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Mohit

Mohit Arora  | Answer  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Feb 06, 2023

Mohit Arora is a relationship coach, image consultant, soft skills trainer and the founder of Real Dating School. He has a BTech degree in computer science from the Rayat & Bahra Institute of Engineering and Biotechnology, Mohali, Punjab. He has been conducting customised skilling and communication workshops since 2014.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 06, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

hello Mohit, I'm scared every time I try and communicate with my boyfriend about relationship issues in the past, what can I do to ease my mind when opening up?

Ans: Have you asked yourself - why are you scared? What are you scared of?

If you feel he can leave you if you discuss it, then it's not worth to be in their relationship anyway.

A healthy relationships inspires open communication and non judgemental attitude.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |600 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 20, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 20, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I met my this guy through my father in the arranged marriage setup. We developed a great rapport and a week ago,we got engaged.My fiancé is a really sweet guy! He has asked about my love life in the past,which i denied of having one. Even though he shared of a girl proposing him.Actually, i can share if the need arises but i am little afraid to share now,because when i shared my past with my former partner,he continued to taunt me throughout our relationship and never let me breath easily despite proving my innocence. I dont know what to do regarding my fiance? Should i tell him or just liet it be?
Ans: It's understandable to feel hesitant about sharing your past given your previous experience. Trust and transparency are important in a relationship, but timing and context matter as well. Since your fiancé has already shared some of his past with you, this indicates he values openness. However, your past experiences have taught you to be cautious. It might be helpful to observe and build trust in your current relationship before disclosing your past. If your fiancé continues to show understanding and kindness, it could create a safe space for you to share more about yourself. When you do decide to share, frame it as a way to build deeper trust and intimacy, emphasizing that past experiences have shaped who you are today. If he truly respects and cares for you, he will appreciate your honesty and the strength it took to share your story. Remember, the right partner will support and accept all parts of your journey.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1617 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 12, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I'm in a happy relationship with my boyfriend since 1.5 years. Before meeting him I had a relationship of around1.3 years(he cheated on me) and my mother got to know about it when she saw me crying and i end up telling her about my relationship(now ex). So I just need advice, should I tell my current boyfriend that my mother know about my ex? Now My mother somehow almost got to know about my current relationship also and i have told about this to my boyfriend but should I tell him that she knows about my past also.? Would he be okay with it or he will get upset about it that i haven't told him about this prior?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
How will it matter if your boyfriend knows about your mother being in the know about your past relationship?
Why will he be bothered by it? I just don't understand why this is an issue of you or anyone?

Your words:
i have told about this to my boyfriend but should I tell him that she knows about my past also.
My thoughts:
What will this do if you tell him that she knows about your past?

Your words:
Would he be okay with it or he will get upset about it that i haven't told him about this prior?
My thoughts:
Maybe you should tell him about your past and not worry that he should know that your mother knows about your past

I still feel what you actually want to ask me is not very clear to you; be honest with yourself so that when you ask your question you will be able to get better guidance from me...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |600 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 28, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 28, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir, we have completed 8 months of marriage and still my husband has trust issues about me, like I would have relation or contact with other person but I'm not having any relationship with anyone after marriage and even not connecting to anyone nor any ex person called or contact me from any media or app, . Since then I'm trying to clear my husbands doubt every time he asks me about it ...plzz tell me how do I make him to trust me .
Ans: The first thing to consider is that trust is something that takes time to build, and it is not something you can simply “prove” by answering his questions or explaining yourself over and over again. Trust is a process that requires consistent actions over time, and both partners need to contribute to that process. While you’re being open and transparent, it’s also important that your husband acknowledges that trust is a two-way street. He may have unresolved issues or past experiences that make it difficult for him to feel secure, and these need to be addressed if you want to move forward in a healthy way.

One of the challenges you face is the need for patience—both with him and with yourself. Reassuring your husband is important, but it’s equally important to create a space for deeper conversations about the root of his insecurities. Have you been able to sit down with him and gently ask what specifically triggers his doubts? You may want to approach this from a place of curiosity and care, without getting defensive. Understanding the underlying causes of his fears can give you both a clearer sense of how to work together to address them.

At the same time, it’s important to set emotional boundaries for yourself. While you want to support your husband, you shouldn’t feel like you need to constantly prove your loyalty or justify your actions. If you find yourself repeating the same explanations or feeling pressured to give constant reassurances, it can be emotionally draining. It’s okay to acknowledge his fears, but also to let him know that trust is something that needs to be built over time, and you need space to nurture the relationship without feeling constantly questioned.

