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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 08, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Prasad Question by Prasad on Dec 28, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Hi Maam, I am in a process of awaiting divorce from my wife and now I am in a relationship with my previous girlfriend.She is also in a process of awaiting divorce from court.We are in touch from a year ago and we both are planning to marry and everything was working fine but suddenly there are so much misunderstandings happened as she is observing my belonging things (Bags,tiffin,etc.)in my absense and I found an old lemon wrapped in paper in my bag.She is confused whether to proceed for marriage or not as I think.I have doubt whether she has got any option for marry as she is continuously busy on call and messages from a few days ago.We also decided to talk face to face and clear misunderstandings but due to her birthday came today we have postponed the meeting.We are working in same office as I have joined her in my office per my reference. Please help me know what decision I should take about my life.I dont want to lose her as she is my first love which came in my life twice.Hoping for a effective suggestion.

Ans: Dear Prasad,
Past relationships may not necessarily be the same in the present. People change, situations change...
What would she get by 'observing' your belongings? I don't understand that!
If she is still unsure whether to go ahead with you or not, then you may just be another option for her to choose from. I suggest that you stop being too available to her and then watch...Allow her to feel your absence and this will make her appreciate your presence in her life. This will help her realize your value...Otherwise, just on a whim, she might decide and marry you when you never gave her a chance to know your worth!
Take a PAUSE, be a little unavailable and then watch how she responds to it...If she is truly in love with you, I am sure she will do what it takes to appreciate you and also learn to understand what she wants for herself in life.

All the best!
Asked on - Jan 08, 2024 | Answered on Jan 11, 2024
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Ok ma'am...thanks..I am really observing her as she is in my office .day to day the face comes in front..but the thing is that she says that my parents are looking someone which they want and they wish ahe could marry with the person which they decide..but when she came in my life she told me that I am totally alone we can plan our future from here..but suddenly how can just a miracle happen??I was always planning for life with her...but now she is working in my office but she says we can't come in our relationship in future..so I am so much confused what to do ..I am executing the changes which I have promised her.but still I am not getting the clue whether to continue with her or not .she is totally on the closing...plz guide me
Ans: Dear Prasad,
Hasn't she told you that 'we can't come in our relationship in future'?
Which part of this sentence do you not understand? What more do you want her to say that will convince you that she is not interested in you?
That's why I had suggested that you become unavailable to her. If she has feelings, your absence may possibly make her want this relationship and it will be her turn to make things work...
But I get this feeling that you are in desperate space and want to hear that All is Well...No, it isn't for now...
Either with the space that you make will get her back in an appreciative way OR you will realize your own worth...either way, you will be better than what and where you are now...Hope this helps you get on the right path...

All the best!
Asked on - Jan 14, 2024 | Answered on Jan 15, 2024
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Dear ma'am, As per your reply now I am observing that she is behaving with me as per our prior relationship..but in future I don't expect this thing again to happen in our life I just want to know that will she be my lifetime love for my whole life as my true life partner? I don't want any other unknown person to be my life partner..plz help me with my query
Ans: Dear Prasad,
Who knows the future? Can we predict it accurately?
If she has already declared: 'we can't come in our relationship in future'?, then what makes you go over this again and again?
It seems like you are more into her than she is into you...and one-sided relationships rarely work. You will only end up hurting yourself and question yourself on: What went wrong?
It's maybe time for you to explore your world more...who knows you might come across someone who appreciates you for who you are...
It's about chasing a known person who doesn't value you OVER giving a chance to an unknown person who values you. What makes better sense to you?

All the best!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 03, 2023

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I'M 40 years old man, i have had troubled childhood. I faced abuse from my elder brother who later on developed mental health issues whiich broughg lot of stress to the family. I worked very hard to achieve reasonable professional success but my personal life has been very difficult. I got married with lot of difficulty despite being well placed professionally and decent looks. It was an arranged marriage but things went bad after a year. I caught my wife having an affair with her ex but i fogave her for the sake of myndaugher who was just 1 year old then. She keept on having flings with gym instructor and later on her colleagues which i dont have any proof of. She would humilate me in front of my maid driver and other people. But i wanted ti save my marriage for the sake of my daughter who was only 4-5 years old then. Finally she started asking me for divorce after every trivial fights. Fed up i finally agreed and we separated in 2021 November. During that time i came in contact with my school friend. She proposed to me during our school days but due to stress at home and other issues i said no but i always liked her. When we started talking around December 2021 and we realized we still love each other after 20 years. But problem was though i was divorced she was still married and she is from a different religion. She is trying hard to get separated from her husband but her family being very conservative is not allowing her to do so. I'm stuck with her emotionally. Now my ex-wife has started approaching me for reconciliation. Im totally confused now what should i do? Should i wait for my friend knowing that chances are very slim that her family would leave her. Or should i patch up with my exwife for the sake of my daughter. I dont feel any emotional connection with my exwife now as she was never nice to me. But my parents are telling me to go for patch up. They are nkt aware about my school friend and i doubt they would approve her due to religious beliefs. Pls guide me I'm totally confused. Thanks A confused Homo Sapiens
Ans: Dear Pratik,
At this point in time, choose neither. You need space to clear your head first.
Too many emotional situations to jump into one more...Give yourself time to figure out what is that you want out of life?
Do you want to get into another commitment in a short gap? It could be an attraction on a rebound as well; so take time to figure these things out well before you decide to patch up or wait for your friend.
You deserve this time off, to make sure that you not only heal from the marriage but also put things in perspective.
So no need to bring on a new confusion for the time being till you get strong enough in the mind to decide the next course of your life. Making a choice right now means you will be bringing in more confusions of either of the two women into your life as well. So, PAUSE and take this time...

Best wishes!

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 29, 2024
Relationship
Hello Dr.Ashish, I'm married, 45 years self employed man. There was batch mate in my college, whom i was in love with. Due to some misunderstanding, we stopped talking for some time and I moved to other city for my job, but kept meeting her during my visits. I told everything i felt about her but she never accepted or refused. In general she used to tell everyone that she will never get married and she is aversive to physical relationship. Later on every 5 years or so we used to get in touch with each other and continue talking to each other and reach to a level where my feelings were at peak and then she will refuse or fight to move away.This was till I got married. After, 6 years of my marriage once we met in a shopping mall, in some other country, and exchanged pleasantries as well as contact; then started talking again. My marriage was/is a hell, so i had more to share with her, and she showed genuine interest in listening and advising. During this conversation our future also came in to discussion, due to extensive flashback discussion about our old times. She remembered every small big things except any event, where she has shown interest in our future together at personal level, but discussion of professional level association was intact. Eventually, one day she confirmed on we to be together, but not to over celebrate it and let it grow and work on execution ...means divorce part. There was an extreme sad event in my family, besides my daughter of 5 years, hence i had to postpone my divorce for sometime so that, family doesn't get two shocks at same time. In the mean time, we continued talking with each other and after 5-6 months, her statements started changing about future, and eventually she said there is no future and i cant talk to you since, you always bring romance in our conversation and I'm aversive to sex/love/romance type discussions. Then we again drifted apart for an year; and, this coming close to move away, happened 3 times in last two years. Recently we started again speaking and got in to business assignment together, and i decided not to bring personal discussions in between and maintained for a while, but then she was more caring and inquisitive about my personal things; and, when I slightly changed the tone then she becomes distant. I love her like anything ...have been in this relationship selflessly and never misbehaved except one time, i.e. college time our first fight. She takes her liberty to get angry at me, if the conversation is little disturbing for her. She is very strong in controlling her emotions and blocking herself from calling anyone she is angry with. She always more male friends with whom she will be very close and then starts talking negative about closest one. As per her she has not been in any romantic relationship ever, but when I look back we had our share of emotional moments though not physical ones. Every time patch up is done by me. During discussions it will come out that she was thinking of me but knew that i will come around. So far emothional part was always brought from my side and her side was little in more out types. I had this wish to be with her and take care of her since she is still unmarried and has health issues , ailing parents and one divorced brother. She is an enterprenure and I'm helping her with her business and she happily takes support from as its her right over me. I would like to take your opinion over the situation.
Ans: Thank you for sharing your deeply personal and intricate story. It's clear you’ve been carrying a significant emotional burden for many years. Your feelings of love, loyalty, and care for this woman are evident, but so too is the confusion and pain that this dynamic has caused. Let’s unravel this situation and explore possible paths forward.

