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Shalini

Shalini Singh  |186 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Nov 30, 2025

Shalini Singh is the founder of andwemet, an online matchmaking service for urban Indians living in India and overseas. After graduating from college as a kindergarten teacher, Singh worked at various firms specialising in marketing strategy, digital marketing and public relations before finding her niche as an entrepreneur. In 2008, she founded Galvanise PR, an independent communications and public relations. In 2019, she launched andwemet.
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Asked by Anonymous - Nov 30, 2025Hindi
Relationship

My partner gets angry over very small things. Last time, I didn't respond to his call for 15 minutes and he kept calling to check what happened. Earlier, I thought it was out of concern, but even if I meet my friends without telling him, he gets upset. We fight over little, trivial things, and he would later say he didn’t mean it. I am scared to speak my mind. I don't know what will make him angry. How do I know if this is a toxic relationship?

Ans: I am scared to speak my mind. you said this. This will end up becoming a relationship you will not wish to be in.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |713 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Aug 24, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 24, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
What are the warning signs that your partner is a toxic one?
Ans: A- Dear Anonymous,

It is tricky to identify if your partner is toxic, or to recognize toxic traits but here are some behaviors that are considered toxic in most cases, but these too depend on the context.

• Jealousy- If your partner seems jealous every time you speak to the opposite sex or even of your success, it is ideally considered a toxic trait.
• Controlling- Trying to control how you carry yourself, whom you meet or even your social circle is a clear red flag. In every possible scenario, this is toxic.
• Keeping score- Yesterday you fought, so today your partner feels they are entitled to start a fight, or last week they sorted a fight so this week you should or the ball is in their court. If this is how your partner handles every situation and brings in a sense of competition in your relationship, it can be easily defined as an unhealthy relationship.
• Drama- Does your partner thrive on drama? No amount of love is worth it.
• Cheating- It goes without saying that cheating is a red flag. Not only if your partner has been physically involved with someone else but also if they are building a romantic emotional connection with someone.
• Trust issues- It can happen to the best of us, but if someone is suffering from trust issues, the onus is on them to sort it out instead of doubting their partner's every move.

If your partner exhibits one or all of these traits, it is best you have a clear discussion and point out the habits that are bothering you. But remember, some of these can be harmless based on the situation.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1778 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 24, 2024

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Relationship
Hi, how to know if I'm in Toxic relation? Problem is my wife gets angry for reasons only known to her. When she got angry she locks the door and stay there until you kept banging it. Even left unattended she will stay inside the room for day (last time she stayed for 4days without food- I believe so) or she leaves the house without information and I need go out and search for her. Even if she opens the door by anychance I should beg like anything for her to eat/drink. There's no communication whatsoever. I tried to convey it many times, if you got angry take sometime and should respond saying what mistake I did either by a message or a note or something she is comfortable with. But all the efforts were in vain. Its been almost 1.5years but still we did consumate, I took her to a gynecologist but even after getting some consultation she didn't change. Sometimes she showcases too much affection and also the anger side. I feel like I'm fearing to talk to take even small decisions like spending time with my family/friends/going out alone. Even she gets possessive if I talk to my cousin/neiece which I don't understand. Informed her father/brother on few things but still there is no improvement. I just feel I'm lost and donno about the future (kids/house/bring parents to stay with me/ etc..). Plz help
Ans: Dear Sandeep,
What you are facing is called 'Emotional Blackmail' which is toxic. It's like when a child who cannot speak does not get what he/she wants, there's a tantrum thrown around just to get your attention.
As an adult, your wife is displaying something similar as she protests by locking herself up to get your attention and make you do or undo certain things that has caused her displeasure or sadness.
She must train herself to communicate what she wants and not, what exactly she does not like...instead if she throws a tantrum, ignore her...even if it's a child, instead of giving into the tantrum, if you ignore, the child calms down and then learns how to convey through communication...
When she is hungry or thirsty, eventually she will open the door and eat...don't worry. But the more you accept this behavior, the more she will continue to gain your attention. So help her learn how to communicate.
(By the way, how does a gynaecologist fit in here? I don't understand the relevance!)
But it be good if you did do a blood check to rule out any vitamin deficiencies which can trigger a lot of low states of mind. Talk to your GP who can advice you on this...till then help her learn a new behavior of communication.

All the best!

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11091 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 31, 2026

Money
I am Snehansu Ranjan Roy. I am holding one Motilal oswal midcap mutual fund for more than One year now. Initially it was going well in 2024-25. By by end of 2025 the fund was loosing steam and now has lost almost 15% from its peak. Now I understand that due to low return in IT stocks in their port folio the fund is underperforming. I would like your advice as to hold on for some more time now or switch gradually from this fund to some Multi asset fund which are giving better returns in todays market, since I was thing of starting SwP from the fund since it is more than one year now. Thanking you, Snehansu Ranjan Roy.
Ans: You have taken a very thoughtful step by reviewing your mutual fund performance after one year and also thinking about starting SWP. This shows good financial awareness and discipline. Many investors react emotionally during mid-cap corrections, but you are analysing calmly. That is a strong positive sign.

Now let us evaluate your situation properly before deciding whether to hold or switch.

» Understanding why your midcap fund is correcting

– Midcap funds normally move faster up and also faster down compared to large cap funds
– A 15% fall from peak is not unusual in midcap category
– Underperformance due to sector exposure like IT is usually temporary, not permanent
– Fund performance should be judged across one full market cycle (minimum 3–5 years)

So one year is too short a time to judge a midcap strategy.

