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Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 03, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Pratik Question by Pratik on Mar 02, 2023Hindi
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I'M 40 years old man, i have had troubled childhood. I faced abuse from my elder brother who later on developed mental health issues whiich broughg lot of stress to the family. I worked very hard to achieve reasonable professional success but my personal life has been very difficult. I got married with lot of difficulty despite being well placed professionally and decent looks. It was an arranged marriage but things went bad after a year. I caught my wife having an affair with her ex but i fogave her for the sake of myndaugher who was just 1 year old then. She keept on having flings with gym instructor and later on her colleagues which i dont have any proof of. She would humilate me in front of my maid driver and other people. But i wanted ti save my marriage for the sake of my daughter who was only 4-5 years old then. Finally she started asking me for divorce after every trivial fights. Fed up i finally agreed and we separated in 2021 November. During that time i came in contact with my school friend. She proposed to me during our school days but due to stress at home and other issues i said no but i always liked her. When we started talking around December 2021 and we realized we still love each other after 20 years. But problem was though i was divorced she was still married and she is from a different religion. She is trying hard to get separated from her husband but her family being very conservative is not allowing her to do so. I'm stuck with her emotionally. Now my ex-wife has started approaching me for reconciliation. Im totally confused now what should i do? Should i wait for my friend knowing that chances are very slim that her family would leave her. Or should i patch up with my exwife for the sake of my daughter. I dont feel any emotional connection with my exwife now as she was never nice to me. But my parents are telling me to go for patch up. They are nkt aware about my school friend and i doubt they would approve her due to religious beliefs. Pls guide me I'm totally confused. Thanks A confused Homo Sapiens

Ans: Dear Pratik,
At this point in time, choose neither. You need space to clear your head first.
Too many emotional situations to jump into one more...Give yourself time to figure out what is that you want out of life?
Do you want to get into another commitment in a short gap? It could be an attraction on a rebound as well; so take time to figure these things out well before you decide to patch up or wait for your friend.
You deserve this time off, to make sure that you not only heal from the marriage but also put things in perspective.
So no need to bring on a new confusion for the time being till you get strong enough in the mind to decide the next course of your life. Making a choice right now means you will be bringing in more confusions of either of the two women into your life as well. So, PAUSE and take this time...

Best wishes!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 13, 2022

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Relationship
Hi I have been married to my college mate for more than 11 years now with a girl child of 8+ years.Wife and I were good friend for 2 years followed by live in for 4 years before we got married. We got into marriage unprepared financially and mentally.My wife is a great responsible caring person -- way more mature than I am. I am a bit childish and emotional, very talkative and expressive person.When I travelled to another city after 5 years of marriage for higher studies, I got involved with another girl. We were very much alike in terms of personalities. We could talk endlessly and were very compatible in all sense. We even got physical and felt like we’d never had this experience before. The thing is she too was recently married to another person quite like my wife.We tried to get separated from our previous relationships but the girl’s family couldn't bear the family pressure and her husband though good otherwise took this on his ego.I waited for 3 years for her to come out.In the mean time I was almost on the verge of breaking my marriage because whatever connection I had with my wife had almost come down to negligible.That girl too had to be in that forcible relationship with no connection at all and had to adopt a child to survive the dead relationship.I got into a messy situation too -- a marriage with no connection but a lovely child.I have a connection with that girl but without living together.I don’t know if I can start a new life and if I do, how much I will be involved with it. Absolutely messed up emotionally and physically. Although my wife and I are financially stable as both of us are officers.That girl too is a medical practitioner but I have no idea if she will ever be able to come out. Plz tell me what to do.I prayed a lot, read lots of books, tried meditation, counselling, still I am in the middle of nowhere.
Ans:

Dear HK,

Why exactly did you feel the need to get into a relationship with another person?

Did your current relationship lack anything that the other relationship was fulfilling you with?

How exactly did the relationship with your wife deteriorate? Did the two of you make efforts to communicate enough in that long distance relationship?

How do you say your marriage is one without connection? How did you lose that connection?

Now, do you plan on continuing in your marriage or move on? If you have decided to move on, isn’t it time for you to come out to your wife and share what has happened?

