Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Anu

Anu Krishna  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 13, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Apr 23, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship

Hello, I am married for the last 15 years with 2 kids. All though for entire period of this 15 years has been a roller coaster in the relationship, All of a sudden since the last 7 months the relationship has detoriated with my wife sleeping with the kids, not talking to me, cutting my social circles. Have tried talking to her directly and through some common links, but she does not talk & infact has cut all the channels. i have tried being home all the time and do all the house hold cores, take care of the children, but no impact on her. She is a deperession patient and refuses to consult the doctor. I feel i had enough and want to look options for seperation. Kindly advise

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It's unfortunate that you have waited this long to take note of how your relationship has been deteriorating. Also, has your wife been clinically diagnosed as having depression? If not, please don't assume as it will pose an issue while working on your marriage.
Seek the help of a marriage therapist who can guide the two of you back into rebuilding the marriage. Sleeping separately is a huge signal that she has cut off physically and emotionally from you and there could be numerous reasons along the way for it./ Don't delay seeing a professional and take this step not to get into a blame game situation but to actually work on your marriage. Make this humble attempt as it takes one rash move to end things.

But if you feel strongly that nothing is working, consult with a lawyer who specializes in separation

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: https://www.facebook.com/anukrish07/ AND https://www.linkedin.com/in/anukrishna-joyofserving/

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 12, 2021

Listen
Relationship
Dear Anu, I am a 44-year-old married man. My wife and I had a love marriage. But just after the birth of our second child we started developing some smaller differences and issues. Nothing really major. However my wife started staying away from me physically. The intimacy and love in the relationship reduced and eventually stopped. Along the way I tried to go close to her but she wasn't interested. I tried a lot but it didn't help. We even tried to go to the counselor but she wasn't quite interested so we stopped midway. Now eight years have passed since we have had any physical closeness. We live like roommates just looking after the kids. However now my wife is making attempts to come close to me but somehow I don't feel anything for her and I am not co-operating. I feel like I just want to go away from everyone and start living independently. What is your advice? We have two daughters.
Ans: Dear N, What went through your wife’s mind at the time of the birth of your second child is something that needs to be addressed.

Maybe the work of bringing up two children exhausted her or there was a hormonal disturbance that made her lose interest. But let bygones be bygones.

Now that she is trying to get closer, maybe you can also try to see what the two of you can do to rebuild the closeness.

Rather than jump straight to sex, create closeness step by step.

Spend quality time together, watch movies, engage in a hobby together, cook together…the fondness and affection outside the bedroom might help breaking the ice and you start to at least engage in an affectionate manner towards one another.

It is easy to walk out of a marriage but do remember what the reason to walk out will be?

After a few years, it might not been worth it at all…Why not at least give the above suggestions a try?

Engage as friends with no expectations from one another and let the purpose be a happy engagement just like the one we have with out friends.

You also have two daughters who definitely want to be in a loving family; so give this a chance and see if it works out. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8098 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 13, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 11, 2025Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi, I have the following funds part of my SIP and the last 4 funds are my one time lump sum of 35K each and invested sometime in November last year. Are these good to hold (lump sum) and rest as SIP for another 5 years. 1 Kotak Flexicap Fund - Reg Gr 2 Kotak Flexicap Fund - Dir Gr 3 Tata Multi Asset Opp Dir Gr 4 TATA Nifty 50 Index Dir Pl 5 Technology Plan - Direct - Growth 6 Bandhan Sterling Value Fund-(Reg PIn) -Gr 7 Nifty Smallcap250 Quality 50 Index Fund - Dir - G 8 | HDFC Dividend Yield Direct Growth 9 Quant Large and Mid Cap Fund Direct Growth 10 Quant Multi Asset Fund Direct Growth 11 Groww Nifty Non Cyclical Consumer Index Fund Direct Growth 12 Motilal Oswal Midcap Fund Direct Growth Thanks in advance for your guidance.
Ans: You have invested in multiple funds through SIP and lump sum. Holding them for the next 5 years is a good approach. However, it is important to check if your portfolio is diversified, aligned with your goals, and tax-efficient.

