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Dating Anxiety: 34-Year-Old Woman Panics at the Thought of Marriage

Ravi Mittal |577 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 06, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 21, 2024Hindi

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Hi, I am 34 F , whenever topic of marriage comes, I get panic irrespective of the thing what situation I am in, good bad favourable or unfavorable What is better to take charge of finding husband for you or just let parents find one In any case the one who has to deal will be me. Just in first I will be fully responsible.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Marriage is indeed a significant decision and it can be scary to many people. First of all, I want you to understand that you are not alone. Coming to your next question, see there are advantages to both methods- on the one hand, if you find your own partner, you can pick a more compatible person. Whereas, parents have better judgment, most of the time. So, why don't you try a mix of both? For instance, you can create a profile on a dating app and find yourself someone compatible from there. It doesn't immediately have to be for marriage. You can simply get to know each other first and then move things forward. The way to make sure that you find someone who would be interested in marriage is to mention that in your bio- "seeking a connection that can lead to marriage." Once you think you both are ready to talk marriage, you take it to your parents and let them use their years of experience to double-check if the connection is worth pursuing.
Hope this helps.

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Im 37 employed in a private sector im. Not geting any marriage alliance my parents are very sad wat could be the best way for this issue

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Hie I need an advice about marriage, I am 28 years old and wants to marry a guy who is younger than me, however earns good salary. Also we are from different caste. I am afraid of having conversation about this with my parents and also I am confused that how to have this conversation with my parents. He loves me a lot and always support me. Also i got engaged with different person (arranged marriage), however that person broke the engagement and now I wont be able to trust and give chance to a new person to come into my life.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Why exactly did you get engaged with someone else when you say that you are in love with another person?
I don't get this...Have the conversation with you parents stating clearly what you want. Yes, your parents will and might oppose it for whatever reason, but if you and the boy are serious, then pursue it...
Then where is the question of a new person coming and your trusting etc. From your email/letter, one thing is clear to me is that: you have no idea what you want. You love someone and say that you want to marry him and then you go and get engaged to someone else and now you are wondering if you can trust someone new.
What is going on? What happens to your 'guy'? Are you serious about that relationship at all?
I think you really need to first sit and have a conversation with yourself and then talk to your parents, yeah?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Asked by Anonymous - Feb 23, 2025Hindi

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Respected ma'am I am Priyanka, looking for marriage from quite sometime now. Soon i am turning 31, parents are worried.. i have never been in a romantic relationship in my teens or 20s.. that's because I didn't want to go against my parents.. now most of my friends and juniors are getting married.. i feel left out.. i feel i am not getting the right guy for marriage.. i feel i may not be ready for a marital relationship, feel shy about it.. what to do, please advise and help

Ans: Hello Priyanka - Indian parents tend to worry if their child does not get married and more so as they enter in their 30s, so it is normal. The question here is - will you be ok to find your person or will go with what your parents want...this is something you need to respond to. Also how much do you know yourself - whilst you are saying you are not ready for marriage, you should know why not...you may like to schedule a 1:1 with me - google and you will know how.