These questions are possibly ones that are very difficult to face and answer as they bring out the truth; but they will help you get a better grasp of the situation.

It’s nice to live an alternate reality life for some time and relish the goodness but coming back to your real life that holds the ‘real you’ and your responsibilities isn’t something that can be ignored any longer. So, as much as you feel that you are in the middle of nowhere, I see no mention of what your wife must be feeling right at this very moment.

It would help to put things in perspective and talk this out as adults, (and yes, you do owe her that) so that both of you can come to an amicable decision to live more peacefully.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 18, 2023

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Relationship
Hi Anu , This Raaj here this side, I have seen your views on the relationship here on this site . so for that I need your help and your valuable expertise . About myself I am 42 yrs self employed businessman ,I got married in march 2010, it was a arrange marriage . from the day 1 there is a problem and it increases day after day. From the that wedlock I had baby girl . from 2012 situation got worsened matrimonial cases started it continued for next 4-5 yrs . after long battle I got divorced in 2016-17. This divorce cost me a lot , bcoz of that I lost my friends , social stigma, financial lost ( hefty alimony)and lot other problem which are associated with this . Now the main problem comes here , as after my divorce I was not ready to get re marry again but my parents are pressuring mr to get settle again ASAP. After long persuation I said ok …. I started searching my own and parents also started there own . In last 4 yrs I have seen lot of prospects ……..( kissi ko main nahi pasand , kissi ko mera kamm nahi pasand , kissi ko mere parents ke sath rehna nahi pasand …….. kissio ko meri income se problem hai,……………toa kuch mujhe nahi jachi.)there is lot of pressure on me that I should be perfect now after my divorce . after all this I had few good prospects ………….1. she was good but she wasnot happy with my income , she said no to me initially but continued talking and we are still in touch as she moved to Australia in APR 2019.As now we r really very good friends now ,Jab main usme interested tha toa usne na boll diya ………but jab usne dubarra reconsider karke propose kiya toa maine na boll diya. Than in 2020 COVID hits which upsets everybody’s life .360degree . In NOV 2020 I met 1 girl on one of the matrimonial sites ….we shared our details stated talking to each other , she liked me but didn’t responded her positively but continued our talks………in march2021 pata nahi kaise aur kyu …..maine use propose kiya…… maine use milne uske passd gaya ……….we talked …..shared our thoughts ….spend good time ……..but raat ko ghar vapis aa ke maine use NO kar diya . REASON is not known ya kahu toa main darr gaya tha .because of this she also got upst and that makes her depressed. For next 10 days I was so depressed I didn’t had my proper meal ……nothing all. I was in guilt ,that make me depressed for really long . I was only thinking about her only all the time nothing else, On 2nd JULY 21 ko maine pher user message kiya ………. After 2-3 days after my sorry and all that we started talking again. Everything stated good again .now in last week of july 2021 my father got severe heart attack ……and he had a surgery . Now they are pressuring me again that I should get settle soon ……..all my family members and sister and all. Maine Phir usko marriage ke liye tyar kiya aur phir batt ko STOP kar diya . and this tym mujhe gharwalo se aur sab se bahut anbun ho gayi. Ab mujhe samaj aa rahi ki main kya karu . main shaddi to karna chata hoon par kissi pe trust nahi kar pa raha hoon . mere ghar valo ka mujh pe bahut pressure hai . there are some other problem which I would like to disscuss in future . pls help me what should I do , I m feeling helpless . Thanks Raaj
Ans: Dear Raaj,
What is it that you want?
You seem to ready to get into a relationship because your family thinks so, your father had a heart attack and then they pressure you to find a girl to marry.
So, what is it that you want and want to do?
And the possible reason for not striking a chord with the women that you were interacting with. When you have decided what you want, it will show up in your body language, facial gestures and within the conversation. You are possibly still healing from your divorce and are not ready to get into another marriage. So, don't. First, sort your mind out and then think of another relationship.
So kindly, start to think for yourself ignoring what your family tells you. Yes, you need to do that. Family pressure is no reason to get married; of course they mean well and care for you. But, what you want is what matters here.
So, if you want to stop feeling helpless, take charge of your life and do what you think is right for you. Heal from your divorce and think about what you need in another relationship and in your partner. When you ready, then it's time. So, no more helplessness, only strength.

