Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Love Guru

Love Guru   |204 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 07, 2022

Love Guru has been answering relationship and romance related questions on Rediff.com for over 13 years. She won't mince words when telling you what the problem is and what you can do about it. If you want a fresh perspective from an unbiased, objective-thinking individual about your relationship woes, Love Guru could just be the person you need to need to hear from.... more
Anonymous Question by Anonymous on Oct 07, 2022Hindi
Listen
Relationship

Dear Love Guru, 
I like a boy in my class. I am not sure if he likes me as well. But when I smile, he smiles back. At times he comes over and has his lunch with my friends and me. I want to take this ahead but I am not sure what to do? Should I directly speak with him? Or should I wait for him to speak with me? I am scared that he will lose interest in me.

Ans:

Why doubt yourself so much? He smiles at you, lunches with you...Maybe it's time to break the ice and at least start talking to him?

You'll see where the conversations lead and you'll soon know for sure whether he's genuinely interested or not.

And remember to be yourself. You don't have to overtly try and impress anyone, a person should like you for who you are.

 

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Love Guru

Love Guru   |204 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 20, 2022

Listen
Relationship
Dear Love Guru Offline college has started and, in the very first week, I have really, really liked this boy. I am not a frivolous kind of person and I never thought something like this would happen to me college. We don’t know each other really, we are just classmates. It’s all very awkward for me and my friends can see I like him and they tease me. It will be worse if he comes to know. I cannot discuss this with my family, I don’t want advice from my friends who are my age. Can you tell me what I should do now? Confused
Ans:

It’s just a college crush, my dear…nothing to get so uptight about. It’s normal at your age.

You can tell your friends you don’t want him to know, but so what if he does? Maybe he likes you too or will ask you out?

There’s really no set course to follow in these matters. Just enjoy your college days and years!

 

Dear Love Guru
This is not exactly a love problem but kind of related.
My ex and my good friend are engaged and it’s left me feeling very awkward.
It’s uncomfortable to see her with him.
I don’t want to give up the group or them because we are all very good friends.
Everyone’s struggling to adapt to the new dynamics and I’m feeling bad.
How do I handle this?

The way you’re feeling is perfectly natural and this situation is more common than you think.

I know of someone who has been in the exact same position as you and he was the bigger person back then.

Today, things are so normal between him and the couple; they’re still good friends and laugh about what was a few years ago.

My point is, what you want to achieve -- a new normal -- is very possible.

Since you’re all within the same group, I’d suggest riding things out. You make an effort to normalise things and they will do the same. The new dynamic will become the norm in time, you’ll see.

Let time take away your discomfort. It will.

 

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |475 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 30, 2023

Latest Questions
Dr Nagarajan Jsk

Dr Nagarajan Jsk   |186 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Dec 27, 2024

Listen
Dr Shakeeb Ahmed

Dr Shakeeb Ahmed Khan  |132 Answers  |Ask -

Physiotherapist - Answered on Dec 27, 2024

Listen
Health
Knee Replacement- My doctor has advised me total knee replacement in right knee after examining X ray, as I am suffering from pain in right knee for last 12 months. Whether I have any options to avoid it or better to do to live pain free life after operation. I am worried about side effects, if any. Thanks Ganesh Surana
Ans: Dear Mr. Surana,
Thank you for your query. If your doctor has recommended a total knee replacement, it is likely based on the severity of your condition as indicated by the X-ray and your ongoing pain. However, you may still explore conservative options before deciding on surgery. I suggest consulting a physiotherapist for a comprehensive rehabilitation program. Physiotherapy can help strengthen the muscles around the knee, improve joint stability, and potentially reduce pain.
That said, your age and weight also play an important role in determining the best course of action. If you are overweight, weight management can significantly reduce stress on the knee joint and alleviate symptoms. Lifestyle changes, such as a tailored exercise regimen and a healthy diet, can also be beneficial.

If conservative measures don’t provide sufficient relief, total knee replacement may be the best option for living a pain-free life. It’s natural to be concerned about side effects, but modern surgical techniques and post-operative care have made the procedure highly effective and safe. Discuss all your concerns with your doctor and physiotherapist to make an informed decision.
Wishing you the best,

