Dear Mr. Virender Kapoor, I am working in sales for last 30 years. I was considered one of the best presenter and I used to modulate my voice effectively. Since last 5-7 years, I have lost the appetite of addressing an audience. If I do, I don't feel like impressing the audience and gripping them. I speak slow and finish my presentation in few minutes even before time. I have lost confidence. How to bring back the zeal. Thanks in advance.

Ans: Dear R, I know this feeling. So many people feel like the crowd is going to swallow them. I have a few simple tricks for you.

1. First, watch videos of a person that you admire for their public speaking skills and one who is confident and sharp in front of an audience. Watch their every move, their rate of speech, their language, their body language.

2. Next, imagine yourself as a character on a stage/podium/meeting room in place of that person and as though you imitate his/her every move.

If you think, there is more that you want to add to feel more confident watching your character, like maybe pumping your fist in the air. Watch your character do that.

3. When you think that your character looks and feels confident, simply take a step forward and take on the character and face an imaginary crowd.

4. Now simply feel the elation as you have simply taken on the same role as the person that you admire and hence you feel the same air of confidence.

The key is to practice this many times over, till your mind supports you on this. Try this, it’s fun and it does work. Have a great confident self, be happy

Ans: Firstly be fully conversant with the topic that you have to speak on.
Secondly, remember that all those around you also have a certain amount of stage fright, the idea is to tell yourself to keep focus, speak from your heart as you would do to a friend.
I always say 'relax relax relax' in my mind a number of times before I get on stage or have to face an interview... that and a bit of meditation helps for sure.

Ans: Dear Balaji,

Thank you for writing in.

First of all, stop labelling yourself (like you have mentioned in the above question "I am an Introvert type"). As humans our brains are wired to believe what information we feed to ourselves.

Second, acceptance. Accepting the way, you are. That is your strength.

Certain steps that can be considered -
- Know the agenda you are entering into. This will help you prepare in advance on the conversations you need to engage in.
If there are no agendas then you can -
- Initiate small talks. For example- talk about current affairs in the industry (avoid talking about religion or politics) as this can get sensitive. Conversation should be general in nature. This will help you break the ice with the individual.
- Asking open ended questions- such questions help you encourage others to share more information. Instead of asking yes/no questions, ask questions that require a more detailed response, such as "What was that experience like for you?" or "Tell me more about..."
- Focus on your observation- Observe your surroundings and what's happening in the environment. You can use these observations as conversation starters. For example, if you're at a restaurant, you can comment on the decor, the food, or the atmosphere.
- Share Personal Stories- Personal anecdotes can make your conversations more relatable and engaging.
-Use Body Language- Your body language can enhance your communication. Maintain eye contact, use gestures to emphasize points, and smile when appropriate to convey warmth and engagement.
-Don’t hesitate to seek for professional help- If you feel that your difficulty in engaging in conversations is causing significant distress or impacting your personal and professional life, consider seeking professional help. This should help you navigate with the tips and tricks.

Hope this helps.

All the best

Ashwini Dasgupta
To your Success. Be You. Be Confident
Author of Confidence Decoded- Is it a Skill or Attitude?

Ans: Dear Sudheer,
Reading books definitely will help you improve your communication. Listening to podcasts or commentators like Harsha bhogle will improve your vocabulary aswell. You need to make it a point to consciously speak during meetings . Aim for small improvements daily and keep smaller weekly goals for yourself .