Key Dynamics in Your Relationship
Patterns of Push and Pull:
This relationship seems to follow a cycle—closeness, emotional highs, and eventual withdrawal on her part. This push-and-pull dynamic can leave you feeling emotionally drained, constantly seeking validation and clarity from her while she retains control over the connection.

Her Stance on Romance:
She has repeatedly expressed aversion to romance, physical intimacy, or traditional ideas of love. Her actions may sometimes seem contradictory, but they align with her overall stance of maintaining control and boundaries that she’s comfortable with, even if it leaves you confused or hurt.

Your Role in the Dynamic:
You’ve shown immense patience, persistence, and care. However, it appears that you are consistently the one initiating reconnection, expressing emotions, and hoping for a future together. This imbalance may leave you feeling unfulfilled and questioning your self-worth.

Her Emotional Independence:
While she allows you into her professional life and accepts your support, she seems emotionally guarded, preferring to dictate the terms of the relationship. This indicates her desire to maintain independence, possibly due to personal values or past experiences.

Impact on You:
Being caught in this cycle for years has likely affected your emotional health, relationships, and sense of clarity. While you care deeply for her, the relationship seems to take more from you than it gives in return.

Questions to Reflect On
What Do You Truly Want?
Beyond your love for her, consider what you genuinely want and need in a relationship. Is it emotional reciprocity, stability, or clarity? Does this relationship align with those needs?

How Does This Dynamic Affect You?
Reflect on how the constant back-and-forth impacts your mental and emotional well-being. Are you truly happy, or are you clinging to the idea of what this relationship could be, rather than what it is?

What Role Do You Play in This Cycle?
Consider if your persistence is enabling this pattern. While your love and patience are admirable, they may also allow the dynamic to continue without resolution.

Recommendations
Establish Emotional Boundaries:
Protect your emotional energy by defining clear boundaries. For example, limit how much you give—emotionally or professionally—without receiving anything meaningful in return.

Communicate Differently:
The next time you speak with her, try expressing your feelings calmly and clearly, focusing on your needs. For example:

“I care deeply for you, but I feel our dynamic leaves me confused and emotionally drained. I need clarity about our relationship and whether we can truly have a future together.”
Detach with Care:
If her actions consistently indicate she cannot meet your emotional needs, it may be time to step back. Detachment doesn’t mean you stop caring; it means prioritizing your well-being and allowing space for clarity.

Focus on Yourself:
Your marriage, business, and emotional health are significant aspects of your life that need your attention. Consider working on your own happiness and independence outside this relationship. Seek counseling if needed to process the complexities of your feelings.

Recognize Patterns:
Notice the recurring themes in her behavior—shifting her stance, maintaining emotional distance, and expecting you to initiate reconciliation. Understanding these patterns can help you decide how much more you’re willing to invest emotionally.

A Gentle Reminder
Love and care are valuable gifts, but they must be balanced with mutual respect, clarity, and emotional safety. If a relationship consistently leaves you feeling unfulfilled or uncertain, it’s worth considering whether it’s meeting your deeper needs.

You deserve a relationship where your love and efforts are reciprocated. Take time to reflect and prioritize your well-being. If you need more guidance or a sounding board, I am here to support you.

Warm regards,
Ashish Sehgal

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 06, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello Mam, I'm married, 45 years self employed man. There was batch mate in my college, whom i was in love with. Due to some misunderstanding, we stopped talking for some time and I moved to other city for my job, but kept meeting her during my visits. I told everything i felt about her but she never accepted or refused. In general she used to tell everyone that she will never get married and she is aversive to physical relationship. Later on every 5 years or so we used to get in touch with each other and continue talking to each other and reach to a level where my feelings were at peak and then she will refuse or fight to move away.This was till I got married. After, 6 years of my marriage once we met in a shopping mall, in some other country, and exchanged pleasantries as well as contact; then started talking again. My marriage was/is a hell, so i had more to share with her, and she showed genuine interest in listening and advising. During this conversation our future also came in to discussion, due to extensive flashback discussion about our old times. She remembered every small big things except any event, where she has shown interest in our future together at personal level, but discussion of professional level association was intact. Eventually, one day she confirmed on we to be together, but not to over celebrate it and let it grow and work on execution ...means divorce part. There was an extreme sad event in my family, besides my daughter of 5 years, hence i had to postpone my divorce for sometime so that, family doesn't get two shocks at same time. In the mean time, we continued talking with each other and after 5-6 months, her statements started changing about future, and eventually she said there is no future and i cant talk to you since, you always bring romance in our conversation and I'm aversive to sex/love/romance type discussions. Then we again drifted apart for an year; and, this coming close to move away, happened 3 times in last two years. Recently we started again speaking and got in to business assignment together, and i decided not to bring personal discussions in between and maintained for a while, but then she was more caring and inquisitive about my personal things; and, when I slightly changed the tone then she becomes distant. I love her like anything ...have been in this relationship selflessly and never misbehaved except one time, i.e. college time our first fight. She takes her liberty to get angry at me, if the conversation is little disturbing for her. She is very strong in controlling her emotions and blocking herself from calling anyone she is angry with. She always more male friends with whom she will be very close and then starts talking negative about closest one. As per her she has not been in any romantic relationship ever, but when I look back we had our share of emotional moments though not physical ones. Every time patch up is done by me. During discussions it will come out that she was thinking of me but knew that i will come around. So far emothional part was always brought from my side and her side was little in more out types. I had this wish to be with her and take care of her since she is still unmarried and has health issues , ailing parents and one divorced brother. She is an enterprenure and I'm helping her with her business and she happily takes support from as its her right over me. I would like to take your opinion over the situation.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Even if your marriage is a lost cause, this lady in question seems pretty unsteady and unsettled in what she wants. Constant drams will only keep you on your toes and more than having any peace of mind, all you will be a part of will be high range emotions most times.
Do you want this kind of drama and pull and push behavior?
Do you want to be in an unsettled state with her being unsure most times?
Do you want to part of her moods where she calls the shots with little or no respect for what you want?

I guess you have all the answers but are willing to compromise it for reasons known best to you. At the end of the day, the decision on this will be yours...decide wisely knowing how it affects you or how it is straining you.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi , I am a professor mech engineer , after death of my wife and due to having 5 year girl baby I planned for 2 nd marriage as I live alone away from home town because my of job with my little baby . I accepted a widow having 2 child ,she was working in a govt job 250 km away , after ensuring and agreeing her possibility of transfer and job vacancy @govt office near my house and ensuring she agreed that she will come to live with me along with her 2 kids and my little baby as her trasfer was due in comming few months . We lived apart during her job at 250 km away.,while meeting on weekly offs 6 /7 time in 6 months , then she take 360 degree u turn and said she will not get job transfer to my place and get her trasfer in other dept. in same previous office. And started telling many reasons like she will loose her children's inheritance in her in-laws property ,she will loose promotion , kids Don't want trasfer , and said we will live apart forever . This was contradictory to earlier agreed things .and my my purpose to live in family with my baby not fulfilled , so after long ruckus ,I mutually got divorce from her , Then After divorce I decided to marry non working women having no child and don't expect child as I am @48 year old and tired of living alone and managing job ,girl , house chores . I married to a divorcee girl from Pune ,she was BA first year college drop out girl of 44 yr age after 6 months of long dating on week ends . During 6 months I tried to know her indepth but was don't used to talk much as I was trying to know her true nature, we visited many places ,movies . She seemed perfect as per my requirement of girl wanting no child , and she is house wife . after marriage she behave well for 1 st week ,then she started trouble to hate my baby ( became kaikai )on pety things , she want my baby to house chores at the cost of her important year of 10th std study . She don't liked me taking tution of girl , she didn't like if I help my girl any way . She don't like if I spent some money on my girl . She used to fight all night and don't let me sleep . Now she stated demanding that she want baby , though I was against and b4 marriage agreed to not have any more child due to old age ,cost ,and no personal time for self , then I agreed to have child but b4 that I got her and my fertility tested ,she had weak eggs and syst on her reproductive organs and doc warned to not go for pregnancy due to risk and probability of unhealthy baby birth , but she kept repeating That she want child we consulted 4 Drs. She used to fight and go to her mother's home for 2/4 months after living with me for 2/3 days only . Now she wants divorce , and asks me to keep my girl in hostel if I want her in my life . This Ramayan has left me baffled , What should I do ??? .....
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
The reason to marry for you mainly has been companionship, a mother for your daughter...
And marriage is not a transaction BUT a meeting of minds...when there is no compatibility, there is no space for agreeing on the same things or wanting to make things work which is possibly what has happened with your 2nd and 3rd marriage.
If you want this marriage to work, there has to be an equal commitment by both of you, so, start by emotionally bonding first. Slowly build on this by making goals for the marriage and the future...your only goal can't be mother for your child...not all women are going to readily accept this and some may even falter along the way. Allow the lady and your daughter to bond together for sometime so they develop a unique relationship...
Understand that transactional relationships do not last; so, invest enough time in building trust in that companionship for it to become something meaningful

