Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 03, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Pratik Question by Pratik on Mar 02, 2023Hindi
Listen

I'M 40 years old man, i have had troubled childhood. I faced abuse from my elder brother who later on developed mental health issues whiich broughg lot of stress to the family. I worked very hard to achieve reasonable professional success but my personal life has been very difficult. I got married with lot of difficulty despite being well placed professionally and decent looks. It was an arranged marriage but things went bad after a year. I caught my wife having an affair with her ex but i fogave her for the sake of myndaugher who was just 1 year old then. She keept on having flings with gym instructor and later on her colleagues which i dont have any proof of. She would humilate me in front of my maid driver and other people. But i wanted ti save my marriage for the sake of my daughter who was only 4-5 years old then. Finally she started asking me for divorce after every trivial fights. Fed up i finally agreed and we separated in 2021 November. During that time i came in contact with my school friend. She proposed to me during our school days but due to stress at home and other issues i said no but i always liked her. When we started talking around December 2021 and we realized we still love each other after 20 years. But problem was though i was divorced she was still married and she is from a different religion. She is trying hard to get separated from her husband but her family being very conservative is not allowing her to do so. I'm stuck with her emotionally. Now my ex-wife has started approaching me for reconciliation. Im totally confused now what should i do? Should i wait for my friend knowing that chances are very slim that her family would leave her. Or should i patch up with my exwife for the sake of my daughter. I dont feel any emotional connection with my exwife now as she was never nice to me. But my parents are telling me to go for patch up. They are nkt aware about my school friend and i doubt they would approve her due to religious beliefs. Pls guide me I'm totally confused. Thanks A confused Homo Sapiens

Ans: Dear Pratik,
At this point in time, choose neither. You need space to clear your head first.
Too many emotional situations to jump into one more...Give yourself time to figure out what is that you want out of life?
Do you want to get into another commitment in a short gap? It could be an attraction on a rebound as well; so take time to figure these things out well before you decide to patch up or wait for your friend.
You deserve this time off, to make sure that you not only heal from the marriage but also put things in perspective.
So no need to bring on a new confusion for the time being till you get strong enough in the mind to decide the next course of your life. Making a choice right now means you will be bringing in more confusions of either of the two women into your life as well. So, PAUSE and take this time...

Best wishes!

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 13, 2022

Listen
Relationship
Hi I have been married to my college mate for more than 11 years now with a girl child of 8+ years.Wife and I were good friend for 2 years followed by live in for 4 years before we got married. We got into marriage unprepared financially and mentally.My wife is a great responsible caring person -- way more mature than I am. I am a bit childish and emotional, very talkative and expressive person.When I travelled to another city after 5 years of marriage for higher studies, I got involved with another girl. We were very much alike in terms of personalities. We could talk endlessly and were very compatible in all sense. We even got physical and felt like we’d never had this experience before. The thing is she too was recently married to another person quite like my wife.We tried to get separated from our previous relationships but the girl’s family couldn't bear the family pressure and her husband though good otherwise took this on his ego.I waited for 3 years for her to come out.In the mean time I was almost on the verge of breaking my marriage because whatever connection I had with my wife had almost come down to negligible.That girl too had to be in that forcible relationship with no connection at all and had to adopt a child to survive the dead relationship.I got into a messy situation too -- a marriage with no connection but a lovely child.I have a connection with that girl but without living together.I don’t know if I can start a new life and if I do, how much I will be involved with it. Absolutely messed up emotionally and physically. Although my wife and I are financially stable as both of us are officers.That girl too is a medical practitioner but I have no idea if she will ever be able to come out. Plz tell me what to do.I prayed a lot, read lots of books, tried meditation, counselling, still I am in the middle of nowhere.
Ans:

Dear HK,

Why exactly did you feel the need to get into a relationship with another person?

Did your current relationship lack anything that the other relationship was fulfilling you with?

How exactly did the relationship with your wife deteriorate? Did the two of you make efforts to communicate enough in that long distance relationship?

How do you say your marriage is one without connection? How did you lose that connection?

Now, do you plan on continuing in your marriage or move on? If you have decided to move on, isn’t it time for you to come out to your wife and share what has happened?

These questions are possibly ones that are very difficult to face and answer as they bring out the truth; but they will help you get a better grasp of the situation.