Overlap Between Funds
Your portfolio has multiple funds from the same category.

Too many similar funds do not improve returns but make tracking difficult.

Checking fund overlap can help avoid duplication.

Actively Managed vs Index Funds
You have index funds in your portfolio.

Index funds do not offer downside protection in market corrections.

Actively managed funds can outperform the index in volatile markets.

Switching from index funds to actively managed funds can improve growth.

Direct vs Regular Funds
You have invested in direct funds.

Direct funds may seem cheaper, but they lack expert guidance.

Investing through an MFD with CFP credentials ensures better selection and tracking.

Regular funds provide better decision-making support over time.

Sector-Specific and Thematic Funds
You hold a technology fund.

Sector funds are high-risk, as they depend on one industry’s performance.

If the sector underperforms, returns may be negative for years.

A diversified approach reduces risk compared to sector-based investing.

Smallcap and Midcap Allocation
You have smallcap and midcap funds.

These funds can be highly volatile in the short term.

Holding them for 5+ years is necessary to reduce risk.

Ensure you rebalance if the portfolio gets too aggressive.

Multi-Asset and Dividend Yield Funds
Multi-asset funds provide stability during market corrections.

Dividend yield funds are suitable for conservative investors.

These funds help in balancing the portfolio between risk and return.

Final Insights
Reduce overlapping funds and focus on fewer, well-performing funds.

Exit index funds and shift to actively managed funds for better growth.

Consider switching from direct funds to regular funds for expert tracking.

Keep sector funds below 10% of your portfolio to avoid concentration risk.

Continue SIPs in high-quality diversified funds for long-term wealth creation.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8098 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 13, 2025

Listen
Money
Can I run my family with 15 k exp and 20k retirement income
Ans: You have a monthly retirement income of Rs 20,000 and expect monthly expenses of Rs 15,000. On paper, this looks manageable, but there are important financial factors to consider. Let us analyse whether this income will be sufficient for the long term.

Cost of Living and Inflation Impact
Expenses will increase over time due to inflation.

If inflation is 6% per year, your Rs 15,000 monthly expenses may double in 12 years.

If income remains Rs 20,000, the gap between income and expenses will widen.

Healthcare and Medical Costs
Medical expenses increase with age.

Even with health insurance, out-of-pocket medical costs can rise.

If a medical emergency arises, your savings could be depleted quickly.

Emergency Fund Requirement
A sudden family emergency can strain finances.

Having at least 2–3 years' worth of expenses in a liquid fund is necessary.

If you do not have an emergency fund, your retirement income may not be sufficient.

Unplanned Expenses and Lifestyle Changes
New financial needs may arise, such as helping family members or home repairs.

You may want to travel, pursue hobbies, or engage in social activities.

A fixed retirement income can make such expenses challenging.

Investment Strategy for Long-Term Security
To beat inflation, invest a portion of savings in growth-oriented assets.

A mix of equity and debt funds will help generate better returns.

A Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP) from equity funds can provide a higher monthly income.

Alternative Income Sources
Consider part-time work, freelancing, or consulting if possible.

Rental income or dividends from investments can support retirement cash flow.

Final Insights
Rs 20,000 may be enough now, but inflation and rising costs can make it insufficient later.

A combination of investments, emergency funds, and alternate income sources will provide financial security.

Regularly review and adjust your financial plan to sustain your retirement lifestyle.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8098 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 13, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 11, 2025Hindi
Listen
Money
Hello sir, I have about 28 lakhs invested in different MF. Now i want a SWP of 35000 per month from that total fund. Looking at the current market situation I was either thinking if dividing the fund between debt 30% and equity 70%. But instead of investing a lumpsum amounts will it make more sense to park all my funds in a dynamic debt fund and then every month do SIP of maybe one lakh each to equity fund or balanced fund. Also i would like to know what difference will it make in my investment returns between sip and lumpsum except ofcourse averageing the market volatility in case of SIP and getting more UNITS if done lumpsum.
Ans: You have Rs 28 lakh invested in mutual funds and want to withdraw Rs 35,000 per month through a Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP). You are considering whether to invest the corpus as a lump sum in a 70% equity – 30% debt allocation or to park the full amount in a debt fund and do an SIP of Rs 1 lakh per month into equity.