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |677 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 07, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 06, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Dear Sir/Madam, I am 45YO working in GCC and She is 45YO working in India govt banking sector. We met through matrimonial site in 2009. We liked each other and decided to get marry. But due to some arrogent way of talking of her and her mother with my mother, which I didn't like at all. So before gettting finalising and engagement, I decided to go away from her without hurting and it took 5 month in Feb 2010. Actually I AM AGAINST HURTING ANYBODY'D'S HEART. So I made a situaton like that she rejected me. While meeting we both decided, even though, if we are not getting married with other we will be as friends in future. So I got married in 2011 and She got married in 2012. After our marriage we got busy in our married life and we were not able to contact with other for several years. But in second half of 2019 we again came into to contact over phone WA. Once she demanded make-up box and some chocolates from GCC, so I provided through courier. Then her demand increased with mobile recharge, Sani-pads, U/garment, gifts through Amezon, Flipkaut, Zamato, Swiggu etc etc.. One day she told she want to marry me, because there were physical quarrel with the husband and MIL, So she want to get divorse due to dosmetic violence between them. I avoided this topic as I am happy with my married life. Then 1 day she had some gmeil problem she was not receving email so she shared password. So I cleared all the promotions and unuseful stuff from her gmeil account. But I was shocked when I saw that she had saved all communication of having extramarital affair chats of WA with her office 2 different colleagues and, 1 Garage mechanic and College friend all were vulgar chats and different-different years. Especially all vulgar words and arrangement and planning made by her to meet in different room location. There I came to know why her husband is so physical quarrel with her. She had mentioned about husband activity of beating to her. And so both of them want to get divorse. But this all thing I kept it confidential with me from her. Let she admit some day. But I am still waiting. Now after 2021 all this has stopped because I convinced her and made her feel what she was doing after meeting her. She admitted her mistake and she promised that she will not go in wrong path. She also said it happened unknowingly she went with the flow. But She pleaded me and wants my Love and want to marry me privately and for her happiness, she in under divorce process. She proposed me for marriage in 2021 till now I have avoided with some excuses. Coming to the main topic, since 2021 to 2025, whenever I visit India, we meet each other, as I too have soft-corner for her and Love her as we were first Love of each other in 2009. Everytime when I inform her that I am coming to India, her dreams flies in sky and tells me come soon, I want to marry with You. And every time she ask something or the other gift as mentioned above. How should I get rid of this burden of over-expenses. Due to this it is difficult to manage my monthly expenses, means "The snake has to be killed and the stick should remain intact". Everytime I tells her this month not possible next month for sure, but again after 2-3 days she comes with new demand. And I am sure, if I broke this relationship she will again go to wrong path as she is getting divorce. Pls give some tips how to reply her to stop these expenses from me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I just want to tell you one thing: since you are married happily, it would be best if you limit your interactions with this woman. She is consistently showing interest in marrying you, asking for an inappropriate amount of gifts and has demands from you like one has from their partner. Everything seems a little off. And also, it is not your responsibility to keep her from going in the wrong direction. She is a grown adult and should be able to handle it herself. The best decision is to distance yourself from her. If you can’t, you might want to still set some boundaries like telling her that you cannot continue speaking to her if she keeps telling you that she wants to marry you. I am sure your wife also doesn’t appreciate it. Let her know that you are in a happy marriage and you are not comfortable with her behavior. Also, you have every right to say no to all her demands. I understand that you two have a friendship, but there should be boundaries even in that.

Hope this helps

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Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10893 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 15, 2025Hindi
Money
Good Morning Sir, I am having a Mutual Fund portfolio of 3.7 Crores, Savings account balance in India of 10 lacs, and PPF/Sukanya Samriddhi/NPS of around 30 lacs. My savings account in UAE has about 30 lacs. I have lost my job and am currently trying to get one. We will be in the UAE till July so that my daughter can complete her school year. If I get a job by then, it will be great; but if not, will I be able to retire with these funds? Please assume that the UAE savings account will be depleted by July during relocation. Kindly suggest.
Ans: Your financial discipline over many years deserves appreciation.
You stayed invested with patience.
You built wealth across countries.
This foundation gives you real confidence now.

» Current Life Stage and Context
– You are facing temporary job loss.
– You are still financially independent.
– UAE stay continues till July.
– Relocation costs are already planned.
– This phase needs calm decisions.
– Fear is natural, but clarity matters.

» Family Responsibilities Snapshot
– You have a school-going daughter.
– Education continuity is a priority.
– Stability for the child matters emotionally.
– Your planning already reflects responsibility.
– This strengthens your overall position.

» Asset Position Review
– Mutual fund portfolio is Rs.3.7 Crores.
– Indian savings account holds Rs.10 lacs.
– Long-term savings total about Rs.30 lacs.
– UAE savings will reduce to zero.
– Home ownership lowers future expenses.
– Net worth remains strong even after relocation.

» Liquidity and Cash Comfort
– Indian savings give immediate support.
– Mutual funds provide large liquidity.
– Withdrawals can be staggered wisely.
– Forced selling is avoidable.
– This protects capital during volatility.

» Job Loss Impact Assessment
– Income disruption affects confidence.
– It does not erase financial strength.
– You have time to decide.
– Rushed retirement decisions harm outcomes.
– Temporary gaps need flexible planning.

» Can You Retire If Job Does Not Come
– Retirement is possible with discipline.
– It requires expense control.
– It needs structured withdrawals.
– Lifestyle choices become important.
– Emotional readiness is equally critical.

» Early Retirement Reality Check
– Retirement at mid-forties is early.
– Corpus must last many decades.
– Inflation will work continuously.
– Growth assets cannot be abandoned.
– Balance is more important than returns.

» Role of Mutual Funds Going Forward
– Mutual funds remain core growth assets.
– Equity exposure should stay meaningful.
– Allocation should become more balanced.
– Risk control becomes more important now.
– Portfolio reviews must be regular.

» Why Actively Managed Funds Suit You
– Active funds respond to market stress.
– Fund managers adjust sector exposure.
– Valuation discipline is applied.
– Index funds fall fully with markets.
– Passive exposure increases drawdown risk.
– Active management supports smoother retirement.

» Managing Equity Volatility During Retirement
– Sudden market falls can hurt withdrawals.
– Selling equity during crashes damages corpus.
– Withdrawal planning must protect equity.
– Buffer assets reduce stress.
– This approach improves sustainability.

» Importance of Stable Assets
– Stable assets support monthly expenses.
– They reduce emotional reactions.
– They protect during market corrections.
– They fund short-term needs.
– This gives peace of mind.

» Role of Government-Backed Savings
– PPF and similar provide safety.
– Returns are predictable.
– Liquidity rules must be respected.
– These should not fund early expenses.
– They act as long-term protection.

» Expense Planning After Returning to India
– Living in owned home lowers costs.
– India expenses are lower than UAE.
– Lifestyle inflation must be avoided.
– Spending discipline extends corpus life.
– Regular tracking becomes essential.

» Education Planning for Your Daughter
– Education costs will rise steadily.
– This goal cannot face market risk alone.
– Dedicated allocation is required.
– Avoid mixing education money with retirement.
– Separate mental buckets improve clarity.