It’s nice to live an alternate reality life for some time and relish the goodness but coming back to your real life that holds the ‘real you’ and your responsibilities isn’t something that can be ignored any longer. So, as much as you feel that you are in the middle of nowhere, I see no mention of what your wife must be feeling right at this very moment.

It would help to put things in perspective and talk this out as adults, (and yes, you do owe her that) so that both of you can come to an amicable decision to live more peacefully.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 18, 2023

Listen
Relationship
Hi Anu , This Raaj here this side, I have seen your views on the relationship here on this site . so for that I need your help and your valuable expertise . About myself I am 42 yrs self employed businessman ,I got married in march 2010, it was a arrange marriage . from the day 1 there is a problem and it increases day after day. From the that wedlock I had baby girl . from 2012 situation got worsened matrimonial cases started it continued for next 4-5 yrs . after long battle I got divorced in 2016-17. This divorce cost me a lot , bcoz of that I lost my friends , social stigma, financial lost ( hefty alimony)and lot other problem which are associated with this . Now the main problem comes here , as after my divorce I was not ready to get re marry again but my parents are pressuring mr to get settle again ASAP. After long persuation I said ok …. I started searching my own and parents also started there own . In last 4 yrs I have seen lot of prospects ……..( kissi ko main nahi pasand , kissi ko mera kamm nahi pasand , kissi ko mere parents ke sath rehna nahi pasand …….. kissio ko meri income se problem hai,……………toa kuch mujhe nahi jachi.)there is lot of pressure on me that I should be perfect now after my divorce . after all this I had few good prospects ………….1. she was good but she wasnot happy with my income , she said no to me initially but continued talking and we are still in touch as she moved to Australia in APR 2019.As now we r really very good friends now ,Jab main usme interested tha toa usne na boll diya ………but jab usne dubarra reconsider karke propose kiya toa maine na boll diya. Than in 2020 COVID hits which upsets everybody’s life .360degree . In NOV 2020 I met 1 girl on one of the matrimonial sites ….we shared our details stated talking to each other , she liked me but didn’t responded her positively but continued our talks………in march2021 pata nahi kaise aur kyu …..maine use propose kiya…… maine use milne uske passd gaya ……….we talked …..shared our thoughts ….spend good time ……..but raat ko ghar vapis aa ke maine use NO kar diya . REASON is not known ya kahu toa main darr gaya tha .because of this she also got upst and that makes her depressed. For next 10 days I was so depressed I didn’t had my proper meal ……nothing all. I was in guilt ,that make me depressed for really long . I was only thinking about her only all the time nothing else, On 2nd JULY 21 ko maine pher user message kiya ………. After 2-3 days after my sorry and all that we started talking again. Everything stated good again .now in last week of july 2021 my father got severe heart attack ……and he had a surgery . Now they are pressuring me again that I should get settle soon ……..all my family members and sister and all. Maine Phir usko marriage ke liye tyar kiya aur phir batt ko STOP kar diya . and this tym mujhe gharwalo se aur sab se bahut anbun ho gayi. Ab mujhe samaj aa rahi ki main kya karu . main shaddi to karna chata hoon par kissi pe trust nahi kar pa raha hoon . mere ghar valo ka mujh pe bahut pressure hai . there are some other problem which I would like to disscuss in future . pls help me what should I do , I m feeling helpless . Thanks Raaj
Ans: Dear Raaj,
What is it that you want?
You seem to ready to get into a relationship because your family thinks so, your father had a heart attack and then they pressure you to find a girl to marry.
So, what is it that you want and want to do?
And the possible reason for not striking a chord with the women that you were interacting with. When you have decided what you want, it will show up in your body language, facial gestures and within the conversation. You are possibly still healing from your divorce and are not ready to get into another marriage. So, don't. First, sort your mind out and then think of another relationship.
So kindly, start to think for yourself ignoring what your family tells you. Yes, you need to do that. Family pressure is no reason to get married; of course they mean well and care for you. But, what you want is what matters here.
So, if you want to stop feeling helpless, take charge of your life and do what you think is right for you. Heal from your divorce and think about what you need in another relationship and in your partner. When you ready, then it's time. So, no more helplessness, only strength.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 08, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi.. I am 49 yrs Male & married for 22 yrs with teenage kids.. I live abroad since 16 yrs.. Me & wife had arranged marriage in the same caste when we were in India.. After few months of marriage, my wife told me about her past relationship during collage and only reason she could not continue because of his father resistance( diff caste).. I belong to very middle class with no such precedence like this and felt bad . Later, I continued with her but always had feeling that she would compare the love & affection she got from him, with me.. I am not very romantic or expressive and like to live normal life..! We have little diff of opinion since beginning and will have fight almost every week.. Fast forward when all was going ok with 2 kids, busy work in abroad, I caught her cheating with the same person ( almost 17 yrs after they separated).. They found each other on social media and started talking. .. She being abroad & him in India, will call him daily in my absence for hours and they exchange explicit messages day in and out..! Once caught initially she regretted ( that too only after i got really mad & threaten to tell everyone) and it took us 2-3 yrs to comeback to terms mostly due to younger kids..!! Now 10 yrs later, i found her calling ( although he did not pickup) and now she is telling that she has emotional connection with him from the past while I could not build that connection with her.. She is not committing that this will not happen in future & requesting me to continue as friend, so we can get our younger one to collage and then see if it is worth or separate out. She is even ready to find me someone that fits my choice. I am in dilemma on what to do as i am not ready to forgive her but worried about kids future..! Even though we stay aboard, we have very close network of friends & family which we cant ignore..! I somehow feel to let it go but i get irritated that this is not the life i would like to live now & future. Can you pls advise some tips to move forward
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
At times, relationships run dry and reach a breaking point...you will know if yours, is at that point because if it is and your wife is more interested in finding someone for you rather than addressing the turmoil in your marriage, isn't it evidence enough for you?