Your goal should be to generate stable withdrawals while preserving your capital and ensuring growth. Below is a structured approach to managing your funds wisely.

Understanding SWP and Its Impact on Your Corpus
SWP is a cash flow strategy, allowing regular withdrawals while the remaining corpus continues to grow.

The key challenge is to balance withdrawals and growth so that the corpus does not deplete too soon.

Investing in a mix of debt and equity will ensure stability while benefiting from market growth.

Option 1: Investing 70% in Equity and 30% in Debt
This allocation is suitable for long-term growth. Equity provides growth, while debt ensures stability.

A balanced portfolio helps manage volatility and ensures a steady SWP.

The downside is that a lump sum investment in equity exposes you to market fluctuations.

If the market falls after investing, the SWP may lead to selling equity at a lower value, reducing corpus longevity.

Option 2: Parking in a Debt Fund and Doing Monthly SIPs
This reduces market timing risk by investing gradually.

Debt funds provide low but steady returns, protecting the corpus while equity exposure increases.

SIPs spread the risk over time, ensuring better price averaging.

The downside is that debt funds provide lower returns, which may impact the final corpus.

SIP vs Lump Sum: Key Differences
SIP helps in market averaging, reducing the impact of volatility.

Lump sum investment can generate higher returns if the market performs well.

SIP is better for those worried about market crashes, while lump sum works well for long-term investors willing to take higher risks.

Best Strategy for You
A hybrid approach will work best:

Step 1: Park Rs 28 lakh in a low-duration or dynamic debt fund.

Step 2: Start an SIP of Rs 1 lakh per month into equity for 24–28 months.

Step 3: Withdraw Rs 35,000 per month from the debt fund until equity allocation builds up.

Step 4: After 2–3 years, rebalance to maintain a 60% equity – 40% debt allocation for stability.

Tax Implications of SWP
Withdrawals from equity funds held for over 1 year attract 12.5% tax on LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh.

Withdrawals before 1 year attract 20% STCG tax.

Withdrawals from debt funds are taxed as per your income tax slab.

Final Insights
A mix of debt and equity will ensure growth and stability in your SWP plan.

Parking the corpus in a debt fund first and then gradually shifting to equity is a safer approach.

Rebalancing every 2–3 years will help manage risk and sustain withdrawals.

Keep track of taxation to optimise post-tax returns.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8098 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 13, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 12, 2025Hindi
Listen
Money
Hello Sir, I am 46. Unemployed due to health reasons. I have 28 lakhs i want to invest in SWP . I need 35000 monthly. How long do I have before my fund runs out? How should I invest to make the most of it? I want my funds to appreciate as well to be atleast propionate to my need of 35000. Given- if i invest in lumpsum than I get higher number of units and if i take the SIP route it can negate the market volatility. Looking at the current market scanerio i believe it may take couple of years to see proper returns. I was also thinking of pooling the entire corpus in Aggressive debt funds and then do a SIP to an actively managed equity fund. Under these circumstances please provide fund names also. Thanks in advance.
Ans: You are 46 and unemployed due to health reasons. You need Rs 35,000 per month from your investments. Your goal is to make your funds last longer while allowing growth.

Let us analyse your options and create a plan.

Assessing Your Requirement
You need Rs 4.2 lakh per year (Rs 35,000 x 12 months).

Your corpus is Rs 28 lakh.

If you withdraw Rs 4.2 lakh annually without growth, your funds will last less than 7 years.

You need growth to sustain withdrawals for a longer period.

Challenges with a High SWP Rate
A SWP of 15% per year (Rs 4.2 lakh from Rs 28 lakh) is too high.