» Tax Considerations During Withdrawals
– Equity mutual fund withdrawals attract capital gains tax.
– Long-term gains above Rs.1.25 lakh are taxed.
– Short-term gains attract higher tax.
– Withdrawal sequencing reduces tax burden.
– Proper planning avoids unnecessary taxes.

» Health and Protection Planning
– Health insurance must be adequate.
– Employer cover may stop.
– Medical inflation is severe.
– Health costs can derail plans.
– Protection safeguards your corpus.

» Psychological Readiness for Retirement
– Retirement is not only financial.
– Loss of routine can disturb balance.
– Purpose keeps mind active.
– Part-time work can help.
– Engagement supports mental health.

» Semi-Retirement as a Practical Option
– Consulting reduces withdrawal pressure.
– Flexible work gives confidence.
– Income extends corpus life.
– Market volatility becomes easier to handle.
– This option offers balance.

» Time Advantage You Still Have
– You still have working years.
– One job changes everything positively.
– Corpus continues to compound.
– Do not rush permanent decisions.
– Allow time for clarity.

» Mistakes to Avoid Now
– Avoid panic selling.
– Avoid drastic asset changes.
– Avoid chasing guaranteed returns.
– Avoid emotional decisions.
– Stability protects wealth.

» Role of a Certified Financial Planner
– Helps structure withdrawals.
– Aligns assets with goals.
– Manages risk during uncertainty.
– Protects child education goals.
– Provides clarity and confidence.

» Final Insights
– Your financial base is strong.
– Retirement is possible with discipline.
– Job income adds comfort, not necessity.
– Balanced asset allocation is essential.
– Active fund management suits this stage.
– Emotional calm will protect decisions.
– Structured planning ensures long-term peace.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10893 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 15, 2025Hindi
Money
Good Morning Sir, I am having a Mutual Fund portfolio of 3.7 Crores, Savings account balance in India of 10 lacs, and PPF/Sukanya Samriddhi/NPS of around 30 lacs. My savings account in UAE has about 30 lacs. I have lost my job and am currently trying to get one. We will be in the UAE till July so that my daughter can complete her school year. If I get a job by then, it will be great; but if not, will I be able to retire with these funds? Please assume that the UAE savings account will be depleted by July during relocation. I have my own apartment in Delhi and present age is 46 with daughter age is 13 Kindly suggest.
Ans: Your discipline over years deserves appreciation.
You built wealth across phases.
You avoided lifestyle inflation.
You planned even while abroad.
This gives you strength now.
Job loss does not erase past discipline.

» Current Life Situation Assessment
– You are 46 years old.
– Your daughter is 13 years old.
– You are temporarily without income.
– UAE stay continues till July.
– Relocation costs are already considered.
– Emotional stress is natural now.

» Asset Snapshot and Financial Base
– Mutual fund portfolio is Rs.3.7 Crores.
– Indian savings account holds Rs.10 lacs.
– Long-term government-backed savings are Rs.30 lacs.
– UAE savings of Rs.30 lacs will deplete.
– You own a Delhi apartment.
– No mention of liabilities exists.

» Net Worth Strength Perspective
– Financial assets remain very strong.
– Market-linked assets dominate wealth.
– Liquidity exists even after relocation.
– Home ownership reduces living pressure.
– This is a solid base.
– Many retirees have far less.

» Employment Gap Impact Review
– Job loss impacts cash flow.
– It does not destroy wealth.
– Time gap creates anxiety.
– Planning reduces fear.
– Your corpus buys time.
– Decisions must remain calm.

» Key Question You Are Asking
– Can I retire if job fails.
– Can corpus last lifelong.
– Can child education be protected.
– Can lifestyle be sustained.
– Can risk be managed.
– These are valid concerns.

» Retirement Age and Horizon View
– Retirement at 46 is early.
– Life expectancy is long.
– Corpus must last decades.
– Inflation will work continuously.
– Growth assets remain essential.
– Protection planning becomes critical.

» Expense Reality After India Return
– Living in owned home helps.
– Rent expense becomes zero.
– India costs are lower than UAE.
– School expenses will continue.
– Lifestyle moderation may be required.
– Flexibility improves sustainability.

» Child Education Responsibility
– Daughter is 13 now.
– Higher education remains ahead.
– Education costs will rise.
– This cannot be compromised.
– Planning must ring-fence this goal.
– Separate allocation is necessary.

» Current Liquidity Comfort
– Indian savings give short-term support.
– Mutual funds give long-term strength.
– PPF and similar give safety.
– Liquidity is adequate now.
– Emergency comfort exists.
– Panic actions are avoidable.

» Can You Retire Immediately
– Technically possible with discipline.
– Practically requires lifestyle alignment.
– Emotionally may feel uncomfortable.
– Job income adds safety.
– Partial work may help.
– Full stop is not mandatory.

» Semi-Retirement as a Middle Path
– Consulting work can reduce pressure.
– Part-time roles give confidence.
– Income reduces withdrawal stress.
– Corpus continues compounding.
– Psychological comfort improves.
– This is often ideal.

» Withdrawal Risk Awareness
– Early retirement faces sequence risk.
– Market downturns can hurt withdrawals.
– Timing matters greatly.
– Structured withdrawal planning is critical.
– Random redemptions harm corpus.
– Discipline protects longevity.

» Mutual Fund Portfolio Role
– Mutual funds remain growth engine.
– They must be managed actively.
– Asset allocation matters more now.
– Aggression should slowly reduce.
– Quality focus becomes key.
– Overlapping exposure must be reviewed.

» Why Active Management Matters Now
– Active funds adjust during downturns.
– Valuations are monitored.
– Risk is controlled dynamically.
– Index exposure falls fully.
– Drawdowns can be harsh.
– Active oversight suits retirees better.

» Debt Allocation Importance
– Debt provides stability.
– Debt funds withdrawals calmly.
– Debt avoids forced equity selling.
– It smoothens cash flow.
– Peace of mind improves.
– Balance is essential now.

» Role of Government-Backed Savings
– PPF and similar give safety.
– They provide predictability.
– Liquidity rules must be respected.
– They support capital protection.
– Keep them untouched longer.
– They act as anchor.

» Managing Market Volatility Emotionally
– Job loss increases fear.
– Markets amplify emotions.
– Avoid reacting to headlines.
– Follow pre-set plan.
– Review annually only.
– Emotional discipline is wealth.

» Tax Awareness During Withdrawals
– Equity withdrawals attract capital gains tax.
– Long-term gains above Rs.1.25 lakh are taxed.
– Short-term gains attract higher tax.
– Withdrawal sequencing matters.
– Tax efficiency improves longevity.
– Planning avoids surprises.

» What You Should Avoid Now
– Avoid panic selling.
– Avoid liquidating entire equity.
– Avoid chasing guaranteed returns.
– Avoid lending informally.
– Avoid untested products.
– Simplicity protects capital.

» Health and Insurance Angle
– Health cover must be strong.
– Job-linked cover may end.
– Family protection is critical.
– Medical inflation is high.
– Review coverage immediately.
– This safeguards corpus.

» Lifestyle Adjustment Reality
– Retirement needs conscious spending.
– Wants must be filtered.
– Needs must be secured.
– Child education stays priority.
– Travel plans may adjust.
– Control gives confidence.

» Psychological Side of Early Retirement
– Identity loss may occur.
– Work gives structure.
– Social engagement matters.
– Purpose prevents anxiety.
– Financial independence is not idleness.
– Mental planning is vital.

» Time as Your Biggest Asset
– You still have years.
– Corpus can still grow.
– One good job changes picture.
– Do not rush decisions.
– Allow six to twelve months.
– Calm thinking improves outcomes.

» Role of a Certified Financial Planner
– Helps structure withdrawals.
– Aligns assets with life stages.
– Prevents emotional mistakes.
– Reviews asset allocation.
– Protects child goals.
– Adds clarity in uncertainty.