All the best!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 23, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Anu! I am 46 yrs old. I am married and have two daughters. I fell in love with a woman of 3-4 yrs younger to me, around 8 yrs ago. She was not happy with her marriage and she took divorce as I helped her to come over her trauma. It was very fine relationship between both of us. Now she is asking me to give divorce to my wife and to get marry with her. I really love my wife and her also, b'coz she also loves me so much and so do I. What to do now as my wife doesn't want to accept her and neither she wants to accept my wife.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
No man would want to be where you are; seriously!
Now, how you got yourself in this mess is anybody's guess...but for the sake of your family (things are going well for you), make a decision that works best for everyone; at least in the long term. (It is ethically not right for me to make a decision for you).

It maybe unfair to either of the women and you are going to have to bear the consequences...
Now, I am not judging you or what you have done but you obviously knew all along that being in love with the other lady was a choice...also, now the expectation that she has from you is something that is uncomfortable to you.
Did she ever get this message from you that if she divorced her husband, that you will also divorce your wife and join her?
More than love, this has become neediness with demands...

Bottom line: Make a decision, stick by it and also help either of them tide over this! You owe them both that!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 07, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi.. I am 49 yrs Male & married for 22 yrs with teenage kids.. I live abroad since 16 yrs.. Me & wife had arranged marriage in the same caste when we were in India.. After few months of marriage, my wife told me about her past relationship during collage and only reason she could not continue because of his father resistance( diff caste).. I belong to very middle class with no such precedence like this and felt bad . Later, I continued with her but always had feeling that she would compare the love & affection she got from him, with me.. I am not very romantic or expressive and like to live normal life..! We have little diff of opinion since beginning and will have fight almost every week.. Fast forward when all was going ok with 2 kids, busy work in abroad, I caught her cheating with the same person ( almost 17 yrs after they separated).. They found each other on social media and started talking. .. She being abroad & him in India, will call him daily in my absence for hours and they exchange explicit messages day in and out..! Once caught initially she regretted ( that too only after i got really mad & threaten to tell everyone) and it took us 2-3 yrs to comeback to terms mostly due to younger kids..!! Now 10 yrs later, i found her calling ( although he did not pickup) and now she is telling that she has emotional connection with him from the past while I could not build that connection with her.. She is not commit for anything and requesting me to continue as friend so we can get our younger one to collage and then see or separate. She is even ready to find me someone that fits my choice. I am in dilemma on what to do as i am not ready to forgive her but worried about kids future..! Even though we stay aboard, we have very close network of friends & family which we cant ignore..! I somehow feel to let it go but i get irritated that this is not the life i would like to live now & future. Can you pls advise some tips to move forward
Ans: it’s important to acknowledge that your feelings are valid. You’ve been patient and committed, but her actions have undermined the trust in your marriage. It’s not just about the past relationship; it’s about how her choices have affected your life and your sense of security in the relationship.

One option is to seek couples therapy. Even if your wife seems unsure about the future, a neutral third party can help facilitate conversations that might clarify what each of you really wants and needs. Therapy could also help in finding a way to co-parent effectively if you decide to separate.

If staying together for the kids is a priority, it’s crucial to establish clear boundaries and expectations moving forward. You need to decide what’s non-negotiable for you in terms of respect and honesty. If she’s truly committed to staying in the marriage until your kids are older, she needs to show that by cutting off contact with this other person and working on rebuilding your relationship.

However, if you feel that you can’t move past this betrayal or that staying will only lead to more resentment and unhappiness, it might be worth considering a separation. Kids are resilient, and it’s often better for them to see their parents happy apart rather than miserable together.

