My son has take up smoking as habit ,and Idon't like it. How to advise him?

Ans: Hello. The best way to quit is cold turkey. Decide upon a low stress time in your life, start reducing by half and one fine day just quit. You may want to start a new hobby or some fun sport as a distraction to take care of the occasional craving. If you have already tried several times and failed, no worries, there are some medications that could help support you. You can see a Physician/ pulmonologist/ psychiatrist for the same.

Ans: Hello. As a parent, I can understand your hurt, disappointment and fear.

It's natural to feel betrayed when your child deceives you and engages in risky behaviour.

Here are some steps you can take to set clear boundaries and help your 14-year-old make responsible choices:

1. Talk about the lies and sneaking out

Once you've calmed down, initiate a conversation without yelling or shaming. Explain how his actions have affected you and why trust is crucial in your relationship.

Set consequences. Grounding or restricting technology access are some options. Be clear about the duration and expectations.

Encourage him to express his feelings and motivation for sneaking out. Listen actively without judgment and validate his emotions.

Emphasise safety. Address the dangers of unsupervised parties and explain why knowing his whereabouts is important for his safety and your peace of mind.

2. Address the vaping

Stay informed. Educate yourself about the risks of vaping, its health impacts, and potential addiction.
Have an open conversation. Discuss the dangers of vaping openly and calmly. Share your concerns and listen to his reasons for trying it.

Set clear expectations. Clearly state your disapproval about vaping. Explain the consequences of continuing, emphasizing both health and disciplinary considerations. Ask him to stop doing it.

Let him know you're there to help him quit the habit. Explore resources like hotlines, support groups or therapists specialising in teen substance abuse.

3. What you can also do

Have a safe space for open communication where he can express his thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment. Regular, open communication builds trust and allows you to guide him through challenges.

Establish clear expectations for behaviour, homework, chores and technology use. Discuss them openly and ensure he understands the reasoning behind them.

Acknowledge and praise responsible choices and positive behaviour. Reinforce positive actions to encourage him to make good decisions.

Teach him healthy coping mechanisms for stress, peer pressure and difficult emotions. Encourage activities like sports, hobbies or creative outlets.

Lead by example. Be mindful of your own behaviour and choices. Teens learn by observing so be conscious about how you behave.

Remember, this process takes time and patience. Be consistent, stay calm and be open to working together with your son to build trust and encourage responsible choices. If you feel overwhelmed or need additional support, seeking professional guidance from a family therapist or counsellor can be very helpful.

Ans: You can explain about the health complications. The meals at home should be completely healthy. Consult a dietician along with your son for a detailed health plan that will work out for him. Also consult a psychologist for counselling your son

Ans: Dear Rajbir,
Your son has forgotten that he is a grown-up and has challenges accepting responsibilities for himself.
So, to remind him that he is a grown-up, kindly set up an appointment with a professional who can not just identify the root cause of the issue and guide him to a place of confidence so that he can act his age.
The thing that you can do immediately which may work is to ask someone else in the family who is similar in age to your son to have a chat with him and find out what is going on...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Don't lose hope please, look for a psychologist, keep looking till you find the right fit for your son. As a father you need to keep striving till your son is no tack, you are faced with a challenge, face it boldly but calmly, like an adult, you are the adult here Manoj ji don't give up on your son. You keep your efforts going...of course there is fate, but you can't stop trying, he is just 17, not even an adult. Go talk to his friends, their parents, anything that can help your son. You are hurt that your son has become like that... but without getting your emotions out, just calmly look for a solution, you'll find it, I am very sure of that.