Have a clear chat/conversation and find out if she still feels anything for you or whether all love is lost...If she is still interested in pursuing the other person without as much as thinking of how this is going to impact the marriage and family, I guess there is little that you can do. Then you may have to wait as suggested by her till your younger one goes to college. As for friends and family, they will initially talk and blame you or her; slowly that will stop. Your Life, Your Choice...You know what's best...
So, appeal to her and if that is not what she wants, respect her decision. It's difficult BUT imagine living under the same roof and finding your wife emotionally connecting with someone else...Preserve your sane mind...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 16, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi , I am a professor mech engineer , after death of my wife and due to having 5 year girl baby I planned for 2 nd marriage as I live alone away from home town because my of job with my little baby . I accepted a widow having 2 child ,she was working in a govt job 250 km away , after ensuring and agreeing her possibility of transfer and job vacancy @govt office near my house and ensuring she agreed that she will come to live with me along with her 2 kids and my little baby as her trasfer was due in comming few months . We lived apart during her job at 250 km away.,while meeting on weekly offs 6 /7 time in 6 months , then she take 360 degree u turn and said she will not get job transfer to my place and get her trasfer in other dept. in same previous office. And started telling many reasons like she will loose her children's inheritance in her in-laws property ,she will loose promotion , kids Don't want trasfer , and said we will live apart forever . This was contradictory to earlier agreed things .and my my purpose to live in family with my baby not fulfilled , so after long ruckus ,I mutually got divorce from her , Then After divorce I decided to marry non working women having no child and don't expect child as I am @48 year old and tired of living alone and managing job ,girl , house chores . I married to a divorcee girl from Pune ,she was BA first year college drop out girl of 44 yr age after 6 months of long dating on week ends . During 6 months I tried to know her indepth but was don't used to talk much as I was trying to know her true nature, we visited many places ,movies . She seemed perfect as per my requirement of girl wanting no child , and she is house wife . after marriage she behave well for 1 st week ,then she started trouble to hate my baby ( became kaikai )on pety things , she want my baby to house chores at the cost of her important year of 10th std study . She don't liked me taking tution of girl , she didn't like if I help my girl any way . She don't like if I spent some money on my girl . She used to fight all night and don't let me sleep . Now she stated demanding that she want baby , though I was against and b4 marriage agreed to not have any more child due to old age ,cost ,and no personal time for self , then I agreed to have child but b4 that I got her and my fertility tested ,she had weak eggs and syst on her reproductive organs and doc warned to not go for pregnancy due to risk and probability of unhealthy baby birth , but she kept repeating That she want child we consulted 4 Drs. She used to fight and go to her mother's home for 2/4 months after living with me for 2/3 days only . Now she wants divorce , and asks me to keep my girl in hostel if I want her in my life . This Ramayan has left me baffled , What should I do ??? .....
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
The reason to marry for you mainly has been companionship, a mother for your daughter...
And marriage is not a transaction BUT a meeting of minds...when there is no compatibility, there is no space for agreeing on the same things or wanting to make things work which is possibly what has happened with your 2nd and 3rd marriage.
If you want this marriage to work, there has to be an equal commitment by both of you, so, start by emotionally bonding first. Slowly build on this by making goals for the marriage and the future...your only goal can't be mother for your child...not all women are going to readily accept this and some may even falter along the way. Allow the lady and your daughter to bond together for sometime so they develop a unique relationship...
Understand that transactional relationships do not last; so, invest enough time in building trust in that companionship for it to become something meaningful