Ultimately, this decision is about what kind of life you want to live moving forward. You deserve a relationship where you feel valued, respected, and loved. Take your time to consider what will bring you the most peace and happiness in the long run, and don’t be afraid to prioritize your own well-being.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 08, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi.. I am 49 yrs Male & married for 22 yrs with teenage kids.. I live abroad since 16 yrs.. Me & wife had arranged marriage in the same caste when we were in India.. After few months of marriage, my wife told me about her past relationship during collage and only reason she could not continue because of his father resistance( diff caste).. I belong to very middle class with no such precedence like this and felt bad . Later, I continued with her but always had feeling that she would compare the love & affection she got from him, with me.. I am not very romantic or expressive and like to live normal life..! We have little diff of opinion since beginning and will have fight almost every week.. Fast forward when all was going ok with 2 kids, busy work in abroad, I caught her cheating with the same person ( almost 17 yrs after they separated).. They found each other on social media and started talking. .. She being abroad & him in India, will call him daily in my absence for hours and they exchange explicit messages day in and out..! Once caught initially she regretted ( that too only after i got really mad & threaten to tell everyone) and it took us 2-3 yrs to comeback to terms mostly due to younger kids..!! Now 10 yrs later, i found her calling ( although he did not pickup) and now she is telling that she has emotional connection with him from the past while I could not build that connection with her.. She is not committing that this will not happen in future & requesting me to continue as friend, so we can get our younger one to collage and then see if it is worth or separate out. She is even ready to find me someone that fits my choice. I am in dilemma on what to do as i am not ready to forgive her but worried about kids future..! Even though we stay aboard, we have very close network of friends & family which we cant ignore..! I somehow feel to let it go but i get irritated that this is not the life i would like to live now & future. Can you pls advise some tips to move forward
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
At times, relationships run dry and reach a breaking point...you will know if yours, is at that point because if it is and your wife is more interested in finding someone for you rather than addressing the turmoil in your marriage, isn't it evidence enough for you?

Have a clear chat/conversation and find out if she still feels anything for you or whether all love is lost...If she is still interested in pursuing the other person without as much as thinking of how this is going to impact the marriage and family, I guess there is little that you can do. Then you may have to wait as suggested by her till your younger one goes to college. As for friends and family, they will initially talk and blame you or her; slowly that will stop. Your Life, Your Choice...You know what's best...
So, appeal to her and if that is not what she wants, respect her decision. It's difficult BUT imagine living under the same roof and finding your wife emotionally connecting with someone else...Preserve your sane mind...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10852 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Dec 07, 2025