In cases where trust issues persist despite your best efforts, it can sometimes be helpful to involve a third party, like a therapist or counselor. It may feel intimidating or unnecessary at first, but professional help can provide a neutral space for both of you to explore deeper issues—whether they are related to past experiences, emotional insecurities, or patterns of behavior. A counselor can also guide you in having more productive conversations and finding healthier ways to cope with these challenges as a couple.

Finally, remember that this process is not just about reassuring your husband, but also about protecting your own emotional wellbeing. You are not responsible for his insecurities, and while you can support him, you also deserve a relationship where you feel seen, heard, and trusted. It’s important to take care of your emotional health, too, and to know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect, trust, and understanding. Healing takes time, and while the journey may not be easy, with the right support and communication, it is possible for both of you to work through this.

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8781 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 04, 2025

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Money
Good evening. Me and my wife ate both 42 years old. Both are working professionals. We have combined income around 4 to 4.5 lakhs per month. Average total monthly expenses for family around 85k(total 5 members). Investment- Shares- 1.45 Cr(present value) MF- 82 lakhs(present value) Monthly Sip- 22 k running(small cap,multicap,flexicap) Health insurance- 25 lakh floater woth 1 Cr super top up. Term plan- 2 crore for each Apartment cost - 90 lakhs(loan closed) Own home price- around 65 lakhs 10 years old daughter i have. Planning for future studies after 6 years- around 60 lakhs(inflation not calculated). Would like to retire at 58 to 60 years of age. Considering moderate lifestyles, how should I plan further? Thanks
Ans: You have five family members. Your spending pattern is moderate.



You own equity shares worth Rs. 1.45 crore.



Mutual fund investments are worth Rs. 82 lakhs.



Running SIPs of Rs. 22,000 in small cap, multicap, and flexicap funds.



You have a home costing Rs. 90 lakhs. Loan is fully paid.



You also own another house worth Rs. 65 lakhs.



Health insurance of Rs. 25 lakhs floater + Rs. 1 crore super top-up.



Term insurance of Rs. 2 crore each for you and your wife.



Daughter is 10 years old. Need Rs. 60 lakhs after 6 years for education.



Planning to retire between age 58 and 60.



Appreciation and Positives

You have created strong asset base at an early stage.



Your insurance coverage is very good.



Loan-free status and regular SIP show great discipline.



Moderate expenses reflect financial maturity.



Suggestions for Daughter's Education

Education goal is within 6 years.



Equity shares and small cap MFs are high-risk for short-term goals.



Please move required Rs. 60 lakhs in staggered manner.



Shift to low-volatility hybrid or short-duration debt mutual funds.



Start switching now and complete it within next 3 years.



This will reduce volatility risk and protect capital.



Retirement Planning Evaluation

Retirement in 16 to 18 years is a medium to long-term goal.



Your existing corpus of Rs. 2.27 crore (Shares + MF) is strong.



SIP of Rs. 22,000 may not be enough for your target retirement.



Retirement corpus needed could be Rs. 6 crore to Rs. 7 crore approx.



You may need to increase SIP gradually to Rs. 50,000 or more.



Focus more on multicap and flexicap funds.



Avoid small cap for retirement corpus due to volatility.



Use active funds with good long-term track record.



Avoid index funds due to lack of downside protection.



Direct vs Regular MF Investing

Investing directly is not suitable for goal-based planning.



Direct plans lack handholding and review.



Regular plans through MFD + Certified Financial Planner offer continuous tracking.



Helps optimise portfolio and rebalance when needed.



Real Estate

No new investment is needed in real estate.



Real estate is illiquid and gives poor inflation-adjusted returns.



Holding two homes is enough.



Life Insurance

Term cover of Rs. 2 crore each is good.



Please review sum assured every 3 years.



Increase cover if income increases substantially.



Health Insurance

Rs. 25 lakh floater and Rs. 1 crore top-up are excellent.



You have good protection against medical expenses.



Estate Planning

Please write a Will for both of you.



Nominate each other and your daughter in investments.



Create a basic estate plan for smooth transition of assets.



Tax Planning

Track capital gains from equity MFs.



LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%.



STCG taxed at 20%.



Debt fund gains taxed as per your income slab.



What Needs Focus Now

Prioritise daughter’s education goal. Begin reallocation today.



Review and increase retirement SIP amount steadily.



Avoid direct and index funds.



Continue regular review of term cover, health cover.



Do not invest in annuities or real estate now.



