Thanks for your Answer, Anu Ma'am. I have tried everything that you have Suggested in your Reply. I have been putting a lot of Efforts from my side to gain his Love & Trust. But he seems to be completely unmoved. I'm feeling exhausted but I can't afford to End this Marriage & lose out on the Social Status & Financial Security which he provides me with. My Parents would also be ashamed of me & in our Community, it's quite difficult for a Divorced Woman to get Re-Married & in my case, it would be near impossible if the word spreads around that my Husband has Divorced me because I wasn't Virgin. Please give me any other alternative suggestions. Shall I try threatening my Husband that I would commit Suicide or File a False 498A Case against him & his entire Family, in order to make him Love me again? Or shall I find another Partner who can satisfy my Sexual & Emotional Needs, Secretly, while continuing along with this Marriage?

है अनु मैं एक 40 वर्षीय महिला हूँ जो अपने पति से अलग रह रही हूँ, हमारे जीवन को सुंदर बनाने के उनके झूठ पर विश्वास करने के 12 वर्षों के लंबे समय के बाद तलाक की कार्यवाही चल रही है..अब पिछले दो वर्षों से उन्होंने मुझे और मेरी माँ को आर्थिक रूप से धोखा दिया है..उन्होंने मेरी कार को मेरी अनुमति के बिना एक समय में दो लोगों के पास गिरवी रख दिया और अंत में अब मैं कार खो चुकी हूँ..उन्होंने अपने ऊपर लगभग 1 करोड़ का बड़ा कर्ज बना लिया है..यह मुझे या मेरी दो बच्चियों को कभी नहीं भूलना चाहिए..हमारे पास अपना कोई घर नहीं है और न ही उन्होंने हमें कोई कार खरीद कर दी है..अब मैं जिस कार का उपयोग कर रही हूँ, वह मैंने ऋण पर खरीदी है..मैं स्वयं एक बैंक मैनेजर हूँ..मेरा जीवन बहुत निराशाजनक है और शारीरिक संबंध कम हो गए हैं और अंत में उन्होंने मुझसे अपनी उंगलियाँ इस्तेमाल करने को कहा है..और यह जानने के बाद कि उन्होंने मेरे सहकर्मी से पैसे भी उधार लिए हैं, मैंने तलाक के लिए अर्जी दायर की है और पहले ही दो सुनवाई हो चुकी हैं। मैं ऐसे धोखेबाज पर कभी भरोसा नहीं कर सकती जिसने मेरी कार गिरवी रखते समय स्टाम्प पेपर पर मेरे हस्ताक्षर करने का साहस किया.. और न्यायालय में मैंने उसके पास वापस न जाने का अपना निर्णय स्पष्ट कर दिया है, लेकिन वह मुझे और मेरे सहकर्मियों को प्रतिदिन फोन करता रहता है और अंततः मुझे उसे ब्लॉक करना पड़ा। यहां तक ​​कि मेरे कार्यालय के फोन पर भी वह कॉल करता है और मैंने उसे वहां भी ब्लॉक कर दिया.. मैं एक ऐसा व्यक्ति हूं जो एक सुंदर साझेदारी और परिवार चाहता था। इस आदमी ने सब कुछ नष्ट कर दिया.. उसके पास एक अच्छी नौकरी भी नहीं है और यह मैं ही थी जिसने उसकी आजीविका के लिए भी पैसे दिए, फिर भी उसने बिना किसी पछतावे के मुझे धोखा दिया.. अब स्थिति यह है कि मेरा एक सहपाठी था जो पहले से ही तलाकशुदा है और वह इस संकट के दौरान मेरे लिए एक सहारा था और अंततः मैं उसके प्यार में पड़ गई और उसके प्रति अपने प्यार को कबूल कर लिया.. अब वह विवाह में विश्वास नहीं करता है और मैं विवाह करना चाहती हूं। या तो वह या कोई और नहीं, मेरी सोच यही है.. मैं उसे फिर से विवाह संस्था में विश्वास दिलाने के लिए क्या कर सकती हूं.. उसने भी मेरे लिए अपनी भावनाओं को कबूल कर लिया है.. तलाक के बाद मुझे एक सहायक साथी की आवश्यकता है, मैं जीवन में अकेला नहीं रहना चाहता..अनु कृपया सलाह दें कि क्या मैं जीवन के प्रति सही दृष्टिकोण रखता हूँ या नहीं?