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |3921 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 25, 2024Hindi
Career
My daughter is in 10 th class Maharashtra board She wants to do carrier in mathematics or economics what are the ways for further education
Ans: Your daughter is interested in pursuing a career in Mathematics or Economics, which offer exciting opportunities and a variety of educational pathways. She can choose from the Science Stream (Mathematics Focus) or the Commerce Stream (Economics Focus), depending on her interests and aptitude.

An option for her is to choose Science with Mathematics in 11th and 12th grade, which will provide a strong foundation in math. After completing 12th Science with Mathematics, she can pursue a Bachelor's Degree in Mathematics, such as B.Sc. in Mathematics, B.Tech or B.E. (Engineering), or a B.Tech in Computer Science, Information Technology, or Electronics.

Postgraduate courses in Mathematics can lead to M.Sc. in Mathematics or Applied Mathematics, or M.Tech in Data Science or Computer Science. Other career paths in Mathematics include Actuarial Science, Data Science/Analytics, and pure mathematics/research.

In Economics, she can pursue Commerce with Economics in 11th and 12th grade, followed by a Bachelor's Degree in Economics, a Master of Arts in Economics, or a Master of Science in Economics. Specialized courses in Economics include Econometrics, Public Policy, Finance, and International Organizations/NGOs.

Joint careers in Mathematics and Economics can be pursued through integrated programs like B.A./B.Sc. in Mathematics and Economics, or Actuarial Science/Financial Mathematics. Entrance exams and competitive exams may be required for each path.

Pursuing Mathematics through the Science stream is an excellent path for your daughter, while Economics through the Commerce stream is ideal for those interested in understanding economies and global trends. All the BEST for Your Daughter's Prosperous Future.

To know more on ‘ Careers | Education | Jobs’, ask / follow Us here in RediffGURUS.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7122 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 22, 2024Hindi
Money
I am 32 years of age I have a corpus of 40 lakhs including mutual funds,stocks,pf,insurance.I invest 65000 in sip every month with 84% in equity, 6% in hybrid and 10% in debt funds as of now with 58% in large cap,27% in mid cap and 15 % in small cap with an xirr of 17.2%. how much will my corpus grow in next 20-30 years ?
Ans: Your financial journey so far is impressive. At 32 years, a corpus of Rs. 40 lakhs reflects good planning. Your SIP of Rs. 65,000 per month and asset allocation indicate strong discipline and understanding of investments.

Your current XIRR of 17.2% is exceptional, suggesting an effective fund selection. Maintaining this momentum will help you build substantial wealth.

Growth Potential Over the Next 20-30 Years
Power of Compounding

Compounding over 20-30 years can multiply wealth significantly.
Your disciplined SIP approach amplifies this effect.
Corpus Growth Projections

If your XIRR sustains near 17%, your corpus can grow exponentially.
Over 20 years, it may cross Rs. 10-12 crores.
In 30 years, this could grow beyond Rs. 30-40 crores.
Consideration for Realistic Returns

Sustaining 17% XIRR may be optimistic in the long term.
A realistic expectation of 12-15% still ensures significant growth.
Factors Influencing Your Future Corpus
Market Volatility

Equity-heavy portfolios are prone to short-term fluctuations.
Maintain your long-term perspective to overcome these.
Asset Allocation Discipline

Your 84% equity allocation is ideal for long-term goals.
Rebalance annually to maintain this allocation.
Economic Growth and Inflation

India's economic growth supports equity performance.
High inflation demands better returns to preserve purchasing power.
SIP Increments