Rebalance equity portfolio. Prefer diversified and actively managed MFs.



Finally

You are financially stable and secure.



You need few tactical shifts to optimise your plan.



Focus on structured goal-based investing.



Follow 360-degree approach for financial well-being.



Engage with a Certified Financial Planner regularly.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8781 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 03, 2025
Money
I am 52 years old. My wife, son and my father are dependent on me. My monthly income is 3.5L and my investment/savings are 10% of my income. I am living in my own home on which there is no liability. I have taken a loan of 75L for a second home for which the EMI will be around Rs.80,000/-. I have a portfolio of 50L in equities, 5L in MFs, 10L in FDs, 7L in PPF and 20L in physical gold. My father's home (worth 80L) is in my name, though I don't intend to sell it now. My biggest expenses are higher education for my son abroad and his marriage. I will want to work till atleast 65 years of age. How much will I need for my retirement and what should be my investment strategy. Please advise.
Ans: You are 52 now. You want to work till 65.

You have 13 more earning years. You are thinking about retirement planning. That is timely.

You also have dependent family members. You also have big goals like son’s education and marriage.

Now let’s build a 360-degree view and give a clear action plan.

Understanding Your Current Financial Profile
Your monthly income is Rs. 3.5 lakhs. That is a strong income.

Your current savings rate is only 10%. That is Rs. 35,000 per month.

You are living in your own house. There is no loan on it. That is a strength.

You have taken a loan of Rs. 75 lakhs for a second house. EMI is Rs. 80,000.

You already have assets in many categories. Let’s list them below.

Your Asset Distribution Today:

Equity portfolio: Rs. 50 lakhs

Mutual Funds: Rs. 5 lakhs

Fixed Deposits: Rs. 10 lakhs

PPF: Rs. 7 lakhs

Physical Gold: Rs. 20 lakhs

Father’s home (in your name): Rs. 80 lakhs (Not for sale now)

Immediate Observations on Current Strategy
Your debt EMI is around 23% of your monthly income. That is on the higher side.

Your overall investments are diversified, but need better allocation.

Your gold holding is 20% of your investment value. That is too high.

You have very low exposure to mutual funds. That needs to be increased.

Your equity value is high. But need to check the quality and risks.

You are saving only 10% of income. That needs to be doubled.

Your Key Goals Identified
Retirement at age 65. You have 13 years to plan.

Son’s higher education abroad. It is a near-term high-cost goal.

Son’s marriage. This will also need large funds.

Managing your father’s needs. It needs regular cash flow.

Regular income for wife in your absence. This must be secured too.

Retirement Fund Planning
Let’s first plan for retirement. That is your most important long-term need.

You are 52 now. You want to retire at 65. So, 13 years of saving time.

After 65, you may live for 25 more years. So plan for at least 25 years.

You may need Rs. 80,000 per month (in today’s value) during retirement.

Due to inflation, this will grow. You may need over Rs. 2 lakhs monthly at retirement.

So, you must create a retirement corpus of at least Rs. 4.5 to 5 crores.

This includes both lifestyle expenses and healthcare.

This corpus must be built step by step from now.

Strategy for Retirement Corpus
Start saving 25% of your income every month for retirement. That is Rs. 87,500.

Increase your mutual fund allocation for long-term goals.

Use actively managed funds. Do not use index funds.

Index funds lack fund manager skill. They just copy the market.

In market downturns, index funds may fall harder.

Actively managed funds help manage risk better.

Also, do not invest in direct mutual funds.

Direct plans may save cost but offer no personal advice.

Instead, invest via MFDs who are guided by Certified Financial Planners.

You get personalised planning and continuous review.

Review asset allocation every year with help of your planner.

Education Planning for Son
This goal is coming soon. You will need a big amount.

Find out the total cost of his course. Include tuition, living, travel.

Start a dedicated SIP for this goal.

Use low-duration funds if the goal is less than 3 years away.

If you need funds within 2 years, avoid equity.

For 3-5 years horizon, use balanced allocation funds.

Don’t use FDs for long horizon goals. FD returns are not inflation-beating.

Also avoid gold for education goals. Gold is not predictable.

Use mutual funds with steady performance.

Rebalance quarterly if possible. This reduces risk.

Marriage Planning for Son
Set a budget for the wedding.

You still have time for this goal.

Use long-term mutual fund SIPs to build the marriage fund.

Choose good performing diversified funds.

Don’t stop SIPs midway.

Review once a year to check target progress.

Avoid investing in real estate for this goal.