Career
Hello, I’m a student who recently joined the Integrated M.Sc Physics program at Amrita University. I’m aiming for a strong academic foundation and a clear career path. Could you please guide me on the following: How good is this course for research careers or higher studies (IISc, IITs, abroad)? What are the placement prospects after Integrated M.Sc Physics at Amrita? Does the program help in preparing for alternate options like UPSC, CDS/AFCAT, or technical roles? What skills (coding, research projects, certifications) should I start early to make the most of this degree?
Ans: Sree, Program Overview and Academic Foundation: Congratulations on joining the Integrated M.Sc Physics program at Amrita University. This five-year integrated program represents a rigorous pathway designed to equip you with advanced theoretical and experimental physics knowledge combined with cutting-edge scientific computing skills. The curriculum uniquely integrates a minor in Scientific Computing, which adds substantial computational capability to your profile—a critical advantage in today's research and professional landscape. The program incorporates comprehensive coursework spanning classical mechanics, electromagnetism, quantum mechanics, statistical physics, advanced laboratory work, and specialized topics in materials physics, optoelectronics, and computational methods, positioning you excellently for both research and professional careers.
Research Career Prospects: IISc, IITs, and Beyond: For research-oriented careers, the Integrated M.Sc Physics program at Amrita provides an exceptional foundation. Amrita's curriculum specifically aligns with GATE and UGC-NET examination syllabi, and the institution emphasizes early research engagement. The faculty at Amrita actively publish research in Scopus-indexed journals, with over 60 publications in international venues within the past five years, exposing you to active research environments.
To pursue research at premier institutions like IISc, you would typically follow the PhD pathway. IISc accepts M.Sc graduates through their Integrated PhD programs, and with your Amrita M.Sc, you're eligible to apply. You'll need to qualify the relevant entrance examinations, and your integrated program's emphasis on research fundamentals provides strong preparation. The final year of your Integrated M.Sc is intentionally structured to be nearly free of classroom commitments, enabling engagement with research projects at institutes like IISc, IITs, and National Labs. According to Amrita's data, over 80% of M.Sc Physics students secured internship offers from reputed institutions during academic year 2019-20, directly facilitating research career transitions.
Placement and Direct Employment Opportunities: Amrita University boasts a comprehensive placement ecosystem with strong corporate and government sector connections. According to NIRF placement data for the Amrita Integrated M.Sc program (5-year), the median salary in 2023-24 stood at ?7.2 LPA with approximately 57% placement rate. However, these figures reflect general placement trends; physics graduates often secure higher packages in specialized technical roles. Many graduates join software companies like Infosys (with early offers), Google, and PayPal, where their strong analytical and computational skills command competitive compensation packages ranging from ?8-15 LPA for entry-level positions.
The Department of Corporate and Industrial Relations at Amrita provides intensive three-semester life skills training covering linguistic competence, data interpretation, group discussions, and interview techniques. This structured placement support significantly enhances your employability in both government and private sectors.
Government Sector Opportunities: UPSC, BARC, DRDO, and ISRO: Your M.Sc Physics degree opens multiple avenues for prestigious government employment. UPSC Geophysicist examinations explicitly list M.Sc Physics or Applied Physics as qualifying degrees, enabling you to compete for Group A positions in the Geological Survey of India and Central Ground Water Board. The age limit for geophysicist positions is 32 years (with relaxation for reserved categories), and the exam comprises preliminary, main, and interview stages.
BARC (Bhabha Atomic Research Centre) actively recruits M.Sc Physics graduates as Scientific Officers and Research Fellows. Recruitment occurs through the BARC Online Test or GATE scores, with positions in nuclear science, radiation protection, and atomic research. BARC Summer Internship programs are available, offering ?5,000-?10,000 monthly stipends with opportunity for future scientist recruitment.
DRDO (Defense Research and Development Organization) recruits M.Sc Physics graduates through CEPTAM examinations or GATE scores for roles involving defense technology, weapon systems, and laser physics research. ISRO (Indian Space Research Organisation) regularly advertises scientist/engineer positions through competitive recruitment for candidates with strong physics backgrounds, offering opportunities in satellite technology and space science applications.
Other significant employers include the Indian Meteorological Department (IMD) recruiting as scientific officers, and NPCIL (Nuclear Power Corporation of India Limited), offering stable government service with competitive compensation packages exceeding ?8-12 LPA for scientists.
Alternate Career Pathways: UPSC, CDS, and AFCAT: UPSC Civil Services (IFS - Indian Forest Service): M.Sc Physics graduates qualify for UPSC Civil Services examinations, with the forest service offering opportunities for science-based administrative roles with potential to reach senior government positions.
CDS/AFCAT (Armed Forces): While AFCAT meteorology branches specifically require "B.Sc with Maths & Physics with 60% minimum marks," the technical branches (Aeronautical Engineering and Ground Duty Technical roles) require graduation/integrated postgraduation in Engineering/Technology. An M.Sc Physics integrates well with technical qualifications, though you would need engineering background for direct officer entry. However, you remain eligible for specialized technical interviews if applying through alternate defence channels.
UGC-NET Examination: This pathway leads to Assistant Professor positions in central universities and colleges across India. NET-qualified candidates receive scholarships of ?31,000/month for 2-year JRF positions with PhD pursuit, transitioning to Assistant Professor salaries of ?41,000/month in government institutions. This route provides long-term academic career security with research opportunities.
Private Sector Technical Roles
M.Sc Physics graduates are increasingly valued in data science, software engineering, and technical consulting. Companies actively recruit physics graduates for software development, where strong problem-solving and logical reasoning translate to competitive packages of ?10-20 LPA. Specialized domains including quantum computing development, financial modeling, and scientific computing offer premium compensation. Your minor in Scientific Computing makes you particularly attractive to technology companies requiring computational expertise.
International Opportunities and Higher Studies Abroad
An M.Sc from Amrita facilitates admission to PhD programs at international institutions. German universities offer tuition-free or low-fee MSc Physics programs (2 years) with scholarships like DAAD providing €850+ monthly stipends. US universities accept M.Sc graduates directly for PhD positions with full funding (tuition coverage + stipend). These pathways require GRE scores and strong Statement of Purpose articulating research interests. Research collaboration opportunities exist with Max Planck Institute (Germany) and CalTech Summer Research Program (USA), both welcoming Indian M.Sc students.
Essential Skills and Certifications to Develop Immediately: Programming Languages: Start learning Python immediately—it's universally used in research and industry. Dedicate 2-3 hours weekly to data analysis, scientific computing libraries (NumPy, SciPy, Pandas), and machine learning fundamentals. MATLAB is equally critical for physics applications, particularly numerical simulations and data visualization. Aim to complete MATLAB certification courses within your first year.
Research Tools: Learn Git/version control, LaTeX for scientific documentation, and data analysis frameworks. These skills are indispensable for publishing research papers and collaborating on projects.
Certifications Worth Pursuing: (1) MATLAB Certification (DIYguru or MathWorks official courses) (2) Python for Data Science (complete certificate programs from platforms like Coursera) (3) Machine Learning Fundamentals (for expanding technical versatility) & (4) Scientific Communication and Technical Writing (develop through departmental workshops)
Strategic Internship Planning: Leverage Amrita's research connections systematically. In your third year, apply to BARC Summer Internship, IISER Internships, TIFR Summer Fellowships, and IIT Internship programs (like IIT Kanpur SURGE). These expose you to frontier research while establishing connections for future PhD or scientist recruitment. Target 2-3 research internships across different specializations to develop versatility.

