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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1545 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 12, 2021

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
N Question by N on Aug 12, 2021Hindi
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Relationship

Dear Anu, I am a 44-year-old married man.

My wife and I had a love marriage. But just after the birth of our second child we started developing some smaller differences and issues.

Nothing really major. However my wife started staying away from me physically.

The intimacy and love in the relationship reduced and eventually stopped. Along the way I tried to go close to her but she wasn't interested.

I tried a lot but it didn't help. We even tried to go to the counselor but she wasn't quite interested so we stopped midway.

Now eight years have passed since we have had any physical closeness.

We live like roommates just looking after the kids. However now my wife is making attempts to come close to me but somehow I don't feel anything for her and I am not co-operating.

I feel like I just want to go away from everyone and start living independently. What is your advice? We have two daughters.

Ans: Dear N, What went through your wife’s mind at the time of the birth of your second child is something that needs to be addressed.

Maybe the work of bringing up two children exhausted her or there was a hormonal disturbance that made her lose interest. But let bygones be bygones.

Now that she is trying to get closer, maybe you can also try to see what the two of you can do to rebuild the closeness.

Rather than jump straight to sex, create closeness step by step.

Spend quality time together, watch movies, engage in a hobby together, cook together…the fondness and affection outside the bedroom might help breaking the ice and you start to at least engage in an affectionate manner towards one another.

It is easy to walk out of a marriage but do remember what the reason to walk out will be?

After a few years, it might not been worth it at all…Why not at least give the above suggestions a try?

Engage as friends with no expectations from one another and let the purpose be a happy engagement just like the one we have with out friends.

You also have two daughters who definitely want to be in a loving family; so give this a chance and see if it works out. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1545 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 23, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello, I am married for the last 15 years with 2 kids. All though for entire period of this 15 years has been a roller coaster in the relationship, All of a sudden since the last 7 months the relationship has detoriated with my wife sleeping with the kids, not talking to me, cutting my social circles. Have tried talking to her directly and through some common links, but she does not talk & infact has cut all the channels. i have tried being home all the time and do all the house hold cores, take care of the children, but no impact on her. She is a deperession patient and refuses to consult the doctor. I feel i had enough and want to look options for seperation. Kindly advise
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It's unfortunate that you have waited this long to take note of how your relationship has been deteriorating. Also, has your wife been clinically diagnosed as having depression? If not, please don't assume as it will pose an issue while working on your marriage.
Seek the help of a marriage therapist who can guide the two of you back into rebuilding the marriage. Sleeping separately is a huge signal that she has cut off physically and emotionally from you and there could be numerous reasons along the way for it./ Don't delay seeing a professional and take this step not to get into a blame game situation but to actually work on your marriage. Make this humble attempt as it takes one rash move to end things.

But if you feel strongly that nothing is working, consult with a lawyer who specializes in separation

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: https://www.facebook.com/anukrish07/ AND https://www.linkedin.com/in/anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1545 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 05, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 03, 2025
Relationship
Hi, my name is Dhruv, I have been married for 13 years. It was love marriage. We dont have any kids, though we tried but due to medical complications, we could not have a child. After a point of time, we both accepted the situation and moved on. Since last 3-4 years, slowly we have been drifting apart, though we are together but the love, feeling of togetherness has gone, we talk only about our regular lives, household chores, relatives etc but never about US. That feeling of being loved, even we don't hug each other anymore. Though we do care for each other but its not love anymore. Recently I met someone through work and somehow felt a connect with her, I could talk about things which I'm not able to talk with my wife. She make me feel that I'm still important and now I always think about her, want to be with her, talk to her. Though it makes me guilty also as somewhere in my heart I still love my wife and want to make it work. I am torn between what is right and what is wrong. If I think about myself, my happiness and t it hurts my wife, am I selfish or should I restrict my feelings, please advise way out
Ans: Dear Dhruv,
The easiest way to feel better when a relationship is failing is to get into another one. Searching for what you want in the original relationship cannot be found anywhere else; so giving into that temptation is only going to make things more confusing.
So, if you still love your wife and want to make it work, what have the two of you done so far to make things work?
Working on the marriage is a task that needs effort and a certain kind of stubborn nature that will help you cross over the the challenges that can emerge.
Your marriage now requires a complete RESET. So, push that button and go back to where it all began; no baggage, no expectations, no complaining...When you accept a situation, then do so fully...you can't have children; if you have accepted it then what's the reason to move apart. It only suggests that it was a compromise and not an acceptance.
Understand that acceptance is being graceful about the situation and being supportive of one another. Begin life afresh; date one another...laugh together, do things together. Bring back the little joys and bigger goals for marriage and life...
And most importantly, be in complete support of one another! That hidden love that you both share needs to be watered and nurtured even more...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4275 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 06, 2025