Many midcap funds corrected during late 2025 because valuations became high earlier. This correction is part of the cycle.

» Whether starting SWP from a midcap fund is suitable now

This is a very important point.

SWP works best when:

– fund volatility is low
– returns are stable
– downside risk is limited

Midcap funds do not match these conditions.

If SWP starts from a volatile fund:

– units get redeemed during market fall
– long-term growth reduces
– capital erosion risk increases

So starting SWP from a midcap fund is generally not ideal.

» Whether shifting gradually to a multi asset fund makes sense

Your thinking here is practical and mature.

Multi asset funds invest across:

– equity
– debt
– gold and sometimes other assets

Because of this:

– volatility reduces
– downside risk becomes lower
– SWP sustainability improves
– emotional comfort increases

This category is suitable especially when investor wants income stability along with moderate growth.

So your idea of gradual switching is sensible.

» How to switch in a safer way

Instead of switching full amount immediately:

– shift gradually in 4 to 6 stages
– spread switching across few months
– continue holding some portion in midcap for growth
– move SWP portion into multi asset category

This keeps balance between growth and stability.

» Tax impact before switching

Since your holding period crossed one year:

– gains become long term capital gains
– tax applies only if gains exceed Rs 1.25 lakh in a financial year
– LTCG tax rate is 12.5% beyond exemption limit

So gradual switching helps manage tax efficiently.

» A balanced strategy suitable for your stage

Considering your approach and your earlier planning style shared in previous discussions:

– keep midcap allocation for long-term growth
– move SWP portion into multi asset category
– maintain some exposure to flexi-cap category for stability plus growth
– avoid withdrawing aggressively during market correction phase

This creates both income comfort and capital protection.

» When you should continue holding the midcap fund

Continue holding if:

– investment horizon is more than 3 years
– fund management quality remains consistent
– correction is sector-specific not structural
– portfolio still aligned with your risk level

Selling only because of short-term underperformance is usually not beneficial.

» Finally

Your thinking about risk reduction before starting SWP is correct and timely. Instead of exiting the midcap fund completely, a partial and gradual shift towards a multi asset category is a more balanced and practical solution. This helps you protect capital, support SWP stability, and still keep long-term growth opportunity alive.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11091 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 31, 2026

Money
I am 70 yrs old. No financial commitment right now. Retired from Bank 10 yrs ago. I am expecting around 1.00 cr from immovable property sale. Please suggest, where I can invest.
Ans: You are in a comfortable and strong position at age 70. Having no financial commitments and receiving about Rs 1 crore from property sale gives you a valuable opportunity to create stable income for life and protect capital for future medical needs and family support. This stage requires capital protection first, income second, growth third.

Below is a structured approach suitable for your age and situation.

» First Priority – Keep Emergency Medical Reserve Separate

Before investing the full amount:

– Keep about Rs 10–15 lakh in safe and liquid options
– This amount should be available immediately for health needs
– It should not be linked to market movement
– This gives peace of mind and avoids forced withdrawals later

At age 70, this step is very important.

» Second Priority – Monthly Income Planning

Your investment should generate regular income without risk to capital stability.

Suggested approach:

– Allocate around 40% into conservative mutual funds suitable for income withdrawal
– Start Systematic Withdrawal Plan (monthly income)
– Withdraw only moderate amount so capital lasts longer

This helps create pension-like income without locking money permanently.

» Third Priority – Stability Allocation

Another 30–35% can be placed in safe interest-oriented instruments like:

– senior citizen eligible deposit structures
– post office backed income options
– short-duration debt-oriented mutual funds

Purpose:

– predictable returns
– low volatility
– steady support income

» Fourth Priority – Growth Portion (Important Even at 70)

Even at age 70, some allocation to growth is necessary because:

– inflation reduces purchasing power
– medical costs rise every year
– life expectancy now extends beyond 85

So allocate about 20–25% into carefully selected diversified equity-oriented mutual funds through staggered investment.

This portion protects long-term wealth value.

» Avoid Investing Entire Amount in One Option

Many retirees make this mistake:

– putting full amount into deposits
– locking full amount into one scheme
– giving money for high-return private offers
– lending to relatives without structure

Diversification is the protection shield at this stage.

» Tax Efficiency Planning Is Important

Property sale creates capital gains implications.

So before investing:

– calculate capital gains tax properly
– explore legal reinvestment strategies available
– structure investments in phases instead of lump sum deployment

This preserves more of your wealth.

» Nomination and Estate Planning Must Be Updated

Since you have no commitments now:

– ensure nominee details are correct
– prepare a simple Will
– document investment structure clearly
– inform family members where records are stored

This prevents confusion later.

» Suggested Allocation Structure (Simple Model)

A balanced structure may look like:

– 10–15% emergency reserve
– 30–35% stable income options
– 40% income-support mutual funds
– 20–25% growth mutual funds

This creates:

– monthly income
– liquidity
– inflation protection
– capital safety balance

» Health Insurance Check

Even if you already have coverage:

– review whether coverage is sufficient today
– add top-up if required
– keep separate medical reserve anyway

Medical inflation is the biggest risk after retirement.

» Finally

At age 70, the goal is not maximum return. The goal is steady income, capital protection, and independence with dignity. With proper allocation of this Rs 1 crore, you can comfortably create reliable income support for the rest of your life while preserving wealth for future needs and family support.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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