Increasing SIP annually can enhance corpus growth.
A 10% increment every year could add several crores.
Importance of Diversification
Large, Mid, and Small-Cap Allocation

Your 58% large-cap, 27% mid-cap, and 15% small-cap allocation is balanced.
This mix ensures stability and growth potential.
Hybrid and Debt Funds Role

Your 10% debt allocation cushions against market volatility.
Hybrid funds offer consistent returns with lower risk.
Tax Efficiency in Long-Term Investments
Equity Fund Taxation

Long-term capital gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.
Factor this in when planning withdrawals.
Debt Fund Taxation

Gains are taxed as per your income slab.
Plan asset allocation changes with tax efficiency in mind.
Enhancing Your Strategy
Emergency Fund

Maintain 6-12 months of expenses in liquid or ultra-short-term funds.
Insurance Review

Ensure adequate term insurance and health insurance coverage.
Goal-Based Investing

Align specific investments to defined goals like retirement or children's education.
Periodic Review

Review fund performance and portfolio allocation annually.
Replace underperforming funds if needed.
Final Insights
Your current portfolio and discipline promise exceptional long-term results. Continue SIPs, periodically increase investments, and review portfolio performance. A realistic approach with a focus on equity can help you achieve remarkable financial milestones over 20-30 years.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7122 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Money
Hi my name is Mani and aged 36 i am drawing a monthly salary of 3.5lakhs. Below are my investments. I want to achieve around 10Cr by 50. Current MF potfolio:50L Shares/ETF: 10L PF: 39L US ESOP: 1.2 Crore Monthly SIP: 1.65Lkhs 2 houses: 95L & 60L I can invest upto 2.5-3lakhs montly. Closed all my loans.
Ans: Your current investments reflect excellent financial discipline and planning. With your income and ability to invest Rs 2.5-3 lakhs monthly, you are in a strong position to achieve your target of Rs 10 crore by 50. However, optimising your portfolio is crucial for achieving this milestone efficiently. Here's an in-depth assessment and strategy to guide you.

Assessment of Current Investments
Mutual Fund Portfolio: Rs 50 Lakh
This portfolio forms a significant part of your wealth.
Equity mutual funds can offer long-term growth.
Regular reviews and diversification will enhance returns.
Shares and ETFs: Rs 10 Lakh
Direct equity and ETFs require active monitoring.
ETFs have limitations, like tracking errors and passive management.
Disadvantages of ETFs:

