I am a 39-year-old project coordinator. I feel I make myself too available to colleagues even outside work hours. Whenever my team member sends a text, I respond instantly. I also take up last-minute requests, and try to avoid conflict. A few weeks ago, I was on a weekend trip with my family when a coworker messaged about presentation report file he couldn't find. This keeps happening, and frankly, I don't know how to change it without affecting our relationship.

Ans: Dear Riki,
Building healthy workplace relationships is critical for success and smooth working. While you are a quieter person, do make an effort to have a few meaningful conversations with your colleagues - it builds better likeability quotient.

Ans: It's great that you're aware of the impact your talkative nature has on your work efficiency. Here are some strategies to help you manage your talkative tendencies while balancing customer satisfaction and your office responsibilities by establishing clear boundaries for your interactions with customers. While it's important to provide excellent customer service, set limits on the length and depth of conversations to ensure you can prioritize your office work. Allocate specific time slots during your day for customer interactions and office tasks. Use techniques like time blocking to schedule dedicated periods for meeting with customers and focusing on your administrative duties. Identify your most critical office tasks and prioritize them based on importance and urgency. Focus on completing high-priority tasks during designated office hours, and schedule customer meetings around these priorities. Delegate certain customer interactions or administrative tasks to your team members or support staff. Empower your team to handle routine inquiries or transactions, freeing up your time to focus on strategic priorities. When engaging with customers, practice active listening to understand their needs and concerns effectively. Summarize key points and address their inquiries efficiently to prevent conversations from veering off-topic. Clearly communicate your availability and office hours to customers. Set realistic expectations regarding response times for inquiries or follow-ups, and inform customers of alternative points of contact for urgent matters. Implement visual cues or signals to indicate when you're available for conversations with customers and when you need uninterrupted time for office work. For example, use a "Do Not Disturb" sign or closed office door during focused work sessions. Reflect on your communication habits and identify triggers or patterns that contribute to excessive talking. Practice self-awareness and mindfulness techniques to manage impulsivity and maintain focus during work hours.

Consider participating in workshops, seminars, or training programs focused on time management, communication skills, and customer service excellence. Develop strategies and techniques to enhance your effectiveness in managing customer interactions and office responsibilities.

By implementing these strategies and techniques, you can strike a balance between providing excellent customer service and fulfilling your office duties effectively. Remember that managing talkativeness is a skill that can be honed over time with practice, self-discipline, and a proactive approach to improving your work habits.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Have fun but 'secretly' is fun no? That's what he is happily enjoying...
Obviously he cares about his reputation and what if you get too involved in him; so he's making sure he has fun but in a way that has a boundary.
I would suggest let him not have the pleasure of drawing that boundary so there is not need for you to respond to any of his messages...And you are absolutely right in asking: "If we are just friends why he want to keep it private." There lies your answer. For him, possibly it has gone beyond this in his mind and hence he keeping it private. Draw your boundary NOW. Better later than never.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
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