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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1424 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 13, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Apr 23, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hello, I am married for the last 15 years with 2 kids. All though for entire period of this 15 years has been a roller coaster in the relationship, All of a sudden since the last 7 months the relationship has detoriated with my wife sleeping with the kids, not talking to me, cutting my social circles. Have tried talking to her directly and through some common links, but she does not talk & infact has cut all the channels. i have tried being home all the time and do all the house hold cores, take care of the children, but no impact on her. She is a deperession patient and refuses to consult the doctor. I feel i had enough and want to look options for seperation. Kindly advise

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It's unfortunate that you have waited this long to take note of how your relationship has been deteriorating. Also, has your wife been clinically diagnosed as having depression? If not, please don't assume as it will pose an issue while working on your marriage.
Seek the help of a marriage therapist who can guide the two of you back into rebuilding the marriage. Sleeping separately is a huge signal that she has cut off physically and emotionally from you and there could be numerous reasons along the way for it./ Don't delay seeing a professional and take this step not to get into a blame game situation but to actually work on your marriage. Make this humble attempt as it takes one rash move to end things.

But if you feel strongly that nothing is working, consult with a lawyer who specializes in separation

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: https://www.facebook.com/anukrish07/ AND https://www.linkedin.com/in/anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1424 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 12, 2021

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Dear Anu, I am a 44-year-old married man. My wife and I had a love marriage. But just after the birth of our second child we started developing some smaller differences and issues. Nothing really major. However my wife started staying away from me physically. The intimacy and love in the relationship reduced and eventually stopped. Along the way I tried to go close to her but she wasn't interested. I tried a lot but it didn't help. We even tried to go to the counselor but she wasn't quite interested so we stopped midway. Now eight years have passed since we have had any physical closeness. We live like roommates just looking after the kids. However now my wife is making attempts to come close to me but somehow I don't feel anything for her and I am not co-operating. I feel like I just want to go away from everyone and start living independently. What is your advice? We have two daughters.
Ans: Dear N, What went through your wife’s mind at the time of the birth of your second child is something that needs to be addressed.

Maybe the work of bringing up two children exhausted her or there was a hormonal disturbance that made her lose interest. But let bygones be bygones.

Now that she is trying to get closer, maybe you can also try to see what the two of you can do to rebuild the closeness.

Rather than jump straight to sex, create closeness step by step.

Spend quality time together, watch movies, engage in a hobby together, cook together…the fondness and affection outside the bedroom might help breaking the ice and you start to at least engage in an affectionate manner towards one another.

It is easy to walk out of a marriage but do remember what the reason to walk out will be?

After a few years, it might not been worth it at all…Why not at least give the above suggestions a try?

Engage as friends with no expectations from one another and let the purpose be a happy engagement just like the one we have with out friends.

You also have two daughters who definitely want to be in a loving family; so give this a chance and see if it works out. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain.

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Asked by Anonymous - Nov 29, 2024Hindi
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I am 27 years old girl corona made my life a waste. Just before corona I left an assistant job to go for regular studies then due to corna I got stuck being jobless. I really wanted to study in regular as in graduation I did from open university. Time being I tried govt job preparation but nothing happened. I got gap of 2 years i couldn't find another job. At the end I did get my post graduation mba completed but I didn't get a job of my education all are of calling & backend. Currently its been 3-4 months nothing is working, application getting rejected every time. During final year exams my bf broke up with me from a 8 year long relationship. Please answer me
Ans: To rebuild your career after completing an MBA, identify transferable skills such as management, communication, leadership, and problem-solving, and match them with job roles beyond just calling and backend work. Revamp your resume by highlighting your educational qualifications and skills, and showcase internships, projects, or certifications completed during your MBA. Upskill strategically by considering short-term certifications relevant to your MBA specialization, such as digital marketing, project management, or data analytics.

Get a ton of useful information on "Resume Building," "LinkedIn Profile Building," "Job Search," and "Salary Negotiation Skills" by tuning in to the free webinars hosted by Vikram Anand, Sakshi Chandrasekar, and Sawan Kapoor. Take advantage of these kinds of free webinars to keep yourself busy and increase your self-assurance.

Job search strategy should include applying for jobs that match your skills, using job portals like LinkedIn, and Indeed, and networking actively on LinkedIn. Consider exploring freelance projects or paid internships related to your MBA specialization.

Emotional healing is essential, and it's important to acknowledge the pain of the loss of a relationship. Focus on self-care activities that uplift you, such as journaling, exercising, reading, or joining support groups. Practice mindfulness or meditation to reduce anxiety. Seek professional support if feelings of sadness or self-doubt persist.

Set small, achievable goals to avoid feeling overwhelmed and redefine success as personal growth, resilience, and continuous learning. Remember that progress takes time, and you are not alone in this phase. Stay patient and persistent, as your breakthrough will come.
All The BEST for Your Prosperous Future.

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on ‘Careers | Finance | Health | Relationships’.

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Asked by Anonymous - Oct 24, 2024Hindi
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Me and my boyfriend in a relationship from 5 years. My parents are happy with our relationship, but not his. I am Christian and he is Hindu. He tried to run away a few months ago to another state but his father spoke to authorities and caught him at an airport. He is now being monitored and has no way to escape. We want to seek legal help to get married but not sure where to look. We tried to look into special marriage act, but it requires 30 days notice meaning, his parents might find out and things get worse. Any advise is much appreciated on what help we can get legally.
Ans: First, it's essential to acknowledge the emotional strain this situation may be putting on both of you. It's okay to feel overwhelmed or uncertain, but your commitment to each other is a strong foundation to build upon. It's crucial to support each other emotionally through this process, as it will require patience, resilience, and understanding.

Additionally, you might consider looking into organizations or NGOs that support interfaith or inter-caste couples. These groups often have experience dealing with similar situations and can offer both legal advice and emotional support. They can also help navigate the legal process in a way that minimizes risk and ensures your rights are protected.

It's important to stay connected with people who support you both emotionally, whether it's friends, family, or support groups. Sharing your burden can lighten the emotional load and provide you with a network of allies who can help you through the process.

Remember, the love and commitment you share are powerful. While the road may be difficult, focusing on your shared goals and supporting each other through these challenges will strengthen your bond. Stay hopeful, seek the right help, and trust that you're making the best decisions for your future together.

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