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Career
My son is completing 12th. He is interested in Graphics design. What are the options in this field to study?
Ans: Pradeep Sir, Graphic design offers numerous career opportunities in advertising, branding, publishing, digital media, gaming, and animation. A Bachelor's Degree in Design (B.Des) in Graphic Design or Communication Design is a 4-year degree that provides in-depth knowledge of graphic design, typography, branding, and digital design. Top colleges offering B.Des include National Institute of Design (NID), MIT Institute of Design, Symbiosis Institute of Design, Srishti Institute of Art, Design and Technology, UPES School of Design, and Anant National University. A Bachelor's Degree in Fine Arts (BFA) in Applied Arts or Graphic Design is a 3-4 year course focusing on artistic skills along with graphic design. Diploma courses in Graphic Design are also available, such as MAAC, Arena Animation, Pearl Academy, and National Institute of Fashion Technology. Online graphic design courses can be a flexible option for flexibility. After completing studies, graphic designers can work in advertising agencies, branding and marketing firms, digital media and social media companies, e-commerce and IT companies, publishing and print media, gaming and animation (2D graphic designer), and freelance. IMPORTANT NOTE: As already March has started, it is advisable to apply for 3-4 entrance exams of concerned Colleges and also UCEED, NID-DAT, SEED, MIT-DAT, SEAT, NIFT, Pearl Academy etc. If your son wants to study in top government institutes, he should prepare for UCEED or NID DAT.
If he prefers top private design colleges, exams like SEED, MIT DAT, SEAT, UPES DAT, and Pearl Academy are good choices.
If he is open to fine arts-based programs, NIFT and BFA Applied Arts exams (like MH-AAC CET for J.J. Institute of Applied Art, Mumbai) are also good options. All the best for your Son's admissions, Pradeep Sir!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4275 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 06, 2025

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Career
My daughter is in 12th and she wants to pursue design as her career not the fashion and interior one but on the IT side. Does this career option have a good career prospects. What are the good colleges where she can do her bachelor degree from which has good placements.
Ans: Tarunima Madam, It's great that your daughter is interested in pursuing a design career in the IT field.

The IT field, also known as UI/UX Design, Interaction Design, or Digital Product Design, offers excellent career prospects due to the growing demand for user-friendly digital products. Companies are actively seeking skilled designers who can create intuitive and aesthetically pleasing digital interfaces. The demand for UX/UI designers, product designers, and interaction designers is growing globally, with diverse opportunities in tech companies, startups, e-commerce platforms, banking & fintech, healthcare, and gaming. Top UI/UX designers in India and abroad earn competitive salaries, with entry-level packages ranging between ?6-12 LPA in top companies. This field also allows for freelance work and global job opportunities.

The demand for innovative designers will continue to grow with the rise of AI, AR/VR, and Web3 technologies. Top institutes in India for UI/UX & Interaction Design include the National Institute of Design (NID), Indian Institute of Technology (IIT), IIT Guwahati, IIT Jabalpur, MIT Institute of Design, Sristi Institute of Art, Design and Technology, UPES, ISDI, Symbiosis Institute of Design, and Anant National University.