Safe withdrawal rates are usually 4-6% per year.

A high withdrawal rate will deplete your corpus fast.

Investment Strategy for SWP
You need a mix of equity and debt to balance growth and stability.

Step 1: Allocate Corpus Wisely
Equity (50%): Invest for growth.
Debt (50%): Keep funds for the next 5-6 years of withdrawals.
This approach helps maintain stability while allowing long-term appreciation.

Step 2: SWP from Debt Funds
Start your SWP from debt funds to avoid withdrawing from volatile equity investments.

Debt funds provide stability and minimise short-term risk.

This ensures your equity investments have time to grow.

Step 3: Systematic Transfer to Equity
Keep your equity allocation in a flexi-cap or multi-cap fund for diversification.

Invest in a systematic transfer plan (STP) from a debt fund to an equity fund.

This reduces market timing risk and balances volatility.

Expected Corpus Longevity
If your portfolio grows at 8-10% annually, your funds may last 10-12 years.

If the market performs well, your funds may last longer.

A lower withdrawal rate will further extend sustainability.

Alternative Options to Sustain Your Corpus
Reduce withdrawals: If possible, lower monthly expenses to Rs 25,000-30,000.

Part-time income: If health permits, explore work-from-home or passive income options.

Medical emergency fund: Keep at least Rs 2 lakh aside for medical needs.

Review investments: Rebalance every year to maintain growth and stability.

Final Insights
Your current withdrawal rate is high.

A balanced equity-debt approach can extend the longevity of your corpus.

Use SWP from debt funds and STP to equity for better returns.

Monitor the portfolio regularly to ensure sustainability.

If possible, reduce withdrawals slightly to make the corpus last longer.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8098 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 13, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 13, 2025Hindi
Listen
Money
Sir i have multiple loans and credit card bills which sums up 20 lakh and my monthly income is 30k i am not able to pay the emi anymore on time every month i am in deep stress in trying to pay the emi plz help
Ans: Your debt is high, and your income is low. Paying EMIs on time has become difficult. This situation needs an urgent plan.

You are not alone. Many people face similar financial struggles. With the right steps, you can come out of this stress.

Assess Your Debt Situation
Total loan and credit card debt: Rs 20 lakh.

Monthly income: Rs 30,000.

EMIs and credit card bills are unmanageable.

Stress is increasing due to financial burden.

The first step is to stop taking new loans or using credit cards.

Prioritise Your Debts
Credit card debt has the highest interest (30-40% per year).

Personal loans have high EMIs and penalties for delays.

Secured loans (home, car) should be managed to avoid asset loss.

Focus on clearing high-interest debts first.

Negotiate with Banks and Lenders
Contact your bank and request a loan restructuring.

Ask for a lower EMI with a longer repayment period.

Request a moratorium (temporary pause on EMI) if needed.

Convert credit card dues into an EMI loan with a lower interest rate.

Negotiate for a settlement if repayment is impossible.

Banks prefer to restructure loans rather than declare them as defaults.

Debt Consolidation Options
If you have a low-interest secured loan option (like a gold loan), consider using it to clear high-interest credit card debt.

Avoid taking another personal loan to clear old debts. It will worsen your situation.

Increase Your Income
Look for part-time or freelance work for extra income.

If possible, sell unused assets (bike, gadgets, jewelry) to reduce debt.

Discuss with family members for temporary financial help.

Cut Unnecessary Expenses
Reduce spending on non-essential items.

Stop using credit cards immediately.

Follow a strict budget and use cash or debit cards for expenses.

Seek Professional Help
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can help create a repayment plan.

If stress is overwhelming, consult a financial counselor or mental health professional.

Final Insights
Your situation is difficult, but a step-by-step plan will help.

Stop new loans and credit card usage immediately.

Contact banks to negotiate for lower EMIs or settlement options.

Increase income through extra work and reduce expenses.

Seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner.

You are not alone. With the right approach, you can come out of this financial struggle.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x