TO SUM UP, Your Integrated M.Sc Physics degree from Amrita positions you exceptionally well for competitive research careers at IISc/IITs, prestigious government scientist roles at BARC/DRDO/ISRO, and international PhD opportunities. The program's scientific computing emphasis differentiates you in the job market. Immediate priorities: (1) Master Python and MATLAB within the first two years; (2) Engage in research projects starting year 2-3; (3) Target internships at premiere research institutions; (4) Prepare GATE while completing your degree for maximum flexibility in recruitment; (5) Consider UGC-NET for long-term academic stability. Your career trajectory will ultimately depend on developing strong research fundamentals, demonstrating consistent excellence in specialization areas, and strategically selecting internship and research opportunities. The rigorous Amrita program combined with disciplined skill development positions you for exceptional career success across multiple sectors. Choose the most suitable option for you out of the various options available mentioned above. All the BEST for Your Prosperous Future!

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Asked on - Dec 07, 2025 | Answered on Dec 07, 2025
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Ans: Welcome Sree.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10872 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 06, 2025Hindi
Money
Dear Sir/Ma'am, I need some guidance and advice for continuing my mutual fund investments. I am a 36 year old male, married, no kids yet and no debts/liabilities as such. I have couple of savings in PPF, NPS, Emergency funds and long term investing in direct stocks. I recently started below mentioned SIPs for long term to grow wealth. Request you to review the same and let me know if I should continue with the SIPs or need to rationalize. Kindly also advice on how to invest a lumpsum amount of around 6lacs. invesco small cap 2000 motilal oswal midcap 2700 parag parikh flexicap 3000 HDFC flexicap 3100 ICICI prudential largecap 3100 HDFC large and midcap 3100 HDFC gold etf FOF 2000 ICICI Pru equity and debt fund 3000 HDFC balanced advantage fund 3000 nippon india silver etf FOF 2000
Ans: You already built a solid foundation. Many investors delay planning. But you started early at 36. That gives you a strong advantage. You have no liabilities. You have long term thinking. You also have diversified savings like PPF, NPS, Emergency funds and direct stocks. That shows clarity and discipline. This approach builds wealth with less stress over time.

You also started systematic investments in equity funds. That is a positive step. Your selection covers multiple categories like large cap, mid cap, small cap, flexi cap, hybrid and precious metals. So the intent is right. You are trying to create a broad portfolio. That gives balance.