» Final Insights
– Your financial base is strong.
– Immediate retirement is possible with discipline.
– Job income adds safety and comfort.
– Semi-retirement is a balanced option.
– Child education must be ring-fenced.
– Active fund management suits your stage.
– Liquidity and debt bring stability.
– Patience and structure will protect your future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10893 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 15, 2025

Money
45 years of age, self employed. I am selling my flat and after paying all taxes/capital gains should have roughly about 70 lakhs to invest. I already have 65 lakhs in MF, 95 lakhs portfolio in equity and also have couple more real estate properties where i fetch about 1 lakh.per month rental income. My monthly earning currently is irratic and annually around 10-12lakhs. No EMI , LOANS ETC. outgoing are SIP OF 60000, anything surplus I invest in equity. Child is 8 years and his education, future education, current fees all are made up for as mentioned and my wife together do SIP OF 110000 towards the same. My question is my wife and my investments are all exposed to MF AND equity. NO FD, NO OTHER diversified investments. So this income from sale of flat, do we invest in markets again or any other options are available. We have no liabilities , hence can take medium to agressive risks .
Ans: Your discipline and clarity deserve appreciation.
You have built assets patiently.
You avoided unnecessary debt wisely.
Your questions show maturity and foresight.
This is a strong financial position already.
Now refinement matters more than expansion.

» Your Current Financial Strength
– You are 45 years old.
– You are self-employed with flexibility.
– Annual income is irregular but healthy.
– No loans or EMIs exist.
– Rental income provides stability.
– This is a strong base.

» Asset Overview and Balance
– Mutual fund exposure is significant.
– Direct equity exposure is also large.
– Real estate exposure already exists.
– Child education planning is well handled.
– SIP discipline is excellent.
– Overall net worth is strong.

» Liquidity and Cash Flow Position
– Rental income gives steady monthly cash.
– Business income is uneven.
– SIP commitments are comfortably met.
– Surplus is invested regularly.
– Liquidity buffer needs assessment.
– Emergency comfort matters for self-employed.

» Risk Capacity Versus Risk Comfort
– Risk capacity is clearly high.
– Risk comfort also seems high.
– However concentration risk exists.
– Markets dominate portfolio exposure.
– Volatility impact must be evaluated.
– Diversification is the real concern.

» Understanding Concentration Risk
– Equity and mutual funds move together.
– Market downturns affect both sharply.
– Psychological stress can increase.
– Liquidity may dry temporarily.
– Long-term returns remain good.
– But timing risk exists.

» Your Core Question Clarified
– You are not asking about returns.
– You are asking about balance.
– You want intelligent diversification.
– You want risk-managed growth.
– You want capital protection layers.
– This is correct thinking.

» Should the Rs.70 Lakhs Enter Markets Fully
– Putting all again into markets increases concentration.
– It magnifies timing risk.
– Even strong investors need balance.
– Markets may not always cooperate.
– Partial allocation is sensible.
– Phased deployment is wiser.

» Importance of Staggered Investment
– Lump sum market entry carries timing risk.
– Volatility can impact short-term value.
– Phased investing smoothens entry.
– Emotion management improves.
– Decision quality stays high.
– Discipline matters even for experienced investors.

» Role of Debt-Oriented Instruments
– Debt provides stability to portfolio.
– Debt reduces overall volatility.
– Debt supports rebalancing later.
– Debt gives liquidity comfort.
– Returns are predictable.
– Peace of mind improves decision making.

» Why Some Debt Exposure Is Necessary
– You are self-employed.
– Income is irregular.
– Markets can fall anytime.
– Debt cushions lifestyle needs.
– Avoid forced equity selling.
– This protects long-term wealth.

» Debt Mutual Funds Perspective
– Debt funds offer flexibility.
– They are more tax-efficient than fixed deposits.
– Liquidity is better.
– Suitable for medium-term goals.
– Risk varies by fund quality.
– Selection must be conservative.

» Avoiding Fixed Deposits Blindly
– Fixed deposits lock money.
– Tax efficiency is poor.
– Returns barely beat inflation.
– Liquidity may have penalties.
– Better alternatives exist.
– Structure matters more than familiarity.

» Hybrid and Balanced Allocation Thought
– Hybrid funds mix growth and stability.
– Volatility remains controlled.
– Suitable for capital protection.
– Good parking for part capital.
– Helps rebalancing automatically.
– Useful during uncertain markets.

» Why Actively Managed Funds Suit You
– Active managers adjust with cycles.
– Valuations matter to them.
– Sector rotation is managed.
– Downside protection improves.
– Concentration risk reduces.
– Passive exposure lacks this flexibility.

» Disadvantages of Index Exposure
– Index follows markets blindly.
– No valuation control exists.
– Drawdowns are full impact.
– Recovery takes patience.
– Emotional stress increases.
– Active management adds value here.

» Existing Equity Portfolio Review Thought
– Equity exposure is already high.
– Additional equity should be selective.
– Avoid duplication across holdings.
– Style diversification matters.
– Avoid over-aggression now.
– Capital preservation gains importance.

» Asset Allocation Direction Suggested
– Equity should still remain majority.
– Debt should act as stabiliser.
– Allocation must be intentional.
– Not reactive to market moods.
– Review annually.
– Adjust gradually with age.

» Emergency and Opportunity Fund
– Self-employed professionals need buffers.
– At least one year expenses covered.
– This avoids panic during downturns.
– Opportunity buying also becomes possible.
– Confidence improves decision making.
– Liquidity brings power.

» Role of Alternative Strategies
– Avoid unregulated products.
– Avoid opaque structures.
– Simplicity works best.
– Transparency builds trust.
– Liquidity should not be compromised.
– Focus on controllable risks.

» Tax Efficiency Awareness
– Capital gains planning matters.
– Phased investing helps tax management.
– Debt funds taxed per slab.
– Equity taxed on withdrawal.
– Withdrawal planning matters later.
– Structure supports efficiency.

» Retirement Planning Angle
– Retirement is still distant.
– But preparation must start.
– Equity will power long-term growth.
– Debt will stabilise income later.
– Balanced build-up helps future SWP.
– This foresight is valuable.

» Child Goal Already Secured
– Education planning is strong.
– SIP discipline is excellent.
– No need to disturb this.
– Avoid overlapping investments.
– Keep child goal separate.
– This reduces confusion later.

» Behavioural Discipline Strength
– You already invest consistently.
– You avoid panic actions.
– You reinvest surplus logically.
– This is rare.
– Maintain this strength.
– Do not complicate unnecessarily.

» What Not to Do With Rs.70 Lakhs
– Do not rush entire amount.
– Do not chase trending assets.
– Do not over-diversify blindly.
– Do not keep idle long-term.
– Do not ignore risk layering.
– Avoid emotional decisions.

» Suggested Deployment Philosophy
– Divide money by purpose.
– Some for stability.
– Some for growth.
– Some for liquidity.
– Invest gradually.
– Review annually.

» Role of a Certified Financial Planner
– Helps structure allocation.
– Prevents overexposure mistakes.
– Aligns with life goals.
– Manages behavioural risks.
– Reviews objectively.
– Adds long-term value.

» Final Insights
– Your financial base is strong.
– Concentration risk is the key concern.
– Full market reinvestment needs caution.
– Partial debt allocation improves balance.
– Phased investing reduces timing risk.
– Active management suits your profile.
– Liquidity buffer is essential.
– Structured diversification will protect and grow wealth.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10893 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 15, 2025

Money
I am 54 years old, my monthly salary is 40 K, my liability 6 lakhs loan liability and personal from 2 lakhs in ICICI bank, and 5000 two wheeler loan from hdfc and another loan of Rs, 35000 from LIC Policy pledged. I invested Rs. 58000 in stocks and Rs. 15000 in mutual funds and I have owned a residential house in kochi, Kerala No Other Savings. Pls. advise to how can I some savings at the age of 60
Ans: You have shown courage by asking this question honestly.
Many people avoid facing numbers at this age.
You are taking responsibility now.
That itself is a strong positive step.
There is still time to improve outcomes.
With discipline, progress is possible.

» Current Age and Time Availability
– You are 54 years old now.
– Retirement planning window is around six years.
– Time is limited but not over.
– Focus must shift to stability and control.
– Aggressive risks should reduce gradually.
– Consistency matters more than return chasing.

» Income Position Assessment
– Monthly salary is Rs.40,000.
– Income appears fixed and predictable.
– Salary growth may be limited now.
– Planning should assume stable income only.
– Avoid depending on uncertain future hikes.
– Savings must come from discipline.

» Expense Awareness and Reality
– Expenses were not detailed fully.
– Loans indicate cash flow pressure.
– Lifestyle spending must be reviewed honestly.
– Small savings matter at this stage.
– Leakages need strict control.
– Tracking expenses becomes critical now.