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 17, 2025Hindi

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Hi Everyone, I'm 28M, IT employee, please do think from my perspective what am I about to ask. Since according to indian standards I'm already late for marriage. Now the thing is I've seen enough of failed marriages, not only in news but in own family and not everytime it was fault of the female part but I've seen good men struggling to handle themselves, few times their parents in jail. Thing is I won't be able to tolerate this kind of situation and I'm afraid of myself if I'm ever in this situation. My mother has sacrificed enough to put me through school and college and I do not wish to put her in any trouble because someone had a previous relationship which they are not able to forget or they don't like me then but get's married for the sake of it. I've never been in relationship and has been introvert throughout my life. Things that I've seen in my office and on news and at home have shaken my trust into anyone. A guy like me who use to trust anyone just because they say so is not struggling to even trust my own parents sometimes. Now please don't give me argument like not evey women is like this. I know but I just can't trust anyone and I've told this to my parents yet they insist on me being married. Everyone around me is just telling me how important it is to be married but I just can't. Since I'm only kid of my parents now my mum stopped talking to me a d I've given her my side yet she is pretty adamant on me getting married. Kindly let me know how should I proceed. Also I'm not interested even in being live in or having a girlfriend. I just don't know what to make of my life. So pretty confused, angry, frustrated and what not. Also my mother says that she'll have a thorough background check before taking things any further. I know how cute she is. She thinks everyone is as honest as her. Kindly guide me about how should I proceed since most of the people in my family is now not talking to me.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
How have you managed to confuse yourself so much? You know how?
By reading into situations that have happened outside of you way too much. Yes, I will say this to you; not all women are the way you perceive.
If you got attacked by a cat, you will say...All cats are aggressive and dangerous. Is this true? Are all cats that way or just the one that you got attacked by?
In your case, you have only seen failed marriages and you have concluded as some universal truth that things will go bad and then you have gone to the extent of protecting your mother. Do you not see what rigid thinking can do? Confuse you, derail you, disillusion you...
If you wish to set things right, change the way that you are thinking of marriage, potential partners for marriage...focus on what can go right rather than on what can go wrong, will help you a lot in this.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Undergraduate (UG) degrees provide foundational knowledge, including how to conduct research. In postgraduate (PG) studies, you generally build on those basics. After completing your PG studies, you can engage in research, either full-time or by pursuing a PhD.

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 17, 2025Hindi

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I accidentally called my current partner by my ex's name while having a private moment. The second time I yelled when we were watching a movie starring my ex's favourite actor. Things have got a bit weird since then. I don't know how to talk about this to my partner.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Whether it was a genuine mistake or there are lingering issues that led to this slip-up, it is natural for your current partner to feel uncomfortable and even sad hearing you repeatedly calling out for your ex. I hope this much you acknowledge. Now moving on to how we can fix this- first of all, apologize; mistake or not, you can still say you are sorry. Next, have a clear discussion with your partner- ask her how it made her feel and what can you do to make it better. This way she can see that you are owing up and taking initiatives. Then, I want you to reflect- why is this happening? Did you get into this relationship before you could fully move on? Or have you been thinking about your ex? If so, why and is that fair to your present partner? I hope if you are honest with your answers, by the end of it you will have some clarity.

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I have a crush on my colleague recently. We started as a friend but one day we get drunk on one of colleague house. We talk about life and love. I asked about his ex. He told his past relationship story how they break up. I also shared some of my past situationship. We live in a same colony. So we came back home together getting drunk I told him you can lean ur head on my shoulder. And he suddenly lean his head on my shoulder and he was sleeping and I wake him up when we reached our destination. He takes me to my house and I suddenly hold his wrist. I don't why did I hold him and next morning he yes hi (call my name)how are you I didn't respond properly I'm just like yeah good after that he seems to avoid me a lot he didn't talk to me much I caught him looking at me sometimes but it might be coincidence. I think he doesn't like me

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Hey... Five years ago, I confessed my feeling to my crush. She declined my proposal politely and asked me to be friends. I respected her decision of putting down my proposal but i didn't want to in friendzone so I broke my contract with her. Since then we never encountered each other. After fuve years one of our mutual friends met her and she was asking him about me. On their 2nd meet, she initiated the conversation regarding and asking about me again in positive way. I know this can be her normal behavior. My friend told me that she was interested in talking about me and was kinda impressed from whatever my friend told her about me. I want to know about that if i am in her mind or if she wants to get connected with me or meet me ? I am kinda confused

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Like you mentioned, it is very normal for old friends to enquire about each other, especially if they have not been in touch for a long time. It might be the same in this case. The only way to tell for sure is to ask her. If you are interested in reconnecting, you can think about the same and ask her once you are back in talking terms. But I would recommend not assuming anything and getting your hopes up.

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Sir I got 90 Percentile in jee main can I get cse in any Nit's or IIIT'S ?

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IIIT Allahabad, IIIT Hyderabad, IIIT Delhi – out of reach at this rank for CSE (very high cutoffs)

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