Overly Jealous Boyfriend: Is My Friend Flirting?

Dear LG, My boyfriend is very handsome and nice but he is of a jealous kind. He says it is okay if I talk to other boys but every time I talk to someone we fight. He wants to check my phone and he says I can check his phone too. He does not like my choice of clothes or my wearing dresses. He dresses how I want and always asks if I like what he is wearing. If I don’t, next time he changes. Is this good to go ahead or not good? I am not sure but I like him and my family likes him too. SK

Dear Anu, my boyfriend and I are school mates. We studied in the same class. We have been in a relationship for more than 10 years and currently we are working.There is a girl in his life whom we know through common friends. Through one of his friends we got to know that there were a lot of rumours about my BF and her being together earlier. However my BF explained that he treats her like a sister and there is nothing between them.I got the same explanation from that girl as well. So I accepted their relationship stance and went ahead without any doubt.Right now our relationship is very less lively and sparkling. We spend less time together as we are committed in our work and trapped in debt too. Due to family responsibilities, he spends less time with me. He says he has lot of work and hardly meets me. I have been learning over the past few months that my bf and the girl are seemingly growing closer. She calls him daily to ask about his whereabouts and every detail of our life. She knows more about him than me. Recently my BF was out with his family and he was not reachable for a day.When he is out with family, I would give time to let him update me but the girl messaged me to check if my BF updated me where and what he is doing, whether he is safe or not and what time he will be back. For me this concern seems little fishy. Pls advice on this. I am thinking about talking to my BF. I need advice on how to manage the situation and get proper explanation out of it.

Hi Anu I am in relationship and have 2 male best friend . My my best friend dosent know about my bf and we are very much close to each other that sometime we say love you kind of words but pure friendship but my bf dosent understand this he is like pls stop talking to them but i cant do that What should i do ? Pls help

Dear Anu ma'am, please keep this anonymous. My bf often speaks about weight of girls, rather the size. So today he told something in those lines about a junior colleague of mine. I like my colleague who is very nice to me. I told please don't talk like that it is bad behavior and I don't want to talk such a way. This is rude. Then I added how would you like if someone talks same about your mother. So he started showing tantrums, started shouting speking badly about me that I am taking things personally and showing some gestures. He turned the table telling that I take everything on myself etc etc. I told you are a hypocrite since you tell that you respect women but actually you don't....and so the fight increased etc etc... I want few tips/suggestions from you: 1. Was I wrong to personalise a offense to him so he understands and stops? 2. Did he cross boundary? I have had enough...i have told this earlier too. 3. Is it good to try and connect to a person when he is wrong? 4. He told me it os enough i cant go with you anymore...was I at fault? He seems a sorted guy, responsible etc...but this has become too much Please advise..I am at my wit's end wondering if I was at fault. Should we love someone like this?