Real estate has low liquidity and high entry cost.

Your EMI and Real Estate Strategy
EMI of Rs. 80,000 per month is fixed now.

That is around 23% of your monthly income.

Try to prepay this home loan faster.

Make annual part-payments if possible.

Reduce the interest outgo and loan term.

Don’t buy another property now.

Real estate has high cost and low flexibility.

Also, selling a property takes time and effort.

Instead of more properties, focus on mutual funds.

Mutual funds offer better liquidity and professional management.

Also, no maintenance cost like in property.

Optimising Your Investment Portfolio
Let’s optimise your current investments. Below are ideas:

Equities (Rs. 50 lakhs):

Review portfolio quality and sector allocation.

Exit high-risk or non-performing stocks.

Diversify better across sectors and themes.

Avoid too much exposure to small-cap or penny stocks.

Consult a Certified Financial Planner for portfolio review.

Mutual Funds (Rs. 5 lakhs):

This is very low compared to equity. Increase it step by step.

Add SIPs in actively managed funds.

Avoid NFOs and trendy sectoral funds.

FDs (Rs. 10 lakhs):

These give low returns after tax.

Keep only for emergency fund or 1-year goals.

Rest should be reallocated to better products.

PPF (Rs. 7 lakhs):

Continue yearly contributions till retirement.

This gives tax-free and safe returns.

Max out yearly limit for compounding benefits.

Gold (Rs. 20 lakhs):

This is 20% of your portfolio. That is too high.

Reduce it to 10% slowly.

Avoid physical gold. Instead shift to Sovereign Gold Bonds.

Physical gold has storage, wastage, and purity issues.

Family Protection Strategy
Life Insurance:

You must have a term plan of 15 to 20 times annual income.

This covers your family’s future if something happens to you.

Don’t buy investment-linked policies.

If you hold LIC or ULIP or endowment plans, surrender them.

Reinvest that amount in mutual funds.

Health Insurance:

Ensure separate cover for all family members.

Include your father and son too.

Corporate cover is not enough. Take individual policy.

Also add critical illness cover.

Estate Planning and Father’s Home
Your father’s home is in your name.

You don’t plan to sell now. That is fine.

Keep all documents clear and updated.

Make a registered Will. Mention distribution wishes clearly.

Nominate your wife and son in all financial instruments.

This avoids legal issues later.

Action Plan Summary
Increase your monthly saving to 25% of income

Use mutual fund SIPs to build retirement, education, marriage goals

Avoid index funds and direct plans. Use active funds via MFDs with CFP help

Reduce exposure to real estate and gold

Review equity portfolio with professional help

Prepay second home loan gradually

Secure family with term insurance and health cover

Rebalance portfolio yearly

Create Will and update nominations

Finally
You have strong income and some assets. That is a good start.

But current savings and portfolio allocation need changes.

Real estate and gold are high. Mutual fund exposure is low.

You need to shift slowly from fixed assets to liquid investments.

You also need goal-based planning. Separate funds for each goal.

Your retirement corpus target is Rs. 4.5 to 5 crores.

With 13 working years left, it is possible with discipline.

Take help from a Certified Financial Planner to build and monitor your plan.

Stay invested regularly. Review yearly. Protect your family always.

This approach will bring financial peace and clarity.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Vivek

Vivek Lala  |316 Answers  |Ask -

Tax, MF Expert - Answered on Jun 04, 2025

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8781 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 04, 2025Hindi
Money
Good morning sir, I am 32,from Andhra Pradesh, I don't have financial knowledge, I am marine engineer,I buy one land for 38lks two years before, recently 6months back but another land 60lakhs,and have 30lk cash in hand for my parents retirement. Now me my wife my daughter planing to move UK.we already paid 12lkhs remaining 28lakhs need to pay for uk process.we don't have any job in uk.we need to search after go there.Beofre going to uk.my friend forcing me to buy g+2 house which gets 30k rent.for that.i need to take 1.cr loan.plues need to my parents retirement money 30lakhs. Please suggest me how can proceed with this.i am totally confused
Ans: Age: 32

Profession: Marine Engineer

Location: Andhra Pradesh

Family: Wife and Daughter

Assets Owned:

Land purchased 2 years ago – Rs. 38 lakhs

Land purchased 6 months ago – Rs. 60 lakhs

Cash kept for parents’ retirement – Rs. 30 lakhs

Cash Outflow Already Done:

Rs. 12 lakhs paid for UK relocation process

Still Required for UK Relocation:

Rs. 28 lakhs remaining to pay

No Job Yet in UK

One Option Suggested by Friend:

Buy G+2 house

Cost involves Rs. 1 crore loan + use Rs. 30 lakhs retirement fund

Estimated rent Rs. 30,000 per month

Understanding the UK Move
1. Basic Expense Preparedness

You need to first complete UK relocation cost – Rs. 28 lakhs.