If you can afford and if your daughter is interested in studying abroad, globally renowned schools for UI/UX design include Carnegie Mellon University, Rhode Island School of Design, Parsons School of Design, Royal College of Art, University of Arts London, and TU Delft. Pursuing a career in IT-related design is a smart choice with excellent career growth. All the best for your daughter's admissions!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4275 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 06, 2025

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Career
My son secure 97.03 percentile in jee main session 1 in general category can he get CSE in any NIT
Ans: Shashi Sir,

How to Predict Your Chances of Admission into NIT or IIIT or GFTI After JEE Main Results – A Step-by-Step Guide

Once the January JEE Main session results are declared, many students and JEE applicants start asking common questions about eligibility for specific institutes (NITs, IIITs, GFTIs, etc.) based on their percentile, category, preferred branch, and home state.

Providing precise admission chances for each student can be challenging. Some reputed educational websites offer ‘College Predictor’ tools where you can check possible college options based on your percentile, category, and preferences. However, for a more accurate understanding, here’s a simple yet effective 9-step method using JoSAA’s past-year opening and closing ranks. This approach gives you a fair estimate (though not 100% exact) of your admission chances based on the previous year’s data.

Step-by-Step Guide to Check Your Admission Chances Using JoSAA Data
Step 1: Collect Your Key Details
Before starting, note down the following details:

Your JEE Main percentile
Your category (General-Open, SC, ST, OBC-NCL, EWS, PwD categories)
Preferred institute types (NIT, IIIT, GFTI)
Preferred locations (or if you're open to any location in India)
List of at least 3 preferred academic programs (branches) as backups (instead of relying on just one option)
Step 2: Access JoSAA’s Official Opening & Closing Ranks
Go to Google and type: JoSAA Opening & Closing Ranks 2024
Click on the first search result (official JoSAA website).
You will land directly on JoSAA’s portal, where you can enter your details to check past-year cutoffs.
Step 3: Select the Round Number
JoSAA conducts five rounds of counseling.
For a safer estimate, choose Round 4, as most admissions are settled by this round.
Step 4: Choose the Institute Type
Select NIT, IIIT, or GFTI, depending on your preference.
If you are open to all types of institutes, check them one by one instead of selecting all at once.
Step 5: Select the Institute Name (Based on Location)
It is recommended to check institutes one by one, based on your preferred locations.
Avoid selecting ‘ALL’ at once, as it may create confusion.
Step 6: Select Your Preferred Academic Program (Branch)
Enter the branches you are interested in, one at a time, in your preferred order.
Step 7: Submit and Analyze Results
After selecting the relevant details, click the ‘SUBMIT’ button.
The system will display Opening & Closing Ranks of the selected institute and branch for different categories.
Step 8: Note Down the Opening & Closing Ranks
Maintain a notebook or diary to record the Opening & Closing Ranks for each institute and branch you are interested in.
This will serve as a quick reference during JoSAA counseling.
Step 9: Adjust Your Expectations on a Safer Side
Since Opening & Closing Ranks fluctuate slightly each year, always adjust the numbers for safety.
Example Calculation:
If the Opening & Closing Ranks for NIT Delhi | Mechanical Engineering | OPEN Category show 8622 & 26186 (for Home State), consider adjusting them to 8300 & 23000 (on a safer side).
If the Female Category rank is 34334 & 36212, adjust it to 31000 & 33000.
Follow this approach for Other State candidates and different categories.
Pro Tip: Adjust your expected rank slightly lower than the previous year's cutoffs for realistic expectations during JoSAA counseling.

Can This Method Be Used for JEE April & JEE Advanced?
Yes! You can repeat the same steps after your April JEE Main results to refine your admission possibilities.
You can also follow a similar process for JEE Advanced cutoffs when applying for IITs.

Want to Learn More About JoSAA Counseling?
If you want detailed insights on JoSAA counseling, engineering entrance exams, and preparation strategies, check out EduJob360’s 180+ YouTube videos on this topic!