» Loan and Liability Overview
– Total loan burden is significant.
– Personal loan of Rs.6 lakh exists.
– Additional Rs.2 lakh personal loan exists.
– Two-wheeler loan EMI of Rs.5,000 runs.
– LIC policy loan of Rs.35,000 exists.
– Multiple loans increase stress.

» Interest Cost Impact
– Personal loans carry high interest.
– Two-wheeler loan also costs more.
– LIC policy loan reduces policy benefits.
– High interest erodes future savings.
– Loan control must be first priority.
– Returns cannot beat high interest easily.

» Asset Position Overview
– Residential house in Kochi is owned.
– House gives living security.
– No rental income assumed currently.
– House should not be sold for retirement.
– Emotional and practical value is high.
– Treat it as safety asset.

» Investment Snapshot
– Equity stock investment is Rs.58,000.
– Mutual fund investment is Rs.15,000.
– Total financial investments are very low.
– This limits compounding benefits.
– However, starting now still helps.
– Even small steps matter.

» Liquidity and Emergency Status
– No clear emergency fund exists.
– Loans indicate past emergencies.
– Lack of emergency fund causes borrowing.
– This cycle must stop.
– Emergency fund is foundation.
– Without it, savings break repeatedly.

» Priority Reset Required
– Retirement savings come after stability.
– First priority is cash flow control.
– Second priority is loan reduction.
– Third priority is emergency fund.
– Fourth priority is retirement investing.
– Order matters greatly now.

» Debt Reduction Strategy Importance
– Reducing loans gives guaranteed returns.
– Emotional relief also improves discipline.
– Fewer EMIs free monthly cash.
– Cash can redirect to savings.
– Retirement planning needs free cash flow.
– Debt blocks future progress.

» Which Loan to Target First
– Focus on highest interest loan first.
– Personal loans usually cost the most.
– Two-wheeler loan can follow.
– LIC policy loan should close early.
– Policy value should recover.
– Avoid new borrowing strictly.

» LIC Policy Review
– LIC policy is pledged currently.
– This reduces maturity value.
– Many LIC policies give low returns.
– Insurance and investment are mixed here.
– Such policies hurt retirement efficiency.
– Review purpose of this policy carefully.

» Action on LIC Policy
– If LIC is investment-oriented, reconsider.
– Surrender may free funds.
– Loan can be cleared using surrender value.
– Remaining amount can rebuild savings.
– Policy continuation must justify benefits.
– Emotional attachment should be avoided.

» Emergency Fund Creation
– Emergency fund should cover basic expenses.
– Target at least six months needs.
– Start with small monthly amount.
– Keep it separate from investments.
– This prevents future borrowing.
– Stability improves mental peace.

» Retirement Goal Reality Check
– Retirement age is close.
– Corpus building time is short.
– Expectations must stay realistic.
– Focus on supplementary income creation.
– Avoid risky return promises.
– Capital protection becomes important.

» Role of Equity at This Stage
– Equity still has a role.
– But exposure must be limited.
– Volatility can hurt near retirement.
– Balanced approach is needed.
– Equity for growth.
– Debt for stability.

» Mutual Fund Strategy Thought Process
– Mutual funds offer flexibility.
– SIP helps discipline monthly savings.
– Actively managed funds suit this phase.
– Fund managers adjust risk dynamically.
– This protects downside better.
– Index funds lack such control.

» Why Index Funds Are Risky Now
– Index funds fall fully with markets.
– No protection during market crashes.
– Near retirement, recovery time is less.
– Emotional panic risk increases.
– Active funds manage risk better.
– Stability matters more than matching index.

» Direct Funds Versus Regular Funds
– Direct funds need strong self-discipline.
– Wrong fund choice can hurt badly.
– No guidance during market stress.
– Regular funds offer support.
– Certified Financial Planner guidance helps.
– Behaviour management is crucial now.

» Monthly Savings Possibility
– Even Rs.3,000 matters now.
– Start small but stay consistent.
– Increase amount after loan closure.
– Automate savings immediately after salary.
– Avoid waiting for surplus.
– Surplus never comes automatically.

» Expense Rationalisation Steps
– Review subscriptions and discretionary spends.
– Reduce non-essential expenses.
– Delay lifestyle upgrades.
– Focus on needs over wants.
– Every saved rupee counts.
– Discipline builds confidence.

» Asset Allocation Approach
– Majority should be stable assets.
– Smaller portion in growth assets.
– Avoid concentration risk.
– Do not chase trending stocks.
– Consistency beats speculation.
– Preservation becomes key now.

» Stock Investment Review
– Existing stocks need careful review.
– Avoid frequent trading.
– High risk stocks should reduce gradually.
– Capital protection matters now.
– Reinvest proceeds wisely.
– Emotional decisions must stop.

» Retirement Income Planning Thought
– Retirement income must be predictable.
– Monthly cash flow is required.
– Capital should last longer.
– Avoid lump sum withdrawals.
– Planning must support longevity.
– Health costs may rise later.

» Health Insurance Importance
– Medical expenses rise with age.
– Adequate health insurance is essential.
– This protects retirement savings.
– Avoid policy gaps.
– Review coverage annually.
– Health shocks destroy savings fast.

» Tax Efficiency Consideration
– Tax should be considered carefully.
– Mutual funds offer tax efficiency.
– Gains taxed only on withdrawal.
– Equity gains have specific rules.
– Debt gains taxed as per slab.
– Planning reduces unnecessary tax.

» Behavioural Discipline Required
– Market volatility will test patience.
– Avoid panic selling.
– Avoid greed-driven buying.
– Stick to chosen path.
– Annual review is sufficient.
– Emotional control is critical.

» Role of Side Income
– Explore small side income options.
– Skill-based work can help.
– Even small extra income helps.
– Direct it fully into savings.
– Do not increase lifestyle.
– Purpose is retirement security.

» Family Communication
– Family should know limitations.
– Set realistic expectations together.
– Avoid financial surprises later.
– Transparency reduces stress.
– Shared responsibility helps discipline.
– Support improves success chances.

» Common Mistakes to Avoid
– Chasing high return promises.
– Ignoring debt problem.
– Using retirement money for emergencies.
– Frequent portfolio changes.
– Delaying action further.
– Comparing with others.

» Psychological Aspect
– Guilt about late start is normal.
– Do not dwell on past.
– Focus on controllable actions now.
– Small wins build confidence.
– Progress matters more than perfection.
– Hope must stay alive.

» What Success Looks Like Now
– Reduced debt burden.
– Emergency fund in place.
– Regular monthly savings habit.
– Controlled risk exposure.
– Predictable retirement income support.
– Peace of mind.

» Final Insights
– You are late but not helpless.
– Debt reduction is first priority.
– Emergency fund is essential.
– LIC policy needs careful review.
– Mutual funds can support retirement.
– Active management suits your stage.
– Discipline matters more than amount.
– With steady effort, improvement is possible.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10893 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 15, 2025

Money
can anyone suggest some good mutual funds to invest ?
Ans: It is good you are asking this question.
Many people invest blindly without understanding.
Your intent shows responsibility and awareness.
This is the right starting point.
Mutual funds work best with clarity.
I appreciate your willingness to learn.

» Understanding the Real Question
– You are not asking for returns alone.
– You are asking for safety and growth.
– You want confidence in decisions.
– You want fewer mistakes.
– This mindset is very important.
– Mutual funds need goal-based thinking.

» Why “Good Mutual Funds” Is a Relative Term
– There is no single best fund.
– Suitability matters more than popularity.
– Age changes risk tolerance.
– Income stability matters.
– Time horizon matters greatly.
– Emotional comfort also matters.

» Role of a Certified Financial Planner
– A Certified Financial Planner matches funds to goals.
– Random suggestions often fail.
– Personal context decides suitability.
– Fund selection is not guessing.
– It is a structured process.
– Guidance prevents costly mistakes.

» First Step Before Choosing Any Fund
– Identify your goal clearly.
– Short term goals differ from long term.
– Retirement goals need stability.
– Wealth creation needs patience.
– Emergency money should stay separate.
– Mixing goals creates confusion.

