policies (Wife): If they are traditional endowment plans, they may have low returns. Consider surrendering and reinvesting if feasible.

Planned SIPs (From April 2025)
Your planned SIPs total Rs 37,000 per month. Below is an evaluation:

Parag Parikh Flexi Cap - Rs 10,000: Good choice for diversification and stability.

SBI Gold - Rs 5,000: Gold should not be a core investment. Reduce allocation to 5-10% of your portfolio.

Bharat 22 Index Fund - Rs 5,000: Index funds have limitations. Actively managed funds can offer better returns.

Nippon India Large Cap - Rs 5,000: Large-cap is important for stability. Keep allocation.

Motilal Oswal Mid Cap - Rs 4,000: Mid-cap funds offer growth but can be volatile. Moderate allocation is fine.

Nippon India Small Cap - Rs 4,000 & Tata Small Cap - Rs 4,000: Small-cap exposure is high. Consider reducing to avoid excessive risk.

Suggested Portfolio Adjustments
Reduce allocation to gold and index funds.

Maintain a mix of large, flexi-cap, mid, and small-cap funds.

Instead of direct funds, invest through an MFD with CFP credentials for better tracking and advice.

House Purchase Plan (8-10 Years)
The house is estimated at Rs 50 lakh in today’s value. Future value may increase.

Start a dedicated SIP in a hybrid or multi-asset fund for this goal.

Avoid real estate investment as a wealth-building tool. Buy a house only for personal use.

Car Purchase Plan (Next Year)
Since this is a short-term goal, avoid equity investment.

Use bank savings and allocate part of your upcoming savings for the purchase.

If needed, opt for a car loan but repay it quickly.

Final Insights
Keep an emergency fund of Rs 5 lakh.

Ensure you have term life and health insurance.

Continue investing in NPS but also in mutual funds for flexibility.

Review and rebalance your SIP choices.

Plan separately for house and car goals with appropriate investments.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8157 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 25, 2025Hindi
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48 years old, with PF savings as 40L, NPS 5L and not other investments. Home loan is there which will be over in next 12 years. have opted for LIC pension plan. Pl suggest the best option to plan retirement here.
Ans: Your focus on retirement planning is important. Let’s assess your current financial position and create a solid retirement plan.

Current Financial Position
Provident Fund (PF): Rs 40 lakh.

National Pension System (NPS): Rs 5 lakh.

LIC Pension Plan: Opted for.

Home Loan: Outstanding, to be cleared in 12 years.

Other Investments: None.

Your savings are primarily in PF and NPS. You also have an LIC pension plan. Your home loan will take 12 more years to be repaid.

Key Challenges in Retirement Planning
1. Low Investment in Growth Assets
Your funds are mainly in debt-based instruments.

This may not generate high returns for long-term wealth.

Inflation can erode the value of fixed-income investments.

2. Home Loan Repayment Impact
Your home loan EMI will reduce your savings capacity.

Loan repayment will extend into retirement unless pre-paid.

Extra financial burden should not impact post-retirement needs.

3. Insufficient Retirement Corpus
You have only Rs 45 lakh in retirement savings.

You may need Rs 3-5 crore depending on post-retirement expenses.

The LIC pension plan alone may not be enough.

Retirement Planning Strategy
1. Increase Investments in Growth Assets
You should start investing in mutual funds immediately.

A mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds is needed.

Systematic Investment Plans (SIP) will help build a strong corpus.

2. Reassess the LIC Pension Plan
LIC pension plans give low returns.

You may consider surrendering it and reinvesting in mutual funds.

A well-diversified portfolio can generate better inflation-adjusted returns.

3. Create a Debt Reduction Plan
Home loan should be cleared before retirement.

Consider partial prepayments when extra funds are available.

Reducing interest burden will free up future cash flow.

4. Increase NPS Contributions
NPS offers tax benefits and equity exposure.

Consider increasing contributions for higher retirement savings.

Choose an aggressive fund allocation for better long-term growth.

5. Build Emergency and Medical Funds
A separate emergency fund is essential.

Medical insurance should be increased beyond employer cover.

Healthcare costs in retirement can be significant.

Final Insights
Your current savings are not enough for early retirement.

Increasing investments in mutual funds is essential.

Home loan repayment should be accelerated.

LIC pension plan should be reviewed for better options.

A well-structured financial plan will ensure a comfortable retirement.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8157 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 25, 2025Hindi
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Hello Sir, I am currently 43 years of age and below are some of my assets. FD - INR 2.56 cr PPF - INR 45 lakh MF - INR 70 lakh PMS - INR 50 lakh Term Life Insurance - INR 2.5 cr Medical insurance (family plan) - INR 10 lakh Gold jewellery + physical gold - approx. INR 1 cr one house - yielding INR 30k per month rent currently investing 1 lakh per month in mf through sip (large, mid and small ap fund) staying in another house with family. Loans - zero monthly expense - INR 45k 2 kids - elder one in class 10th and younger one in class 6th education for both kids expected from school to higher education - INR 3cr marriage for both kids expected - INR 1 cr What age should i plan to retire expecting a life expectancy of 85 years for myself and wife and avg expense to be around INR 1 lakh at future date.
Ans: You have built a strong foundation. Let's assess your retirement feasibility from multiple angles.

Current Financial Position
You have Rs 2.56 crore in fixed deposits.

PPF corpus stands at Rs 45 lakh.

Mutual fund investments are Rs 70 lakh.

PMS investments are Rs 50 lakh.

You own Rs 1 crore worth of gold.

A rental property earns Rs 30,000 per month.

You have a term life cover of Rs 2.5 crore.

Medical insurance is Rs 10 lakh for your family.

Your monthly expense is Rs 45,000.

You invest Rs 1 lakh per month in mutual funds.

Key Future Financial Goals
Children's Education: Rs 3 crore estimated cost.

Children's Marriage: Rs 1 crore estimated cost.

Retirement Corpus: To sustain Rs 1 lakh monthly expense.

Retirement Feasibility Analysis
1. Children's Education and Marriage
The first major financial commitment is education.

Your existing corpus and future savings must ensure Rs 3 crore.

Marriage expenses will require an additional Rs 1 crore.

2. Retirement Corpus Requirement
You expect to retire with Rs 1 lakh monthly expenses.

This expense will increase due to inflation.

A large retirement corpus is needed to sustain for 40+ years.

Can You Retire Now?
Your current investments may not fully support retirement yet.

The education and marriage costs are substantial.

You must balance wealth preservation and growth.

What Age Should You Retire?
A realistic age for retirement could be around 50-55 years.

This allows you to accumulate a stronger corpus.

You can continue investing Rs 1 lakh per month.

A phased withdrawal strategy will be needed post-retirement.

How to Strengthen Your Retirement Plan?
1. Increase Equity Allocation
Your PPF and FD investments are conservative.

Consider reallocating part of your FD to mutual funds.

PMS allocation should also be reviewed for performance.

2. Ensure Inflation Protection
Fixed deposits may not beat inflation long-term.

Equity exposure should remain high for growth.

3. Healthcare Preparedness
Rs 10 lakh medical insurance may be insufficient in the future.

Consider a super top-up plan for additional coverage.

4. Rental Income Optimization
Your rental property provides stable income.

Ensure it remains a profitable asset.

Final Insights
You are on track but need to optimise investments.

A retirement age of 50-55 years is ideal.

Equity exposure must be increased gradually.

Education and marriage costs must be secured first.

Healthcare preparedness is crucial for long-term security.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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