...Read more

Dr Shakeeb Ahmed

Dr Shakeeb Ahmed Khan  |132 Answers  |Ask -

Physiotherapist - Answered on Dec 27, 2024

Listen
Health
I AM HAVING UMBLICAL HERNEA PROBLEM.DOCOTR SUGGESTED ME TO BRING DOWN MY WEIGHT AND REDUCE FATTY BELLY BEFORE SURGERY.HE SUGGESTED ME TO WAIT FOR SURGERY TILL MY WEIGHT COMES DOWN FROM 92 KGS TO A REASONABLE LEVEL.PLEASE SUGGST ME WHAT EXERCISES i CAN DO TO ELIMINATE THE FAR BELLY WITHOUT DETERIORATING MY UMBLICAL HERNEA PROBLEM.PLEASE SUGGEST ME EXERCISES TO BRING DOWN MY BELLY. THANKS AND REGARDS. NVRSRINIVAS
Ans: Dear Mr. Srinivas,

Thank you for your query. Weight reduction is a gradual process that requires consistent effort and a balanced approach. It is advisable to consult a physiotherapist and a nutritionist to guide you through this journey. Focus on a high-protein, low-carbohydrate diet to support weight loss while maintaining muscle mass. Ensure your meals are nutritious and create a calorie deficit.

For exercise, start with low-impact aerobic activities such as walking, cycling, or swimming, as these can burn calories without putting pressure on your hernia. Incorporate gentle core-strengthening exercises like pelvic tilts and side planks to build core stability without straining the affected area. If suitable, include short bursts of high-intensity workouts or moderate-intensity, long-duration activities such as brisk walking or light jogging to enhance endurance and fat loss. Additionally, light resistance training can help maintain muscle mass, but avoid exercises that strain your abdominal muscles or involve heavy lifting.

Always consult a physiotherapist before starting any exercise program to ensure it is safe and appropriate for your condition. Wishing you success in your weight loss journey and a smooth recovery.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7363 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 27, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 22, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
I have lost money around 8 lakhs in gambling now i want to restart my life fresh i need to settle my debts and loan with bank and NBFCs is it possible to settle money at 70 percent waived off
Ans: Restarting your life after financial setbacks is possible with a disciplined approach. Settling your debts with banks and NBFCs requires a strategic plan, negotiation, and commitment. Here's a 360-degree approach to help you resolve your situation:

Assess Your Current Financial Position
List All Debts: Create a detailed list of all outstanding loans and debts, including principal, interest, and penalties.

Identify Income Sources: Calculate your monthly income and any other sources of funds.

Evaluate Essential Expenses: Identify non-negotiable expenses such as rent, food, utilities, and transport.

Determine Negotiable Debts: Focus on debts with higher interest rates or legal implications.

Negotiating with Lenders
Possibility of Settling at 70% Waiver
Banks and NBFCs Are Open to Negotiation: They prefer recovering some amount rather than declaring a loan as non-performing.

Settlement Terms Vary: Each lender may have unique policies. Some might agree to 70% waiver, but others may not.

Present Your Case Transparently: Show proof of your financial hardship. Explain your inability to pay in full.

Request a One-Time Settlement (OTS): Offer to pay a lump sum of the waived-off amount to close the debt.

Steps to Negotiate Effectively
Reach Out to the Right Department: Contact the collections or recovery department of your lender.

Seek Professional Help: A certified financial planner or debt resolution expert can negotiate on your behalf.

Prepare a Settlement Plan: Propose a realistic amount you can pay. Mention the sources for this payment.

Ask for Written Confirmation: Ensure the lender provides a formal agreement on the waived-off amount.

Negotiate for Reduced Interest and Penalties: Request removal of penalties and reduction of interest rates.

Managing Your Financial Obligations
Repayment Strategy
Prioritise High-Interest Loans: Focus on clearing loans with higher interest rates first.

Consolidate Debts: Consider consolidating multiple loans into one with a lower interest rate.

Use Liquid Assets Wisely: If you have savings or assets, use them to reduce your debt burden.

Building a Fresh Financial Foundation
Avoid Gambling and High-Risk Activities
Adopt Healthy Habits: Seek professional help if gambling is an addiction. Join support groups like Gamblers Anonymous.

Focus on Financial Literacy: Learn to manage your money effectively through courses or books.

Create a Budget and Emergency Fund
Track Income and Expenses: Use apps or spreadsheets to monitor your financial activity.

Save for Emergencies: Set aside 3–6 months of expenses as a safety net.

Restart Investments Gradually
Start with SIPs: Begin investing small amounts in mutual funds. Avoid direct stock trading initially.

Build a Retirement Corpus: Plan for long-term financial security systematically.

Final Insights
Rebuilding your life after a financial setback takes effort but is achievable. Focus on negotiating your debts transparently and settling them systematically. Learn from past mistakes and adopt disciplined financial habits. Restart your journey with renewed confidence and a commitment to avoid risky behaviours. Seek professional guidance when needed to make informed decisions.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |806 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Dec 27, 2024

Listen
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x