» Importance of Time Horizon
– Less than three years needs safety.
– Three to seven years needs balance.
– More than seven years allows growth focus.
– Time absorbs market volatility.
– Longer time reduces risk.
– Short time increases uncertainty.

» Understanding Risk Properly
– Risk is not loss alone.
– Risk is emotional panic also.
– Wrong fund causes sleepless nights.
– Panic selling destroys wealth.
– Right fund keeps you calm.
– Calm investors earn better returns.

» Why Actively Managed Funds Matter
– Markets change constantly.
– Companies rise and fall.
– Active managers track these changes.
– They reduce exposure during stress.
– They increase quality holdings.
– This flexibility protects capital.

» Disadvantages of Index Funds
– Index funds blindly follow markets.
– No downside protection exists.
– Full fall happens during crashes.
– Recovery takes time.
– Near goals, this hurts badly.
– Active funds manage risk better.

» Importance of Asset Allocation
– Do not put everything in equity.
– Debt provides stability.
– Equity provides growth.
– Balance reduces volatility.
– Allocation should change with age.
– This improves long-term success.

» Equity Mutual Fund Categories Explained
– Large-focused funds invest in stable companies.
– Mid-focused funds aim higher growth.
– Smaller companies bring higher volatility.
– Flexi-style funds adjust across sizes.
– Balanced style funds mix debt and equity.
– Each serves a different purpose.

» When to Use Large-Focused Equity Funds
– Suitable for conservative investors.
– Suitable for beginners.
– Suitable near retirement.
– Volatility remains lower.
– Growth is steady.
– Confidence remains higher.

» When to Use Mid-Focused Equity Funds
– Suitable for longer horizons.
– Suitable for moderate risk takers.
– Returns can be higher.
– Falls can be sharp sometimes.
– Requires patience.
– SIP helps manage volatility.

» When to Use Smaller Company Focused Funds
– Only for long horizons.
– Only for high risk tolerance.
– Not suitable near goals.
– Volatility is very high.
– Returns fluctuate widely.
– Allocation should be limited.

» Role of Flexi-Style Equity Funds
– Managers move across market sizes.
– They respond to valuations.
– They reduce concentration risk.
– Suitable for uncertain markets.
– Good core holding.
– Useful across life stages.

» Balanced Style Funds Explained
– Mix of equity and debt exists.
– Volatility is lower.
– Returns are smoother.
– Suitable for conservative investors.
– Suitable near retirement.
– Provides income stability.

» Debt Mutual Fund Understanding
– Debt funds invest in fixed income instruments.
– Returns are more stable.
– Risk depends on credit quality.
– Short duration suits safety needs.
– Long duration suits interest rate cycles.
– Selection must be careful.

» Why Debt Funds Matter
– They reduce overall portfolio risk.
– They provide predictable returns.
– They help during market crashes.
– They support regular withdrawals.
– They improve sleep quality.
– They bring balance.

» Tax Aspect Awareness
– Equity gains have holding period rules.
– Long term equity gains have lower tax.
– Short term gains attract higher tax.
– Debt gains taxed as per slab.
– Holding period planning reduces tax.
– Withdrawal planning matters.

» SIP Versus Lump Sum
– SIP builds discipline.
– SIP reduces timing risk.
– Lump sum suits surplus money.
– Market timing is difficult.
– SIP suits salaried investors.
– Consistency matters more than timing.

» Why Regular Funds Are Better for Most
– Regular funds provide guidance.
– Behaviour management is included.
– Review support is available.
– Panic decisions are reduced.
– CFP guidance adds value.
– Cost difference is justified often.

» Disadvantages of Direct Funds
– No handholding during volatility.
– Wrong allocation mistakes occur.
– Investors panic during falls.
– Discipline breaks easily.
– Mistakes cost more than savings.
– Support matters more than cost.

» Portfolio Construction Principles
– Limit number of funds.
– Avoid duplication.
– Diversify across styles.
– Align funds with goals.
– Review annually only.
– Avoid frequent changes.

» How Many Funds Are Enough
– Too many funds confuse tracking.
– Four to six funds are enough.
– Each fund must have a role.
– Overlapping funds reduce efficiency.
– Simplicity improves discipline.
– Control improves results.

» Common Mistakes Investors Make
– Chasing recent performance.
– Following social media tips.
– Switching frequently.
– Investing without goals.
– Ignoring asset allocation.
– Stopping SIP during downturns.

» Behaviour Is More Important Than Funds
– Good behaviour beats good products.
– Staying invested matters most.
– Panic destroys compounding.
– Patience builds wealth.
– Discipline creates results.
– Confidence grows over time.

» Role of Review and Rebalancing
– Portfolio needs periodic review.
– Life changes need adjustments.
– Risk increases with market rise.
– Rebalancing restores balance.
– Annual review is enough.
– Over-monitoring creates stress.

» Age-Based Allocation Thought
– Younger investors can take higher equity.
– Middle age needs balanced approach.
– Near retirement needs stability.
– Allocation must reduce risk gradually.
– This protects capital.
– Longevity risk increases later.

» Emotional Side of Investing
– Fear and greed influence decisions.
– Market news creates panic.
– Discipline reduces emotional damage.
– Guidance provides reassurance.
– Staying calm is crucial.
– Long-term view wins.

» Importance of Emergency Fund
– Emergency fund protects investments.
– It avoids forced selling.
– Keep it separate from mutual funds.
– Liquidity matters here.
– Peace of mind improves discipline.
– This is foundation step.

» Goal-Based Investing Is Key
– Each goal needs its own strategy.
– Education goals differ from retirement.
– Short goals need safety.
– Long goals allow growth.
– Mixing goals causes confusion.
– Structure brings clarity.

» Final Insights
– Good mutual funds depend on your goals.
– Actively managed funds suit most investors.
– Asset allocation matters more than fund names.
– Discipline beats market timing.
– Guidance reduces costly mistakes.
– Start with clarity and patience.
– Stay consistent and review annually.
– This approach builds long-term wealth.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10893 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 15, 2025Hindi
Money
My friend age is 39 salary is 70000 loan 100000 with 1200 EMI had 5.5 lakh pf and yearly lic policies of 45000 had own house worth 40 lakhs and one land worth 15 lakhs nearly son age is 4 how to invest for education
Ans: Your friend has taken a responsible step by thinking early.
Planning for a child’s education shows care and foresight.
Starting now gives strong advantage.
Time is the biggest strength here.
This deserves appreciation and encouragement.

» Family and Life Stage Assessment
– Your friend is 39 years old.
– Child is only 4 years old.
– Education goal is 14 to 18 years away.
– This gives long investment runway.
– Long horizon allows growth focus.
– Early planning reduces pressure later.

» Income and Stability Review
– Monthly salary is Rs.70,000.
– Income seems stable currently.
– EMI burden is very low.
– Loan amount is manageable.
– Cash flow pressure appears limited.
– This supports long-term investing.

» Existing Asset Overview
– Provident fund value is Rs.5.5 lakh.
– Own house provides residential security.
– Land holding adds balance sheet strength.
– Physical assets already exist.
– Education funding should stay financial.
– Avoid mixing goals with properties.

» Current Liability Position
– Loan amount is only Rs.1 lakh.
– EMI is Rs.1,200 monthly.
– Debt stress is minimal.
– No urgent prepayment pressure exists.
– Liquidity remains comfortable.
– This supports regular investments.

» Child Education Cost Reality
– Education costs rise faster than inflation.
– Higher education costs are unpredictable.
– Foreign education increases costs sharply.
– Professional courses cost much more.
– Planning should assume higher expenses.
– Conservative assumptions protect future.

» Time Horizon Advantage
– Child has 14 plus years.
– Long horizon favours equity exposure.
– Short-term volatility becomes irrelevant.
– Compounding works best over time.
– Discipline matters more than timing.
– Starting early reduces monthly burden.

» Goal Segregation Importance
– Education goal must stay separate.
– Retirement goals should not mix.
– House and land should remain untouched.
– Education money needs liquidity later.
– Clear buckets avoid confusion.
– This brings clarity and focus.

» Provident Fund Role Clarification
– PF is meant for retirement.
– Avoid using PF for education.
– PF offers safety, not flexibility.
– Withdrawal later affects retirement comfort.
– Let PF compound peacefully.
– Education should have its own plan.