Lack of flexibility to outperform benchmarks.
Returns are limited to market indices, missing active management benefits.
Provident Fund: Rs 39 Lakh
PF is a safe, tax-efficient retirement tool.
Growth is limited compared to equity investments.
US ESOP: Rs 1.2 Crore
ESOPs provide substantial value, but currency and company risks exist.
Diversification is essential to reduce concentrated risk.
Monthly SIPs: Rs 1.65 Lakh
A high monthly SIP reflects your commitment to wealth creation.
Fund selection and risk balance will determine growth.
Real Estate: Rs 95 Lakh and Rs 60 Lakh
While real estate offers stability, liquidity issues can be a challenge.
Rental income should align with market returns to remain beneficial.
Strategy to Achieve Rs 10 Crore by 50
1. Optimise Mutual Fund Investments
Increase allocation to actively managed equity funds.
Diversify into large-cap, mid-cap, and hybrid funds for balanced growth.
Review the portfolio with a Certified Financial Planner every year.
2. Enhance Monthly SIP Contributions
Increase SIPs to Rs 2.5-3 lakh, matching your investment capacity.
Prioritise equity mutual funds for better compounding over 14 years.
Allocate a small portion to debt funds for stability.
3. Reevaluate Direct Equity and ETFs
Limit ETFs due to their passive nature and tracking errors.
Focus on direct equity only if you have time for active monitoring.
Otherwise, shift to professionally managed equity funds.
4. Diversify US ESOP Holdings
Reduce dependency on your company’s ESOPs.
Gradually liquidate and reinvest in Indian equity and international mutual funds.
Diversification will safeguard against market volatility and currency risks.
5. Leverage Provident Fund Efficiently
PF will act as a stable component of your retirement corpus.
Do not withdraw unless essential.
6. Address Real Estate Investments
Analyse the rental yield and growth potential of your properties.
If returns are below expectations, consider selling one property.
Reinvest proceeds in mutual funds for higher returns and liquidity.
Tax Efficiency and New Rules
Equity Mutual Funds
Long-term capital gains (LTCG) above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.
Short-term capital gains (STCG) are taxed at 20%.
Plan withdrawals strategically to reduce tax liability.
Debt Funds
Gains are taxed as per your income slab.
Use systematic withdrawal plans for efficient taxation.
ESOPs and Real Estate
ESOPs will attract capital gains tax upon sale.
Real estate gains are taxed under capital gains rules.
Invest gains from property sales into mutual funds to save on taxes.
Additional Recommendations
1. Adequate Life and Health Insurance
Ensure you have term insurance covering at least 10 times your annual income.
Maintain comprehensive health insurance for your family.
2. Emergency Fund
Keep six months’ expenses in a liquid fund or savings account.
This ensures liquidity during unforeseen circumstances.
3. Monitor and Rebalance Portfolio
Regularly review asset allocation with a Certified Financial Planner.
Adjust based on market conditions and financial milestones.
Final Insights
You are on the right track with your disciplined investing approach. To ensure you reach Rs 10 crore by 50, optimise your investments, enhance tax efficiency, and diversify risks. Focus on actively managed funds, reduce dependence on real estate, and leverage your high savings potential. Regular monitoring and strategic decisions will make your goal achievable.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7122 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 22, 2024Hindi
Money
Hello Ramalingam Ji, I am 44 years old, working in IT and live in Bengaluru. I am unmarried at this moment. I live in a rented house. Here are my investments breakups - 1.45 Cr in Equity Shares, 5 Lakhs in MF, 27 Lakhs in PPF, 20 Lakhs in EPF, 7 Lakhs in NPS, and 14 Lakhs in FD as an Emergency Fund. I have a health insurance of 30L apart from the office provided one. My monthly in hand salary about 2.2 Lakhs. And my monthly expenses including rent, insurances, sports/gym subscription, food and others comes about 75 - 80 Thousands a month. I invest 1.1 Lakhs in equity shares, 18 Thousands in RDs to meet my certain onetime expenditures in a years such as insurances, internet payments etc. I do not have any loans. How do you think I should go about so I could purchase a house/flat as well as have enough investments using which I could live comfortably. I also want to know if at all possible to retire by 50 or 55 years? will it even makes sense purchasing a house/flat since I have no one after me. Thanking you in advanced.
Ans: You are in a strong financial position. You have diverse investments and stable income. Your disciplined approach reflects a clear financial vision.

This response provides detailed insights into buying a house, early retirement, and optimising your investments.

Understanding Your Current Financial Health
1. Investments and Emergency Funds

Rs 1.45 crore in equity is a significant achievement.

Your Rs 14 lakh emergency fund is well-planned. It ensures liquidity during emergencies.

 

2. Monthly Income and Expenses

You save and invest a substantial portion of your Rs 2.2 lakh monthly salary.

Expenses are well-balanced, leaving you with Rs 1.1 lakh for investments.

 

3. Health Insurance Coverage

You have Rs 30 lakh health insurance, which safeguards against medical emergencies.

Office-provided insurance adds additional security.

House Purchase Consideration
1. Evaluate the Need for a House

A house is not necessary unless it enhances your quality of life.

With no dependents, consider renting for flexibility.

 

2. Financial Implications of Buying a House

Buying a house requires a long-term financial commitment.

EMIs will reduce your ability to save and invest aggressively.

 

3. Alternative Options

Continue renting if the cost is reasonable and suits your lifestyle.

Investing the funds earmarked for a house can yield better returns over time.

Early Retirement by 50 or 55
1. Analyse Monthly Expenses Post-Retirement

Estimate future monthly expenses, considering inflation.

Rs 75,000 today could become Rs 1.5 lakh in 15 years.

 

2. Calculate the Required Corpus

To withdraw Rs 1.5 lakh monthly, you need Rs 4.5 crore.

This corpus ensures financial independence throughout retirement.

 

3. Utilise Current Investments for Growth

Your investments in equity, MF, PPF, EPF, and NPS must compound consistently.

Diversify your portfolio to balance growth and stability.

Investment Optimisation
1. Focus on Equity Mutual Funds

Increase your MF investments for long-term growth.