» Your Portfolio Composition Understanding
Your current SIP list includes:

Small cap

Mid cap

Flexi cap

Large cap

Large and mid cap

Hybrid category

Gold and Silver FoF

Equity and Debt allocation fund

Dynamic hybrid fund

This shows you are trying to cover many segments. But too many categories can create overlap. When there is overlap, you get confusion during review. It also makes portfolio discipline difficult. You may think you are diversified. But the holdings inside may repeat. That reduces efficiency.

Your portfolio now looks like:

Equity dominant

Hybrid for stability

Metals for hedge

So the broad direction is fine. But simplifying helps in long-term habit building.

» Fund Category Duplication
You hold:

Two flexi cap funds

One large and mid cap fund

One pure large cap fund

One mid cap fund

One small cap fund

Flexi cap funds already invest across large, mid, small. Then large and mid also overlaps. So the large cap exposure gets repeated. That may not add extra benefit. But it increases monitoring complexity.

So I suggest rationalising. Keep one fund per category in core. Keep satellite space for only high conviction.

» Core and Satellite Strategy
A structured portfolio follows core and satellite method.

Core portfolio should be:

Simple

Long term

Stable

Satellite portfolio can be:

High growth

Concentrated

Based on your thinking level, you can structure like this:

Core funds:

One large cap

One flexi cap

One hybrid equity and debt fund

One balanced advantage type fund

Satellite funds:

One mid cap

One small cap

One metal allocation if needed

This division gives clarity. You can continue SIPs with review every year. No need to stop and restart often. That reduces behavioural mistakes.

» Your Current SIP List Review with Suggested Streamlining

You can consider continuing:

One flexi cap

One large cap

One mid cap

One small cap

One balanced advantage

One equity and debt hybrid

You may reconsider keeping both flexi caps and both gold silver funds. One of each category is enough. Because too many funds do not increase returns. It complicates tracking.

Precious metal funds should not be more than 5 to 7 percent in your portfolio. This is because metals are hedge assets. They do not create compounding like equity. They act as protection during cycles. So keep them small.

» How to Use the Rs 6 Lakh Lump Sum
You asked about lump sum investing. This is important. Lump sum should not go fully into equity at one time. Markets move in cycles. So use a staggered method. You can invest the lump sum through STP (Systematic Transfer Plan). You can keep the amount in a liquid fund and set STP toward your chosen growth funds over 6 to 12 months.

This reduces timing risk. It also creates discipline. So your Rs 6 lakh can be deployed gradually. You may use 50% towards core equity funds and 30% toward satellite growth category. The remaining 20% can go into hybrid category. This gives balance and comfort.

» Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
One important point many investors miss. Direct funds look cheaper. But they demand deep knowledge, discipline, and behaviour control. Most investors lose more through emotional selling and wrong timing than they save on expense ratio.

With regular funds through a Mutual Fund Distributor with Certified Financial Planner qualification, you get guidance, structure and correction. The advisory discipline protects you during market extremes. That is more valuable than a small saving in expense ratio.

A personalised planner also tracks portfolio drift, rebalancing need and category shifts. So regular fund investing gives long-term benefit and behaviour coaching.

» Actively Managed Funds over Index or ETF
Some investors choose index funds or ETF thinking they are simple and cheap. But they ignore drawbacks.

Index funds or ETF will not avoid weak companies in the index. They will invest whether the company grows or struggles. There is no fund manager decision making. So when markets are at peak, index funds continue aggressive exposure. In downturns also they fall fully. There is no cushion.

Actively managed funds work with research teams. They can avoid bad sectors. They can shift allocation based on market and economy. Over long term, this gives better alpha and stability. So continuing with actively managed funds creates better wealth compounding.

» SIP Continuation Strategy
Once the rationalisation is done, continue SIPs every month without interruption. Pause and restart behaviour damages compounding power. SIP works best when you go through all market cycles. You benefit more during corrections because cost averaging works.

So continue SIP amount. You can also review SIP increase every year based on income. Increasing SIP by 10 to 15 percent every year helps you reach large corpus faster.

