Dear Anu Madam,
Please help me with your urgent advice. I am a 23-year-old good-looking girl from well-to-do Marwari family.
Since 2017 I am in relationship with a 37-year-old who I met in a gym. He is a small-time model.
Within 1 month of meeting, we got physical. However, in August 2021, to my dismay, I came to know that he has two wives and children and that he is in physical relationship with several other girls. This pained me a lot and we broke up. But somehow we got back.
He pleaded sorry for hiding his marriage and cheating with other girls but he said that the other girls had forced him for a physical relationship. He says he is unhappy in marriage and if I marry him, it will give him new way of life. I loved him and decided to get married (he can legally have more wives). But still I felt absurd on my decision because I will face severe parental resistance as he is from different religion and has less money. Yet I made up my mind on marriage and so, six months ago I revealed this to my closest cousin and introduced her to him. I followed up with her to guide me on right decision but my cousin kept buying time. About two weeks ago, while accidentally checking her mobile messages, I found that though I introduced my cousin to my BF to help me, she was cheating on me. From her messages I could see that she persuaded my BF to get physical with her. This shattered me completely and I fought with her. Madam, please advise me. I love this guy and want to marry him. He is my 1st and last love. I am sure he will be a changed guy after our marriage, which will make us both Happy.

Hi Ma'am, I have been in a relationship for almost a decade now i.e. since graduation and now me and my bf are doing good in our respective jobs. Since we come from different religions, we have been trying to convince our family very much for last two years to let us happen and get married and in these scenarios during covid I lost my father too now that it's just me and my mom and my elder sister due to societal pressure also they were not agreeing for us but then I could feel now that his family was some how just dragging us showing fake acceptance for me but still being very orthodox but in this process me and my bf got committed to each other very seriously in terms of physical ways but now his family is completely denying the fact that they don't us to happen and are literally forcing his son to marry in their caste. On this thing, the guy is trying to make me understand with false accusations that it's not his family butine which doesn't want us to proceed since my family wanted a mutual ways of marriage and not just his culture thing or else court marriage was the last opt but my guy is saying no I can never go against my family this and that you better understand and I don't know I'm feeling very cheated that now at this stage after being this close where he should have been standing strong with me he's pushing me to set back I don't know iam so clueless I got no energy to get back to being productive in my life or something whereas this acts of his and his family's forcible nature is somehow triggering me to opt for legal methods....I need guidance it's all dark for me and feeling too used.

Hello, I am 41 year old professional. I had met my husband before marriage though social media 5 years back and thereafter maintaining distance relationship and meeting occasionally for 3 years we got married in 2021. It was a struggle for marriage as it was inter caste and inter religious marriage. Everything was smooth in relationship to the fact that I’m responsible for all financial matters as my husband has no job. He is still trying and looking for job. I didn’t mind much but would encourage him to get the job to be mentally and physically fit. Last year we went to his nephews marriage to his village. It was of 7 day programme. On second day I noticed him watching another women ( nephews mother’s sister who has 2 daughters) At that time I didn’t pay attention. After 2 days on a night function I saw my husband texting from far but he looked at that lady again. She also seemed to texting. I became suspicious. Later that night when he came to room I asked to show him his phone he was reluctant. I had to snatch his phone and I saw that he was texting the same lady and in that had asked her to meet her alone. and asking her where he can meet her. I gnashed cried and made a huge scene coz this was not what I had expected. He tried to convince that she was his girlfriend of past and suddenly after seeing her after sometime he only wanted to talk to her. I only asked her ... why alone? He had told me during dating that she had a girlfriend ( never told her identity) and that she has married and moved on. Feeling cheated I could not sleep but only cried that night and in the morning if we can return to our city. Programme had not finished but he agreed and we left. Since then that night and those days still haunt me ; thinking what didn’t I do to love him so much and in return we get cheated. I’m still with him, but mentally I still feel cheated and still am in doubt that he is in touch with her. I am not able to do my duties as part of my mind thinks he cheats me though I have confronted many times on this and he denies that he is not in touch with her Should I leave him or continue with this marriage? We still don’t have any baby.