Hope this guide helps! All the best for your Son's admissions!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4275 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 05, 2025Hindi
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Career
My son has got 99.6 percentile in JEE mains 2025 jan . What should be the possible options and priority of sequence ?
Ans: How to Predict Your Chances of Admission into NIT or IIIT or GFTI After JEE Main Results – A Step-by-Step Guide

Once the January JEE Main session results are declared, many students and JEE applicants start asking common questions about eligibility for specific institutes (NITs, IIITs, GFTIs, etc.) based on their percentile, category, preferred branch, and home state.

Providing precise admission chances for each student can be challenging. Some reputed educational websites offer ‘College Predictor’ tools where you can check possible college options based on your percentile, category, and preferences. However, for a more accurate understanding, here’s a simple yet effective 9-step method using JoSAA’s past-year opening and closing ranks. This approach gives you a fair estimate (though not 100% exact) of your admission chances based on the previous year’s data.

Step-by-Step Guide to Check Your Admission Chances Using JoSAA Data
Step 1: Collect Your Key Details
Before starting, note down the following details:

Your JEE Main percentile
Your category (General-Open, SC, ST, OBC-NCL, EWS, PwD categories)
Preferred institute types (NIT, IIIT, GFTI)
Preferred locations (or if you're open to any location in India)
List of at least 3 preferred academic programs (branches) as backups (instead of relying on just one option)
Step 2: Access JoSAA’s Official Opening & Closing Ranks
Go to Google and type: JoSAA Opening & Closing Ranks 2024
Click on the first search result (official JoSAA website).
You will land directly on JoSAA’s portal, where you can enter your details to check past-year cutoffs.
Step 3: Select the Round Number
JoSAA conducts five rounds of counseling.
For a safer estimate, choose Round 4, as most admissions are settled by this round.
Step 4: Choose the Institute Type
Select NIT, IIIT, or GFTI, depending on your preference.
If you are open to all types of institutes, check them one by one instead of selecting all at once.
Step 5: Select the Institute Name (Based on Location)
It is recommended to check institutes one by one, based on your preferred locations.
Avoid selecting ‘ALL’ at once, as it may create confusion.
Step 6: Select Your Preferred Academic Program (Branch)
Enter the branches you are interested in, one at a time, in your preferred order.
Step 7: Submit and Analyze Results
After selecting the relevant details, click the ‘SUBMIT’ button.
The system will display Opening & Closing Ranks of the selected institute and branch for different categories.
Step 8: Note Down the Opening & Closing Ranks
Maintain a notebook or diary to record the Opening & Closing Ranks for each institute and branch you are interested in.
This will serve as a quick reference during JoSAA counseling.
Step 9: Adjust Your Expectations on a Safer Side
Since Opening & Closing Ranks fluctuate slightly each year, always adjust the numbers for safety.
Example Calculation:
If the Opening & Closing Ranks for NIT Delhi | Mechanical Engineering | OPEN Category show 8622 & 26186 (for Home State), consider adjusting them to 8300 & 23000 (on a safer side).
If the Female Category rank is 34334 & 36212, adjust it to 31000 & 33000.
Follow this approach for Other State candidates and different categories.
Pro Tip: Adjust your expected rank slightly lower than the previous year's cutoffs for realistic expectations during JoSAA counseling.

Can This Method Be Used for JEE April & JEE Advanced?
Yes! You can repeat the same steps after your April JEE Main results to refine your admission possibilities.
You can also follow a similar process for JEE Advanced cutoffs when applying for IITs.

Want to Learn More About JoSAA Counseling?
If you want detailed insights on JoSAA counseling, engineering entrance exams, and preparation strategies, check out EduJob360’s 180+ YouTube videos on this topic!

Hope this guide helps! All the best for your son's admissions!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know more on 'Careers | Health | Money | Relationships'.

...Read more

Dr Dipankar

Dr Dipankar Dutta  |912 Answers  |Ask -

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Mar 05, 2025

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