Actively managed funds offer higher returns compared to index funds.

 

2. Avoid Direct Mutual Funds

Direct funds lack professional guidance and may lead to errors.

Regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner ensure optimised returns.

 

3. Maximise NPS Contributions

NPS provides additional tax benefits under Section 80CCD(1B).

It supports your retirement corpus with equity exposure and lower risk.

 

4. Reassess Fixed Deposits

Rs 14 lakh in FDs offers safety but lower returns.

Shift a portion to debt funds or balanced funds for better inflation protection.

Emergency Fund and Risk Management
1. Maintain Adequate Liquidity

Keep six months' expenses in liquid investments like FDs or short-term funds.

This ensures quick access to funds during emergencies.

 

2. Evaluate Insurance Adequacy

Your current health cover of Rs 30 lakh is sufficient.

Ensure critical illness or personal accident cover if not already included.

Retirement Income Planning
1. Generate Passive Income

Explore dividend-paying funds for steady income during retirement.

Consider systematic withdrawal plans (SWPs) post-retirement for tax efficiency.

 

2. Ladder Your Investments

Align investments to meet milestones like early retirement and healthcare needs.

Staggered withdrawals reduce risks during market downturns.

Tax Planning
1. Optimise Tax Benefits

Maximise contributions to tax-saving instruments like PPF and NPS.

Consider tax-efficient mutual fund categories to reduce liability.

 

2. Understand Capital Gains Taxation

Equity mutual funds' LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.

Short-term gains attract 20% tax, so plan redemptions wisely.

Final Insights
Early retirement and comfortable living are achievable for you. Focus on growing your corpus with equity and balanced investments. Renting a house is practical if buying doesn't align with your goals. Work with a Certified Financial Planner to optimise your investments and ensure a secure financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7122 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Listen
Money
Hello Sir, I want to invest 5k per month in mutuals fund. Am targeting 15acs in next 16years. Can you pls suggest me good fund?
Ans: Investing Rs. 5,000 per month for 16 years to achieve Rs. 15 lakhs is a commendable goal. A systematic investment plan (SIP) in mutual funds can help achieve this. Your focus should be on selecting funds that align with your risk appetite and long-term horizon.

Understanding Your Target
Your target is Rs. 15 lakhs in 16 years.
This requires consistent returns from equity mutual funds.
Equity funds are ideal for long-term goals due to their growth potential.
Investment Strategy
Focus on Equity-Dominated Funds

Equity funds have the potential for higher long-term growth.
Diversify across large-cap, flexi-cap, and mid-cap funds.
Actively Managed Funds Preferred

Actively managed funds outperform index funds over long durations.
A good fund manager can provide better returns than passive funds.
Avoid Direct Funds

Investing through a Certified Financial Planner ensures professional advice.
Regular funds with guidance offer better portfolio tracking and rebalancing.
Monitor and Review Regularly

Review your investments yearly to stay aligned with your goal.
Make changes based on performance and market conditions.
Suggested Fund Categories
Large-Cap Funds

These funds provide stability and moderate growth.
They invest in well-established companies with strong performance records.
Flexi-Cap Funds

These funds invest across large, mid, and small-cap companies.
They offer flexibility and diversification.
Mid-Cap Funds

Mid-cap funds offer higher growth potential but come with moderate risk.
Suitable for long-term wealth creation.
Hybrid Funds

These funds balance equity and debt exposure.
They provide moderate risk with consistent returns.
Tax Considerations
Equity Fund Taxation

Long-term capital gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.
Short-term capital gains are taxed at 20%.
Tax-Efficient Withdrawals

Plan withdrawals strategically to minimise tax liability.
Hold funds for the long term to benefit from favourable tax rates.
Other Recommendations
Build an Emergency Fund

Set aside at least six months’ expenses in a liquid fund.
This provides financial security during emergencies.
Stay Invested for the Entire Duration

Equity investments need time to grow and overcome volatility.
Avoid premature withdrawals to maximise returns.
Disciplined Investing

Continue SIPs without interruption to achieve your goal.
Market fluctuations should not deter your commitment.
Final Insights
With disciplined investing and the right fund selection, achieving Rs. 15 lakhs in 16 years is possible. Focus on equity funds for long-term growth and consult a Certified Financial Planner for professional guidance.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x