I am a 38-year-old software engineer from Pune, married for three years. My wife often keeps comparing me to her ex and other men. I used to ignore it earlier and it started affecting my self confidence. But now I feel she is doing it to make me feel incompetent and irresponsible. I do not want to be compared to other men. This is leading to unnecessary fights and arguments. How do I handle the constant criticism without losing my confidence?

Ans: Hello sir. I hope you are in good health. Marriage is a long term association in which slowly and slowly we get to know about the positives and negatives of a person. We all have two sides. One is romantic and other is the one who handles all the responsibility. Isn't it good that your wife responsibly handles all the household chores along with your kids and takes care of your needs too. May be she is also lost somewhere and is burdened under all responsibilities. I understand that you may have problems and you may not feel the emotional connection between you too.
There are ways to sort out this. Find some common interest that you both enjoy and do such activities. You may talk with your wife at the end of the day and ask her about her day, you can share about your day. You can discuss your future plans.
In previous times extra marital affairs were very less. Because people used to work with each other and work on each other. They never used to give up on each other. That's why the relationships used to last for more than 50 years even.
You can talk to your colleague as a friend. Friends do listen to each other and have emotional connect but having more than that would not be advisable.
I hope you get some light in your mind.
Take care!
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

Ans: Dear geeta,
Aapka sawaal kya hai?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am unaware on what I suggested to you since I can't see the earlier question here.
It's great that the time period of separation has helped you both cherish those 50 years of togetherness; maybe now your wife has in fact changed and looks forward to spending the rest of her life with you. People can change, right?
Spend some time with her and then you will know more...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What can you do about it? If she does not want a divorce and this is a vengeance thing for your affair, the only thing you can do is speak with her. All the stuff that went South needs to be addressed and YES, there will be a point in time where she will expect you apologize. Yes, you did mention to her about how you view marriage BUT you still went ahead and married and had had kids as well. As far as she is concerned, she always was in an ideal marriage while you had your definition for it and both of you lived the relationship in your own ways.
The best is to appeal to her better sense and hope that someday she will see that it is better to separate than stick together.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Whether you should make the marriage work or live separately is a decision that is yours to make; what I can suggest is to actually understand and become aware as to what you want in life.
If marriage was always an important thing, then maybe some work in that direction can help which means you may have to as a couple set aside differences and work as a unit to put the marriage back together. This also will require your husband to cooperate and view it as important as you do. So, have a conversation with him without it leading into an argument.
Now, if you choose to go separate how and what will be an advantage is something that only a lawyer will be able to guide you on.
So, as a first step become aware about whether you view marriage as an important structure in your life or not; the rest of the steps will follow from this.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Does not matter where you do your BBA from if your focus is CAT. Ensure that your academic performance in the college is good with good percentage.

Ans: Core CS provides a broader foundation and flexibility, while AI/ML is more specialized. Core CS is generally the safer, more future-proof choice, with AI/ML remaining highly relevant but better pursued as a specialization later.
However, from a practical perspective: With the non-stop changes in the tech field, it is highly risky to predict what will happen to any course in 4 to 5 years. One has to stay updated to face the challenges and must have an urge to learn new technology.

Good luck.
Follow me if you receive this reply.
Radheshyam

Ans: Here is the pointwise reply to your questions-
(1) With the mentions score, the chances are slim in NIT Surat and Nagpur for the mentioned branches, considering you are from the general category. (2) Specialization vs General: A general degree (CS/ECE/ME) is safer at the UG level; specialization (like VLSI/AI) can be done later. (3) BS-MS: Better for research and higher studies, and BTech: Better for placements and industry jobs

Good luck.
Follow me if you receive this reply.
Radheshyam

Ans: It is very encouraging that you are planning to increase your mutual fund investment to Rs 35 lakh. This shows strong commitment towards long-term wealth creation. With proper structure and category selection, this amount can grow meaningfully over time.

Let me guide you step-by-step on how to invest and how to limit risk for better returns.

» Whether investing Rs 35 lakh in mutual funds is a good idea

Yes, it is possible and suitable to invest Rs 35 lakh in mutual funds.

But important point is:

– do not invest full amount at one time
– invest gradually
– follow proper category allocation
– match investment with your time horizon

Gradual investment improves return stability and reduces market timing risk.

» How to invest Rs 35 lakh properly

Best approach is phased investment using STP method.

Example approach:

– keep amount temporarily in liquid category fund
– transfer monthly into equity category funds
– complete transfer over 6 to 12 months

This protects your investment from market volatility.

» Suggested allocation structure for best long-term returns

A balanced structure helps achieve good growth with controlled risk.

Suggested allocation pattern:

– 35% Flexi cap category fund
– 25% Large & midcap category fund
– 20% Midcap category fund
– 10% Multi asset allocation category fund
– 10% Small cap category fund

This combination supports long-term wealth creation.

» How to limit risk while investing Rs 35 lakh

Risk control is very important when investing a large amount.

Follow these steps:

– invest through staggered method instead of lump sum
– avoid investing in too many schemes
– limit small cap allocation
– review portfolio once per year
– increase allocation only after market corrections

These steps improve return consistency.

» How many mutual funds should be selected

For Rs 35 lakh investment:

Ideal number of funds:

– minimum 4 funds
– maximum 6 funds

More funds reduce portfolio efficiency.

Proper category diversification is more important than number of funds.

» Important preparation before investing Rs 35 lakh

Before investing ensure:

– emergency fund already available
– health insurance coverage available
– no short-term money included in this amount
– investment horizon minimum 5 years (preferably longer)

This protects financial stability.

» Finally

Yes, you can invest Rs 35 lakh in mutual funds successfully.

Invest gradually through STP method, diversify across 4 to 6 categories, and control small cap exposure. With discipline and patience, this structure can support strong long-term wealth growth.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/