Hi I am 39 year married woman with one 13yr boy and living in joint family. I am doing everything very honestly and sincerely as housewife but I never got love respect as wife from my husband and few years after our marriage I had seen changes in his behavior and day by day he is getting very rude towards me. So I decided to enquire the reason behind these and came to know that he is having affair with someone whom he is treating as his wife and giving everything to her as his wife and also wants to marry her. I told these to both of our parents and after talking with him he assured of not continuing the affair. But after that incident I had not seen any change in his behavior and still acting in the same way. I told these to my parents but because of some compulsion we both discussed and decided to accept it and continue it the way as it is but these is very difficult for me to accept these and continue these relationship. In my schooldays I likes a boy, we love each other but after my marriage we had never been in contact with each other and he also not contacted me .But after these incident and during Corona I contacted him to know how he is and came to know that he is still unmarried and waiting for me and I told him about my married life.As he loves me very much and still wants me as his wife and told me that he will accept me as I am. As I also loves him a lot and after knowing that he is still waiting for me its become very difficult for me live without him as now i doesn’t feel complete without him. I remain honest in my married life but after these incident I dont want to live here and also unable to leave because of family condition and also because of the society we lived in. We shares everything with each other . He respects me and my feelings and loves me a lot and I feel that he is always there for me and will support me in all respect. Kindly guide

Hello..I am 36 hrs old, a doctor, got married for 2nd time in Apr 2022. My 1st marriage was with a doctor in 2011 but we hardly stayed together for 1 month since he was away in another state for higher education. Indifference arose and we got separated soon after 6 months and got divorced 5 yrs later. Then i did job on off and finally finished my post graduation in 2024. During my post graduation i wanted to desperately get married for 2nd time as my age was increasing and i was feeling very lonely and wanted to settle down n have kids. I met a guy (he too a doctor and divorced) on matrimony. He approached me. We started talking, meeting. Everything was going good. But his mother was against our relationship. In between the guy too cut the contact with me. But i was wo trully in love with him that I wanted to marry him only. Somehow we got connected again. He came to my place and we lived together. He said he can't get married so soon. He said he would marry me only of i wl get pregnant.then i got pregnant and finally he married me in temple. Soon i delivered our child and his parent's accepted me n i went to his house to stay. There we used to have lots of fights as he revealed his true nature of being extremely KANJUS. his whole family was extremely kanjus. My husbnd doesn't like to spend a single Rs too and he doesn't like it if i spend my money too. We used to have frequent fights. Then hardly after 2 months, his mother called my parents and she told them that their sje could not tolerate me and i should leave tbeor house ASAP! I became very furious as my baby was jst 4 months old. Where would i stay alone with my child as i was studying. I called police to intervene and my mother in law got very angry, she cursed me in front of police- she called me a pros***ute. (This was her thinking- any woman who marries for 2nd time is a pros***ute!!!) Finally that night around 10pm i left her house with my child and some essentials. My parents stayed with me to look after my child. My husbnd kept visiting me on weekends. But my husbnd used to avoid me, block my calls. He never paid for my daughter's expenses too. A year have been passed. I have sent my baby to my parents house 6 months back as they wanted to go back as they stay in different state. Now my husbnd has cut all the ties, he has blocked me everywhere and he never called to enquire about our child in last 8-9 months. Last time when my father called him- he said he didn't wanna stay with me and I either can keep our child with me or i can give the child to him for rest of the life. I slipped into depression after all these. I messed up in my exams. I'm so disturbed that i had thought of ending my life many times but i reminded myself about my child. Now I don't know what to do. I talked him about divorce but he said he won't give me a single Rs aftr divorce since i am also earning. My parents too don't want me to go for a divorce 2nd time in my life as they are worried- our relatives and society will shame them. I want to bring my child back but i am worried- how will i take care of my baby since i am working. Please help. Keep me anonymous please.