» Asset Allocation Based Approach
One key point in wealth creation is having the right asset mix. Equity gives growth. Hybrid gives balance. Metals give hedge. Debt gives safety. Your asset allocation should stay aligned to your risk profile and time horizon.

Since you are young and have long term horizon, higher equity allocation is fine. But as time moves, rebalancing is important. Rebalancing protects gains and restores allocation.

So review your asset allocation every year or during major life events like child birth, home buying or retirement planning.

» Behaviour Management
Many portfolios fail not due to bad funds. They fail due to bad decisions. Selling during correction. Stopping SIP when market falls. Chasing past return performance. These mistakes reduce wealth.

Your discipline so far is good. Continue to stay patient during volatility. Equity rewards patience and time.

» Financial Goals Clarity
Since you have no children now, you can decide your long-term goals. Typical goals may include:

Retirement

Future child education

Dream lifestyle purchase

Health care reserves

When goals are clear, investment purpose becomes stronger. So you can map each fund category to goal horizon. Short-term goals should not use equity. Long-term goals should use equity with hybrid support.

» Role of Review and Monitoring
Review once in a year is enough. Frequent review can create anxiety. Annual review helps check:

Fund performance

Expense drift

Category relevance

Allocation balance

Then adjust only if needed. This progress helps you stay confident and aligned.

» Taxation Awareness
Equity mutual funds taxation rules are:

Short term (below one year holding) taxable at 20 percent

Long term (above one year holding) gains above Rs 1.25 lakh taxable at 12.5 percent

Debt mutual funds are taxed as per your income slab.

So always hold equity funds for long term. That reduces tax impact and gives better growth.

» SIP Increase Plan
You can create a simple plan to increase SIP over time. For example:

Increase SIP at every salary increment

Increase SIP during bonus time

Use rewards or extra income for investing

This habit accelerates wealth. So by the time you reach 45 to 50 years, your investments could reach a strong level.

» Insurance and Protection
Before investing large, ensure you have term insurance and health insurance. If not already done, it is important. Insurance protects wealth. Without insurance, even a small medical event can impact investment plan. So review this part also. Since you are married, cover both.

» Wealth Behaviour Mindset
You are already disciplined. Just keep these simple principles:

Invest without stopping

Review once a year

Avoid funds overlap

Follow asset allocation

Avoid reacting to media noise

This helps you reach long term milestones.

» Finally
You are on the right track. Only fine tuning and simplification is needed. Your discipline is visible. Your portfolio will grow well with structure, patience and periodic review. Use the Rs 6 lakh with STP approach. And continue SIP with rationalised categories.

With time and consistency, wealth creation becomes effortless and peaceful. You just need to stay committed and avoid overthinking during market movements.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Dr Dipankar

Dr Dipankar Dutta  |1837 Answers  |Ask -

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Dec 05, 2025

Career
Dear Sir, I did my BTech from a normal engineering college not very famous. The teaching was not great and hence i did not study well. I tried my best to learn coding including all the technologies like html,css,javascript,react js,dba,php because i wanted to be a web developer But nothing seem to enter my head except html and css. I don't understand a language which has more complexities. Is it because of my lack of experience or not devoting enough time. I am not sure. I did many courses online and tried to do diplomas also abroad which i passed somehow. I recently joined android development course because i like apps but the teaching was so fast that i could not memorize anything. There was no time to even take notes down. During the course i did assignments and understood the code because i have to pass but after the course is over i tend to forget everything. I attempted a lot of interviews. Some of them i even got but could not perform well so they let me go. Now due to the AI booming and job markets in a bad shape i am re-thinking whether to keep studying or whether its just time waste. Since 3 years i am doing labour type of jobs which does not yield anything to me for survival and to pay my expenses. I have the quest to learn everything but as soon as i sit in front of the computer i listen to music or read something else. What should i do to stay more focused? What should i do to make myself believe confident. Is there still scope of IT in todays world? Kindly advise.
Ans: Your story does not show failure.
It shows persistence, effort, and desire to improve.

Most people give up.
You didn’t.
That means you will succeed — but with the right method, not the old one.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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