Recently, we had an Arranged Marriage. Before committing for the Marriage, we had a few Months of Courtship Period & got to understand each other well. He seemed to be a very Loving & Caring Person. Once, He asked me whether I was Virgin, I lied saying that I was, because I didn't want to lose such a Wonderful Guy. On our Wedding Night, he got Suspicious as I didn't bleed. Upon further Interrogation, I broke down & confessed the Truth that I had been Sexually Active in my previous Relationships, before getting Married to him. He got Disappointed as he felt Cheated & Betrayed. Since then, he's been sleeping in a seperate Room & not even talking to me properly, there's no Romance between us, at all. He'd also cancelled our Honeymoon Trip to Bali. He comes Home late, often having eaten out, doesn't ask me anything about my Day or even Care about me at all. He's become quite opposite of what he was, during our Courtship Period. Many times, I've tried to break the Ice & build some Chemistry between us, but he told me that he lost all Feelings for me, and he wouldn't even Care if I left him & his House for Good. He was Ready to give me a Divorce, if I wanted to Leave him. But I don't want to throw away this Marriage, I want to try & make it work, but there's no Cooperation at all from his side. He blatantly refused to go for Marriage Counseling with me. In the presence of other Family Members, he tries to act like a normal Husband, just to maintain his image in the Society. But when we both are alone at Home, he acts as if I don't even exist. Now I am getting frustrated, I don't understand what to do? I don't regret all that I did in my Past, I had the Right to Enjoy my Life, when I was Young & Unmarried & I don't owe any Explanation to anyone, about my Past. Now I feel I am being treated too Coldly just for a little White Lie. Did I really do something so Wrong that I don't even deserve to be Loved by the Person, I Married? If it leads to a Divorce, we both have got a lot to lose out on, hence I am trying to avoid the extreme Decision. But I don't have any idea as to how our Marriage can be Repaired & Rejuvenated, when my Husband is not at all interested in the Marriage? Please advise me what to do.

Thanks for sparing some Time to Answer my Question, Anu Ma'am... Now my Husband has returned from Thailand after Enjoying his 'Solo Honeymoon'. Now he seems quite changed. He seems to have enjoyed some of the Best Days of his Life, during his Solo Honeymoon in Thailand. He has openly admitted (without any Guilt or Shame) that he had just let go of his Inhibitions & enjoyed having lots of Sex with several Women, over the week. Since his Teens, he had many Sexual Fantasies, which he said that he'd been saving to Enjoy along with his Life Partner, but after getting disappointed due to my Lack of Virginity, he went on to Fulfill all his Sexual Fantasies by 'Hiring' different Women, spending lots of Money on them. He doesn't feel that he has Cheated on me. He says that he did all that to 'Learn & Practice' the 'Art of Love-making' I'm order to give me Sexual Pleasure & Satisfaction. He was Under-confident that he may not be able to satisfy me as I had a lot of Sexual Experience, while he was a Virgin, when we got Married. Now he feels that we both are 'Even' and he's Willing to "Forgive & Forget the Past" & work on our Marriage, if I'm also willing to, otherwise, he has no problem with going for a Divorce. Now, the Ball is in my Court & I'm in Dilemma, whether I should Accept his 'Tit for Tat' Attitude & go ahead with working on our Marriage, Believing that we both are Even now? I am still afraid of the Familial, Societal, Legal & Financial consequences, which would arise, in case of Divorce. In this situation what, do you think, is a better option? Reconciliation or Separation? (P.S: He got himself Tested & fortunately, he has not been infected with any Sexually Transmitted Diseases, as he'd always taken Care to use Protection, even while engaging in his Wildest Sexual Fantasies)