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Ravi Mittal |599 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 03, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 03, 2025

Relationship

I am married but I find my neighbour very hot. He recently smiled at me and since then I am unable to resist talking to him. Is it normal to be attracted to a male after you're married?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Being married doesn’t turn off your ability to appreciate good looks of people other than your partner but it is only okay up to a certain point. Most of the time, these attractions are fleeting and what really matters is how you handle them. But while we are at this discussion, I would remind you that your marriage or partner might not seem as interesting and exciting right now, but it is much more than that. Long-term relationships can become mundane. It is important to address anything that you might be lacking in this relationship- is the excitement missing? Do you need more emotional support or maybe more time and attention? N number of things can trigger what you are feeling right now, and at the same time, this can be stemming from nothing and you simply found another human being good looking. But I would still recommend healthy boundaries even if your intentions are completely pure.

Hope this helps.

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Anu Krishna |1617 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 17, 2023

Question by Samrat - Oct 14, 2023Hindi

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Relationship

Hii Anu, I am always curious about relationships and I have come across my relationship problems of my friends and solved them. But for a very long time I am wandering about the why even a happily married woman get attracted towards someone else ( I am not asking about males because I think I know about them) . Do these extramarital attractions are always result of deep unidentified issue in their marriages or it is a result of specific qualities that we admire ? Please help me to understand about these kinds of attraction outside committed relationships

Ans: Dear Samrat,
We are all humans and to develop feelings for someone is not the nature of a particular gender BUT to respond to that attraction is a choice that we have...
To have feelings for someone is also not dependent on whether one is married or not as it can be a product of some inadequacy within a marriage or relationship OR simply an infatuation which knows no age or marital status...
It could also be that you admire someone for who they are and get attracted towards them irrespective of being married or not AND what you do with that attraction is something that you have a choice on...
So, these attractions can be short-lived or when responded to can turn into a full affair but not without dragging a lot of people down...
Bottom line: Attraction is normal and usual BUT how you respond to it is something that will rule the next phase of your life...

All the best!

Ravi Mittal |599 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 06, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 04, 2023Hindi

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Relationship

Hello. Although i am married for 12 years and have a 9 year old son, the relationship with My Wife when it comes to Intimacy is not good. There was a Female Colleague in My Last Company who was very much similar to me when it comes to hobbies and interests. Although i and her left that Job sometime back, but till date i am in touch with her and love talking to her. I talk with her everyday wishing her on WhatsAPP and sometimes chat on life. But i guess have developed feelings for her but i am not sure. Due to lack of sex in my married life, i sometimes also fantasise about her making love. She is ok always meeting me but i fear that if i meet her i might cross the line. Is it ok to feel like that and should i share my feelings with Her?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

A long-term relationship might seem mundane and routine after a while but that does not permit you to develop feelings for someone else. While meeting up with your female colleagues is no big deal, when you have feelings for that colleague and doubt that you might cross a line, do you still think it's worth considering the meet-up? I doubt that.

I understand that you have a good bond with this person, and you are feeling unfulfilled in your marriage, but that still does not allow you to cheat on your wife in good conscience. I suggest three things-

1) Introspect and evaluate why you are having these feelings outside of your marriage.
2) Have a clear discussion about the same with your wife.
3) Work on the issue one step at a time, and work on it together. If needed, see a marriage counselor. We all need a little extra help once in a while.

Every marriage hits a bump or two. It will be okay once you shift your focus to the right place.

Best Wishes!

Anu Krishna |1617 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 21, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 18, 2023Hindi

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Relationship

Iam 50 yrs old married man i have attraction towards my maid servant she is married.I gifted her some gifts she accepted the same but after she told me that if my wife knows that i have gifted her.I usually get attracted towards ladies.Kindly suggest the same

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Attraction is normal BUT acting on that attraction is a CHOICE...
So, what makes you choose to gift your maid and then create nuisance within your family life?
Someday when your wife is not so 'accepting' of this great gesture of yours, she may threaten to walk out OR worse still the maid may threaten to expose your deeds to other people around.
What makes you play around with your life like this?
'I usually get attracted towards ladies' - then kindly learn and train your mind to focus on things that add value to life instead. Indulging in this attraction will only make you want to earn the attention of more women. Instead gain the same attention by using your work expertise and/or hobby within your social circle and family. But this is only temporary...Find the motivation within you to be able to focus on things that matter for your growth...that's a good way to rework this habit that you have cultivated over time.

All the best!

Ravi Mittal |599 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 29, 2024Hindi

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Relationship

I am having feelings my colleague who is older than me and is married with two kids. I am also married with one kid. What should I do now? Should I confess my feelings to him?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
First of all, I would need a little more detail about your relationship with your husband and why you are seeking romantic feelings outside your marriage to make any comments or suggestions. But, from a general perspective, I would recommend you focus on what's lacking in your marriage and fix it- maybe, see a marriage counselor. Plus, you mentioned having feelings for this colleague but never mentioned if he feels the same way. If not, why would you confess your feelings to him and create even the minimum chaos in his otherwise happy marriage? Again, from a general perspective, the entire thing sounds like a bad plan.

Hope this helps.

Anu Krishna |1617 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 01, 2024

Relationship

What to do if you start having feelings for a married guy and he is also showing signs of crazyness ???? Is it normal ,?? I feel happiness when he is around . Pls help. What to do if i fall for him ??

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Feelings are natural but hey, what you do with those feelings are your choice!
So, if you feel happiness when he is around, then it's a red flag for yourself. What is it that you are missing with your life that you seem to get with this guy? Not healthy at all...And falling for him is a CHOICE that is in your hands...whether you choose to act on it or not, is a decision you can make...so, you are not helpless...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ans: Hi Swapan,
NEET - Nursing?
Extract from neet 2025 bulletin.

13.5 Use of the Result of NEET (UG) - 2025 by other Organizations
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