After that, you must have living expenses for at least 6 months.

For a family, monthly cost in the UK can be around Rs. 2.5 lakhs.

So you need Rs. 15 lakhs for six months survival.

Total required = Rs. 28 lakhs + Rs. 15 lakhs = Rs. 43 lakhs

You must arrange this before any other investment.

2. Job Readiness in UK

Job search may take 3 to 6 months.

Marine Engineering jobs exist but not guaranteed quickly.

Try to start applying before you travel.

Connect with people from your industry in UK online.

Jobless time in UK will pressure your savings.

3. Currency and Emergency Factors

UK expenses will be in British Pounds.

Currency value changes can affect your money.

You must carry buffer cash for emergencies.

No income, new country, new rules – safety money is important.

Evaluating Property Suggestion
1. Loan Size and EMI Pressure

Rs. 1 crore loan for house is very risky now.

EMI for Rs. 1 crore loan can be around Rs. 75,000 per month.

Your rental income is Rs. 30,000 per month only.

EMI gap is Rs. 45,000 per month.

No job in UK yet – this will break your cash flow.

2. Misuse of Parents’ Retirement Money

Rs. 30 lakhs is saved for your parents.

This is their safety for the rest of life.

Using this for buying property is risky and wrong.

Parents’ money must never be used for experiments.

They may not have future income to recover loss.

3. Real Estate Investment Problems

Real estate looks attractive but has big risks.

Rent is not guaranteed. Property repair cost is high.

Property is not easy to sell quickly if needed.

Price growth is not steady.

You will be in UK – managing this property from there is tough.

If tenant leaves, you will have zero income.

You will still pay full EMI every month.

4. Friend’s Suggestion Needs Caution

Friends can give ideas.

But you carry the financial burden, not them.

Your future, your parents, and your daughter depend on this.

One mistake can destroy years of your work.

Always make independent decisions after evaluating risk.

What You Should Do Now
1. Protect Your UK Relocation Plan

Complete the Rs. 28 lakhs balance for UK.

Keep extra Rs. 15 lakhs ready as survival fund for 6 months.

This must be your first priority now.

2. Keep Parents’ Retirement Fund Safe

Do not touch the Rs. 30 lakhs set aside for parents.

This is for their medical needs and living support.

Invest this amount in actively managed mutual funds.

Invest through a Certified Financial Planner.

Let a trusted Mutual Fund Distributor guide the execution.

3. Avoid Real Estate Investments Now

Do not buy property now.

Your income is not stable.

You will move abroad soon.

Rental return is low.

EMI is very high.

Risk is too much compared to benefit.

4. Start Job Search Early in UK

Apply for jobs in marine field.

Connect with UK professionals on job portals.

Update your resume in UK format.

Have video interviews before landing in UK.

Look for backup jobs if marine role takes time.

5. Secure Your Family in UK

Keep medical insurance ready for family.

Know the basic rights and rules in UK.

Look for schools early if needed.

Reduce lifestyle expenses in beginning phase.

Focus on income first.

6. Begin Systematic Investment for Long Term

Once job is secured, begin long term investments.

Use actively managed mutual funds with SIP.

Choose equity and hybrid mutual funds for long term growth.

Avoid index funds. They don’t beat inflation always.

Index funds have no flexibility in fund manager decisions.

Active funds adjust faster to market changes.

7. Use Certified Financial Planner for Support

Work with a CFP to make a full financial plan.

Planner will help in India and abroad strategy.

CFP knows how to balance between family, retirement, and wealth creation.

A planner gives regular review and adjustments.

Finally
Your current focus should be simple.

Complete UK relocation cost.

Keep 6 months emergency fund.

Protect your parents’ Rs. 30 lakhs retirement money.

Avoid risky new loans and real estate deals.

Settle in UK first. Get income. Then start long term investment plan.

Work with a Certified Financial Planner for all key money decisions.

You are already taking steps towards a better life. That is a great start.

With the right moves now, your future will be financially strong.

Take one step at a time with full care.

Don’t fall into pressure or shortcuts.

Secure your parents, your family and yourself first.

Then grow your wealth with smart and safe investments.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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