» LIC Policy Assessment
– LIC policies are long-term commitments.
– Many LIC policies give low returns.
– Education goal needs higher growth.
– Insurance and investment should not mix.
– Review policy purpose carefully.
– Education planning needs efficiency.

» Action on LIC Policies
– If LIC is investment oriented, review seriously.
– Such policies often underperform inflation.
– Education goal needs stronger growth engine.
– Consider surrender after policy review.
– Redirect money into mutual funds.
– This improves goal probability.

» Risk Capacity Versus Risk Appetite
– Income stability supports equity exposure.
– Child’s age supports growth focus.
– Emotional comfort still matters.
– Portfolio should avoid extreme swings.
– Balance reduces regret during downturns.
– Discipline ensures long-term success.

» Asset Allocation Thought Process
– Education goal allows higher equity allocation.
– Small debt portion adds stability.
– Allocation should change near goal.
– Gradual de-risking protects corpus.
– No sudden changes later.
– Planning must be dynamic.

» Why Mutual Funds Fit Education Goals
– Mutual funds offer growth potential.
– They allow disciplined monthly investing.
– SIP suits salary earners well.
– Flexibility exists for top-ups.
– Liquidity is available when needed.
– Transparency improves understanding.

» Importance of Active Management
– Active funds manage downside risks.
– Fund managers respond to market changes.
– Education corpus cannot afford blind tracking.
– Index investing lacks downside control.
– Active approach suits long-term goals.
– Flexibility is critical here.

» Why Index Funds Are Not Ideal
– Index funds follow markets mechanically.
– They fall fully during market crashes.
– No protection during extreme volatility.
– Education timeline cannot wait always.
– Active funds adjust allocations actively.
– This reduces emotional stress.

» Monthly Investment Discipline
– SIP builds habit and discipline.
– Small amounts grow meaningfully over time.
– Step-up SIP improves future corpus.
– Salary growth supports step-up.
– Consistency matters more than amount.
– Missed months reduce compounding.

» Emergency Fund Before Education Investing
– Emergency fund should exist first.
– At least six months expenses recommended.
– This avoids breaking education investments.
– Emergencies are unpredictable.
– Financial shocks derail long-term plans.
– Stability supports discipline.

» Insurance Protection Check
– Adequate term insurance is critical.
– Child’s education depends on income.
– Insurance protects goal continuity.
– Medical insurance protects savings.
– Without protection, plans collapse.
– Risk management comes first.

» Tax Efficiency Perspective
– Education investing should consider tax.
– Mutual funds offer tax-efficient growth.
– Tax applies only on realised gains.
– Equity gains have specific rules.
– Planning improves post-tax outcomes.
– Tax should not drive decisions alone.

» Behavioural Aspects of Education Planning
– Market corrections will happen.
– Panic reactions harm long-term goals.
– Education planning needs patience.
– Annual review is enough.
– Avoid daily portfolio tracking.
– Trust the process.

» Role of Land and House
– House provides living security.
– Land is illiquid for education needs.
– Avoid selling assets for education.
– Forced sales reduce value.
– Education funds must be liquid.
– Separate assets reduce stress.

» Periodic Review and Rebalancing
– Review education plan yearly.
– Increase investments with income growth.
– Reduce risk near goal.
– Shift gradually to safer assets.
– Avoid last-minute surprises.
– Discipline ensures success.

» Child Education Milestones Planning
– School education costs come first.
– Graduation costs come later.
– Post-graduation may need larger funds.
– Plan for multiple stages.
– Avoid lump-sum burden later.
– Stagger planning reduces stress.

» Emotional Satisfaction Aspect
– Education planning gives confidence.
– Parents sleep better with clarity.
– Child benefits from better choices.
– Financial clarity improves family harmony.
– Less stress improves health.
– Planning improves overall life quality.

» Role of Certified Financial Planner
– Personalised planning improves outcomes.
– Risk comfort differs per family.
– Cash flow analysis matters.
– Goal prioritisation avoids conflicts.
– Periodic guidance improves discipline.
– Holistic approach protects all goals.

» Common Mistakes to Avoid
– Starting too late.
– Relying only on LIC policies.
– Using PF for education.
– Chasing high returns blindly.
– Ignoring inflation impact.
– Avoiding reviews.

» Long-Term Discipline Reminder
– Education planning is a marathon.
– Short-term noise should be ignored.
– Time corrects many mistakes.
– Discipline beats intelligence here.
– Patience builds strong corpus.
– Calmness protects decisions.

» Final Insights
– Your friend has strong starting position.
– Early planning gives big advantage.
– Child’s age supports growth focus.
– Mutual funds suit education goals well.
– LIC policies need careful review.
– Insurance protection is essential.
– Discipline and reviews ensure success.
– With proper structure, education goals are achievable.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Reetika

Reetika Sharma  |425 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 15, 2025

Money
i am a 65 year old person at present working in a company as advisor with Rs.2,00,000/-month remuneration.My son is studying 1st year B.Tech.My wife is a home maker.I am having 2 apartments on my name worth approx.2 crores.MY wife is a single child to my in laws and i stay in my mother in law's house as my wife has to take care of her. I am having a plot which costs about 75 lakhs rupees.I am having PPF amount Rs,25 lakhs in my account and still account is not closed.I may be having a cash of Rs.20 lakhs approx.in various forms.I am havinga stocks porfolio worth Rs30 lakhs.I am giving you my MF sips in various forms.The MFs amount is to the tune of Rs.80 lakhs. Fund Name Category SIP Amount % of Portfolio Motilal Oswal Large Cap Fund Large Cap ₹15,000 10.3% Nippon India Large Cap Fund Large Cap ₹13,000 8.9% Total Large Cap ₹28,000 19.2% HDFC Midcap Fund Mid Cap ₹7,500 5.1% Edelweiss Mid Cap Fund Mid Cap ₹31,000 21.2% Total Mid Cap ₹38,500 26.3% SBI Small Cap Fund Small Cap ₹3,500 2.4% Nippon India Small Cap Fund Small Cap ₹2,000 1.4% Total Small Cap ₹5,500 3.8% Parag Parikh Flexicap Fund Flexi Cap ₹38,500 26.3% HDFC Focused Fund Focused ₹7,000 4.8% Mirae Asset Large & Midcap Fund Large & Mid Cap ₹2,500 1.7% Total Diversified Equity ₹48,000 32.8% Canara Robeco Multi Asset Multi Asset ₹1,500 1.0% HDFC Balanced Advantage Fund BAF ₹10,000 6.8% Total Hybrid / Debt-Oriented ₹11,500 7.9% Tata Nifty Capital Markets Index Sectoral (Financial Services) ₹2,000 1.4% Nippon India Banking & Financial Services Sectoral (Financial Services) ₹1,500 1.0% Total Sectoral ₹3,500 2.4% Total SIP amount is approx.Rs.1.5 lakhs / month . I am having monthly sips for SBI small cap,nippon india small cap, dsp small cap rs.5000/-each in addition to above SIPs.My total MFs amount is approx.rs.75 lakhs. Though i am not sure how many months my assignment continue, immediately there is no threat.at present my health only is the criteria to continue and i may continue for maximum of one year.MY wife also may be having cash in various forms to the tune of Rs.50 lakhs. This is my financial status. Kindly guide me for a better and remunerative planning.Best Regards.
Ans: Hi Nadakuduru,

Your overall assets are good but need some proper realignment wrt you what all you mentioned. Let us have a detailed look:

- Considering that you will work for a year or so, you need to have proper alignment of your current assets in liquid form.
- Close your PPF account upon maturity and park it in debt MFs.
- Direct stock investment is way too risky. Shift that amount in equity mutual funds to fund you when you stop working.
- Make a FD of 20 lakhs cash that you have for your emergency requirement.
- Your current SIPs are highly overdiversified and overlapped. A portfolio like this never gives a good return. Hence work with a professional to get a good portfolio.
A DIY portfolio like yours can break your overall investments. Do not do any large investments like these without proper guidance.
- Hence stop current SIPS and take professional's help.

Do consult a professional Certified Financial Planner - a CFP who can guide you with exact funds to invest in keeping in mind your age, requirements, financial goals and risk profile. A CFP periodically reviews your portfolio and suggest any amendments to be made, if required.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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